Chapter 4: And it was a blue dream.

-Sarah, I'm home!

He arrived a little later than expected, he bought a beautiful new hair blush for Sarah, expecting to see her smile, she was acting really weird these days, she was not the kind of girl who gave into depression; he loved how she always tried to make the best of the situation. All was so quiet, maybe she did not arrive from the party yet.

-Sarah? Are you home?

After a little walking around the house he found an envelope on top of Sarah's coffin. "To dear Alfred" . He opened it to read the letter inside.

"Alfred,

I don't even know how to start writing this, I not really good with writing so I will try my best, alright? And I had very little time to write this.

First of all this can be a good bye letter, I don't wish for it, but I will understand if you do not want to see me again after all (I hope not). I going to travel, Alfred, I don't know for how long, I won't tell you where to, you must not go after me like you did 20 years ago, please understand is for the best and I need to go through this alone.

I'm sorry for not having this talk face to face with you, but it would be much harder for me then. If you do not wish to spoke with me again because once more I'm kind of running away, I have one thing to say and that is thank you for everything. You did the most brave thing for me, you faced your fears for me, and I wish I could have been a better companion to you so I could pay off this debt, you always did what you could to comprehend this crazy mind of mine, but at this moment I need… I just need.

I will come back to Paris, and I hope you're not angry with me by then.

Good bye, dear.

Sarah."

It was like a stake pushed through his heart. Once again she was gone. He noticed that she became more mature with time, this note proved it. At least she was trying to explain her departure, but really did not say much. But Alfred knew, somehow he knew where Sarah was going to. To him, of course, the Count Von Krolock. She did not write it, but he could feel it.

How could she? He tried to be revolted, to think bad things about her, but he could not bring himself to it and would not bring himself to it. She never deceived him, she became more loving towards him over the years, but she never said I love you, he knew she didn't, at least not in the way he wanted her to.

He remembered when they were turned into vampires. First the thrill of freedom and blood thirst washing over than. A slight sparkle of passion running through them, for one moment he thought she finally wanted him too. Once they had feasted on blood, he felt brave enough to go kiss her. But she pushed him away. They had a talk:

-Don't you dare!

-Why not? My Sarah…

He tried to close the distance between them but she would not allow it.

-I'm not your Sarah! We don't have a relationship! I should get back to the castle now.

-Why?

-Count is probably waiting for me.

-Is he? Wait, do you think he is in love with you?

-Well, he is…

-I don't think he cares about you, at least not anymore. He already got what he wanted.

Looking back he could not believe how nasty he was towards her that night, he did not recognize himself while saying those harsh things for her, he somehow believed in them, but he should have been gentler towards her, like he always was.

-That's not true!

-The fact is the morning is coming and we need a place to hide away from the sun, you don't have time to get back there.

He managed to convince her to find shelter that night. But then the other night she insisted again.

-Now I'm going back to the castle, you can come with me if you wish.

-Why are you the one doing all the chasing?

-What do you mean?

-First you ran away from your home in the middle of night. A cold night with dangerous wolfs out there, leaving your family and everything you knew behind.

-I was planning on visit them.

-And they would receive a vampire with open arms?

-I'm still their daughter!

-But your dad isn't the same anymore. He is vampire just like you and me now!

-What? Is he?

-Yes! And you can probably guess who did it.

Alfred felt so much anger those two first nights of vampirism; he never talked to people like this before in his life or after. Once he get to settle down his condition he managed to get back some of his human trades. He despised the Alfred who said those horrible things to Sarah, that was not him, but yes, he was mad back then, he faced a vampire lord, was sexually harassed by his son, bit by the girl he loves, and turned into something he used to hate, of course he wasn't dealing well with the situation, he did all and all for nothing.

-No, that's not possible.

-Yes, because he did not bite you.

He was the first time in his life sarcastic.

-I allowed him to.

-You seemed scared back in the ball.

-The things we want can terrify us. Alfred, there's probably an explanation to all, I…

-Yes! He is a monster who tricked you!

-No, he is not!

-Then why isn't he here? Why are you the one who has to go to him all the time? He does not care about you, other way he would already be here. He bit you, showed you off like a trophy and let you fall in the ground.

-No, he did look out for me.

-That means you know he can come after you if he wishes to. So why don't you just wait and see if he is coming to get you?

-This is stupid.

-No, if you're so sure.

-Alright, I will wait, but just to prove you wrong.

He had to be harsh at her that was the only way to make her understand. And they wait together that night. Seven hours of pure silence that was only occasionally interrupted by Sarah's whispers "he is coming".

-Are you convinced now?

-Maybe he is lost.

-Oh my!

They heard a female voice, and some little moans.

-Did you hear that?

-Yes.

They went to see what was happening. And found a bad surprise.

-Papa! Magda?!

-Sweetie. This is not what… Oh my God, what happened to you?

-So it is true, you became a vampire.

Chagal came closer and grabbed her hands.

-What has he done to you, my poor little Sarah? I failed you. I thought those two were going to save you, but they didn't! I should have not neglected you, but I'm only a man. How could I let that Count steal you away? He kidnapped you under my nose! And now you're ruined…

-No, Papa, I'm fine and better than ever! This is exactly what I wanted!

And Alfred remembered that smile, so innocent and happy, she was indeed happy to be a vampire, she was free after all. But she was really naive to think things were going to be alright back then.

-What? What are you implying?

-He did not kidnap me, I run away to his castle, I wanted to become like this, he didn't force me. He is no monster. You will see, Papa, when he meets me, we can all…

-That's even worse! You are behaving like some… I won't even say the big sin you committed!
How could you offer yourself to that demon?

-Papa, listen!

-There's nothing more to listen. I loved you, cared about you, protected you and how you repaid me? By throwing everything I gave you in the mud, even dignity!

-How can you say that?! I still love you.

-You ungrateful child, don't want to listen anymore.

Then for the first time Sarah had courage to face her father.

-Like you ever did! You locked me away from the world, imprisoned me! And how about what I just saw? How can you betray mom with Magda? How could you do this to her?

-It's different. I deserve some prize after tolerating Rebecca for so many years.

-I cannot believe this.

She began crying.

-I did what I could for you, but now you are lost forever.

He vanished from there.

-Sarah, dear.

Magda was coming closer next to her with open arms as to offer a hug and Sarah recoiled.

-Don't you dare!

-I did not ask for your father to turn me into this… But that's not important. It must be hard for you, to fight with your father and be abandoned by the Count.

-He did not abandon me.

-Where is he then?

Sarah stayed in silence

-He is man, Sarah. A vampire one, but still a man. Once they are done with you, they threw you away. Thank God, you have this young man who seems to be a nice fellow. Take care of her, Alfred.

Magda walked away. After she was gone, Sarah fell to the ground, supported by her hands and crying. Alfred followed her and hugged her. Her head was resting in his chest.

-Do you really think I was nothing more than food to him?

-Sarah…

Then he got back his senses and his anger was suppressed by the warming need of comforting her. He did not like to see her cry, he would do anything for see her smile. He said nothing, just held her closer. And she said in a tiny voice:

-And yet I do not regret it. All I did.

-It's fine.

-But I'm not just alone now. I have no one to care for me.

-You have me!

-Still?

-Always.

In the beginning of their new life they were pure friends, he could not ask her more than that. They both really needed each other to survive their new condition. And in the first months she was always waiting, waiting for him… But he did not come, and she was sad for weeks when she gave up all the hope. But one night she woke up like nothing happened, smiling bright as she ever did as human. She stole that woman's identity, and enjoyed her non-death the best way she could, after all she was a free bird now.

She never spoke of Von Krolock again. The first years of them together, Alfred begged her a chance. He always proposed to her and she always said no. But one day he managed to convince her. He got on his knees and tried his best with his speech.

-You know I have loved you for the past 10 years.

-Alfred, please not again.

-Sarah you are my friend, my light, my life, doesn't matter what we were and what we are. I know I'm shy, clumsy and coward, not the heroic type. I cannot give you all the wonders in the world, but I can give you a house full of love and caring. I know you don't love me the way I want now, but we can build it, I promise I will spend the eternity trying to make you feel the same way I feel about you.

-And if I never return your feelings?

-Even the little you can give me can be my treasure.

She finally accepted it and he kissed her. But the kiss was so insecure from his part and cold from hers, none of them knew what they were doing. And their engagement has being up for the last ten years and he never managed to marry her like he dreamed to.

Sarah avoided his hugs and kisses all the time. Were they happy together? Alfred never knew how to answer this. He liked being around her, but sometimes even when she was sitting in front of him, she was not there. They were leading two separate lives and occasionally met in their house. He did all he could to understand what she wanted, her thoughts, her soul, but was never able to. He loved her blindly, and in the end once again she was gone.

He did not cry, he did not scream, he just stayed still, looking at the note without reading it again, just staring the last thing Sarah gave him. This was maybe the first time she explained herself to him. It felt weird for him. He knew in his heart where she was going and somehow he didn't feel the urge to stop her, all this years trying to erase that Count from her head turned into nonsense to him. He was never capable of controlling her and now he did not want to.

After all, she was never his to lose.

Answering Reviews

queenmedesa

Your language is similar to mine then, although I can't get a word in Spanish.

For me Sarah is just making some excuses up to see the Count. You know when you have a crush on someone (or actually love the person) and make up the most stupid reasons to see he or she again? And he disappeared without explanation from her life, and "what if" can really torture someone. Plus, once again Sarah is bored with her life and then a supernatural and charming being offers an escape from it, she is intrigued by Death too, something that I plan to explore in the next chapters. Besides if Uwe or Maté invited me on a trip I would not hesitate to accept it.

Wolfs bane wicked

Hello, thanks for the fav! And beautiful saying! I feel bad for Alfred, I almost cried while writing this. I hope you did enjoy this chapter, and keep on reading and reviewing! Wish me luck for the next chapter, I still haven't decided if it's going to have Sisi or not.

Hello everyone, sad chapter, I felt really bad when I wrote this. I'm not a Sarah/Alfred shipper, but now writing this fic I kind started to find them cute together, but I still think they were not made for each other. Poor Alfred. I don't know about you, but I'm really anxious to see Sisi's next appearance.

So please, help me keep the fic alive and review! I really enjoy to discuss my work or musicals.