Remembering (Part 4) - Confessions

Synopsis: There something Jack needs to tell the Doctor about their search.
Characters: Jack, the Doctor (ten)
Episode/Spoilers: Anything up to Doomsday, vague spoilers for series 3 and Torchwood.
Rating: PG (a bit of language and a little slashy UST, nothing big though)

The TARDIS shuddered and shook as she entered the vortex. "Push the blue button and then hold the green one down," the Doctor told Jack, as he ran round the console, trying to keep the TARDIS on course.

Jack did as he was told. "Stupid design if you don't mind me saying. Wouldn't it make more sense to have all the controls together in a line?"

"Probably," the Doctor agreed as he used what to Jack looked like a bicycle tyre pump. "She's supposed to have more than one pilot. Okay, should be fine for a while," he said as the ride leveled out and became smooth.

"How long 'til we get there?" Jack asked.

"Four hours, maybe, possibly a little longer." The Doctor stroked the console. "I don't think she's feeling well."

"I chose the most unreliable ship in the universe didn't I?" Jack joked. "Tell me something, if no one else can fly her, what happens to me if something happens to you?"

"You'll be stuck, so you'd better look after me."

"I can do that," Jack told him. "Four hours you say, plenty time for me to look after you right now," he grinned cheeky.

"One track mind," the Doctor replied.

"Can't blame a guy for trying. I guess if you're turning me down then I may as well go and get some food."

As Jack closed the fridge door, the TARDIS jolted violently and sent him flying across the kitchen. He was stunned for a moment, but then he scrambled to his feet and ran through the corridors to the console room. Every few seconds the ship lurched again and he was thrown against a wall.

When he reached the console room, he found it full of smoke with the time rotor making a sound he hadn't heard it make before. "Doctor," he called, but got no reply. As the smoke cleared he found the Doctor lying on one of the platforms. "Doctor, you okay? Doctor!"

The Doctor could hear someone calling him, a long way off but getting closer. He felt like he was falling, falling through time, dying. No, not dying. Slowly the fog in his head started to clear and he sensed what was happening to his ship. His eyes shot open and he sat up. "We're loosing the vortex." When he went to stand the world started spinning and he closed his eyes again.

"You hit your head and you have a pretty bad burn to your hand. Let me see," Jack said.

"No time." The Doctor tried to stand again, this time successfully, and made his way down the scaffolding to the time rotor. "This isn't good." He turned some dials and pressed a button. "Definitely not good. This is going to be bumpy."

"Going to be bumpy?"

"Bumpier," the Doctor amended as he flicked a switched and ran around the console. He made some adjustments, turned another dial and pressed a button. "Hold on!" he told Jack.

With that the TARDIS started to fall. The sensation reminded Jack of a fairground ride he'd once been on with Rose, appropriately named Oblivion. Suddenly they stopped and both the Doctor and Jack were thrown against the walls with sickening thuds.

"Christ!" Jack complained. "Why don't we have seat belts?"

"Seat belts are for wimps," the Doctor told him as he stood up and went over to the console. He examined the systems, checked the monitor and, to Jack's amusement, placed a hand affectionately on the time rotor. "Well we're back on Earth."

"What is it with your ship and Earth?" Jack asked. "When, where?"

"Cumbria... 1988. You hurt?"

"No, but you are." Jack joined the Doctor at the console and took hold of his hand.

The Doctor raised an eyebrow and smirked, "Is this really the time?"

"You burnt it, it looks painful."

"It is. Little tip, Jack. Never, under any circumstances, touch the end of a bare wire with a screwdriver, not even a sonic one."

"I'll bear that in mind. Come on, medical bay."

"I need to start repairs and to find out what happened."

"You touched a bare wire..."

"To the ship and the vortex."

"Your hand and head first, then we'll get some food, then we'll start repairs."

The Doctor let Jack lead him to the medical bay. He sat on a bed while Jack routed around looking for some ointment.

"Third drawer down," the Doctor said.

Jack opened the drawer. "What am I looking for?"

The Doctor jumped off the bed and went over to the cabinet. He took a sonic scanner out of the drawer and ran it over the burn on his hand, flinching a little as the wound was sterilised. He changed the setting and repeated the procedure, this time the scanner soothed the burn and eased the pain.

"That's neat. More Time Lord tech?"

"Human medicine doesn't agree with me. In fact I'm allergic to most of it."

"Do you have a spare one?"

"Doesn't work on Humans. I'm going to check the TARDIS is alright."

After finding that nothing in the kitchen was working, Jack gave up the idea of food and went to the console room. "How is she?" he asked. "I'm guessing not well, since none of the electrics are working in the kitchen."

"She's healing herself. She'll be alright in a few hours."

"Do you know what happened?"

"The vortex spat us out." The Doctor studied the console monitor. "The time's too close to when I was last there. Wouldn't normally matter, but with what was happening then... I don't think we're going to be able to do this."

"You're not just saying that?" Jack asked suspiciously.

"Yes." the Doctor snapped. "I deliberately crashed my ship because I didn't like to say no to you. Here," he turned the monitor to Jack, "you seem to have developed a skill for reading Gallifreyan."

Jack tried to read the information on the screen, actually understood enough of it to get the idea. They couldn't get to Arcadia, not when they needed to. "Okay. So what now?" he suddenly felt dejected.

"We need a new plan," the Doctor told him. "We might as well go and find somewhere to eat while she starts repairs."

Twenty minutes later, they were sitting at a corner table in a small café, plates of egg, chips and beans in front of them, neither speaking. Jack was stirring cream into a cup of coffee, the Doctor was eating chips with his fingers and staring out of the window at the wet countryside.

Jack had something he'd been meaning to tell the Doctor since they began this quest, something that he wasn't sure the Doctor would want to hear. Especially given the events of the last couple of hours.

The Doctor was trying to formulate a new plan. He was also trying to work out why the Time Agency, who officially denied the existence of the Time Lords, would send one of their agents to Gallifrey's system. Did the Agency send Jack, or had he chosen to go on his own?

Jack broke the silence. "I was thinking, why was I there?"

"I was wondering that."

"Did the records not show it?"

"Not the recoverable parts, no. You have no idea?"

"I've been trying to work it out, all I can come up with is that I was chasing someone, which is pretty obvious I guess. Either that, or something went wrong with my ship and I was there by mistake. Don't suppose you have new plan?"

"Not yet."

"Couldn't we try again?" Jack asked, even though he knew the answer.

"No."

"What about if we aimed for a few days earlier and waited?"

"No," the Doctor repeated. "I won't put the TARDIS through that again."

"No," Jack agreed. He ate some of his food and stirred his coffee again. "There is something I've been meaning to mention. It might be nothing, but it's probably something."

The Doctor ate a chip he'd just dunked into his fried egg and watched Jack expectantly.

"Back on the Game Station, when we saw the Dalek fleet, I recognised them immediately," Jack said. "But... I'd never actually come face to face with a Dalek before, let alone seen any of their ships. Yet I recognised them. At the time, well we were so busy I didn't really think about it, but now... How did I know what they were?"

The Doctor didn't speak. He had been watching Jack, but now he looked away, stared back out of the window.

"How did I know?" Jack asked again.

"You know the answer to that," the Doctor replied and turned back to face Jack. "Why didn't you say anything when we started this?"

"Because I didn't want you to look at me like that."

"You didn't want me to refuse to help."

Jack nodded. "I saw the effect the Daleks had on you back on the station." If Jack had had any lingering doubts that the man before him was the same Doctor he'd met during the blitz, the look in his eyes now would have removed them. It was the same look he'd had on the Game Station, defiant, angry and hurt.

"I'm sorry," Jack said. "I shouldn't have involved you and if I'd had any other choice... I've been trying to solve this on my own for years. I can't do it, not without you."

"No pressure then," the Doctor said. This time though, Jack thought he could hear a hint of resigned irony in his voice. The Doctor sighed and rubbed the back of his head. "I suppose we need a new plan."

"You'll still help?"

"I'm going back to the TARDIS, see how she is. Oh, I don't have any money, so this would be yours." He handed Jack the bill, stood up and left the café.

While Jack paid the bill, the Doctor walked back through the rain to the village green where he'd left the TARDIS. He knew she wasn't ready yet, she'd need another few hours, but he had a sudden need to be with her. His ship, his constant companion through everything for over 900 years, the only place he'd ever felt truly safe. And at the moment he needed to feel safe, because he only had one plan left to help Jack and it wasn't something he relished the thought of. The trouble was, now he needed to know why Jack had been on Arcadia almost as much as Jack did.

End Of Part 4

Part 5, Scattered Pictures...