Chapter 4 Saying the Word

Edward's POV

Well it hadn't been a no, I tried to reassure myself as I sat in front of the TV with the news on, not actually watching it. I sighed and ran a hand through my hair, I felt slightly guilty- to Bella I wanted to marry her because I was the selfless best friend, but in truth, my reasons for wanting to marry her were completely selfish. I loved her and this was the cowardly way out, this was a way that I could keep my best friend and not ruin our friendship with my feelings. I couldn't tell her now, not when she was going through so much, maybe later when I could somehow make her fall in love with me too. It was because I loved her, that I wanted to help her through this situation.

My thoughts were interrupted by an urgent knock on the door and I grudgingly got up to answer it. As soon as I answered the door, my arms were immediately filled with a sobbing Bella and my heart broke all over again- I really hated to see her so miserable.

"Shh sweetheart." I tried to comfort her, scooping her into my arms and carrying her to the couch where I held her until she could speak again.

"What happened?" I asked.

"Jacob came after you left."

I had noticed how it was Jacob now instead of just Jake.

"What did he do now?" I asked angrily, hadn't he hurt her enough?

"He proposed and then got angry and bitter when I refused." She told me and my heart soared, she'd told him no.

"Does your offer still stand?" she asked me softly and I nodded.

"Always Bella, you need me and I need you."

"Then yes." She whispered softly.

I glanced down at her curiously, "Yes?"

"Yes I'll marry you Edward."

I felt like jumping up and down I was so happy, instead I settled for kissing her cheek in what I hoped was a friendly gesture.

"I just feel so guilty Edward, what about you?" she murmured.

"What about me?" I shrugged, "I want to do this for you, I want to be a dad to your baby."

She took in a shaky breath, "That's good because Jacob kind of thinks that baby is yours…" she trailed off nervously.

"That will make things so much easier Bella. Relax please, everything will work out." I reassured her with a calm smile, "I'm not going to change my mind."

She nodded, "I'm too tired to argue anymore." She told me and I sighed in relief- I didn't want her to keep pushing for the reasons I wanted to marry her so badly. I guess I could always use the excuse of being married gave me a better image in my career, but I hated not telling the direct truth.

"Do you want to stay the night? You should get used to staying here Mrs. Cullen." Her soon to be name did more to my heart than she could imagine.

Bella's sleepy eyes widened, "Are we going to have to share a bed when we're married?" she asked.

"Not if you don't feel comfortable with it." I told her, slightly disappointed but I understood- although there'd been times when we were growing up that we'd shared a bed , I knew it might feel awkward for her every night. "You can take the guest room."

She nodded, rested her head against my chest and closed her eyes. A few moments later she was asleep and I was glad. She'd been through so much these past few days and I could imagine that she wasn't sleeping all that well.

I gently picked her up and carried her to the guest room she always claimed as hers when she stayed over, tucking her into the double bed and tenderly kissing her forehead.

"Goodnight my Bella."

Bella's POV

I woke up pretty late the next morning to the smell of waffles wafting into my room from the kitchen and when I went to investigate, I found Edward readying some waffles on a plate.

He smiled widely when he saw me standing in the doorway, "Morning Bella."

"Morning." I smiled groggily back at him.

"You in the mood for some of my chocolate waffles? I made breakfast."

As if on cue, my stomach growled loudly and we both chuckled.

"I'll take that as a yes then." He said, handing me a plate.

"Thank you." I said as I sat down at the kitchen table, Edward made the best chocolate waffles.

"You're welcome. It can be a little something to get you looking forward to married life." He teased as he sat down opposite me with his own plate.

I laughed but didn't comment, I was glad the subject of our marriage could be something we could joke about- I didn't want things to get awkward and then lose my best friend.

"So what's on the agenda for today?" I asked him, "We need to tell everyone so we can get this wedding planned." Another wave of guilt hit me but I pushed it aside for now- I'd already said yes.

"Well." Edward swallowed a bite of food, "You, Isabella Swan, are spending the day here with me and we are going to do nothing but lounge around the house and watch old home videos." He grinned at me before his green eyes softened, "You need to relax Bella, stressing so much isn't good for you or the baby, everything will work out fine honey, I promise you, you're not in this alone."

I smiled appreciatively and just let myself believe him, Edward had always had a knack for knowing how to make me feel better and a day relaxing with my best friend sounded perfect. "Fine by me, as long as they're the ones embarrassing you and not me." Esme, Edward's mother, had videoed nearly every event of our lives so far- she was sentimental like that.

"That's not fair." He grinned cheekily, "I don't fall nearly as much as you do."

I mock glared at him before chuckling, he was right; I'd always been an absolute klutz.

"Can I borrow a shirt?" I asked after breakfast as I was going to take a shower, "I left a pair of sweatpants here last time I stayed but no shirt."

Edward nodded and waved a hand towards his room, "Help yourself."

I went down the hallway and into his bedroom, like the rest of his house, his room was tastefully done. I knew Esme had helped him decorate. The walls were a light blue and the room had a big window letting in the light. His huge bed was pushed against the back wall and had a cream coloured comforter that matched the carpets. His music collection was shelved and almost took over the whole side wall next to his fancy looking stereo system.

Edward had lived alone for about a year now in a stunning house on a hill overlooking a small stream- we'd often gone down there on picnics or just to hang out. The house itself was a single story but with four bedrooms big enough to hold a football team, it had a stunning lounge with several windows that let sun in on the rare occasion it was actually sunny in Forks.

I dug through his dresser, not feeling awkward about it at all. I'd often wore Edward's clothes, the scent made me feel protected and safe- Edward and I had a wonderfully comfortable friendship that people often marvelled at and girl's had been catty to me about, but I didn't mind at all, Edward was the best friend anyone could ask for.

A while later we were sitting in his cosy living room in front of the big TV that was mounted above a stone fireplace. I loved Edward's house, it was perfect for a family. Edward's grand piano was set up proudly against the back wall, he loved that instrument and had made music his life. His father, Carlisle, had always worried about it not making enough income and had wanted Edward to follow in his footsteps, but now I had a feeling Edward made more than the small town doctor as a composer.

I burst out laughing at the scene in front of me now. A five year old Alice had Edward tied to a chair and was happily painting his face with various make up items. He looked like an overgrown male Barbie. I think I'd been the one holding the camera as you could hear my giggle every now and then over Edward's mad protests.

"That wasn't funny." Edward grumbled good naturedly from next to me on the couch.

"C'mon Eddie." I teased, knowing he loathed that nickname, "You look pretty."

A cheeky crooked grin spread across his face as he turned to face me more, holding out his hands.

"Oh yeah Isabella?" I glared at him; I hated my full name as much as he hated Eddie. "At least my sister seems to have given up on me, you, however still have to put up with that." He was right; I hated it when Alice and Rosalie ganged up on me to give me a make over.

Suddenly his outstretched hands moved and he was lying half on top of me, tickling my ribs fiercely.

"Ed…ward!" I gasped through my laughter, I was ticklish practically everywhere, "Okay okay! Sto..p!" I laughed.

Edward was chuckling himself as he withdrew his hands, although he was still lying half on top of me and it was that moment that I noticed how close our faces were, and for some unknown reason, I found myself studying his lips.

Suddenly he righted himself, sitting up and clearing his throat. I blushed- a common occurrence for me.

Huh. That was weird. Edward was my best friend, where had that come from? I figured it must be my raging pregnancy hormones that made it seem like kissing him would be a good idea. After all, best friend or not, he was still the best looking man I'd ever come across.

"How about the video of the middle school dance next?" Edward said, breaking me out of my thoughts and phasing us effortlessly back into our usual playful banter. He was grinning and I groaned when I remembered the one he meant, "The one where I went with Mike Newton?" I shuddered, I'd said yes to him that one time and he was still trying to get me to go out with him again years later.

"Yip." he grinned at my distaste, I knew that Edward couldn't stand Mike either, "Maybe he'll lay off you when you're a married woman." Edward teased.

"Are you sure?" I grumbled, "He's persistent enough not to care."

Edward's jaw clenched, "Let him try." He growled making me smile softly and briefly wonder why it mattered to him so much.

"Thank you Edward. And you were right, I really needed today."

His green eyes softened as he looked at me, "Stop thanking me Bella. It's my pleasure."

I leaned across and gave him a kiss on the cheek, "Still, thank you, you won't ever know how much this means to me."

It was then that I realised how wonderful being married to Edward would be and I cemented my decision- I was going to be selfish just this once. This way I could avoid any more romantic entanglements, love was a waste of time- the stuff that happened in romance novels just never happened to me, which is why this was a good idea, as long as I had my baby and my best friend, I would be fine.

Before I knew it, it was nearing five 'o clock and I knew I had to head home to change for dinner tonight. Edward had phoned everyone to meet at his parent's house tonight for dinner and I was so nervous I felt sick- being pregnant not helping that feeling at all.

"Relax Bella. It will be fine. Everyone will be surprised but they'll be so happy. Alice will be ecstatic about a wedding to plan." Edward tried to reassure me as we drove back to my place.

I just hoped he was right.