Note: Sorry if the story seems slow. Trying to get a feel for the story. I have ideas, just piecing them together is a little tough. Hope to get some reviews. Pretty, pretty please review, with sprinkles on top (grin). Thank you.

Chapter 4: Worries and Thoughts

Venus began awakening from her slumber. A sleeping Leonardo lied beside her. She gently lifted herself out of bed so to not disturb his sleep. She had slept in his room for the night, but she wanted to get to her own room for some early meditation. So, she sneakily and quietly moved out of the room and headed towards her room. On the way, she spotted a figure sitting on the couch. Curious, she moved in for a closer inspection. After a couple of paces, she recognized the figure.

"Raphael?"

The red garbed turtle slowly turned his head towards the source of the voice. As he saw Venus, a mixture of sadness and gladness filled his very being.

"Oh. Hey Venus. What are you doing up this early?"

"I was about to ask you the same about you."

"Oh nothin'. Just couldn't sleep any longer."

"Oh, okay. You need anything?"

"No, I'm fine. Thanks V."

Venus wasn't sold on that answer. Not one bit. But she didn't want to push it, so she continued to her room. Upon entering her room, she immediately sat at her desk. She needed some time to think.

She thought about her time here. When she first arrived, she was scared and unsure as to what the future held. Her father had passed on, and a new family was discovered. Since being here, she has grown to love her new family very much.

First there was Leo. She had grown to care for him very much. He was calm and collected. They shared a bed together on some nights, but that's as far as it went. Although she cared for him, there was something inside her that prevented her from taking the next step. Was it fear? Could it even be, doubt? She couldn't put her finger on it, and until she did she would go no further. She did care for him, though.

Then there was Splinter. He was a great father figure to her. Understanding and wise, she could always count on him for a lending hand or as an ear to listen to. He reminded her so much of her father Chung I. Oh, how he missed him so much.

Donnie was a genius, pure and true. She found him to be a pacifist fighter, which she respected. She knew that sounded contradictory, but he was a thinker's fighter. Brains versus brawn. Although she did have many disagreements with him over the ramifications of science vs. magic. Why he couldn't suspend a little belief at times, she'll never understand.

Mikey was a sweet one. Although a little gross and childish for her at times, she still liked him a great deal. He was very sweet and a good friend. Definitely someone you could always count on. He's a very playful type of guy, and very easy to have a conversation with.

And then there was Raphael. She slowly looked at her notebook and pondered about her thoughts of him when she first got here. She was close to looking through them, but she quickly struck that idea out. Not now, maybe later. After a long breath, she continued with her thoughts. Raphael was a total enigma to her. He seems simple on the surface. By a quick judge, he just seemed to be the rebel, the hot head, the angry one. But with more time, she realized that wasn't true. Yes, he did get angry, especially with Leo. But she sensed something much, much more. For a while, she thought Raphael absolutely hated her. But through time, she realized that was not true. He had helped her and tried to protect her many times. There were times when she saw the gentleness and compassion beneath that thick shell of his. And she liked it, although she wished she could see that more. She wished he would open up more. For the past couple of months, she noticed Raphael treating her a lot nicer. And at times, she saw Raph's look when she was with Leo. Was that guilt? Regret? She could know for sure, by using her magic and her chi. But it wouldn't be fair or respectful to enter into another's mind without being allowed to first. Still, she wished Raph would talk to her. Very complex and fascinating to deal with. She sensed a very vigorous fight within Raphael's soul, and she saddened. These nightmares weren't helping matters. She wished she could help him out a lot more than she has. Maybe to sit with him, maybe even help him or even kiss…. Whoa, whoa, whoa! Wait a minute. What was she thinking?

She glanced again at the notebooks. 'If only Raph thought of me as much as I did back then.' Or maybe even now! Was this the thing that prevented her from taking the next step with Leo? She dismissed it, thinking that Raphael didn't think of her that way.

"Just all foolish thoughts," she sighed. "Time for meditation." And she started to relax and began.

Next up: Slash's training begins