The Boondocks meets China, IL

by CKingwill

After taking a practice ACT test at age 12, Huey Freeman receives an impressive score that attracts the attention of a university. Granddad, eager for scholarship cash, sets up a visit to the University of China, Illinois. Unbeknownst to the Freemans, this school was deemed the worst college in America. Antics between UCI denizens and The Boondocks gang are sure to occur.

4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

As they walked, Baby Cakes couldn't stop looking at Robert. He looks like Bill Cosby! He kept thinking.

In the back of the group, Riley whispered to Huey: "Aye, this nigga look gay but he seem alright actually."

"If you say so. Everything at this school seems off, including him" Huey responded.

The tour group passed students and staff alike. Handfuls of students seemed very unruly.

"Alright so we here at the library" Baby Cakes informed his tour group. He gestured to the library, a four-story building that would have been more appealing, save for the collapsed left wall. "That was some accident earlier this month" Baby Cakes said, regarding the wreckage. "This library was built on an ancient Native American burial ground. But hey, basically all of America was built on Native American burial grounds." Out of nowhere, Baby Cakes slipped out a bottle of beer and uncapped it and took a huge swig.

"Isn't drinking on campus… illegal?" Robert stuttered in asking.

"Nah Bill — I mean — I'm 30" Baby Cakes also stammered.

"Oh. Can I get a swig?"

"Hell yeah!" Robert happily took a sip of Baby Cakes' beer.

"Dem niggas and getting' drunk" Uncle Ruckus muttered with a scowl.

"Man dis college ain't lame so far" Riley said.

"How can you say that?" asked Huey.

"Man, dat nigga be drinking beer in public like nobody be giving a fuck! If Young Reezy was up all in here, I be cheating niggas and selling hoes and nobody would give no fucks neither! Man, U of China, Illinois is da shit!"

"I second that!" Baby Cakes called back to Riley. Baby Cakes, with the beer still in his hand, opened the door for everyone to enter into the library.

"So yeah, our books are grouped by academic subject" Baby Cakes said as he led his tour group through rows and bookcases.

"It's bigger than I thought it would be" Huey observed.

"UCI is a big school, little man" Baby Cakes replied.

"See Huey? You could probably read all these books!" said Robert, believing that he had found something to chastise Huey with in regards to the university.

"As if I would want to read The Hunger Games series" Huey mused.

"But we got books about Geometry, Geography, Physics, —"

"Geometry isn't a college-level math class…" An irritated Huey said slowly and coldly.

Following their painfully annoying visit to the library, Baby Cakes, upon Huey's request, brought Huey and the group to UCI's History Department.