"Tommy."
He was standing on the other side of the door. A tired and sad expression on his face, she could see that his eyes were rimmed with red, as if he had been crying. His hair was messy and stood on end, his hands were clenched in fists at his sides. She looked down and saw that a suitcase sat at his feet.
"What happened?" she asked, her voice filled with concern.
"Laurel and I broke up," he explained. "Or I broke up with her."
"Tommy, I'm so sorry," Felicity said sadly.
"Would I be able to stay here?" he asked awkwardly. "Just for a few days, a week at most, until I find a place? I know we don't really know each other, but I didn't know where else to go."
"Of course," Felicity moved out of the way, she gestured for Tommy to come inside. "You can use the spare room. Follow me."
Tommy followed, his feet dragging, as Felicity led the way through her modest town house, it was small, but full of life and colour, just like her. She opened one of the doors in the hallway.
"In here," she said. "Sorry about the mess. I don't get a lot of guests. So, I use this room as storage for some of the computers that I'm working on."
Tommy looked around the room. It was small, probably the size of his closet back at the manor. There was a double bed with a dark green comforter. A desk sat in the corner and was covered in various computer parts and wires.
"Thank you," he said, dropping his suitcase to the floor. "And I'm sorry to just barge in."
"No worries," Felicity brushed it off, she smiled. "Do you want to be alone? Or is this the sort of break up at requires chick flicks and ice cream?"
"Ice cream would be nice," Tommy chuckled. All ready feeling the effects of Felicity's bright personality. "But I might take a pass on the chick flicks."
"Okay, why don't you get settled, maybe change into some pjs, break ups usually require your most comfortable clothing and I'll grab the ice cream," Felicity offered. "We can meet in the living room."
Tommy nodded as Felicity bounced out of the room and down the hallway. He picked his suitcase up, placing it on the bed. He opened it up and pulled out a pair of old, worn sweatpants. He removed his jeans before pulling the on, then he dug through his hastily packed suitcase, finding a t-shirt to wear and he made his way back down the hallway Felicity's living room.
He had only been to her home once before. Back when he had first learned that Oliver was the vigilante, she had opened her home to him as a place to process that information; ice cream had also been involved then. As he walked down the hallway he took note of the framed pictures along the walls. There was one of a young Felicity, smiling proudly as she held up, what appeared to be some type of computer.
"You aren't really blonde," Tommy muttered in surprise, taking note of her darker hair colour.
"Hmm…" Felicity poked her head out of the kitchen. "Oh, no, I dye it… But don't tell anyone." She held her spoon out towards him in a threatening manner.
Tommy laughed, he looked at another picture, a teenage Felicity, wearing a graduation cap and gown.
"My high school grad," she supplied.
"You look so young," Tommy commented.
"Yeah, I was 16," she explained. "I graduated early."
"You really are a genius, aren't you?" Tommy asked rhetorically.
Felicity shrugged in response. "By some standards, I suppose."
Tommy shook his head, laughing lightly at her modesty as he followed her into the living room and took a seat on the couch.
"How come you don't have have family pictures?" Tommy asked curiously. "I don't mean to pry, I just noticed there's a lot of you, maybe a few of friends, but no family ones."
Felicity looked down, she twisted her fingers in her lap. "It's fine," she shrugged, still not looking up. "I just… I didn't have much of a family growing up. I was an only child. My mother… well she's my mother and my father, I don't know much about. He left when I was seven. All I really remember is that I got my love of computers from him. After he left, my mom spent most of her time working, trying to make enough money to keep a roof over our heads and keep me fed. O guess that didn't leave much time for family photos."
"Felicity, I'm so sorry," Tommy said. "I can sort of relate. My mom died when I was young, and my father… Well, I've told you a bit about him. He took off after she died. For almost two years, I think, I stayed with Oliver. And when he came back, he was a different person, cold, closed off. But, I am really sorry about your dad. We could form a club, a 'My dad sucks' club."
"It's fine," she shook her head, finally looking up from her lap. "Besides, we're not here to talk about me. What happened between you and Laurel, I thought you were happy?"
"I was, so happy," Tommy said, gladly accepting the ice cream that Felicity had offered, picking it up from the coffee table. He ate a large scoop before continuing. "I think I was just kidding myself. She doesn't feel the same. It's always going to be Oliver and Laurel. Always has been, always will be."
"Did she tell you that?" Felicity questioned, her head tilted in confusion. "Did she say that she still had feelings for Oliver?"
"She didn't have to, it's pretty obvious," Tommy said bitterly, roughing jabbing the spoon back into the bucket. "She'll always have feelings for him. Just like he'll always have feelings for her, even if he says that he can't be with her. You never forget your first love."
"I'm a little confused," Felicity admitted hesitantly. "You broke up with Laurel, even though you're still in love with her, because you think she still has feelings for Oliver."
"She does," Tommy interrupted.
"Okay. And Oliver is still in love with her, but he said that he can't be with her," Felicity tried to make sense of the information that Tommy had shared with her.
"Right, and she also has feelings for the vigilante," Tommy added. "Maybe it's more hero worship, because of the number of times he's saved her, which is a lot, but she definitely cares about him. He saved us, you know. The other night when we were at Laurel's watching Taylor. We were attacked and Oliver came bursting though the window. He had been watching, I guess, making sure we were safe. And if Laurel knew, if she knew that Oliver was also the vigilante, I'd never stand a chance."
"So, you're pulling away before you can get hurt," Felicity surmised. "Or get more hurt."
"I guess," Tommy admitted. He ate a few more bites of ice cream. "Is that so wrong?"
"No," Felicity assured him. "You're protecting yourself."
"Why do I feel like there's a but coming," Tommy said.
"But, what if you're wrong?" Felicity asked. "What if Laurel is in love with you and by pushing her away, you're only hurting the both of you more. You're ruining your chance at happiness."
"She'd never choose me," Tommy said dejectedly. "If she knew that Oliver was the vigilante, she'd choose him. She always chooses him."
"But she did choose you," Felicity cut in. "Think about it, she could have said no to you and pursued Oliver, but she didn't, she chose you. And I don't think you should give up so easily. I think, if you really love her, you should fight for her. I think you're scared and trying to take the easy way out."
Tommy shook his head, he leaned back against the couch, eating more of the ice cream that was in front of him.
"You know, if I have to keep giving you advice, I'm going to have to start charging, Merlyn," Felicity teased.
"What were you watching?" he asked, changing the subject. He was looking at the scene, still paused on the TV in front of him.
"Doctor Who," Felicity replied, she reached for the remote. "I can turn it off."
"Never heard of it."
"What?" Felicity gasped in mock outrage. "It's only one of the greatest shows of all time."
Tommy shrugged.
"Well, we'll just have to fix that." She jumped up and walked over to the rack of DVDs that stood by her TV, she pulled one out. "Normally, I'd say that you have to watch the originals, but for now, we'll start with the reboot."
She put the DVD into the player by her TV and sat back down. As the pair waited for it to start, Felicity launched into an animated description of the show's premise. Tommy tried to listen, but he found his mind drifting back to Felicity's words.
Was she right, had he given up on Laurel too easy? Had he made a mistake in breaking up with her?
"Alonzo runs the biggest underground casino in Starling City, when he's not kidnapping," Oliver said, looking at the computer screen over Felicity's shoulder.
"He looks like the type of lowlife someone would hire to kidnap Walter," Felicity said, she looked up at Oliver. "How many arrows do you think you'll have to put in him before he gives up Walter's location? Say a lot?"
"It's not that simple," Oliver admitted, nervously. "That casino has its own private army. We need to access Alonzo's computer, but without setting off any alarms."
"Looks like we're gonna need all the help we can get. It's too bad there's not someone else we could call," Felicity said pointedly, referring to Diggle leaving the team.
"That's enough," Oliver interrupted in a tired tone. "We can do this on our own."
"Well then," Felicity turned back to her computer. "Looks like someone's going gambling tonight."
Oliver shook his head. "Those guys would make me the minute I walked in there," he gestured to himself. "Oliver Queen would never be caught dead in a place like that."
"I wasn't talking about you," Felicity looked up at Oliver, her eyes wide and innocent.
"Absolutely not," Oliver refused, not even listening to her idea.
"I can count cards," Felicity said stubbornly. "It's all probability theory and mathematics, have you met me? Bottom line, I know my way around a casino."
"Felicity, I am not letting you walk —"
"Oliver," she interrupted, standing up to look him in the eye. "The reason I joined you in the first place, was to find Walter and for the first time, we have a real chance at finding him."
Oliver looked away, fighting with himself, torn between wanting to find Walter and protecting the blonde IT genius that stood in front of him.
"You have to let me do this," she looked at him, her eyes unwavering as she stood her ground.
Oliver turned back to face the computer. There was a picture of Walter on the screen, along with an article, detailing the ongoing FBI search for his step father. "All right," he said in defeat. He turned back to Felicity, his face serious. "But we do it my way."
Felicity nodded in consent. Oliver nodded his head in the direction his supplies, he walked over as Felicity followed behind. He tried to push away his worried thoughts of what could happen to his… He wasn't exactly sure what Felicity was to him. His IT specialist? His teammate? Could he call her his friend? Whatever she was, he would never forgive himself if something happened to her.
"So… That was Laurel," Felicity said casually as Oliver gathered a few items for their mission. "She's gorgeous. I mean, I knew she was, Gorgeous Laurel, but wow. I mean, she might be the prettiest person I've ever seen. It's no wonder she has…"
"Felicity?" Oliver interrupted. "I'm trying to prepare you for a dangerous undercover mission. You'll be going in there alone, I'll be over the comms, but you'll be on your own. Can you focus, please? And not talk about my ex-girlfriend?"
"Is she though, your ex-girlfriend? I… Not that it's any of my business. But I mean, are you? Still in love with her, I mean?"
"Felicity, do we really need to do this right now?" Oliver asked, he shifted uncomfortably in his seat.
"Right. Sorry. None of my business," she waved off her prying questions.
Oliver nodded in agreement, turning back to the arrows in front of him. "So, you'll go in, find a table and start playing. Try to make it obvious that you're counting, remember you want to get caught, you need to get caught to get into Alonzo's office. And we don't want this to go on all night. So, be vocal about your winning, try to draw attention to yourself."
Felicity didn't respond, her eyebrows were in concentration. "I am curious though," Felicity jumped back in. "Laurel, now that her and Tommy are broken up, are you going to get back together with her?"
"Felicity," Oliver groaned in frustration, he threw his head back.
"Sorry, I'm just curious," Felicity muttered, she looked down, fiddling with the hem of her sweater.
"If I answer your questions," Oliver offered, taking pity on the girl beside him. "Do you promise that you will focus? You need to know the plan."
"Yes," Felicity nodded firmly, perking up at the thought of having a peek into Oliver's allusive past. "I promise."
"Okay… What do you want to know?" Oliver tensed in preparation. Already dreading his choice to allow Felicity to ask questions. Mostly because he was not proud of his past, and he feared Felicity's reaction. He didn't want it to affect the opinion she held of him.
"Were you in love with Laurel before you got on the Gambit?" Felicity asked, her expression curious.
Oliver sighed heavily, he shook his head, a nervous laugh escaped his lips. "Getting right to it," he muttered.
Felicity shrugged, but not taking her question back.
"My relationship with Laurel was… complicated," Oliver explained. "I… I was a different person back then. I wasn't always faithful to her."
"Obviously, I mean you took her sister with…" Oliver cut her off with a harsh glare. She shrank back muttering an apology and mimed zipping her lips shut.
"I was rich and stupid. And girls… They wanted the money, they wanted the parties, and all other the advantages that came with having money. So, they would flirt and sometimes more, to get to that. And I let them, I enjoyed it. The attention and the fact that I could get away with it," Oliver's tone was filled with regret as he recalled his former life.
"Laurel was just always there. She usually found out about the other girls, and we would break up. But she was always there and a few weeks later, after many apologies, from my end, we would eventually get back together and I could always count on her. And I took advantage of that, which is probably one of my biggest regrets.
"Before I got on the Gambit, I had just dropped out of the fourth university I had attended. I was going nowhere fast. And Laurel… She was going places. She had just applied for law school and had all these plans, plans for herself, plans for us. She was really pushing for us to move in together, and I just… I panicked," Oliver paused and rubbed his hands over his face roughly.
Felicity didn't say anything as she waited for him to continue.
"The idea of settling down and buying a place with her, scared me, terrified me. So, I did the one thing that I knew she wouldn't be able to forgive."
"You took her sister with you," Felicity filled in quietly, a hint of disappointment in her tone.
Oliver looked at her, his eyes wide and filled with regret, he nodded solemnly. "Sara and I had been flirting and had hooked up once, and had been texting ever since, so I asked her to come with me," he looked down in shame, not wanting to see the disappointment on Felicity's face. "I knew she wouldn't say no. And I knew that once Laurel found out, she would drop the idea of us moving in together."
"And you thought that she'd forgive you again?" Felicity asked in disbelief. "That after you came back, maybe in a few weeks, she'd forgive you for sleeping with her sister, for running away with her sister, because that's what she had done every other time?"
"I'm not that person anymore, Felicity," Oliver looked at her, his eyes pleading her to believe him, to understand. "And I wasn't thinking about the after part, the consequences, I never did. I only focused on the moment. But, you have to believe me, if I could go back and fix things, I would. I would have never taken Sara on the Gambit with me. There is nothing that I regret more. But I can't go back, so I'm trying to fix it now."
Felicity nodded, considering Oliver's pleas. "So are you?" she pressed, avoiding his eyes and dreading his answer. "Still in love with her."
Oliver looked away, thinking for a moment. "Laurel gave me a picture of her before I left. And I clung to it. It was the only thing I had from home, other than my father's book, but I didn't know what it meant then. That picture was home to me. And I needed that, during the dark, cold, raining nights. She was home."
"But…" Felicity started, trying to understand. "You weren't happy with her before."
"We were happy some of the time," Oliver shrugged. "And those were the moments I focused on. And I thought that if I ever got home, I would make it up to her, fix things. I could be happy."
Felicity opened her mouth to say something, but then closed it, changing her mind, instead saying: "So, I get caught, counting cards. They'll bring me to Alonzo's office and I will plant the bug."
"Felicity?" Oliver asked, a sad and confused look on his face.
"The plan," she prompted, she looked at him, her face expressionless. "You answered my question. Thank you, by the way, for trusting me. I know that's not an easy thing for you. Now, back to the plan."
"You don't have anything to say," Oliver said in disbelief. There was a part of him that needed to hear Felicity say something, anything, to hear her say that she believed him. To say that hearing about his past, didn't change the way she saw him.
"I do," she admitted in a quiet voice. "I just don't know if it's what you want to hear."
"What?" he pressed desperately. "Tell me."
"Are you sure?" she asked carefully.
Oliver took a deep breath, bracing himself before nodding.
"I think… I think that you're in love with the idea of Laurel, more that actually being in love with her," Felicity said quickly. She paused and looked down, waiting for Oliver's reaction.
When he didn't respond, she looked up. Oliver was staring at her with a look of confusion on his face.
"What do you mean?" he finally asked after several minutes of silence.
"I think, when you were lost and alone and scared on the island… And whatever else you went through," Felicity gave him a knowing look, not believing that he had spent his five years away, only on the island. "I think you held onto the idea of Laurel, you idolized her, idolized what your relationship was, because she was your reminder of home.
"You said so yourself," Felicity continued. "That you focused on the good parts of your relationship, but you also said that you didn't have a very good relationship. How would that change once you came back? You took sister on a boat with you… And she died and you came back."
Oliver looked down, he rubbed his fingers nervously together at his side.
"And I think," Felicity said. "That there is a part of you that still dreams of that. The normalcy of having someone to go home to. And the closest you've ever come to that, was Laurel. It was easier then you knew what to expect. But you've also said that you can't be with her, because of what you do. So, if you really mean that, leading her on isn't fair. And if you don't, if you believe that you do still love her, then you have to make that decision. But, I don't think you do, love her, I mean, I don't know if you ever did."
Oliver picked up one of his arrows, running it between his fingers, he thought about what Felicity had said.
"You're not going to shoot me with that, are you?" she asked, nervously eyeing the weapon he held in his hands. "Because you asked me to tell you what I was thinking."
Oliver let out a small laugh and shook his head. "No," he reassured her, putting the arrow back on the table. "I was just thinking, you might be right."
"Of course I am. Wait, are you actually admitting that I'm right," Felicity joked. "Should I be recording this? Oliver Queen is admitting that someone else could be right."
"Haha," Oliver laughed dryly. "Now, let's focus. What's the plan again?"
"Woah," Tommy gasped.
"What?" Felicity asked, her hand flying to her face. "Is there something on my face? Caught in my teeth?"
"No, you look amazing?" Tommy complimented.
He took a minute to look her up and down, his eyes moving all around her body. The usually casually dressed IT girl was wearing a floor length red gown. Her blonde hair was free of its usual pony tail, her locks were curled and clipped to one side. She wasn't wearing her signature thick framed glasses, which caused her eyes to look bigger and a brighter blue than normal. She really looked beautiful.
"Thanks," she muttered, her cheeks flushed, uncomfortable under his gaze.
"What's with the fancy fancy?" he asked.
"Oh, this old thing," she teased, she played with the skirt. "I'm helping Oliver with a case."
"A case that requires a ball gown?" Tommy asked skeptically.
"We got a lead on Walter, a person of interest," Felicity explained. "But I couldn't hack into their network from the foundry. So, I'm going to go in and plant a bug."
"Why do I feel like there's something you aren't telling me?" Tommy asked suspiciously.
Felicity looked down nervously, fiddling with the clutch she was carrying. "It's nothing. I just have to get caught counting cards in an underground casino. They'll bring me to the office and I'll be able to plant the bug," she said in a rush.
"What?" Tommy raised his voice. "And Oliver agreed to this? What is he thinking? Are you going in alone? I've been in some of those underground casinos, they're filled with criminals."
"Oliver will be there," Felicity tried to reassure Tommy. "He'll be on comms the whole time, if anything goes wrong, he'll be right there."
Tommy shook his head, running his hands roughly through his hair. "This is insane."
"Tommy," Felicity said his name softly, putting her hand on his arm. "I'll be fine. Oliver won't let anything happen to me. I'm safe with him."
Tommy clenched his jaw, biting back his retort. "Be careful," he said and stalked passed her, into the guest room he was still using. His body was shaking with anger at the thought of Oliver willingly putting Felicity in danger.
Tommy jerked awake at the sound of Felicity's front door closing. He could hear the muffled sounds of someone shuffling around one of the other rooms. Assuming it was Felicity returning from the mission, he got out of bed and poked his head out the door.
"Sorry," Felicity said in a choked voice. "I didn't meant to wake you."
All the anger he had felt earlier in the evening evaporated at the state Felicity was now in.
Her eyes were red and tears continued to slip down her cheeks. She had taken the clip out of her hair, which now hung in messy curls around her face. Her arms were crossed at her waist, as if she was trying to hold herself together. He quickly left the bedroom, walking to her side.
"What happened?" he asked, his tone filled with concern. "Did someone hurt you?"
"No," Felicity shook her head. "Everything went according to plan. Well, the guy did hold a gun to my head, but Oliver was there."
"Then what is it?" Tommy asked. He stood anxiously in front of her. Part of him wanted to pull her into his arms and comfort her. But the other part, reminded him that he didn't know her well enough to do that. Their friendship was still new and not at the hugging stage yet. He didn't want to make her feel uncomfortable.
"Walter," she sobbed, fresh tears dripped down her cheeks. "He's dead."
At those words, Tommy ignored his reservations about hugging the girl in front of him and pulled her against his chest. Her body shuddered with sobs as she clutched to his shirt.
After a few minutes, Felicity pulled away. "Sorry," she muttered, wiping her cheeks.
"Hey, it's not everyday I can offer my shoulder for a beautiful girl to cry on," Tommy joked, trying to lighten the mood.
Felicity sighed sadly. "I'm gonna go clean up and then go to bed." She didn't wait for Tommy's reply as she wandered into her bedroom, returning moments later with a set of comfortable looking pyjamas. She didn't look at him as she walked passed him and into the washroom, closing the door behind her.
Through the closed door, Tommy heard the shower turn on. Unsure of what else he could do for Felicity, he went back into his room and tried to go back to sleep.
He woke some time later to his phone alerting him of a text message. It was from Felicity:
I didn't want to wake you. I couldn't sleep, so I'm going to check on Oliver.
Oliver.
Tommy felt a wave a guilt rush over him. He hadn't even considered how his friend, if he could still call Oliver that, might be feeling, with the news of step father.
Though initially, Oliver had rejected the idea of Walter as his step father, as time had gone on, it was obvious that he had started to enjoy having Walter around and getting to know him. Walter had been the father figure that Thea had needed. Tommy hated the thought of Thea losing another father.
Tommy lay back against the pillows. His mind was too active to sleep. He found his thoughts drifting back to Laurel and their break up.
He missed her. He missed her horrible cooking and the way she was always up at the crack of dawn, despite his attempts to cuddle, always ready to save the world. He missed her smile and her laugh. He missed the way she felt in his arms, how perfectly she fit there.
Part of him wanted to call her, wanted to show up at her door with flowers and her favourite takeout. To stand in front of her and beg for her forgiveness. To tell her how sorry he was for breaking up with her, what a mistake it had been. To tell her that he loved her.
But the other part, the louder part, reminded him of her feelings that still lingered for Oliver. The fear that if she knew that Oliver was the vigilante, that she would pick him. And Tommy would be left alone.
Then Felicity's words echoed in his ears. That if he really loved Laurel, he should fight for her. He shouldn't let his fears get in his way.
His phone vibrated, breaking him out of his thoughts. It was another message from Felicity.
Info was wrong. Found Walter. At hospital now.
Tommy sighed with relief, happy to hear the good news. He read the text message again, this time a frown crossed his face. Felicity always used full sentences and proper grammar in her messages, sometimes, even correcting his. There was something off about her message, something that made him worry, that although they had found Walter, this was far from over and something else was coming. Something much bigger.