-1Chapter 4

Bobby grinned. He took a bite of his green beans. "Oh yeah? How did you manage that?"

Alex started to chuckle. "I wanted to be a Boy Scout..."

Bobby laughed now. He shook his head. "You wanted to be like your brothers."

Alex frowned. "I sure wasn't into Barbie dolls..."

Bobby smiled. He nodded in understanding. "You were a tomboy growing up. You still are. You became a cop."

She met his eyes. "That had nothing to do with why I became a cop." She looked away quickly.

Bobby raised his eyebrows. He knew they were getting into something she probably didn't want to talk about, but he couldn't help himself. "Then why did you become a cop?"

She tilted her head and closed her eyes. "Bobby..."

Bobby swallowed hard and nodded. "I'm sorry. That's none of my business. I know." He sighed and took another bite of his food. He ventured, "This food really is great..." He knew it was a bad segway, but he wasn't going to push something she didn't want to talk about.

Alex looked up, smiling faintly. "One trait that I didn't inherit was cooking."

Bobby snorted. He shook his head. "I'm sure you're a great cook. You made spaghetti for us one night, and it was very good."

She blushed. "My neighbor brought that...over before you got there. I...it felt good when you praised it so I didn't correct you..."

Bobby smirked. He leaned over and kissed her. "You don't have to impress me. I love you, and you're the best thing to ever happen to me."

Alex blushed again. She met his eyes. "I love you too...very much."

Bobby searched her eyes. He reached out and searched her eyes. He took a deep breath. "You have no idea...how much you mean to me. That you...are my rock. I...couldn't survive losing you."

Alex pulled back and picked at her food. She whispered, "You didn't let me in much the past year..."

Bobby closed his eyes. He sighed and looked back at his food. "No one needs to deal with some of the stuff that's been going through my head."

She frowned and argued, "I don't believe that's a choice you can make for someone else. Not for me anyhow." Bobby sighed. He couldn't look at her. "If I didn't let you...get too close...it wouldn't hurt so bad...when you were gone... That's...not something you wanted to hear."

Alex narrowed her eyes and thought for a long time before answering, "Aside from that letter...I haven't ever thought about leaving."

Bobby sighed. He shook his head. "Not... Alex, within the last...year and half...I've lost all the family I had left. I have...very, very few people I care about left. You... You're one of them, and I... I know it's ridiculous. You're so deep in my heart that it doesn't matter how much distance I tried to put between us, it would kill me if I lost you. If something happened to you..."

Alex met his eyes. "I am not going anywhere. You're not going to lose me. I couldn't do that to you."

Bobby shook his head. He took a shaky breath. Before he could stop himself, he replied, "You...can't do that. You can't promise me that. Anyone can go...at anytime... You have no control over that."

Alex frowned and pushed herself to her feet. "You'd think I would've learned that after burying my husband..."

Bobby watched her. He sighed heavily. "It's one of those lessons life...keeps teaching you."

Alex moved to the kitchen with her plate. "You should've learned to...nevermind." She ran her hand through her hair.

Bobby frowned. Grabbing his plate, he got up and followed her. "Should have what? I should have what, Eames? Learned to deal with losing people already? Be fine now?"

Alex closed her eyes. "that is not what I said. I didn't..." Her hands clutched the counter edge.

Bobby glared at her, placing his dishes in the sink. "Then what did you mean?"

"That u can live with your grief. You have to...find away to make it part of you but not let it consume you." Losing Joe would've destroyed her had she let it.

A/N: No, the confused one isn't back, but I wanted to give her something to look forward to when she returned. We have this finished it just needs a little work so I thought I'd post it so that no one forgets her. Not that any of us could, right?