Author's Note: It's kind of a bummer when you're supposed to have a day off for the first time in a while and then end up having to work 8 hours that day anyway. I guess I'm a little bit ahead with writing this story right now, because I just put the 2nd chapter up. Being ahead is definitely a good thing though. Today's chapter explores the question of does Daryl even really realize that his family should have beat him and he should been treated better as a person?
Feel free to leave a review if you have the time! And if you've read this far, I'm thinking about attempting to write a story with Daryl and Carol completely reversed, anyone interested? Carol as Merles little sister and Daryl has an abusive husband named Ed? Love to hear a few opinion on that if it's not too much trouble.
Disclaimer: I tried owning a zombie once, but had to put it down when it tried to bite me. It was sad.
The day had gone by at a blistering snail's pace. And then dinner had been miserable, old noodles with not enough sauce to cover the fact that they tasted stale. No meat, because that shit never kept and he hadn't been hunting for going on the second day in a row. In other words, shit sucked but nobody complained because they knew better not to. Daryl almost wished that one of them had complained; it would have been better than the silence they all sat in while eating together. It also would have distracted him from staring blatantly at Rick for nearly the entire meal.
A man should focus on eating when he had food in front of him, especially in today's world. You never knew just what meal was going to be your last. Daryl could only hope that no one noticed him smearing the food on the side of his face in his total focus on Rick. Though Judy seemed to laugh every time he did it, so maybe they just thought he was doing it for her. Seemed better than missing his mouth because eating was hard when he couldn't look away from Rick's face; who had not looked at him the entire meal. Like he wasn't effected at all by the things that had happened between the two of them.
Maybe he really wasn't and that was why Rick had had no problem walking away after the meal with Judith in his arms and a smile on his face. Thanking Carol for always taking care of the dishes as he went and murmuring softly to his little daughter. Judy had looked over Rick's shoulder to smile at him and reach her hand out like she was trying to wave. Little girl was the pure cymbal of happiness, not just for her family, but for absolutely everyone left in the prison. She also didn't seem to care that Daryl was acting stupid and only grinned at him when he nearly tripped stepping up and out of his chair.
Dinner was over now, and that meant that Rick to shower with him. Instead, Daryl ended up retreating back to his cell. With the promise to himself that he would need clothes to change into when they were done, because putting old and dirty clothes back on after you were clean meant you just shouldn't have bothered getting clean. Then he ended up not going because fuck he wasn't covered in guts and he hadn't been out hunting all day in the boiling sun; Daryl knew he really didn't even need a shower. Why go and be naked in front of Rick when he could be perfectly comfortable far away in his cell anyway?
It took him about 10 minutes past when it started getting dark for Daryl to regret not going and seeing the possibilities of what could have happened between the two of them. It took Rick until the sun was completely down and the moon was now up and bright in the sky to search him out. He didn't look angry like Daryl thought that he might, and he definitely didn't look clean either. Which was surprising; Daryl had thought that Rick would take his shower before coming up to yell at him. Maybe he was that mad Daryl's mind supplied; but Rick didn't look mad, he had his usual squinted eyes and confused look upon his face.
Daryl didn't bother looking at him after he had entered the cell; didn't want to see anger on Rick's face as he got in trouble for not listening to the leader. So he was more than a little bit surprised when Rick's strong fingers hooked under his chin and pulled his face up so that their lips smashed together. Daryl's eyes not only flew wide open, but also locked automatically up on Rick's face. Rick's eyes were on him as well, sweeping down and over Daryl's body the best they could with their mouths connected.
This kiss wasn't like their other kiss; it was rick scraping his teeth over Daryl's lip and his tongue prying the hunters open. It was intimate and scary to Daryl, but all he could do was groan around the assault. Rick was relentless, pushing himself farther into Daryl, so that he had a knee between Daryl seating and parted legs. Like he belonged there.
Fuck, if he kept rubbing his knee forward like that, Daryl would let him take up rent in that spot if he wanted to. Rick was all over him, hand gripping the back of his neck to keep him right where Rick wanted him, holding him. Rick was strong and determined, like he knew exactly what he wanted out of this, like he was just so sure of what this could be. It was easy to go with what Rick was doing when the man was so confident; even if he wasn't Daryl would have let him anyway. He'd follow Rick for the rest of his life with absolutely no problem, and trust him even through the worst of mistakes; because Rick was a good man and had managed to convince Daryl that he was that kind of good man as well.
The pressure on the front of his jeans made Daryl react instantly, though he hadn't exactly tried to fight it. The tongue in his mouth and beard scraping against his own stubble made his mind spin. Rick must have had a lot of practise at this kind of thing being married for like 10 years; because even though Daryl had thought he was a good kisser before this, compared to Rick there was just no way he was. And then just like the rush it had started in, it ended.
Rick had pulled back, to just stare at him. Stare at him with those deep eyes that seemed to know ever truth in the world, and understood anything rational that could possibly be thrown at them. Daryl felt light headed as his breath heaved out after that kiss. Though he was just as confused to why it had happened, there wasn't anything else he wanted but to have it happen again.
"I've been waiting for you outside of the shower since I put Judith to bed. You weren't even planning to show up, even with those bedroom eyes of yours staring at me the whole time during dinner." Rick growled while sounding disappointed in him. Daryl wanted nothing more but to beg Rick to forgive him, say that he'd be a good boy if given just one more chance. Damn it, Rick probably would just be angry with him though; asking for forgiveness when he knew he had done something bad. Daryl could easily remember all the times when not doing exactly what he was told got him a beating that ended with a long scar or broken bone.
"Sorry." Daryl had to look away from Rick's eyes as he said, choosing to stare at the dusty floor instead. There wasn't anything more he could say on the matter; Rick had probably already chosen what he would do for the disobedience anyway.
There was never a moment more tense as to when Rick pulled Daryl forward so that is cheek was touching the other man's chest. Rick's arms surrounded him into a hug, and Daryl listened to the man's heart beat fast and furiously in his chest. "You don't have to be afraid of me Daryl, not of me or anyone here anymore."
Daryl wanted to protest that he wasn't afraid of anyone or anything and that if Rick wanted to take a swing at him he should just get it over with. He kept quiet instead; it would be hard to speak with his face pressed up into Rick's chest anyway.
Rick kissed the top of his hair, in the way that no one ever had since before his mother had taken to drugs. It felt nice and he felt safe there in Rick's arms, though he wasn't exactly sure what from. Then Rick was pulling them both off the bed and taking Daryl hand in his own. Daryl came with him with zero resistance, taking in the smile that Rick gave him when he did so.
Rick gave him a small and quick peck on the lips before tugging Daryl along. "Let's go take that shower now." It didn't even occur to Daryl until much later than anyone could a have seen them walking hand in hand down to the shower. The only thing that stayed present on his mind was that when Rick smiled, his whole face seemed to along with his lips.