Soapie is writing this chapter, which is the main reason it isn't funny and you can tell she tried to hard (Why must I, Soapie, be a skilled angst writer and not a good comedy writer?) Anyway, please enjoy and no flames because I can't be bothered having an internet fight.

Oh, we don't own any of the characters, Village People/YMCA or the song "Yellow Polka Dot Bikini"

"Which bowtie shall I wear?"

"What?" Kurt asked. He got dragged to Blaine's room for fashion advice and – predictably – the hair-gelled teen ignored him.

Everyone ignored Kurt Hummel, it seemed.

"Which bowtie? I got my purple striped one, the one with rubber ducks on it, the yellow polka dot -,"

"It was an itsy-bitsy, tighty-wighty, yellow polka dot bowtie-y!" Nick sang, barging into the room,

"That he wore for the first time today!" Jeff joined in; climbing in through the window, despite that Blaine's room was on the fifth floor of the Dalton building.

"An itsy-bitsy, tighty-wighty, yellow polka dot bowtie-y," Nick's voice had gotten lower, yet again scarring Kurt.

"So in the bedroom he wanted to stay!" Jeff's voice also got deeper.

"Two, three, four, stick around, we'll tell you more!" They harmonised together, wrapping each other's arms on the other one's back, their free arms (Jeff's left, Nick's right) in the air, waggling their finger in poor attempt as jazz-hands.

"Why do you do this to me?" Blaine sighed.

"We're drunk!" Jeff shouted with a giggle. Yes, a giggle. Because it was Jeff.

"Jeff's drunk. I didn't get any of the vodka." Nick glared at the boy he wanted to jump.

"David has some I think!" The blonde replied before hiccupping.

"Guys!" Kurt whined, "We need to be on top form if we're going to spy on Puck and Blaine's date tonight!"

"Wait, what?" Blaine spluttered, dropping his precious bowties in an outrage.

"Yeah, otherwise you'd make a fool out of yourself." Was the countertenor's reply.

"I'll get the moustaches!" Nick volunteered.

"I'll get the disguises!" Jeff slurred, staggering behind Nick, who seemed to be gracefully leaving the room compared to his friend.

"Why do you think I can't handle going on a date by myself?" Blaine asked, pouting, "I've been on tons of dates before."

"And look how they ended up." Kurt gave his famous bitch glare, "Plus, it's Breadstix. I'd actually like to go with you one day and I don't need you kicked out the restaurant for jumping on a table!"

"That was one time!" Blaine defended, "Jeff had given me a load of sugar. Nick had given me the Teenage Dream Deluxe Album!"

"It was during dinner! Trent was crying, you stepped in his special-made pasta sauce!" Kurt was almost hysterical. Blaine pouted even more.

"Fine. No furniture jumping. Anything else?" He asked.

"Yes. No gelling the hair. You look like a stupid gang member. From the 50's." Kurt said, picking up a bucket of water and chucking it all over him, ruining the blue shirt and bright purple jeans.

"T-that was s-s-so cold!" The soaking wet teen stammered, shivering.

"I'm not even sorry," Kurt smirked, "Put these clothes on with no bowtie and dry off. You'll look fantastic."

"Oh-ok." But, before Blaine could even move to the bathroom to change, Kurt's phone rang and he checked the Caller ID and frowned.

"It's Loudmouth Berry. I'm guessing it'll take a while. Go change and head of to Breadstix. Nick, Jeff and I will turn up not long after. Promise." And with that, Kurt left the room to answer Rachel's call, not knowing he actually gave Blaine the wrong set of clothes.

Blaine tugged at his outfit, hoping Kurt was right in the head with it looking great, but, nevertheless, he was never one in tune with fashion and he's never judged Kurt's clothing choices before and wasn't going to start now.

Nick, Jeff and Kurt were yet to arrive and last time Blaine saw Kurt was when the taller boy was in deep conversation with Rachel about whether she should go along to Brittany's house to "bling up" Lord Tubbington (honestly, he thought the guys at Dalton had weird conversations until that one) to pay attention to Blaine leaving, not even glancing at him.

And Nick and Jeff were doings God knows what so he was thankful he didn't bump into them. Though, he was worrying now as he needed all of them to make the date perfect.

"Dude, what are you wearing?" A not-so familiar face asked. Blaine looked from his phone and saw Puck, in his Titan's jersey, with his hands in his pocket, staring in disgust at Blaine's outfit.

He was wearing leather pants with a denim crotch (Blaine, not Puck), as well as a leather jacket with nothing underneath and a cop hat. A moustache was added, which seemed perfect to Blaine. Feeling nervous, he didn't answer Puck's (purely rhetorical) question and twirled the bling around his neck to distract himself for a few moments.

"Kurt told me to wear it." He muttered defensively, dropping the bling from his fingers and finding the floor extremely interesting.

"Why?" Puck asked, keeping a distance between the two boys.

"Uh, he's at one with fashion, I guess." Blaine shrugged, growing extremely warm in his leather outfit.

"Alright then, shall we go inside?" Puck asked. The curly-haired boy just nodded and followed him in.

As soon as they went through the door, a Batmobile appeared.

"Where did you even get the Batmobile from?" Kurt asked Jeff, thunderous.

"My dad knows a guy who's cousins with the friend of the guy who is drinking buddies with a prop guy who happens to know who builds movie cars." The blonde reply.

"What?" Kurt asked, not catching a single word of that.

"Connections," Nick spelt it out simply for Kurt with a sigh, "Why aren't you wearing your moustache?"

"It's bad enough were dressed as members of Village People!" He snapped.

"Hey, it was either YMCA or Elvis Presley costumes!" Nick defended.

"What about your other ones?" Jeff questioned, "You have costumes from food to Harry Potter characters!"

"The Warblers and Crawford Country Day have a lot of costume parties, leaving only two options. And Kurt, you should be grateful I gave you first pick!"

"No you didn't! Jeff picked the Indian, you picked the cowboy, and I picked the builder."

"I was going to pick that one with the cool leather pants and denim crotch but it was gone…" Jeff reminisced.

"Oh, I borrowed it for some material comparing." Kurt shrugged, "Anyway, I don't want to keep Blaine waiting so, let's get going."

And with that, Jeff put on Kurt's moustache, Nick straightened his hat and Kurt actually got out the god dammed car.

"Well? Are you coming?" He asked the other two, who quickly scrambled out the car with Jeff loudly asking for cheesecake.

The date is next. That is all.

Please review so Jeff can have his cheescake :3

- DoTheEmu