IV
Giving In

Amon awoke drenched in sweat, his heart still pounding from his frenzied dreams. Korra had already left his side, no doubt preparing to start her day of work on the tunnel. His stomach rumbled, but he couldn't bear the thought of eating any more seaweed. Instead, he staggered toward the pool. The Avatar's scent was still all over him, and it was making his head spin. At least this morning he had recovered well enough to be able to walk, if slowly. That was one positive development in this mess.

He rounded the corner of the tunnel and stopped as Korra's bare feet disappeared beneath the surface of the water. His eyes snapped to her neatly-folded clothes by the side of the pool. He debated with himself: step away and give her some privacy? Try to tip the power balance back in his favour by embarrassing her? Approach her as a lover? His indecision paralyzed him – not something he was accustomed to – and she surfaced again, a smile on her face. It faded as their eyes locked, and then her cheeks reddened as she looked away.

"You might as well come in," she said. "I'm almost done."

He watched her, trying to discern the tone behind her words.

"I mean, I guess there's no point in being ashamed of being naked around each other now," she added, chancing a peek up at him.

If he was honest with himself, he liked the idea. He moved to the side of the pool and turned his back to her, stripping down to everything but his mask. At first, the splashes still indicated that she was continuing to play in the water, but then he felt her watching. No doubt she was studying the scars that marred his body, trying to determine what had caused them.

He slipped into the cold water, the shock invigorating his muscles and tingling his skin. Dunking his head under, he combed his fingers through his hair, shaking the water out of his mask without unbuckling it.

Korra swam closer to him, still studying him. He met her gaze with even eyes.

"You have fire nation ancestry, don't you?" she asked.

He stiffened. "My parents were non-benders."

"I've heard the propaganda. But of fire nation heritage, right? Your eyes are yellow, and your hair and skin-"

"You ask too many questions, Avatar."

She shrugged, looking a little embarrassed. "It's just – I don't know anything about you, except that you've declared war against everything I stand for. I don't even know your real name."

"What does it matter?" he asked. "Even though I have your real name, I don't use it. Our careers demand that we maintain that distance."

"Mmm, yes. You've chosen to keep things very professional." She floated on her back, her hands sculling idly on either side of her body, and his eyes were drawn to her glistening breasts. Just like his dream. Heat rose to his face, and he was grateful for the mask.

"Anyone ever tell you that you are a considerate lover, Amon?"

Had he been sitting any lower in the water, he would have choked on it. "Pardon?"

Her eyes sparkled, and he could tell she was trying intentionally to disarm him. "That moment when you gave me that gentle kiss, told me to take control." A smile slid across her lips and she closed her eyes, still floating on her back. "That was surprisingly sweet of you. If I didn't know better, I'd think you genuinely cared."

Maybe he had, in that moment. Her eyes slid open again and fixed on him, shining with hope, and he realized that he still did. The thought should outrage or terrify him, but instead it was comfortable.

Surrendering, he paddled idly to her side and floated on his back beside her. "I told you, I am no monster. You have not yet seen how gentle I can be."

She cocked an eyebrow at him. "'Yet?' I thought that nothing had changed and it was a one-time mistake."

"Only once we are outside the cave. We're still here, are we not? And if I'm going to forever traumatize the Avatar by dishonouring her, I might as well make the memory so spectacular that it will haunt her forever."

"That sounds like a promise rather than a threat." She tugged his hand and began to swim toward the ledge; as they climbed out, she pulled him on top of her. Their bodies were still slick with water, their skin sliding easily against one another as he lifted up his mask just enough to kiss her.

Though it had been surreal to have frantic, desperate sex with his worst enemy the night before, it was even harder to wrap his head around the idea that they were making love. Her fingers, all nails the night before, glided across his skin, raising goose bumps in their wake. Once she extinguished the light, he removed his mask and kissed a line down her muscled abdomen, then lower. A shuddering moan escaped from her mouth, and he wished for the light so that he could see the expression that matched it. He let her cries guide his mouth, adjusting his movements to cause as much pleasure as he could. When he was satisfied that he had taken her as far as he could without tipping her over the edge, he dragged his tongue back up her abdomen to her neck, then caught her mouth for a deep kiss.

Korra surprised him by tracing the same path down his body, and he gasped at the warmth of her mouth when it reached its destination. After a few more moments of attention, she lifted her head.

"Your moans sound...surprised."

"You claimed to be innocent," he managed, amazed at her skill.

Her voice suggested a smirk and a raised brow: "I said I was a virgin, not innocent." She returned to her work, and his eyes rolled back into his head. When he could take it no more and his resolve threatened to give way entirely, he stopped her. She crawled back up his body and their lips met again, then she rolled, pulling him on top of her. They moved together, lips barely touching, breathing in one another's groans, until the sensations began to crest. He cupped her face as she cried out, as if to shield her from anything that might dampen her pleasure, and found himself following immediately after.

They lay together after the last cries faded, hands joined on his chest, her cheek on his shoulder. He closed his eyes. Here, in the hazy warmth after lovemaking, they were not Avatar and Equalist, just man and woman.

"This is all very confusing," whispered Korra. "I feel as if I'm in some sort of bizarre dream right now."

"There is a thing to be said for living in the moment without questioning it."

"Are you politely telling me to shut up?"

"No." He smiled to himself. "You truly do not know how to simply be, do you, Avatar?"

She snorted, twirling her fingers in the faint smattering of hair on his chest. "Everyone always talks about feeling the moment, but I can't even meditate to save my life. And don't you think we're at the point where you can call me by name instead of 'Avatar'?"

"Meditation is attainable by anyone if approached correctly," he said softly, ignoring the second part of her statement. "One simply pays attention to all the details until they cease to matter and meld into great peace. It is the truest form of living in the moment." His free hand – still sluggish from its injuries – smoothed over her face. "Close your eyes. Feel the heat radiating between our skin. Trace it with your mind as it darts lazily between us, moving in slow arcs. Listen to your breath, to mine. To the beating of our hearts. Feel the cool, damp cave floor across your back. Taste and smell the world around you, assigning it colours and shapes in your mind. Watch them blend together, soften, fade."

He felt her relax beside him, melt into him. His own breaths began to slow.

"How can a man who brings me such stress also bring me such peace?" she whispered.

Amon understood completely. He envisioned himself plucking the memory from his mind, encasing it in a box and storing it deep within his heart. No matter what happened, that moment would always be theirs.