Chapter 4 – Road to unknown

"Thank you"

"Huh? Did you say something?"

"I said thank you T'ing Mai. I know I've been a horrible patient. I'm very grateful of all you've done for me. I'm just… It was just easier to be quiet and think. I… I'm sorry; I should have talk to you earlier. I own that to you. You saved my life."

"It's wonderful to hear your voice again Gabrielle. I understand you, I don't know what happened to you but I know that you need time to think and it's wonderful that you took the next step in your healing process by starting to talk. If you need, you can tell me everything but I'm not pushing you. You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

Gabrielle was quiet for a few minutes. T'ing Mai sighed heavily. He hoped that he didn't push Gabrielle back to her silence.

"I don't know." She said quietly. "I mean of course I can remember what happened but it's very hard for me to even think about it. I guess I'm not ready to talk about it yet. Maybe someday…"

T'ing Mai was relieved. At least she spoke.

"Take your time. Like I said, if you don't want to, you don't have to. Um, I have to ask this, who are you feeling? Is everything okay?"

"Well, I'm fine thanks to you. Of course there is a lot pain but I can handle it. I could say I've been used to it."

There was a big moment of silence. Gabrielle didn't know what to say. She wanted to talk about it. It was like a big tumor inside her head. She wanted it away but she wasn't ready for to the surgery. She knew talking would help her but she was afraid. She didn't want that pain which came when she thought about Xena and everything what had happened before the fall.

"Well, I guess I should tell you more about our destination." Gabrielle returned from her thoughts and stared T'ing Mai. "Gabrielle I…, I hope you won't shock but I'm not able to heal your face. It's just too deep and, and I don't know what made it, I mean… it looks like the wound is infected by some poison or something like that… anyway, um… Wait, wait don't look me like that. I think I know a man who can maybe heal it. His is the best healer in the world. I mean at least the best in China. The journey to meet him will take days but… but he's the best and if someone can heal your wound it's him. Unfortunately he lives deep in the mountains so it means that you have to make a long journey here in my country. I don't know if you've ever been here before but… You know it's only for your health."

He sight after a long sentence in Greek. His native tongue was Chinese so it was very difficult to him to speak Greek. He tried to read Gabrielle's face for any advice what she was thinking. There was again a long silence before Gabrielle opened her mouth.

"Thank you. I don't care where I have to go, I just want to heal. What comes to this land, I've been here once before. I could tell you about it later. I'm just so grateful that you are helping me. It's very kind, you don't even know me."

We traveled through the countryside. The landscape was magnificent. At the beginning it was strange to travel in a stretcher but I used to it very quickly. T'ing Mai is very awesome man. He had told me stories about this country. I also love the food. It's very much different here than in Greek. The only problem is that I don't understand the language. T'ing Mai do speak Greek pretty good but I would like to speak with him with his own language. I've been thinking I should tell him. I should tell him about Xena and those events. I can control myself. I can deal my anger.

Xena made a big mistake when she just threw me down from there. I will study somewhere. I have to learn to fight and kill like she does. I need to train myself so I can beat her. I understand now what it feels to hate someone so deeply. I can now understand Xena's feeling about Cortez and Calisto's feeling about Xena as well, strange how simple hate is. I won't make any mistakes anymore. After I'm back in function I will practice and then I will defeat her.

"Have you ever heard about Xena the warrior princess?" Gabrielle asked suddenly without warning. It was the third day of travelling through the Chinese countryside.

"Sorry I wasn't awake. What did you said?"

"Xena the warrior princess or the destroyer of the nations, she got many names. Have you ever heard about her?"

"Xena the warrior princess? Of course I have heard about her. She is very popular here in China. She has become one of our great heroes after she killed that monster Ming Tieng."

"She didn't kill him. She said she left him alive."

"No, she finished the job by killing him. That monster is dead. Why are you asking about her? Do you know her?"

"Um, yes I know her and I just learned that she has lied to me once again. Great, it's just what I thought she would do. She is lying for me all the time." Gabrielle sight. The anger pushed up once again. She was rather talking to herself that to T'ing Mai.

"You want me to send a note for her. To tell that you are here? I mean if she is your friend she would be worried about you."

"NO! I mean don't. I think it's time to talk about my situation; I just can't keep it inside my head anymore. It's making me insane."

"Are you talking about what happened to you, how you hurt yourself?"

"Yes. I hope you could listen to me. This won't be easy for me."

"Wait just a minute. It's easier to sit down and talk face to face. I mean you have to lie there but… you know… I don't want you to talk me about this while I'm riding. I can see it's not easy for you so we should stop. There is a nice camping area not far from here. I you can just wait few more minutes…" T'ing Mai said. When they reached the camp he made a quick fire and sat down. He smiled and gazed Gabrielle. He was ready to listen.

"Well, you know Xena so I don't have to tell you so much about her before I begin. She is a warrior and she was my best friend. I told you earlier that I've been here in Chin once before. It happened when Xena defeat Ming Tieng. I was here with her. Okay, she told me that she didn't kill Ming Tieng but deep inside me I knew she did. Anyway, we've known each other for many seasons and I thought nothing could ever come between us. I was wrong." She made a deep sight before she continued. "Everything started in Britannia…"

She spoke hours. She told everything. She began with the events in Britannia, she told about Dahak, Hope, Calisto, Solan and eventually about the events in the Amazon village. She described her feeling about funeral fires, about the anger and hate she now carried against Xena. The last part of the story, the "fight" against Xena was the hardest one. Her voice cracked when she spoke about the fall.

"…next thing what I remember is when I woke up in the ship. I guess you remember better that I what happened after that." Gabrielle sight and gazed the stars. She hadn't even realized how long she had talked. It felt good, all the pain and the weight she had carried had gone. She felt very peaceful when she looked back to T'ing Mai's eyes. He was sunken into his thoughts. It took minutes before he talked.

"I didn't realize. I'm sorry; I can just imagine what you've been experienced. I'm sorry about everything. Thank you; I understand how much it took from you to push it out. I'm very proud of you."
"No, I'm then one who should thank you. Thank you, you listened me for hours. I'm a… a… well, it feels a lot better now. Thank you."

"I would not want to change the subject but I guess I have to, for a little moment… We haven't eaten for hours. Are you hungry because I am a little bit, you know… hungry. I mean I don't want to interrupt but…"

"It's okay and yes. I'm starving!"

"Okay. We can more about your… you know… after we've eaten something."

"Thank you once again T'ing Mai. You're a good man and your hearth is pure gold!"

End of part 4.

Thank you from your reviews. I will take Xena back to this story soon but not just yet. I'm trying to update as soon as possible.