"Ow! Careful with those, they're sharp!"
What the hell...?
"Stop acting like an idiot Sasuke and I wouldn't have to cuff you in the ass."
Where are they?!
"Knock it off you two and climb."
Climb? Than that means that they are-!
Kakashi bolted to the side of the roof and peeked over. Wall. Wall. Genin. Wall... wait! Back up! He zoomed in on the three genin that apparently had the balls the size of the sun made of poorly crafted chakra metal to climb the wall with ashiko on their hands and feet. Nothing else. Naruto was in the lead with Sasuke behind him and Sakura a little bit underneath Sasuke. They had made good progress the whole time that they were arguing and even better progress for the fact that they had to start on the second floor and the roof was two floors above the window. Naruto looked up and saw Kakashi staring at them. Naruto did a very good imitation of an anime sweat drop and blinked at him. Twice.
"Guys, we've been had."
That shut Sasuke and Sakura up. They looked upwards and also blinked at Kakashi and then they resumed climbing like it was nothing wrong with being had. They made it with a minute to spare, which they used to straighten each other up. When the time was up, they were parked in front of the bench that Kakashi tried to get settled in before he realized that his new cute little genin were ballsy. They stared at him expectantly. He stared back. This went on for two minutes and Kakashi swore that they didn't blink once.
"Ok... Share your name, likes, dislike, hobbies and dreams," Kakashi said "So we can get to know each other better."
"Why don't you go first Sensei?" Sakura asked in either a cutesy or sing-song voice. Kakashi just couldn't decide.
"Ok. My name is Kakashi Hatake. My likes are too adult for you guys, my dislikes are also too adult for you guys. My hobbies, again too adult and my dreams are unimportant," Kakashi swore that all three of them pouted, "Pinkie, you first."
"My name is Sakura Haruno. I like training, medical ninjutsu, chocolate-or any- cake, vodka, Naruto, Sasuke, my axe Matador and bulls. Oh! And Naruto's cooking. My dislikes are late people, porn, assholes, and people who base everything off of either rumors or first impressions. Also people giving missions due to gender. My hobbies are training, dancing and reading-anything really but mostly reports or Intel- plus helping Naruto around the house. And my dreams are to make Naruto Hokage and be the best medic in the world. Plus be a Saanin"
Kakashi blinked. Well, he did not expect that. He expected her to be obsessed with the Uchiha. There goes the weakest link theory.
"You next duck-butt," Sasuke's forehead vein popped out while Naruto and Sakura let out peals of laughter.
"I am Sasuke Uchiha. I like training, taijutsu, lamb-especially Naruto's lamb-, tequila, Naruto, Sakura, Naruto's cooking, my katana Flamina and phoenixes. I dislike perverts, porn, rumors, late people, revenge and assholes. My hobbies include training, singing, meditating and helping Naruto around the house and my dream is to ensure that Naruto becomes Hokage and to be a Saanin."
Kakashi blinked a second time. Wait, what was that flying away? Oh that was the 'Sasuke was an arrogant ass that needed teamwork exercises' theory. Hopefully, Naruto was a little normal but judging by the outfit he had on, likely not.
"My name is Naruto Uzumaki," Oh look, no incentive needed, "I like training, fuinjutsu, bukijutsu, Sasuke, Sakura, Kyuu-chan, cooking, cleaning, tending the house, my clawed gloves Natsumi and Tundara, wine-white, rose, red; whatever- and foxes. My dislikes are perverts, porn, cooked veggies, rumors and assholes. My hobbies consist of cooking, cleaning, gardening, tending the house, training, music and weapons collecting and training. My dreams are to be Hokage and a Saanin."
Well Kakashi asked for normal and he got it. Mostly. The fact that he was friend with the Kyuubi No Yoko was actually not that alarming. This group of students surprised him already. So what else could they do?
"Right... wait! Do they...?"
Naruto tilted his head to the side. "You mean if they know about Kyuubi? Yea, well they are my family so telling them was the right choice."
Ok... this kid is scary...screws that, this whole bunch of genin were just plain nuts. He glared at his new cute little devils. Yep, that is what they are and if they could surprise a seasoned shinobi with the little bit of personal information that he was sure that they gave him; than he was screwed three ways to Sunday. Those buggers could have bobby-trapped the training field and he would not even know it. He had to be careful."
"...Sensei. Sensei!" He jerked out of his thoughts to see the devils gathered around him looking at him. What do they want now? "Meet me in Training ground Seven tomorrow and no breakfast or you'll get sick."
"Hey Sensei, do you want to come to come to supper with us?" Kakashi stared at the kids in shock. No one had offered a home-cooked meal. No one. How could he say no to his cute little demonic angels?
"Alright, if that is what you want, I'll come for dinner, "He said; amused by the fact that Naruto's twinkling Persian blues had turned into a cosmos when he said that he will come for dinner. Naruto cheered and bit his own finger; causing it to bleed. He made one handed hand signs and slapped the rail. A baby blue fox appeared on the spot that the genin-that should not know summoning jutsu- had just summoned it.
"You called Naruto-Sama?" The fox asked with a sweet feminine voice.
"Yes Cornflower. Four back to the Den please," Naruto commanded with a soft voice.
"Of course Naruto-sama." The fox started to glow.
The fox.
Was glowing.
The.
Fox.
Was.
Glowing.
Kakashi stared at the fox that was clearly glowing a soft blue-ish white colour. Sasuke and Sakura intertwined the fingers of their left hand in the fur. Kakashi looked over at Naruto and nearly jumped out of his skin when a hand slipped into his own. He looked down to realize that Naruto had placed his left hand on the glowing fox's head and his right hand was in Kakashi's own.
"Hold on tight Kakashi-sensei. I don't want to lose you in the world of the summons," Naruto said as he squeezed the intertwined hand a little tighter. Kakashi opened his mouth to ask what the hell they meant when he felt a pull at his navel and was yanked off of his feet. His world consisted of pale blue, violet and pink for about... two or three minutes and ended with another jerk to the navel and landing on a patch of grass. Kakashi's vision spun and waves of nausea crashed over him like a tidal wave. He twirled away from the genin, yanked his mask down and let lunch come up. And he did all that in under a minute. Impressive.
A small hand glided up and down his back in a calm, soothing manner while another held the silver hair away from his face. Someone was saying some and another person replied softly; Kakashi couldn't understand that was being said and he kinda didn't care. He was too busy loosing last week's lunch. Finally, the nausea stopped and the... whatever that was... was out of his system. A bottle of water was gently forced into his palm and he took small swigs of the water. Large gulps are the enemy.
"You feeling better? We should have warned you but considering you were a seasoned shinobi, we thought that a quick pop over would only make you dizzy. I'm sorry," Kakashi quickly fixed his mask and looked up to see a worried Naruto, an amused Sasuke and Sakura and the pale blue fox- it name was Cornflower right? - looking like a kicked puppy.
"I'm sorry sir. I didn't know that you would become so ill. If I had known, I would have used the river system. Please forgive me," Cornflower pleaded as big, sloppy tears marked her fur. Naruto quickly scooped up the sobbing vulpine in his arms and started to stroke the fur. Kakashi sweat dropped and watched as the fox kept sniffling and crying.
"Sorry about Cornflower; she is a Water fox and they are an incredibly emotional species of fox. They are considered to be the keepers of the gateways. All Water foxes can control a certain gateway but Cornflower is exceptional even among her own people. You see, she has the unique power to use all of the gateways but that makes her more emotional than even other Water foxes," Naruto said as he rubbed the silky pelt.
Kakashi looked surprised that Naruto knew that much about his apparent summons and if he was to be honest; he was curious to know more. He may just sign a secondary contract with the foxes... If the thrice damned civilians got over their fear of everything and anything that looked like a fox.
"I would like to know more about your foxes. Would you care to tell me more?" Kakashi asked.
Sakura let out a groan while Sasuke shook his head in exasperation; that idiot just signed his own death warrant. Once Naruto got going, there was no shutting him up.
They tried.
It never ended well.
"Regular summons have a summoning hierarchy based off of what you have and how useful you are; if you're useful, you go but the foxes realized that the old system was getting the people they were contracted with killed and a summon does not like or tolerate that. So the foxes did an over haul of the system. They first organized their kind by two classes; Basic and Special. The Basic classes are Stamina, Agility, Strength and Speed. The Special classes are Battle, Protection, Healing and Weaponry. All classes interlink with each other but Battle is using the body as the weapon while Weaponry is as it sounds. They then use a command center to identify the needs of the summoning shinobi. After that they pick the fox that is closest to the needs of the shinobi and send them. If the fox that they choose is unavailable then they send the next best one. That way, the perfect fox is sent for the job. All this- mind you- takes place in the human equivalent of a nanosecond because time moves slower in the summons realm. This system has actually proven to lower shinobi mortality rates. They are currently the second lowest summons with a death rate; dogs being first because they use a pack per person summoning system. Once you summon a pack, they are yours till you die. The rest of the summoning world is starting to follow those two lead except for the old summons but they are traditionalists that have a stick up their ass... are you copying all this?" Naruto had said and asked all that while they went in the house. Kakashi hadn't even noticed that he had removed his shoes and was now holding-and petting- Cornflower at the breakfast bar; watching his cute little genin start to cook while a clone that he had apparently created was taking notes.
Yea, he was that badass.
"Yep; I wanted to know more because I am considering a secondary contract with them. Dogs are flexible like that. They work well with foxes and they allow it; unlike the traditional summons," Kakashi informed his student who pulled out a big bowl of dough from the fridge... damn that's a lot of dough!
"Oh. Ok. I personally recommend that you stay with the dogs though because while having a secondary contract may seem like a smart idea, it might not work out all that well and sometimes having a team that uses different animals and not sharing them actually covers all bases and prevents arguments from occurring. Dogs are expert trackers, while phoenixes are our eyes in the sky. Bulls are the powerhouses while foxes are intel and stealth fighters. We have all bases covers and we know our summons inside and out so we make no mistakes while summoning. They also play into our strength so you should record this information so that you have an idea of what our summons can do," The clone copied the whole thing while Kakashi mulled it over. The kid had a point. They had all bases covered and he just learned that all of them had summons. He nodded for Naruto to continue. Naruto smiled and pulled out more bowls from the fridge.
"Foxes have a total of six species. All of them are kind souls that love their shinobi and while we are on the subject; did you know that foxes are considered the second most loyal of the summons? Dogs and Wolves are tied for first, Cats third, Phoenixes fourth and Bulls fifth. They will never leave you. Back to the main topic; the first thing you should know is that all foxes have an elemental power tied to their species name. There are a few rare cases that the power-elemental or not; which is even rarer- is actually tied to the birth name. The first species we will cover today are the Fire foxes. Fire foxes are rash, bold, invigorating, and loud as hell; think with their hearts and not the heads and love to party. You can identify them by their red-orange and bronze fur. They usually fall under the Battle, Strength, Speed and Weaponry class. They are also be likely to attack at full force in a series of attacks that are similar to a blitz attack that will leave you scorched but they tend to burn out after a few minutes of this so pair them with either with a steady Earth fox or a just as rapid Air fox. A Water fox might work too but it makes combo moves a little difficult and they fight like Konoha and Kumo Nin. They are the go to fox though if you need a fox that will leave your opponents trembling in fear or if you just want to have the battle done quickly."
Ground meat, onions, garlic, peppers and some other things were being pan fried in a skillet.
"Earth foxes are kind, parental, sturdy, stubborn, heart before head, and quiet. They have a green to brown colouring to their fur. They have a tendency to fall in the Strength and Stamina class but they also go into the Protection and Healing classes. They have a habit of drawing the battle out; make their enemy wear themselves out and strike when the target is too tired to defend themselves anymore. Pair with a Fire fox for maximum damage or a Water fox for controlled chaos. An Air fox is too unpredictable for these gentle creatures so avoid using them together unless you want-or need-extreme chaos in a hurry. They are the foxes you need when you need a constant presence on the field that is sturdy or a healer."
Oil was added to another pan about half knuckle deep and turned on at low heat.
"Water foxes are sweet, emotional, loving, calm, head before heart and go with the flow creatures. They are easiest to identify by their blue fur. They fall into the Stamina, Agility, Healing and Battle class. They are similar to Earth foxes but they will strike if they see the perfect opportunity. Pair with an Earth fox for an easy to control mudslide or an Air fox for a wet, wild twister. Never a Fire fox because they tend to put each other out also the calmer Water foxes and the rash Fire foxes would most likely fight each other and not the enemy; although the enemy would most definitely get caught in the middle. Water foxes are the fox for the job when you need a fox that will adapt quickly and stay cool in the thick of it."
The dough is being rolled out and cut into palm sized circles.
"Air foxes are swift, intelligent, free spirited, noisy, nosy, head over heart and go where the wind takes us kind of foxes. They have a silver to pearlescent look to their pelt. These foxes fall under the Agility, Speed, Weaponry and Protection class. They act like Fire foxes and they tend to strike first but they will stop or observe the enemy to learn something. They are best paired with a Fire fox when you are in need of a firestorm or a Water fox for an icy surprise. Never make them work with an Earth fox or you are going to have a disaster on your hands. They are the fox you need when speed and silence is key."
Filling was being placed in the dough and sealed; fork crimping the edges. One is tossed in the oil and it started to cook.
"The next two species work well with the others but not so well with each other unless you ask. And even that is pushing it. The first one of the two is Light foxes. These noble creatures are no-nonsense, analytical, sophisticated, head over heart and dedicated to learning as well as being honourable. You can tell that you have a Light Fox by the gold colour in their fur. They fall under Speed, Protection, Healing and Agility class. They are the kind of foxes that will stalk their quarry for days'-years even if that is what it takes- learning all about it before striking. They would use themselves as a shield for others by using their powers to create a light bomb to blind the enemy. They are the foxes you need when you are in a jam and need a fox that has an even cooler head than a water fox."
More tossed in the oil. Constant check while lettuce, tomatoes, radishes and carrots were being chopped up.
"Dark foxes are fierce, compassionate, loyal, competitive, heart over head and even more noble and honourable than Light foxes. They will never go back on a promise and do everything in their power to fulfill it. They have a blackish-purple fur. They fall under the Strength, Stamina, Battle and Weaponry class. They will strike in a kamikaze style of fighting that result in them either getting their prey or gets them sent back to the realm of the summons. They are the foxes you need when a Fire fox is not enough for the job."
More placed in oil, more taken out of the oil and place on a plate.
"All species have an additional power that is symbolically linked to their element. Water foxes for example can access gateways between worlds or places through portals; while Air foxes have impressive vocal skills and can even mimic other voices. Fire foxes can change the size of their bodies depending on temperature while Earth foxes can grow any plants and food anywhere. Light foxes have vast knowledge and Dark foxes have powerful bodies for small creatures."
The rest were released from the oil and placed on the plate. Dressing was pulled out of the fridge and sauce was taken off of the stove.
Ding.
Dumplings are served.
The clone wrapped up the writing as Naruto set the piled high plate on the already set table... huh, when did that happen? Kakashi gave Cornflower one more pet and put her down on the bar as he turned his attention to the student who was still talking.
"All in all, foxes are peculiar creatures that have unique powers and skills-there are regular foxes that have a unique skill for every situation- that challenge the other summons in terms of superiority. The Dogs, Cats, Wolves, Bulls and Phoenixes are the few that are on par with Foxes and they are one of few summons that use the class hierarchy. If you want to learn about the Bulls and the Phoenixes, I recommend that you talk to Sakura and Sasuke respectively. Sasuke uses the Phoenixes and Sakura uses the Bulls," Naruto said as he placed the juice on the table and turned to a bell.
"Cover your ears," Naruto said as he snatched a cloth covered mallet. Kakashi did just that when he raised it and slammed it against the bell. Naruto seemed to wait for something. Kakashi was about to ask what they were waiting for when two blurs flew into the room and planted themselves on either side of the head chair. Kakashi blinked at how quickly Sakura and Sasuke had come for dinner and he settled in his seat.
Naruto glared at the three at the table for a minute. Sakura quickly saw it and tapped Sasuke's arm, racing him to the sink. Kakashi watched them fight over the soap as he got the gist and went to wash his hands. He pulled his gloves off and grabbed the soap from the feuding genin. He quickly scrubbed his hands clean, tossing the soap back into the fray and dried them on an offered tea-towel. Kakashi moved back to the table and watched the still fighting genin.
"I got here first so hand over the soap!" Sasuke snapped. Sakura had the soap in her hand, her arm raised high above the slightly shorter male.
"Nope! I got the soap first and besides isn't it ladies first?" Sakura retorted.
Sasuke snorted, "I see no lady. Just a cow."
Sakura shrieked in rage and lunged at Sasuke, dropping the bar of soap. Sasuke and Sakura tumbled out the back door in a cloud of limbs and dust. Naruto shook his head and washed his hands. He sat at the head of the table. Kakashi realized that he was seated across from him. Naruto dug into the dumplings that he had made and Kakashi took his cue to eat.
Kakashi listened to the shrieks, howls, ripping and hissing that was coming from outside. Naruto just ignored the commotion that the two were making.
"Does this happen often with those two?" Kakashi asked as the sound of a clay pot shattering filled the air.
Naruto snorted, "Yea, all the time. Everyone thought Sasuke and I were rivals but Sakura and Sasuke are worse than he and I ever was when we were acting. They will go to war over the littlest thing such as the last dumpling and who has laundry duty that day. It's funny as hell to watch on a good day and annoying as hell on a bad day. They will sort themselves out soon enough anyhow. Just leave enough for them to eat and I will be happy."
Kakashi grinned underneath his mask.
"You dumb woman!"
"You damn pussy!"
"Bitch!"
"Jerk!"
Naruto got up; apparently having just about enough of the fighting, snatched a pair of rubber balls out of the nearby fruit bowl and whipped them out the door. Kakashi chuckled when two 'thwacks' and twin cries of indignation were heard; Naruto already sitting back down. Sasuke and Sakura storming in with an enraged look but they paused when they saw the food. Sakura swiftly washed her hands and sat down with Sasuke not far behind her.
"Itakimasu!" They quickly said and they dove into the mountain of dumplings, chopsticks clacking and food being stuffed into their mouths. Kakashi quickly snatched a few onto his plate, fully intending to eat when no one was looking. He got that opportunity when there was only one dumpling left; Sasuke and Sakura were engaged in an intense stare-off with Naruto watching on the sidelines.
"Alright, same rules like last time," Naruto stated as the two in question glowered at each other, "No biting, no stabbing each other in the face, no deadly weapons, not maiming and no needless destruction of my dishes. You break it; you have to buy a new set," Sakura and Sasuke quickly nodded, "Alright; on your mark," They raised the chopsticks, "Get set," They tensed, "Go!"
The only way to describe the fight that followed was absolute chaos. The chopsticks were engaged in a violent dance, intent on get that dumpling. Sakura wielded her like a pair of wooden kunai while Sasuke used them like daggers. Sakura blocked Sasuke's chopstick with her own and Sasuke parried the incoming chopstick with his.
Kakashi quickly ate; not wanting to be seen without his mask by his students. Naruto was refereeing the whole thing with an iron hand. The fight finally ended when Sakura speared the dumpling with her left chopstick and had stuffed it in her mouth before Sasuke could intercept it.
Kakashi loved the smiles that his genin had the whole time.
I am on a roll!