A/N: Hello again! If you've read this far, I take it you're very interested in Luke's version of the story! And I'm glad to provide it! As always, Noah's amazing blog is available, via my girl Alex. The link is on my profile, so you should go check it out!! Seriously, makes me think Noah should be the writer, not Luke!
Disclaimer: Per usual, I own nothing except the thoughts inside Luke's head. I don't own the actors or the show….yet. Alex and I are still working out the finer details of our take-over scheme. Will keep you posted!
July 2, 2007Trying to sort out way too many problems at onceIt's been a little over a week since I suddenly developed this stupid crush on Noah. I'm still trying to put all these emotions into "Invisible Girl," and he still doesn't know I'm alive. That should make it easier; Or at least, that's what I kept telling myself. But I'm just so nervous when I'm around him now. It's like I expect him to look at me, and everything will finally click in his head, that I am 'Invisible Girl' and he's that 'wrong guy' I'm trying not to fall for. I know there's no way he'll figure it out. He doesn't even know I'm gay, unless Maddie mentioned it to him, but it's not something that comes up in normal conversation.I could hear Maddie talking about some flowers from the network that were on the desk, and I asked her to help me with the sign I was trying to hang. We'd just gotten it hung when, of course perfect timing, Noah walks in, comes up behind Maddie and puts a cowboy hat on her. They start laughing and joking about getting matching hats.I asked what the hats were for, and Noah said they were getting ready for Branson. Of course, I knew Gwen was going there to perform, and that she would invite Maddie along. They'd been friends for a long time. But I didn't know Noah was planning to go. Apparently he'd been asked to shoot some footage of the performance for Oakdale Now.So they would be going together. Maddie still seemed pretty clueless how much Noah was flirting with her, but Noah would probably enjoy this trip….Why wouldn't he? Maddie's a great girl, and he's straight.I forced a smile as I looked from one to the other. I seem to be faking smiles a lot lately.Maddie said I should come, but I shot the idea down immediately. This was exactly what I didn't need. I racked my brain for a good enough excuse, but all I could come up with was that someone needed to stay here and 'keep the home fires burning.' Noah said we needed to work on the cell phone project. We would probably have a lot of down time to work on it, and we really needed to get started.Still desperate for some kind of excuse, I said that Kim hadn't mentioned it to me, but of course Noah shot down that excuse as well, saying that she probably hadn't gotten around to it yet. He said this place could survive without us for a week. He was right; we were only interns. The station wouldn't crash and burn just cause the interns were gone for a week.I was still against the idea, then Maddie had to plant another idea in my already screwed up head. She said we could save the station money and the three of us could room together. Damnit, why'd she have to go and say that? Now I couldn't keep the idea from running through my head. The hotel rooms always had two beds. And by the general, unwritten rule, Maddie, being the only girl, would get one of the beds to herself….Somehow, I couldn't make myself see this as a bad thing.I'd be in Branson, sharing a room, as well as a bed, with Noah. I couldn't help but smile a bit. The only part that ruined this vision: he was straight and obviously liked Maddie, who would also be there. It was mostly this last thought that made me turn down the offer again. I could tell Maddie looked disappointed, and I thought Noah did too, but I tried not to look at his eyes long enough to read into what he was thinking.Noah and I were checking off the last things on the list Kim had given, and he went to check on the ice, the only thing we were missing. I watched him as he left, almost wishing I'd agreed to go to Branson with them. Maddie interrupted my thoughts, asking why I shot down the idea to Branson without even thinking about it. I told her that wasn't true. After all, I had thought about it for a moment….after she mentioned that we'd be sharing a room, anyways. She restated the same reasons they'd given me earlier as to why I should come. All the reasons except the one that had almost convinced me to come along, but that's beside the point. The point was that I wasn't about to go to Branson with them, when I could stay here by myself, and try and get over this stupid crush on Noah.Maddie said she had some ideas for the main character, but I interrupted her and said she could give them to me before they left, and I'd write while they were gone. Honestly, I probably won't use any of her ideas unless they coincide with my own. Though they didn't know it, this was like my life's story, and only I could tell it the way it should be told.She asked if I was trying to avoid her or something, but I told her it wasn't. I said the timing sucked. Which, I guess that's partly true. It's mostly the company that sucks. Surprisingly, she caught on to that part immediately, asking if it had something to do with Noah, but she was still a bit off-base, saying that she knew he'd been getting on my nerves.I cut her off before she could continue and figure out anything, saying that I had to go to the pharmacy and get some medicine home for my grandma.This whole trip was proving to be more trouble than it was worth, and I'd only just found out about it today. But maybe it will prove to be a good thing. They will leave and stay in Branson together, I can get over this crush on Noah, and when they come back, I'll have most of the storyline written for "Invisible Girl" and I will be able to be around Noah without feeling nervous and self-conscious. Now that I think about, this part of the day actually turned out better than I originally thought it had.When I got back to the farm with my grandma's prescription, I discovered the problem that ruined the rest of the day.Jade was in the kitchen when I got there, and said she'd just decided to stop by and say hi. I smiled brightly; my first real smile in about a week, I think. I started to tell her that Maddie and Noah were going to Branson while I was staying here, and that this was exactly the kind of break from Noah that I needed. It wasn't until I asked her how she thought I could deal with these self-conscious feelings when I'm around Noah, that I realized she hadn't been listening to me at all.She said she'd been listening, and when I asked her what I'd said, she gave me the vaguest description of what I'd said that was humanly possible.She started getting really annoyed, and saying that she had her own problems. So, she hadn't come by to just say hi and talk after all. She'd come by to either complain about her problems or, judging by the way she kept looking out the window, hide from someone. When she said nothing was wrong, I called her a liar and she completely freaked out.Jade started yelling out our family always telling her how messed up she is. Did she honestly believe that I thought she was messed up? She knows that out of everyone in the family I'm the one who trusts her the most. Admittedly, from the way the rest of the family acted around her, the bar wasn't set very high, but still.A knock on the door interrupted what was probably verging on an argument, and Dallas was standing there when I opened the door. I invited him in and offered to get him a drink or something, but he said he was there on official business, which was a bit odd, as he was a family friend and was hardly ever there on 'official business.' I looked suspiciously from Dallas to Jade when he said he needed to take her to the police station for questioning. So these problems of hers definitely seemed to be bigger than I first gave them credit for. I told her I'd get my mom, but Jade said didn't want her to know about this. She said it would be fine, and there was nothing to worry about.She had to be joking. No matter what she said, she knew I'd still worry anyways.My mom came downstairs a few minutes later and asked where Jade had gone. I only said that she'd left as soon as I got in. She seemed worried about Jade, and with good reason, probably.I tried to cover for her, saying that Jade was used to keeping things to herself. It might take a while for her to open up more. She asked if Jade was in trouble. Damnit, I'm horrible at lying to her. So all I managed to say was a weak, "I hope not." I told her to try not to worry though, and promised to be there for Jade if she needed me, and then left so my mom could go give grandma her medicine.My phone rang not long after I left the farm, and Jade was asking me to come to the police station. She sounded really panicky, so I told her I'd be there soon. I couldn't help wondering why she had been taken to the police station in the first place; though somehow, I wasn't sure if I wanted to know, but I had to be there for Jade.I got the station and Dallas took me back to a room where Jade was sitting down at the table, her head in her hands. She jumped up and hugged me, and started talking, but she was going so fast it was hard to make sense of it. A thought hit me, and I asked if she'd been arrested. She said not yet, but this statement didn't make me feel any better. Then she started talking about the necklace she'd lost, but I didn't see why that was relevant at all right now. I promised that I would swear to Dallas that she'd lost the necklace a while ago, though I still didn't quite get it. She said Cleo was setting her up, but that didn't make any more sense than anything else she'd said. That is, until she said that she'd been advertising online for a look-alike to take Gwen's place. Jade said they couldn't find the website, but that wasn't exactly at the top of my priorities right now. What the hell made her decide to find someone looked like Gwen? I thought she was over Will by now. But apparently she still held a grudge against Gwen.She started getting frantic, and I tried to calm her down, saying that I never said I didn't believe her. I'm not sure that I do believe her, but I couldn't say that it was hard to believe either. But I told her she needed proof, and she started talking about Cleo's diary. Apparently the diary was just short of a map out of everything that had happened since day one, and planning until how she wanted it to end.Apparently she wanted me to get Will to find the diary, but I didn't have a clue how to convince him of that. He was still angry at Jade, and with good reason considering every piece of evidence pointed to her, so he wasn't going to give me the diary so I could prove she was innocent.The best I thought I'd be able to do would be to get Dallas to give me a search warrant. SO I guess I'll try and figure that part out later.