Chapter 4

Her eyes fluttered open for a second, the blue and red lights flashing and blinding her eyes. The pain was unbearable, all of the paramedics trying to talk to her, trying to make her stay awake. She knew the drill; although she never thought she'd ever be on the receiving end of it.

As they gently loaded her onto the gurney and into the ambulance, she replayed the events of the night in her mind. It wasn't like she could easily forget them anyway. She heard the bullet and definitely felt the bullet; but she had not seen the bullet let alone the person who fired it or what direction it had come from. But maybe if Jamie was there he could have…

Her mind began to muddle and become foggy, but she told herself that she needed to focus, she needed to get a grip and pull herself out of this.

The blood that was seeping through her clothes gave her a warm, sticky and very uncomfortable feeling in her leg and her abdomen. The loud voices of the paramedics echoed and sounded distant in her mind as she dazed in and out of consciousness. Even though she was surrounded by people – swarming around her trying to keep her alive – she felt truly alone. In her hour of need, she had no one. She had pushed the most important person in her life away and the consequences of her actions became very real to her.

The bus had not even stopped, when the doors opened and Eddie felt the familiar rush of cold air hitting her like a slap to the face. She was pushed into the hospital with nurses and doctors shouting medical jargon, which went completely over her head.

A new sense of fear settled in her chest like none she had ever felt before, it tore down the little confidence that she had left and made her feel like she needed to rise up and get out of there, her body responding to what her brain was thinking tried to rise up, not thinking about the immense pain that she would feel and the negative response that she would receive.

She was in shock now. She knew it was going to happen sooner or later; it was so sudden and it physically hurt to think and to breathe. Her chest clenched in fear and she felt like hyperventilating. All she needed was a familiar face to show her that she was not alone in this battle for her life, Linda worked at this hospital. Where was she? Where was Reagan? Was he ok? All of her thoughts rolled around in her mind and became muddled again, it was too much for her to handle, the enemy had won the battle but she was determined to make sure that they hadn't won the war.

Then everything went black.

They say that when you're dying your life flashes before your eyes. Glimpses of all the experiences that you have had: good and bad. Different people that have filled the once empty void that is or was your life. The final adrenaline surge. Your brain clinging onto the last straw of hope - that it has to stay alive.

It was true for Eddie. She was dying. But she only saw one person in her mind. One person who's face and voice clung on for dear life.

Jamie Reagan.

Eddie rolled her eyes as soon as she heard the faintest ring of her phone. She clicked decline with a lot more force than was necessary. This was the 40th time he had called her this week; at this rate, she could file a complaint against him within the next few days. But she didn't want to rock the boat.

Jamie looked at her, but said nothing. He had noticed the strange amount of phone calls she had been getting. It was hard not to notice when they were in the squad car and every five minutes her phone would start buzzing. It didn't take a genius to figure out who was still calling her 10 times an hour, he wanted to say something to her and make her file a harassment complaint against the guy however, he kept his mouth shut.

Eddie was a great cop, not to mention a strong and independent woman, she was smart but didn't like asking for help. Jamie knew that going behind her back and supposedly trying to help her would be the wrong thing to do. The last time that he had tried to do that, was three years ago, with that jackass, Jake Singer – he had genuine intentions of trying to help her but she took it the wrong way and then iced him out. He had hated that. They worked well as one unit, together: so, when she wasn't talking to him it was horrible. He didn't want to end up making that mistake again. Instead, he let her handle it; he offered his guidance and support when she asked for it, at times he took a little bit of initiative but it was mostly just up to her. However, it was times like now, when that protective urge inside of him rose up inside of him like bile in his stomach.

That was the result of his feelings; the ones he had been trying to hide for almost three years now, although they had confessed what they felt in his apartment last year, Jamie had held back and backtracked saying that pursuing their feelings was a bad idea and that they should remain in partners and friends on the job and not off. Now, Jamie had to deal with the consequences of his actions. Sure, he loved their working relationship, the way that they knew each other back to front and the way they approached situations on the job as a strong and near perfect team. But couldn't they have that same relationship off the job, facing situations in life as a perfect team? Alas, it was too late now, Eddie had brought up the idea and he had pretty much shot her down for it. So, Jamie Reagan being the stoic guy he was, had to settle with being just partners and just platonic friends for now and see where that took them.

"Jamie!" Eddie's shrill voice brought him out of his head. "Are you trying to break the steering wheel?" He looked at her confused then looked at his hands on the wheel. His knuckles were white and he finally realised the strength of his grip that he had applied to the wheel. He quickly loosened his grip and then parked the RMP outside of the precinct, he quickly turned and sheepishly looked at Eddie, her questioning look demanding an explanation from Jamie.

"Sorry," He said giving her a small lopsided grin, "your phone was annoying me a little." He couldn't very well tell her the real reason that his hands looked like they were superglued to the wheel.

"It was annoying me too." Eddie said dryly. "To be fair you were then one that told me to – and I'm quoting here 'ignore him and it will all blow over'." She added accusingly.

Jamie just looked at her. He couldn't argue with that.

"You're right." He stated. "Let's go inside and head to Anton's, on me." He smiled her, knowing that would get her attention.

Her face brightened up at what he was suggesting and she started to grin. "If you're paying, then we're definitely going." She stopped before she got out of the squad car. "But please don't take forever in the locker room, I want to get there before closing time." She walked out leaving Jamie by himself.

"I don't take forever." He muttered to himself and rolled his eyes, but followed her into the precinct.

Twenty minutes later, Eddie came out of the squad room in her street clothes, waiting for Jamie; as she predicted earlier.

"Janko!" Was the sudden bark that came from Renzulli's office. "My office now." He finished and left the door open for her to come in. Eddie immediately became suspicious, she had done nothing wrong in the past few weeks. Well nothing that she could think of anyway. She racked her brains thinking of all the possible reasons she could have been brought into her bosses' office. She thought that she had thought of everything, when she entered and was met with Sergeant Renzulli doing some paperwork.

"Janko," he said looking up at her, "come in and shut the door behind you."

That couldn't be good.

However, Renzulli must have seen the worried look on her face as he then added. "Janko, it's fine you're not in trouble. In fact," He paused to get something from under his desk. "I have a package for you." He said smiling. Anthony Renzulli was a tough cop and a no-nonsense sergeant but he was a sucker for any form of romance.

"This was delivered in the afternoon, from that flower store on 55th. What's it called again?" He said while handing over the enormous bouquet of flowers to Eddie.

"Deborah's Flowers." Eddie muttered quietly while shifting the flowers in her arms. She had not seen this coming. At all. Of all of the scenarios that she had played in her head, none of them had been as awkward as this.

"That's it." Renzulli answered, he made a mental note to himself about stopping there after work. He damn sure didn't want to be sleeping on the couch tonight.

After about a minute of deafening silence, Eddie spoke up, "Well sarge, if that's all, I'll be heading out for the night. Thank you for collecting the flowers and I'll see you at roll call tomorrow." By the time she had finished, she was already halfway out of the door and speed walking to her Porsche. She entered her car and closed her eyes, she didn't open them again until she heard a knock at her window. Unsurprisingly it was Jamie.

"Get in." No explanation was needed.

It was going to be a long night.

A/N: Hope you liked this chapter, don't forget to review, the reviews I get really encourage me to keep writing :)