Chapter 4
AN: I don't own or gain anything concerning the characters or original plot.
As promised, Part 4. With any luck I'll have the next chapter up next week and then it should be pretty regular updates for a while! Also, a nod of gratitude to the HP-Lexicon for their time lines, with which I would be hopelessly adrift. Enjoy.
Easy read link: emsana . livejournal . com / 70041 . html
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Hogwarts, April 1992
Dear Charlie,
We are going to skip past the insults and threats and get straight to the point. You are a horrific excuse for an elder brother. The amount Mum goes on about you being a Prefect and being so wonderful at, oh, everything, you'd think you'd have at least a shred of decency, but no. We'll have you know we did do our homework for once. McGonagall refused to believe we weren't up to something fishy and after a lunchtime of interrogation she finally let us free with a --threat-- warning that she would be, we quote "keeping a ware eye open". So thanks, thanks a bunch.
On top of that, we wasted an hour standing outside in a fowl April shower after Quidditch practice and all that happened was Percy turned up –-probably to complain about us again-- to have a chat with Wood. We assume it's to do with Prefect duties and – wait! --You don't think that-- --You can't mean that-- Are you saying that Percy and Oliver are in cahoots?! Is that what McGonagall meant by keeping an eye on us? The cheek! It's bad enough using our brother but our Keeper?! That's practically family. The nerve. I never thought old McGonagall had it in her. Well, we'll thank you for the tip although --it's the first decent thing you've done for us in years-- that doesn't really explain what's going on with Percy... unless this has been going on all year.
Anyway, we're off the "bash around the Quidditch pitch" as you so charmingly put it. Give our regards to the dragons.
Fred and George
P.S. - Ha! We did solve Percy's mystery after all. Bet you feel stupid now, eh?
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"Where All Hope Is Lost", April 1992
Dear Fred and George,
I would bash my head against this desk but I haven't the energy --or the money to reimburse the damage--. Percy and Oliver are not joining forces with the staff against the two of you, as far as I know --although, thinking about it, it's entirely possible--. I cannot reiterate enough how very wrong you both are. It pains me to read your --ghastly-- brotherly correspondence on a good day but this rather takes the biscuit.
Okay, let me put this --in a manner idiots like you could understand-- plainly: Percy has seemed preoccupied lately, Percy has been spending a lot of time with Oliver Wood, Percy has never had a girlfriend.
Now, I'm --hardly-- truly sorry about what happened with McGonagall but if you're too --stupid-- oblivious to work this one out then I have to say, you deserve it. I'm 2000 miles away and I can still hazard a decent guess at what's going on. Call yourselves mischievous? You should be ashamed.
While you're scratching your heads I'll quickly ask after Ron. I presume he's still alive; gone off the reading at all? No doubt you'll have been torturing him endlessly as you've been warned off Percy. Show him some mercy too once in a while --or is that asking too much of you?--.
It's getting rather pleasant round here, although it's still a bit nippy at the higher altitudes. I have to go and --tuck in-- put the Horntails to nest. Good luck with the thinking.
Charlie
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Hogwarts, May 1992
Dear Charlie,
MERLIN'S BEARD!!! How can you even talk about your dragons at a time like this? A time when revelations are abounded and mysteries are resolved. Who cares if Ron's snuffed it? This is a moment of triumph and shall go down in history as the day we solved the enigma that is Percy. That is, if you're assuming what we're assuming, which of course you assumed first as our original assumptions were incorrectly assumed.
Alright, --let's be rational-- just answer us this: are you trying to tell us that you think Percy is gay? Only, you do realise this is Percy we're talking about? We always just assumed he would study his way through life going from book to book, happy as a hippogriff, alone. The idea of Percy having feelings of any kind for anyone gives us a horrible unsettling feeling. The idea that he might be attracted to our Keeper is just... we haven't the words. You can't possibly think Wood likes Percy though – can you? Once again, Wood is someone else we always saw going through life alone, --I suppose that makes them a good match-- he's never seemed to express any strong emotions off the Quidditch pitch, never mind towards another person. Anyway, if the chat they had the other day is anything to go by not much is going on. As far as we could tell it was very formal so obviously not much has happened yet. --Do you think Mum knows?-- we're starting to creep ourselves out.
Fred and George
P.S. - Show Ron mercy? Don't you know us at all?
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Baçau, May 1992
Dear Fred and George,
I'd take my hat off to you two, but it's actually rather windy up here and I fear I'll lose another one. Also, some of the younger dragons are quite keen on shredding what little clothing I possess so... any who. Well done for finally clocking on to what's been going on, --I'm almost proud--. I have no idea about Wood, you're the ones who fly with him so why you think I'd know is beyond me. However, I do find it unlikely from what you've said that anything is in fact going on – not that it's any of your business, so keep your noses out. Does Mum know? Well, put it this way, I wouldn't ask her if I were you --but if she's as interested in Percy's love-life as she is mine then there's no telling--. My advice is to move on with your lives, I never thought I'd say this but, go back to dung bombing Filch and leave the rest of us alone!
Fortunately I have ascertained the status of our younger brother – he is alive, and not too worse for wear --or at least will be until you two get your hands on him--. I'm sure he'll tell you exactly what he's been up to for the last month, and by extension, what I'll be doing all summer now. Suffice to say, I'll have my hands full for the next few months, and seeing as how you should both be revising for end of year exams, and have finally solved your mystery, I won't expect any owls from you for a while.
Charlie
P.S. - If I get any howlers from Percy, and or Wood in the next few weeks I will --personally hunt you both down and-- be very unimpressed by the both of you.
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Quick question to my readers – does anyone have any strong aversions to me skipping August, and September? Only I've done some maths and discovered that at the rate I'm writing it's going to take fifteen chapters to get through Percy's chartered school years (5, 6 and 7) as it is!