Jonghyun, what exactly were you thinking?
It was cold and already dark, the street lamps casting an eerie glow as he walked, slowly, downtown for the second time that week. The air was still. Too still, as Jonghyun was left with no distraction from his rampant thoughts.
What is wrong with you? Your parents are going to kill you when you come home late. You know how strict they are.
Jonghyun ignored his pesky conscience and kept walking. The cold air hit his skin and he shivered. What if Key wasn't even there?
I'm not going to see Key. I just want a cup of coffee. Jonghyun tried to convince himself, but he didn't even believe such a flimsy premise. For a reason he didn't know or understand, he just wanted to see the boy again.
Jonghyun arrived at the shop at 8:05, but stayed hidden outside the door for another 5 minutes.
Why am I so nervous? He told me to stop by.
Jonghyun paced outside the shop, shying away from the windows.
Open the damn door already!
Jonghyun mustered all of his courage and stepped through the door. His eyes immediately landed on Key, who was cleaning glasses behind the counter. Key's eyes seemed to brighten when he saw Jonghyun.
It's just your imagination.
"Jjongie!" Key yelled, waving at him excitedly.
"Hey Key." Jonghyun said, trying to act casual, but this was difficult to do after seeing Key's reaction. The boy's excitement made Jonghyun's heart speed up. Key was happy to see him. Jonghyun had panicked for hours about bothering Key, but Key had actually wanted to see him. He was happy, but at the same time he felt a little foolish at how much he had worried. He approached Key at the counter.
"I guess I caught you at a bad time, huh?" Jonghyun said apologetically. Key grinned.
"It's alright, I'm just closing up. I'm almost done."
"I'll wait for you, then." Key smiled again. That same cute smile.
Stop. Thinking. That.
Jonghyun looked around at his noticeably empty surroundings.
"You're working here alone?"
"Yeah, I work alone most days." Key responded, cleaning the counters as he spoke.
"Isn't that a little dangerous?" Key just scoffed.
"Come on, in this little town? Nothing happens here. I think there's a bigger chance of me getting hit by lightning than of me getting robbed." Key said, rolling his eyes at Jonghyun.
"Wow, so that's what I get for worrying about you, huh?" Jonghyun said, laughing in response. Key met Jonghyun's gaze and smiled again. Jonghyun's heart somehow sped up even more. He quickly looked away, ashamed at his involuntary response. Jonghyun took notice of Key's nametag as he took it off and placed it in a bin behind the counter.
"Kibum?" Key's eyes snapped up and his face turned red.
"It's my real name… But I prefer Key." He said, trying to still act casual even though his face was bright red. He pulled his apron off and tossed it aside, wearing a gray v-neck shirt underneath. It was slightly loose, and Jonghyun stared in fixation at the bit of flawless skin that the low neckline revealed, hanging off his prominent collarbones.
"And…. I'm finally done!" Key said. Jonghyun's attention snapped back to Key. He completely lost his focus when Key stepped out from the counter, revealing him from the waist down. He was wearing a tight, ripped pair of jeans that hugged his legs, his smooth white skin visible through the holes. Jonghyun swallowed thickly
Stop looking at him like that. He's a boy. That's disgusting.
"I'll walk you home." Jonghyun said without thinking. Key's dark eyes met Jonghyun's again.
"That's alright, I don't want to bother you."
"I didn't come all the way out here to watch you close up. Come on, let me walk you home." It may have been Jonghyun's imagination, but for a moment it almost looked like a faint color of pink was creeping up Key's face. Key twirled his earrings between his fingers again. After he regained himself, he looked up at Jonghyun, smirking arrogantly as usual.
"Alright, Jjongie, suit yourself." He said playfully. Jonghyun, against himself, grinned stupidly at Key as he pulled open the door and stepped outside, holding it open to let the boy out. The air hit him, still and silent. They walked through the empty street, illuminated by a few streetlights randomly strewn about. Jonghyun cleared his throat.
"I just wanted to come by and make sure you were okay after today." He said after a short silence. Key's eyes fell for a moment, then stared back up at Jonghyun's with a carefree expression on his face. He laughed.
"Jonghyun if I broke down every time that happened to me, I wouldn't have time to leave the house!"
"They do that to you that often?" Jonghyun questioned. Key sighed and puffed his cheeks out.
"Yeah but it's no big deal. Really Jjongie, I can handle it." Key hopped up on the curb and balanced himself while walking, placing one foot delicately in front of the other, his arms outstretched.
"But why? I don't understand." Key sighed loudly.
"They don't like people like me, I told you."
People like me.
That phrase could mean anything. It doesn't mean Key's gay.
If Key was gay, Jonghyun would have to stop hanging out with him. Being gay was wrong. His parents told him that it was disgusting. His classmates told him that, using words like "gay" or "fag" as insults. Even the news told him that. If gay people couldn't get married, it must be because it was wrong.
If Key was gay, Jonghyun wouldn't be able to see him anymore. And for some reason, Jonghyun really, really liked seeing Key. So Key couldn't be gay. Right?
"Well it's not fair. At all. They don't have the right to do that to you, you didn't do anything to them." Jonghyun said, anger biting at his words. Key dismounted from the curb, hopping off elegantly.
"I guess being me was enough of a reason for them." He said, his face smiling, but it came off as almost a painful expression. After Key stepped had returned to his position next to Jonghyun, Jonghyun suddenly noticed how close Key was to him, their shoulders brushing against each other lightly as they walked. Jonghyun did his best to ignore this.
"Come eat lunch with me tomorrow. They won't find you in the courtyard." Jonghyun offered, looking for a way to somehow see Key again. And this way, he would be safe at the same time.
"Ok, I will." Key said, smiling at Jonghyun again. Key's face seemed to shine under the dull glow of the streetlamps.
Jonghyun walked along, avoiding the cracks on the sidewalks, swinging his arms in an exaggerated manner. He thought of Minho and his sister, each working hard to make their dreams a reality. Minho as a professional soccer player, and Victoria as a professional dancer.
"Hey, Key." He said, "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
Key gave Jonghyun a quizzical look, surprised by the sudden question.
"You tell me first." He said.
"Oh me?" Jonghyun said scratching his chin. "I don't know."
"Not even a clue?"
"Nope."
"Come on, there has to be something you're interested in."
Jonghyun thought for a minute, suddenly remembering something.
"Alright but you can't laugh." Key involuntarily started to giggle before Jonghyun had the chance to continue. "I mean it! No laughing!"
"Fine, fine! I'm not laughing, see?" Key said, completely straight-faced.
"Alright." Jonghyun said, sighing. "When I was younger I wanted to be a singer, but then I realized it was unrealistic, so I gave up."
"A singer? I can't picture you as a singer." Key said, tapping his chin. "I want to hear you. Sing something for me." He demanded. Jonghyun's face grew hot at the request.
"Come on, I can't do that! It's way too embarrassing!" He protested, holding up his hands and waving them side-to-side, as if he was trying to erase the idea completely.
"I want to hear if you're any good!" Key said, grinning. Jonghyun found it impossible to look away after making eye contact with Key. He had the kind of eyes you just couldn't stop looking at, the kind of playful stare you couldn't avert your eyes from, for fear you might miss one facial expression, one movement, one smile that showed his carefree and cocky attitude. He was so absorbed in Key's gaze that he didn't realize he had been standing completely still.
"Why'd we stop walking?"
"Because this is my house." Key said, laughing at Jonghyun. "But I still want you to sing for me." Key's house was modest, quite small and made of brick with a black fence surrounding it. There was a small rock path leading up to the front door. It was cute. Just like Key.
Jonghyun shook his head and rubbed his temples, hating himself for what he was thinking.
"I promise I'll sing another day. I'm not… Uh… Probably warmed up." He said, fumbling for a decent excuse.
"Fine, you'd better come through on that promise." Key responded, a devilish look coming across his face.
"Well you never answered my question, you know." Jonghyun said. Key walked through the small gate and closed it, turning around to face Jonghyun and resting his arms on it.
"I guess it's a secret for now. I'll tell you once you sing for me." He said teasingly, resting his face on his hands. Jonghyun laughed at Key's childish behavior.
"Fine, but you'd better keep that promise too."
"Oh, I will." Key said, turning around swiftly. He waved over his shoulder. "See you Jjongie." He said, walking up the path to his door. Jonghyun watched him as he walked, his eyes focusing on the boys lower half, unable to pull his gaze away even if he tried. He didn't turn around until the boy had entered into his house
"Bye…" He said quietly, still in a stupor. He turned around, bursting into an ear to ear grin that stayed plastered to his face the whole time he walked slowly back to his house, still in a daze. Even his annoying conscience asking him why he was so happy didn't manage to make him stop smiling. After all, Jonghyun was just excited to make a new friend.
He took a couple detours, not wanting to go home right away. Athough Key lived fairly close to his house, he succeeded in wasting an hour just wandering around, not getting home until well past nine. He drifted through the door, still grinning, but his good mood was brought to a halt when he saw both his parents glaring at him from the kitchen.
"Do you know what time it is?" His mom said, her icy glare freezing Jonghyun in place.
"Um, around 9:30?" He responded casually.
"You know you're not supposed to be out this late." His dad said, his voice low and threatening. Jonghyun, against himself, chuckled at his parents' absurd accusation.
"9:30 isn't that late, you know. Tons of kids go out much later than this." He said, trying to lighten the situation.
"Other kids do, but not you. You're more responsible than they are!" His mom said. Jonghyun sighed. He knew his parents were strict, but this was over the top. He rarely even went out on weekdays, why should they be this angry the one time that he did?
"Mom, dad, I'm sorry. It won't happen again." He said backing up toward the stairs. He knew that if he just admitted he was wrong and moved on, there would be no argument. "And now I'm a little tired, so I'll be seeing you later." He said, turning and racing up the stairs before his parents had the chance to bombard him with questions about where he had been, what he had been doing, or whom he had been with.
Jonghyun's good mood returned as he thought of his meeting with Key, and his mind flashed back to the cute image of Key puffing his cheeks out at Jonghyun's questions. He didn't really care what his parents had to say about him being late. He didn't care that he would probably be punished tomorrow.
For some reason, he felt good.