"Although so cleverly constructed, the Clockwork man was far from perfect..."

In the Children's Literature section of The Gotham City Public Library, Harriet Cooper continued reading, the kids around her listening attentively.

"Three separate keys wound up his motion..." She blinked. "...Machinery, his speech..." She blinked again, then frowned. There was an odd speck of light on the page that kept distracting her. "...Works, and his thoughts. One or more of these contrivances was likely to run down at a critical moment, leaving poor Tiktok..." The light distracted her again. "I'm sorry, children. But I must find out where that light is coming from..."

Looking around, she realized the sun was shining through the window onto the small diorama the library staff had constructed in a corner of the room. The sunlight kept glistening off something in one of the statues' eyes...

"Just a moment..."

Putting the book down, she walked over to the diorama, a tribute to THE WIZARD OF OZ with manikins dressed as The Scarecrow, The Tin Man, and The Cowardly Lion. Plastic Halloween masks covered the manikins' faces. Looking closely, she realized one of the manikins was wearing glasses under its mask.

"How strange..."

She peeked under the mask and saw a very pale boy, moisture bubbling on his lips. Then she looked at the other two manikins and saw two more sets of eyes staring at her.

"Oh! OH! Oh, mercy!" Swallowing hard and struggling to keep calm, she turned to the children she'd been reading to. "Could you children please go find Batman or Robin or a librarian, please? There... There seems to be.. a problem..." The kids ran out of the room to search as Mrs. Cooper wrung her hands. "Oh, heavens! Oh, dear! Oh... We need a doctor, could somebody get a doctor or...?"

"Did somebody call for a doctor?"

Mrs. Cooper turned to find a blond girl in a teal lab coat, a badge hanging from a string around her neck. Doctor O climbed up onto the diorama, removed the masks from the paralyzed boys' faces, and examined them closely.

"These agents have been struck with pellets treated with an extract from the rare Rasmintine berry found only in parts of South Africa, Paraguay, and Scotland!" She dug in the pockets of her lab coat. "There's not a moment to lose!"

Bewildered, Mrs. Cooper fled. "Batman! Oh, Batman!"

#

"A priceless boa made from hand-dyed egret feathers coated with diamonds..." Commissioner Gordon pondered. "Why would The Joker and Odd Todd want such a thing?"

"Yeah," Oscar pondered. "Neither one of them really seems like the type..." He pondered some more. "Well, maybe The Joker... You guys know him better'n I do, though, so..." He blinked. "What were we talking about?"

Ms. O interrupted before Commissioner Gordon or Chief O'Hara could kill him. "It probably involves the spellbook The Joker stole earlier. They're gathering the ingredients necessary to cast one of the spells."

"Of course!" The Commissioner nodded. "But which one?"

"And where does the stolen piggy bank figure into it?" Chief O'Hara added.

"The piggy bank's easy," Ms. O explained. "Alchemists and sorcerers frequently used gold to test their spells."

Oscar looked at her. "They DID?"

"Ssh! If the formula they'd concocted transformed the gold into lead, they knew it worked," Ms. O paused while Oscar tried to figure that one out. The Commissioner and the Police Chief nodded as if they understood. "As for which spell... Well, that's the tricky part. "

#

"HEEHAHAHAHA! The poor fools are completely baffled!" The Joker danced about clapping his hands, then turned back to the television where the four's discussion was being broadcast. "Good work, Delilah! The tiny camera and microphone you planted in the Commissioner's office are both working perfectly!" Delilah primped. "We can see and hear every move Gordon and his playmates make!"

"Every move they make, sure," Odd Todd scowled. "But what about Batman and Robin?"

"Oh, those two! Pfah! Let me worry about them! You just get back to planning our next crime!"

Odd Todd resumed scribbling notes, skimming the Yellow Pages of the Gotham City Telephone Directory, and staring at the list on the blackboard. Nearby, his three henchmen were busy stripping diamonds off egret feathers.

"Oo!" Selene leaned closer to the television. "Who's the guy in the white coat and the bowtie? He's cute!"

Todd glared at her. "What?"

Selene smiled quickly. "B-But not as cute as you, Toddy!"

"Just you remember that," he growled.

#

Everyone on both sides of the screen were startled when Batman, Robin, Otto, Olive, Barbara Gordon, and Doctor O burst into the office carrying the still-recovering Oren, Owen, an Olaf.

"B-Batman! What in the..."

"It's a long story, Commissioner," Batman set the still slumbering Olaf on the couch. "And almost a tragic one. But thanks to this young lady here, these three Odd Squad agents will be all right!"

"The Joker drugged them with the same poison he gave me, Daddy," Barbara Gordon explained, setting Oren on the other side of the couch. "If Doctor O hadn't shown up, I hate to think what might have happened!"

"Curses!" The Joker hissed. "A perfectly precious pie-eyed prank gone awry due to some cookie in a doctor's coat! Well, we'll get them next time!"

Back in the office, Gordon was still trying to puzzle it all out. "Doctor...?"

Doctor O went over to him, shaking his hand. "Yes. I'm Doctor O. I'm a doctor."

"You're a... What?"

"No. I'm a doctor."

"She gave these boys some sort of universal antidote and saved their lives!" Robin plopped Owen into a chair.

"All in a day's work. Fortunately, I had some Universal Odd Squad Antidote on hand."

"It's just like the Universal Bat-Antidote!" Robin exclaimed.

"Yes. Only with a delicious cherry taste." Doctor O felt Owen's forehead and took his pulse. "They're recovering nicely."

"It's a good thing for them you happened to be in town!" Barbara Gordon smiled.

"Yeah," Otto raised an eyebrow. "Why were in town anyway?"

"Total coincidence," Doctor O responded, now checking Oren's heartbeat. "I'm visiting over the weekend for my cousin's Bat Mitzvah."

"How... apropos..." Batman half-grinned. "And you happened to visit the library..."

"No. I was there for storytime. I love the works of L. Frank Baum." She turned to look straight into an imaginary camera. "They're American Fables." She nodded and resumed her work.

"Yes. Well, goodbye Daddy," Barbara kissed her father on the cheek. "This is more than enough excitement for one day! I'm going straight home, taking the phone off the hook, and having a long, relaxing bubble bath!"

"Goodbye, Barbara!" He waved as the young librarian left. "I'm so glad she'll out of danger! Things like this always worry a father!"

Oscar sighed wistfully. "Y'know, it's been ages since I've had a nice bubble bath..."

Batman did a double take. "Oscar?"

Otto did a double take at Batman's double take. "You know him?"

Oscar shrugged. "We've worked together a couple times. He... doesn't like to talk about it for some reason." Otto gazed at the little scientist with new respect as Oscar shook Batman's hand. "Glad to see you again, sir. Been awhile since the Case of The Parallel Pitchforks."

"Um, yes," Batman nodded politely. "Thank you. Now," he briskly changed the subject. "Down to cases. What will The Joker and Odd Todd's next move be?"

The Joker grinned. "I've got a wonderfully whimsical idea. Let's let them decide."

Odd Todd blinked. "What?"

The Joker laughed and clapped. "Instead of planning it out ourselves, let's leave it to them! Then we'll pull the very job they've concocted right under their very noses!"

"But... But..." Seeing The Joker's mind was made up, Odd Todd sighed and resigned himself.

Olive, meanwhile, was pondering. "What puzzles me is why they'd bother to steal the feather boa in the first place. If they wanted egret feathers, why not just buy them somewhere?"

One of Odd Todd's goons picked another diamond off a feather, dropping it in an old coffee can with the others. "Yeah. That's what I was wondering..." Odd Todd shushed him.

Batman grimaced. "The Joker, like many other arch-criminals of his ilk, suffers from an inflated sense of entitlement."

"It's not fun enough for him just to buy stuff!" Robin added. "He has to show how smart he thinks he is by stealing it!"

"How smart I think I am?" The Joker reared back. "I was smart enough to get that feather boa!"

"Correction," Odd Todd leaned forward. "I was smart enough to get that feather boa."

"Of course, Toddy. You were..." The Joker tried to pat Odd Todd on the head, only to have Odd Todd bark at him. He recoiled in surprise.

"Don't. Touch. The. Hair."

"Of course, Odd Todd," The Joker grimaced. "Of course. Must've taken you hours to get it like that."

"Look who's talking," Odd Todd responded. "We can see your mustache under that gunk, you know that, don't you?"

"Well, never mind about that," The Joker gestured at the television. "They're talking again..."

Selene sighed, gazing at the television. "Those eyes... Like two little chocolate drops on a white tablecloth..." Fortunately, no one heard her.

#

Meanwhile, Barbara Gordon had managed in a ridiculously short space of time to return home. She put away her purse and fed her pet parakeet, Charlie.

"Y'know, Charlie, I hate lying to Daddy about these things." She took the phone off the hook. "But a bubble bath's just going to have to wait. I've got a feeling this case calls for some assistance from Batgirl!"

Crossing the room, she activated the secret panel in the wall of her apartment, which spun around to reveal her purple and yellow costume, red wig, and changing mirror.

#

"We know The duo's objective," Batman pontificated. "To collect the ingredients for a magic potion from the spellbook they stole."

"Yeah!" Robin rejoined. "But which potion?"

"Yes, that's the problem. If only we had a copy of the book ourselves..."

Ms. O jumped to her feet. "Oh, that's easy!" She turned to her agents, Otto, Olive, and Oscar. "Everyone grab an adult. We need to go to the Mathroom!"

Commissioner Gordon looked down at Ms. O as she seized his arms. "Young lady, if you have to go, I'll get my secretary Bonnie to..."

Once the Agents had their partners, they twisted their badges and spun en masse, taking the adults with them until they all vanished in flashes of light.

The Joker's jaw dropped. "Wha... Where'd they go?"

Sighing, Odd Todd walked over and changed channels on the TV. The picture changed to show Batman, Olive, Otto, Robin, Oscar, Chief O'Hara, Commissioner Gordon and Ms. O materializing in the strange, abstract world of the Mathroom.

"I thought they might try something like this!" Odd Todd sneered smugly.

"Wha...Wha...?" The Commissioner looked around in shock. "Where are we?"

Chief O'Hara backed away from Oscar in horror. "It's... It's witchcraft, it is! You're the Devil himself!"

"I'm... I'm not..." Oscar looked crestfallen. "I'm not. Why do people always say that?"

"I... There, there, lad, I'm sorry." He put his arm around Oscar. "I didn't mean anything by it..."

"But why do people always say that?"

"A-hum!" Ms. O glared at everyone until she had their attention. "Back to the matter at hand. Mathroom!"

"Hello, Ms. O!" a voice responded seemingly from nowhere.

"Holy phantasmagoria!" Robin whispered.

"Show us all the spells listed in the Lost Spellbook of Marie LaVeau!"

"Showing spells..."

Picture after picture appeared in the air around them, holographic images of pages from the book.

"Now eliminate all the spells that don't include egret feathers!"

"Eliminating..."

Several images vanished, the remaining pictures rearranging themselves into a tighter formation. The group looked around them.

Otto shook his head. "That doesn't narrow it down that much..."

"But it's a start! Mathroom!" Batman stepped forward. "Could you tell us if there are any ingredients common to all or most of the remaining potions?"

"Certainly, Batman! It's an honor to help the Darknight Detective!" The Mathroom scanned the pictures, highlighting lines on each page. "All of the potions have as ingredients sugar, salt, and rum."

Commissioner Gordon pondered. "Sugar..."

Robin pondered. "Salt..."

Chief O'Hara pondered. "And rum? Sounds like a cake mix!"

"Of course!" Batman snapped his gloved fingers. "The Lotus Mahai Temple Restaurant and Tiki Bar in Gotham Square! It's world-renowned for its Pineapple Rum Cake!"

"So what are we waiting for?" Robin gestured. "Let's go!"

"Yes, let's..." Batman turned to Ms. O. "Could you get us back to the Commissioner's office, please?"

Ms. O nodded. She and her agents took the adults' arms again.

#

"OOOOHOOOHOOO, yes! Yes, glorious! Three essential ingredients in one caper!" The Joker laughed, then glared at Odd Todd. "And we'll have to have them sooner or later so we'll get them now!"

"All right, all right!" Odd Todd rose from his chair, collecting his things. "But if you don't mind, let's complicate matters a little for them."

The Joker giggled. "Ooooh Todd, you're definitely playing my song! What do you have in mind?"

#