Two weeks ambled by. Matt got called out of town and willingly he went. He'd had plenty of time to think, yet he still felt absolutely confused by the whole situation. He'd even sought out Doc one evening, after he'd stopped by the Long Branch. Kitty had turned away, going into her office and closing the door.

Doc could offer few words of wisdom, other than what Matt already knew. He, and he alone, needed to resolve this and until he did, he would never stand a chance of getting Kitty back into his life.

The trip proved to be the catalyst Matt needed. He had been called out to the Holloway ranch at the far edge of Ford County to check into cattle theft. By the time he rode in, it was too late to do much except spend the night and investigate the next morning.

The rancher, Zed Holloday, was a widower, his wife having died of pneumonia the previous winter. Displayed lovingly atop the broad oak mantle of the stone fireplace, he had a picture of the woman, fair of face and trim of figure and obviously cherished by her husband.

"You married, Marshal?" Zed asked as they ate their evening meal.

"Uh, no." Matt answered. He really didn't want to get on that subject.

"Then you're missing out." Zed declared. "I didn't have my Josephine for more'n a few years, but it was long enough to know how empty my life was without her in it. A woman brings something to a man, Marshal. She fills up a part of him he didn't know he had."

Matt sat quietly, pushing his food around on his plate, his appetite beginning to wane.

"Ya know, before I met Jo, I thought my life in good shape." Zed didn't seem to notice the Marshal's silence or see the strickened look on his face.

"I had this here ranch, and it was going good. I had money in the bank and plenty of food and a good house. I didn't owe no one and no one owed me. I could come and go as I pleased and I didn't have to explain nothing I did to no one. If I wanted to get up and take off hunting for a week or two I just did it. I did things my way.

But then I met Jo."

The older man paused and took a sip of his coffee. It was obvious to Matt that his mind was no longer there in the room, but somewhere in the past, gazing upon the face of the woman he loved.

"Lordy, she was pretty." Zed rhapsodized. "I don't reckon I ever saw a prettier woman. Well, that red head in Dodge, the one that runs that saloon? She might make a close second, but she's the only one I know of that could ever come close to my Josephine. And I'll tell you, Jo had more than just looks. Why she was the bravest and kindest and sweetest thing. She put her life on the line for me, more'n once, I'll tell ya. And smart? Let me tell you; I thought I was doing good out here, till Jo got a hold of my books. She helped me make more money than I ever could on my own."

Matt pushed his plate back from him, unable to even pretend to be interested in his meal. He wished the old man would just stop talking but glancing over at his host, he was pretty sure that wasn't about to happen.

Zed noticed Matt push his plate away and frowned. "Food bad, Marshal? Can I get ya something else?"

"Oh, no, no, Mr. Holloday. I guess I'm just not too hungry. It_ it was a long ride out here and I guess, I'm just a little too tired to really have much of an appetite."

"Oh," Zed answered but failed to take the hint. "Well, I guess I can understand that. I get that way sometimes. But now when Jo was alive, she wouldn't let me get by with that. She'd take care of me whether I deserved it or not. And I tell ya, there were times, I surely didn't deserve it. Why, if I had a nickel for every time she forgave me for some fool thing I done, or nursed me when I got myself stoved up, I'd be a lot richer man than I am now."

He paused again, but only long enough to refill his coffee cup.

"Yep, it's amazing to me how forgiving a woman can be when she loves a man. I figure about the only thing she won't forgive is if he was to bring another woman into their lives. And even then, she's most likely to forgive if that woman don't stay and her man promises her she'll never be back."

Zed cast saddened and guilty eyes in Matt's direction. "Least ways, my Jo did."

Matt's eyes widened at the admission. "You mean you _ ?"

"Well, not all the way, but I may as well have." Zed shrugged. "I met me an ol' gal in Hays once. She had this soft brown hair and beautiful brown eyes and boy howdy, did she ever have herself a figure. And she knew how to use it, if you know what I mean."

Zed leaned back in his chair and lightly thumped his chest. "You can't tell it by looking at me now, Marshal, but back then, I was a fine figure of a man. I had me a full head of hair and was solid muscle in every place that counts. My Jo, she never failed to tell me how good looking I was and all but_ well, I don't know. I guess after hearing it so often from her, I just sorta took it for granted, took HER for granted. You know, like she was supposed to be telling me them things cause we were together. But when this other woman come along and told me the same things, well_" he shook his head. "I guess_"

His voice dropped just then and Matt understood why.

"I guess, I let her talk go to my head some. I admit I was flattered and though she wasn't as pretty as my Jo, she was still attractive. She_" Suddenly he stopped and looked at Matt squarely. "I don't want you to think nothing bad about this other woman, Marshal. She wasn't guilty of nothing but being attracted to a man she thought was single."

As Matt's eyes widened even further, Zed nodded. "Yep, you're right in what you're thinking. I didn't tell this woman I was married. I didn't mention Jo, not once. I_ I don't really have no defense other than, well, I didn't think of it. I felt some kind of pull between this gal and me and nothing, it seemed, was gonna keep me from looking into it. Not even the woman that loved me and I loved back."

Matt cleared his throat and looked down. Zed's words stung though the old man had no idea of the effect he was having. "You, uh, you and Jo apparently got over all this though, didn't you?"

Zed nodded. "Yes, we did. But it took an awful lot of hard work, for the both of us. I had to admit that I was attracted to this girl and that I hadn't been honest with her or Jo or even myself." Zed's voice grew even softer. "I then had to talk to Jo and explain it all to her. You know, I think I'd a rather a faced a whole tribe of Indians than that woman. But I knew if I was to get her back and keep her, I had to talk to her, tell it all to her."

Matt was more than just a little curious. "How did you explain it?"

Zed shrugged again. "I just told her what was in my heart. I told her what I was thinking and more than that, what I wasn't thinking. Like, I wasn't thinking how this whole thing was hurting her. To be honest, I wasn't thinking much of her at all, at the time. And I had to admit that to Jo. It wasn't easy. But it was the only way."

"She obviously forgave you." Matt pointed out, glancing at the large painting above the fireplace and seeing a glimmer of hope for himself.

"Yes, she did." Zed agreed. "And she never mentioned it again. But I know she never forgot it. I didn't neither. But I think that's one of the things that made us stronger."

Matt pursed his lips in thought for a second. "Did she ever _ do the same type of thing?" He asked.

"Yes and no." Zed answered. "There was a period of time that I was gone a lot from here. Buying cattle and such. I couldn't take Jo with me and I couldn't see what harm it did to leave her here on a well-stocked ranch with ranch hands to help out if need be. But Josephine disagreed. You see, there was this barn raising and dance coming up and she wanted to go to it. Well, I wasn't about to let some little old dance keep me from my work and I told her so. Boy did it ever make her mad."

He paused again for more coffee. "But I paid no heed and just went ahead on. I told her it was just the way it was." He paused and shook his head while the memory of that fight washed over him.

"Anyway," he finally continued. "While I was gone, one of my hands got hurt trying to bust a bronc and it kept him a bed for most a week. Jo, being the kind of person she was, naturally took to tending to him. And that hand, being a man with good eyesight, took to Jo. Now don't get me wrong, Marshal. Jo never done nothing more than just kiss him once, and he started that. And besides, when I come back home, she told me everything about what happened. But it still hurt some, to know my woman took some comfort in another man, while I was off working."

Matt looked down again. "You forgave her of course."

"Wasn't nothing to forgive." Zed told him. "I reckon if I'd a paid more heed to my woman than to my job, nothing would have happened. I knew she didn't want me to go, but I went anyhow, saying as how I had to."

Matt swallowed hard and finally pushed back his chair. "Uh, Mr. Holloday, I've really enjoyed talking with you, but I_ I'm kind of tired. So, if you'll forgive me, I think I'll turn in now."

"You go right ahead, Marshal." Zed nodded at him with a smile. "Have yourself a nice rest."

Matt nodded, but he knew, that would be impossible now.

TBC