Megan's default chapter.
* On quidditch field *
"Where's Professor Tim?" Megan asked.
"I don't know. He better come soon." Jo said. "He's really cool and scary and funny and-"
"I hear he used to be part of the underwater wizard league." Katie told them, looking for him.
Professor Collicut strutted onto the field.
"Alright girls, get in your lines." He told them. "We're going to stretch now."
"What happened to Professor Tim?" Megan cried, and had a nervous break down on the field.
"I heard he was sick." Professor Collicut said, grinning evilly. "Mariana Jonesy of course, never gets sick."
"Who's Mariana Jonsey?" The stupid first year in the fourth year class asked.
"Mow would be proud!" Rom said as he painted his broomstick purple and ripped off his shirt, revealing a purple tattoo of Mow.
"Put your shirt back on!" Professor Collicut ordered. "Actually, keep it off."
"But who is Mariana Jonesy?" The REALLY stupid first year asked.
"SHUT UP!" Everyone else yelled, but it was too late, Professor Collicut had begun a 3 hour monologue on the subject of Mariana, which all the 4th years had heard a million times.
"Why is Tim sick so often?" Katie whispered to Jo.
"I don't know. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that Mr. Collicut walks by Tim's door every morning wearing nothing but his rugby shirt."
"Bad bad bad images!" Katie said, pounding her head against the ground. Professor Collicut failed to notice, as he was practically having orgasms thinking about Mariana Jonesy.
Megan was giving Neville a back massage, and Neville, who had never touched a female before, passed out.
Ron was the only person who was not bored, as he was busy tattooing Mow on Collicut's leg when the Professor wasn't looking.
Megan, realizing Neville had passed out, began looking for the nearest murder weapon to use against Professor Collicut. The nearest inanimate object just happened to be Neville.
"Neville, do you mind if I use you to kill Professor Collicut?"
Neville made an indistinguishable sound, which Megan took for a yes. Megan grabbed Neville by the legs and throw him with all her force at Collicut. Unfortunately, Megan was not very strong so all she succeeded in doing was tossing Neville about three feet forward.
"Bad Mental Images!!! Bad Mental Images!!!" Katie was still banging her head against the ground. Oblivious to all
"Mariana won the gold in the . . ." Collicut was still ranting about Mariana. Oblivious to All.
Jo stood on Harry's shoulders, lighting the quittich hoops on fire, oblivious to all.
"Jo?" Megan asked. "Will you come with me to get my catapult?"
"Okay." Jo replied, and Megan and Joanna skipped off into the forest. Well, technically Megan and Harry skipped off, as Joanna was still seated on Harry's shoulders.
Lissie was climbing the tower where Professor Spike's room was, trying to catch a glimpse of him. Oblivious to all.
Megan wheeled her hidden catapult out of the Forbidden Forest.
The really stupid first year in the fourth year class was avidly listening to Professor Collicut's stories about Mariana Jonsey. Oblivious to all.
"Joanna, do you have any weapons?" Megan asked, once she had set up the catapult.
"I have a flame thrower in my pants." Jo said.
"You're not wearing any pants." Harry reminded her with a smirk.
"That's right!" Jo said. "But that means . . . I don't have a flame thrower!" She fell off Harry's shoulders in shock. She frantically checked both her skirt and blazer pockets, searching for her flamethrower.
"Jo!" Megan cried. "Your shoe's on fire!"
"That's where it is!" Jo said with delight, puling the flamethrower out of her shoe.
"Hmm . . . " Megan said. "What else do you have?"
Jo pulled out a pistol, 7 machetes, 4 grenades, 3 shiny, bright axes, 8 assassins knives, 2 be be guns, a Swiss army knife, a mace with poisonous nails, and one freakin' shark with a freakin' laser beam attached to it's freakin' head. "Hey!" Jo cried. "Who stole my sharp and pointy pencil of doom?"
*Flash to Professor Spike throwing a sharp and pointy pencil of doom at the approaching Lissie who was climbing through his window. Oblivious to all. *
"And finally . . . " Jo pulled a rubber ducky out of her shoe.
"Jo!" Megan cried. "Don't get caught with that, you could get in trouble!"
Megan surveyed the wide array of weapons and sharp pointy objects surrounding her, and tried to make a decision.
Finally, she grabbed the still unconscious Neville and put him in the catapult, sending him flying across the quittich field towards Professor Collicut.
Neville hit the Professor, knocking him to the ground.
"You're trying to steal my boyfriend!" Buffy cried, knocking Neville off Professor Collicut. "You cheated on me, you bastard!" Buffy yelled at Professor Collicut, and staked him.
Katie regains consciousness after banging head on floor. "Professor Collicut and Buffy? That is SO not right!" Katie began banging her head repeatedly against edge of castle.
"DIE!!!!!!!!!" Yelled Megan, running at Buffy while wielding the rubber ducky of death and destruction.
"Not a rubber Ducky!!!!" Buffy screamed in horrors and started sucking her thumb in fetal position.
"YES!" Everyone cried, "A RUBBER DUCKEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
~~~***~~~***~~~ ~~~***~~~***~~~ ~~~***~~~***~~~ ~~~***~~~***~~~
* On quidditch field *
"Where's Professor Tim?" Megan asked.
"I don't know. He better come soon." Jo said. "He's really cool and scary and funny and-"
"I hear he used to be part of the underwater wizard league." Katie told them, looking for him.
Professor Collicut strutted onto the field.
"Alright girls, get in your lines." He told them. "We're going to stretch now."
"What happened to Professor Tim?" Megan cried, and had a nervous break down on the field.
"I heard he was sick." Professor Collicut said, grinning evilly. "Mariana Jonesy of course, never gets sick."
"Who's Mariana Jonsey?" The stupid first year in the fourth year class asked.
"Mow would be proud!" Rom said as he painted his broomstick purple and ripped off his shirt, revealing a purple tattoo of Mow.
"Put your shirt back on!" Professor Collicut ordered. "Actually, keep it off."
"But who is Mariana Jonesy?" The REALLY stupid first year asked.
"SHUT UP!" Everyone else yelled, but it was too late, Professor Collicut had begun a 3 hour monologue on the subject of Mariana, which all the 4th years had heard a million times.
"Why is Tim sick so often?" Katie whispered to Jo.
"I don't know. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that Mr. Collicut walks by Tim's door every morning wearing nothing but his rugby shirt."
"Bad bad bad images!" Katie said, pounding her head against the ground. Professor Collicut failed to notice, as he was practically having orgasms thinking about Mariana Jonesy.
Megan was giving Neville a back massage, and Neville, who had never touched a female before, passed out.
Ron was the only person who was not bored, as he was busy tattooing Mow on Collicut's leg when the Professor wasn't looking.
Megan, realizing Neville had passed out, began looking for the nearest murder weapon to use against Professor Collicut. The nearest inanimate object just happened to be Neville.
"Neville, do you mind if I use you to kill Professor Collicut?"
Neville made an indistinguishable sound, which Megan took for a yes. Megan grabbed Neville by the legs and throw him with all her force at Collicut. Unfortunately, Megan was not very strong so all she succeeded in doing was tossing Neville about three feet forward.
"Bad Mental Images!!! Bad Mental Images!!!" Katie was still banging her head against the ground. Oblivious to all
"Mariana won the gold in the . . ." Collicut was still ranting about Mariana. Oblivious to All.
Jo stood on Harry's shoulders, lighting the quittich hoops on fire, oblivious to all.
"Jo?" Megan asked. "Will you come with me to get my catapult?"
"Okay." Jo replied, and Megan and Joanna skipped off into the forest. Well, technically Megan and Harry skipped off, as Joanna was still seated on Harry's shoulders.
Lissie was climbing the tower where Professor Spike's room was, trying to catch a glimpse of him. Oblivious to all.
Megan wheeled her hidden catapult out of the Forbidden Forest.
The really stupid first year in the fourth year class was avidly listening to Professor Collicut's stories about Mariana Jonsey. Oblivious to all.
"Joanna, do you have any weapons?" Megan asked, once she had set up the catapult.
"I have a flame thrower in my pants." Jo said.
"You're not wearing any pants." Harry reminded her with a smirk.
"That's right!" Jo said. "But that means . . . I don't have a flame thrower!" She fell off Harry's shoulders in shock. She frantically checked both her skirt and blazer pockets, searching for her flamethrower.
"Jo!" Megan cried. "Your shoe's on fire!"
"That's where it is!" Jo said with delight, puling the flamethrower out of her shoe.
"Hmm . . . " Megan said. "What else do you have?"
Jo pulled out a pistol, 7 machetes, 4 grenades, 3 shiny, bright axes, 8 assassins knives, 2 be be guns, a Swiss army knife, a mace with poisonous nails, and one freakin' shark with a freakin' laser beam attached to it's freakin' head. "Hey!" Jo cried. "Who stole my sharp and pointy pencil of doom?"
*Flash to Professor Spike throwing a sharp and pointy pencil of doom at the approaching Lissie who was climbing through his window. Oblivious to all. *
"And finally . . . " Jo pulled a rubber ducky out of her shoe.
"Jo!" Megan cried. "Don't get caught with that, you could get in trouble!"
Megan surveyed the wide array of weapons and sharp pointy objects surrounding her, and tried to make a decision.
Finally, she grabbed the still unconscious Neville and put him in the catapult, sending him flying across the quittich field towards Professor Collicut.
Neville hit the Professor, knocking him to the ground.
"You're trying to steal my boyfriend!" Buffy cried, knocking Neville off Professor Collicut. "You cheated on me, you bastard!" Buffy yelled at Professor Collicut, and staked him.
Katie regains consciousness after banging head on floor. "Professor Collicut and Buffy? That is SO not right!" Katie began banging her head repeatedly against edge of castle.
"DIE!!!!!!!!!" Yelled Megan, running at Buffy while wielding the rubber ducky of death and destruction.
"Not a rubber Ducky!!!!" Buffy screamed in horrors and started sucking her thumb in fetal position.
"YES!" Everyone cried, "A RUBBER DUCKEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
~~~***~~~***~~~ ~~~***~~~***~~~ ~~~***~~~***~~~ ~~~***~~~***~~~