Traveling alone with Sesshomaru was, as Kagome expected, completely different than traveling with Inuyasha. The playful bickering she had enjoyed with her hanyou love was noticeably absent with his half brother and the weeks she'd spent with him had not yet taught her to be comfortable with his enduring silences. And no amount of respect for him could prevent her from attempting to fill those silences with idle chatter.
"The sun is so bright!" She stated early the next morning after their first night on the road and sudden separation from Inuyasha. She was not surprised when he effectively ignored her. An idle chatterer he was not.
Sesshomaru had barely spoken after they left the village earlier the previous day. Not that Kagome had expected him to turn talkative while separated from his half-brother, but she did expect a more⦠relaxed companion with Inuyasha gone. At least that was her theory, as Inuyasha was rarely able to speak without Sesshomaru attending his remark with some scathing rejoinder. But Sesshomaru neither appeared more relaxed or even less irritated and that grated on her in particular. Especially when she didn't consider herself even close to as annoying as Inuyasha; transplanting theirs souls aside. But she did alight on a subject that perhaps would produce a rise out of the former demon Lord, if nothing.
"Sesshomaru-sama, can I ask you a personal question?"
His borrowed golden eyes slid in her direction which she took as an acquiesce.
"Why did you object to the clause your father instated so adamantly? I mean, haven't you been including Inuyasha in all the West's affairs because you didn't have an heir?"
She was startled when he stopped and faced her fully. Sesshomaru, regardless what form he inhabited, it could be Jaken's and he'd still be highly intimidating, and right now he was staring at her with the eyes of a well experienced and successful predator. She struggled not to fidget, and when he spoke his eyes never left hers.
"Understanding that is he the heir privately and including him in the workings of our territory is good strategy; pronouncing as such to a highly prejudice youkai society is not."
"But your father-"
"Father is dead." He interrupted. Turning on his heel he strode off, continuing on the path.
Kagome's confused eyes followed him until she realized that he was quickly leaving her behind. She had to run to catch up to him. The venom included in his previous statement effectively staunched any need for her to speak further. Her chances of living were higher if she didn't attempt it.
But Sesshomaru seemingly had other ideas. "Does it bother you Miko?"
Startled that he had actually initiated a conversation she missed what was asked. "Huh?"
"The prejudice of others?"
"Oh uh, I suppose so. I mean, I guess I just don't understand it. Human, hanyou or demon, we all have feelings and needs. I don't see how we're all that different. And Inuyasha, he's been more effected by it than any other's that I've seen, because he had to deal with it alone."
She paused, and joined her hands behind her back, walking thoughtfully.
"Myoga told me once that Inuyasha was barely a toddler when his mother died. He had no one. Its no wonder he's so rough around the edges. He never really had acceptance, even from Kikyo. I guess I just wish things weren't so complicated." Realizing that she was babbling and probably irritating him with her informal scolding, she shut her mouth with an audible click.
She was pretty sure she upset him, because he didn't comment and his jaw seemed to have been screwed down it was so tight. But after a few moments he replied.
"My father developed the same thinking." He said after a pause.
"What do you mean?"
"Your theory regarding all species. My father was of your opinion, believing we are not so different."
"Yeah, Inuyasha is living proof."
"It was not always so."
She nodded. "Yeah, I figured that too. Your hatred was too deeply ingrained to not have been taught from birth. Luckily, love changes things. At least it seems to have in your fathers case."
He eyed her with a look that was undecipherable. But didn't speak anymore.
They continued walking together in silence. Kagome felt a better now that Sesshomaru had talked a little. She didn't feel so much an imposition as she did before. It couldn't have been easy growing up under one impression, and then suddenly forced to accept another in the form of a hanyou brother.
"How far do you think we are from the village?" She asked.
Sesshomaru continued to walk on, steadfastly ignoring her.
The day was spent primarily in that fashion. She would ask a question or talk with him paying her no attention, only to comment on something when she finally fell silent. But he seemed more and more reclusive as the day wore on. By the time they had stopped for the night, Kagome had come to the conclusion that Sesshomaru was more of a cat in his mannerisms. You can call a cat all day and it never show up, but the second you turn silent and start to walk away, they come running along.
She proceeded to set up camp, and set out the non-perishables Inuyasha had asked for back at the village. There was plenty, the village had not wanted to anger the Western Lord, so they had enough to last them a few days.
Sesshomaru sat across from her at the fire. His form was rigid and he looked distinctly uncomfortable.
"Sesshomaru-sama? Are you all right?"
His golden eyes snapped to hers and she shook off the feeling of being caught like a deer in headlights.
"Do no concern yourself," He said, but it was clear that he was not.
She watched him for a few moments wondering what it was that was putting him on edge. She stretched out her senses and tried to find a nearby threat but came up with nothing. Deciding it was personal, she tried again.
"Sesshomaru, do whatever it is you need to do. You're aura is practically snapping with tension." And it worried her. She did not need a wound up demon/hanyou, especially one she couldn't predict.
His eyes slid to hers once more and then without a word, he disappeared into the dark woods.
"Well that wasn't what I was expecting." She ventured out loud and hoping that he hadn't left for good. It wouldn't surprise her. He hadn't left their company since the whole disaster started and Sesshomaru was nothing if not a solitary being.
Deciding not to dwell on it, she was safe enough for now, Kagome settled in. She wouldn't fall asleep yet, just in case he really did leave her, but she could relax after a long day of travel. Sighing, she stared up at the stars and wondered where Inuyasha was and how he was doing.
Inuyasha's arrival at the Fortress caused upheaval the likes of which he'd never experienced. The servants, soldiers and advisors had all gathered to greet him, as was customary, but he struggled heartily with keeping Sesshomaru's impenetrable mask in place.
Having only been here once before when he was very young, he struggled to not give himself away purely by getting lost. Jaken thankfully, had taken it upon himself to ready Sesshomaru's quarters, and in his eagerness to please him, insisted on accompanying him there. Normally he'd want the throttle the imp for being a nuisance but in this case, he'd let it slide.
Once safely inside and alone, Inuyasha slumped into the cushions of the Western Lords sitting area. The chamber was large and finely decorated. The cushions were plush and vibrant. The shoji doors were expertly constructed, beautifully painted and made nary a sound as they were settled aside.
He took to exploring, marveling at the rooms. He had never been in a keep so elegant, even in the castles his rag tag group had stayed in. There was a scroll room, bathing chamber, audience chamber, and finally, the sleeping chamber. Though the other rooms were beautiful, this one screamed Sesshomaru. Sparsely decorated, it was functional without sacrificing the elegance throughout the keep. The futon, though larger and more plush than anything he'd ever slept on before, was not unexpected. It was the only thing that made this room recognizable as the sleeping chamber, otherwise, it could be considered an armory. Various weaponry decorated the walls not occupied by the futon or the fireplace. It was obvious where Sesshomaru spent most of him time in training.
Smirking, Inuyasha turned to slide the shoji shut and was immediately arrested by the painting on gracing the front. Intricate though it was, he recognized the figures of his father, a young Sesshomaru, and Sesshomaru's mother standing together against the backdrop of a crescent moon. Those were not surprising. What surprised him was the two figures on the other side of his father; clearly that of Inuyasha's own mother and an infant Inuyasha in her arms. Behind them was a fierce dog demon, towering over in obvious protection and defense. Why wouldn't Sesshomaru have this removed or at least cut out the areas that contained him and his mom?
His musings were interrupted by the sliding of the shoji door at the entrance to his quarters. Recognizing the shuffling of Jaken, he made his way to the audience chamber.
"My Lord Sesshomaru, the staff is awaiting instructions for preparations for the council."
Shit. Ok Sesshomaru told him he would need to make arrangements. "Jaken. How many times have we been host for the council?"
Jaken blinked. "Numerous times Milord."
"Then you know what to do."
Jaken stood ramrod straight. "Y-yes Milord! Of course Milord! I'll see to it Lord Sesshomaru."
He watched as the smaller demon hastily exited the room.
"Keh. Maybe this will be easier than I thought."
"Inuyasha-sama?"
Whirling he nearly plowed right into the adolescent Rin. "Rin." He responded trying his best to sound like Sesshomaru.
She shook her head and gave him a sly smile. "I know it's you Inuyasha-sama. You may have fooled everyone else but you can't fool me."
He blinked as her smile faded. "What happened? Where is Lord Sesshomaru?"
"Eh, a little mix up."
Her eyebrows raised. "I can see that. Is he OK at least?"
He thought about Sesshomaru stuck with Kagome in his half-demon form. "Keh, as to be expected." He replied with a fanged grin.
She smiled back. "OK then." She replied with a nod. "You'll have to remember to not do that if you want to continue to pass as Lord Sesshomaru though." She said gesturing at his smile.
He cleared his expression. "How did you know?"
"I just do. Jaken-sama may have spent the most time with him, but I paid attention. I know him better than anyone. I knew something was off when you arrived at the courtyard."
"Shit. Then I've got to do try harder. I-I'm gonna blow it."
Rin shrugged. "You have everyone else convinced. I think I'm the only one who even remotely doubted."
At his worried expression she gave him an encouraging pat on his hand. "Don't worry Inuyasha-sama. I'll help. Between the two of us, no one will ever know the difference."
Feeling a tad bit better he gave her another small smile.
"Stop that."
He wiped the grin off his face. "Right." Still, at least he had one ally here. That was certainly something to smile about, even if he couldn't show it.
After the second night, the journey back to Edo became slow and torturous. Between Kagome constantly complaining and chattering and Sesshomaru being remarkably 'Inuyasha-like' the pair were sharing a mutually irritating journey. The tension was palpable. Even though Sesshomaru had returned the other night with a noticeably calmer disposition, something was still not right and Kagome was not handling the tension well. But unlike Sesshomaru, she was unable to suffer in silence; hence the nagging.
"Not sure if you are aware but I'm not a demon. Or even a half-demon. In fact, I'm so opposite of a demon that I'm a Miko. So your demon pace is not working for me, in case you were wondering." Kagome griped.
"I am, and I wasn't." Sesshomaru returned with equal venom. "It is not my concern if you are unable to keep up the pace due to your humanity, however specified it may be. I don't not wish to delay our arrival at the village any more than necessary."
"If you are in such a hurry you could just carry me on your back. Inuyasha did it all the time."
Sesshomaru whirled around and nearly came nose to nose with Kagome. Momentarily surprised, she took a step back. "I am not Inuyasha no matter how you have attempted to make it so. I do not cater to humans. And I do not play pack-horse to those that are too lazy to keep up."
Kagome's aura rose and something within her snapped. Without thinking she yelled, "Sit!"
Sesshomaru crumbled to the ground in so undignified a manner, he had not experienced such since his youth. Despite the fact that Kagome had to know how much it infuriated him it didn't stop her from giving him a mouth full.
"Look you overgrown dog. I already apologized for that. I didn't mean to cause this and I know it was my fault. But that doesn't mean that you can just turn around and blame me for every bad mood that strikes your fancy. I'm sorry you had to hear those horrible things the villagers were whispering. I'm sorry your vassal couldn't even recognize you and called you names. But Inuyasha had to deal with that every day of his life. If you're so much stronger than he is, then you should have no problem sucking it up and stop being such a jerk!"
As soon as the spell wore off, Sesshomaru pinned her by the neck against the nearest tree. Giving her a look that was so frosty she literally felt a chill up her spine, he held her gaze. Though she still looked angry there was no mistaking the fear behind her eyes. It did little to quell his rage at her spell command, but it did make him release her. Without a word he stalked off.
As infuriating as the spell had been, he wasn't nearly as upset about that as he was the fact that she was right. As they headed out of the village he endured whispers and stares that made it almost impossible for his ears to remain erect upon his head. He had his fair share of gossip and scandal, being subject to the humiliation his father had wrought upon the West but it was never directed at him personally, nor was he the main offender. This was different and it had settled like a ball of his acid in his abdomen since they had left the village. His conversation with Kagome regarding his father had done little to assuage the notion that, for the first time in his life, he was inferior. He had attempted to kill the feeling away that night, but found that even that didn't help. He was unused to emotion and the fact that he was dwelling on it, making it grow into a gnawing loathing was making it all the worse. He didn't know how to deal with it.
He hadn't heard the Miko approach but wasn't surprised as she stepped up beside him. They continued on in silence, both still too upset to speak but neither feeling as if the tension would crush them any longer. Tension was funny that way; the moment you finally acknowledge it, it dissipates. It didn't mean their journey back would be any easier, just meant that they could handle whatever else came to head.
Inuyasha was not happy. In fact, that was the world's greatest understatement. Not only was he stuck in his fancy-assed, stuck-up icicle of an older half-brothers body, but now he was stuck acting like him. And on top of that, he was thrown into a situation he had to control but had no idea how to do it. The council meeting was just days away. He'd directed, ordered, and arranged until the only thing that was left to do was watch as the efforts of the staff took shape.
After being debriefed by Jaken, he understood that the Lord of the South had suddenly died (by questionable means), leaving behind his mate but no heirs. As it was, she and his lands were up for grabs. Fighting and conflict was next to definite if something wasn't done. The South was a large chunk of land with a good deal of resources that could be easily taken advantage of and squandered if the wrong person were to take hold. And according to Jaken, this conference was likely to last a while. Much had to be discussed. The Lords would take bids from those vying for the land and for the widow of the South. This meant that Inuyasha would have to listen to hordes of weaklings looking to grasp the power that was left behind. And it pissed him off to no end.
His only real ally in the entire place was Rin. And though it was nice to have someone that he could be himself around, she was still just a kid and not much of an outlet.
He couldn't help worrying about Kagome either. Though he didn't think Sesshomaru would hurt her and had all but promised to protect her, he still didn't fully trust him. But something else was worrying him too.
Since the day he had met that awkward girl who couldn't keep out of trouble, he hadn't had a moment where she wasn't on his mind. But lately, ever since he'd been in the full demon form, he would have moment's, even hours where she never crossed his mind. It wasn't like he didn't love her any more, but almost like he couldn't remember that he ever did.
He'd heard that full blooded demons didn't experience feelings like love but had never believed it. Now, it terrified him that because he was in this body, he might lose the only thing that ever gave him a reason to live. His only dream had been to be a full-blooded demon, and now that he was, he'd give his left arm (again) to be his own hanyou self just to feel the way he knew he felt for Kagome.
The other thing he found weird was, though he should be exhausted, he hadn't found a need to lay down and sleep since he'd left the village where he'd parted from his companions.
He hadn't really felt the need to eat either. When he did get hungry, nothing he used to love sounded appetizing. Even when Kagome served Ramen, it didn't taste the same, didn't hold the same allure. He was eating things he'd never dreamed of, and liking it.
Demon strength was foreign. He used to yearn for it, at one point, died for it. But being immersed in it, the politics, the pettiness and prejudice; the stigma of being a hanyou was nothing. At least when he was a half-demon, they left him alone. Though it had been years since his father's death and Sesshomaru had taken his place in the Western courts, the courtiers still alluded to the West's shame with thinly veiled insults and feigned civility. Inuyasha didn't understand how Sesshomaru bore it and it made him wonder that his brother hadn't just slaughtered him as child to rid the world of the evidence. But Sesshomaru hadn't done that. Now that Inuyasha thought about it, he probably should have.
The only place he really found solace was the sleeping chamber. It held the image of his mother and he liked the idea of her watching over him now. He'd also taken to training with the different weapons the room contained. It was strange, he was doing kata that he'd never been taught, like his muscles, his instinct took over and was reacting from memory. It didn't shock him. Sesshomaru held an immense amount of discipline. The body Inuyasha was currently housing had literally hundreds of years of training ingrained into it and he was learning what his form had always known. It was a completely unnatural feeling but when he gave in and let the instinct take over, nothing else seemed more natural. He was grateful for this knowledge being passed to him, albeit unconventionally. And with the crap going on here at the fortress, he could understand why Sesshomaru spent as much time as possible away, and was often found here when he did have to come back.
Putting the weapon he currently held back, he reached for Bakusaiga. The blade felt wrong and hummed unhappily in his hands. It probably knew that an impostor was holding it, but Inuyasha couldn't resist exploring the blade that was conceived from Sesshomaru's aura and strength. He swung it experimentally and found it to be perfectly balanced, suited to his brothers tall frame, an extension of his arm. It pulsed violently, as if in warning not to try anything.
"Don't worry, I aint gonna try anything. He used my blade once, I just wanted to see how it felt."
Seemingly satisfied, the blade quieted and allowed Inuyasha a few more kata. He put it back, out of sight, as Sesshomaru had asked.
He sighed. Looking at mural on the shoji, he glanced that the form of his old man, trying to alight some wisdom or insight to the unsettled feeling he was experiencing. His musings were interrupted.
"Sesshomaru-sama?"
Folding his haori back onto his frame, he strode though the door toward Jaken. "What is it Jaken?"
"Milord, your scouts have returned with some very important information on the death of the Southern Lord. It requires your immediate attention."
Inuyasha made his way over to the cushions in the audience chamber, choosing a disinterested and relaxed position he'd often seen Sesshomaru take, he faced the door. "Let them in Jaken."
He hoped, for the sake of everyone, that the news wasn't bad.
