I DO NOT OWN Koichi, Koji or Digimon, but I DO OWN my OCs.

WARNING: This chapter features a lot of blood and really frightening emotions which I do not feel and never have felt, except anger and sadness. Suicide is wrong and I did not intend to give Koichi those kind of thoughts or feelings but it kind of sounds like I might have reading it again now.

B/N: This stands for beta's note and this is from Kojiluvr. Just a heads up, this is the first story I have ever beta-ed, so yeah. Newbie alert. Anyway, enjoy LacrymosaRules' story! :D

Chapter 4

As he arrived back at the house where his brother was waiting for him, Koichi knew Koji saw the look of anguish on his face. Koichi just couldn't keep it inside anymore; he picked up the empty glass on the table and hurled it at the wall causing it to shatter into thousands of glittering shards which ricocheted off the wall and flew through the air like tiny daggers.

Koichi flinched slightly as pieces of glass cut his face and, as he felt something cold trickle slightly down his forehead, he touched it, looking blankly at the substance on his fingers.

It was blood.

Koichi didn't care. In fact he needed to feel something, anything other than the beating of his tormented heart, and it was a relief for him.

As he stared at the blood on his fingers, he felt the cool blood drip down his face. He felt the anger leave him. And, most of all, he felt a numb calmness and a sense of peace.

Koji stared at Koichi, horrified at his outburst. He had never seen his older brother this angry or violent before. The look of tranquility on his brother's face as he stared at the blood on his fingers shook him to his very core, making him feel an emotion he hadn't felt since the hospital after the digital world. Koji was scared. Scared of the person he loved and trusted the most in the world.

Scared of his other half.

Koji was terrified almost to the stage of crying. What had happened to his brother? In his mind's eye Koji saw his brother's smiling face, happy. The old Koichi.

Then he came back to reality with a sharp gasp as he saw Koichi collapse in front of him.

Koji ran over to his brother and hugged his unconscious form tightly, tears springing from his eyes.

"K…Koichi," He whispered, tears trickling slowly down his cheeks.

Koji pulled his phone from his pocket, dialed 119 and stated where he and his brother were and why he was calling between his heavy sobs.

It's going to be ok; Koichi is going to be fine, Koji told himself, hugging his brother tighter, but even as he looked down at his brother's limp form a second later, Koji felt like his heart was tearing in two. Koji couldn't lose him, he wouldn't lose him. Not again.

Tearing a strip of cloth from one of the sleeves of his jacket, Koji carefully took off his bandana, his long, raven hair flowing down to his shoulders as the ponytail came undone, placed said cloth underneath Koichi's head and laid him gently down on the floor - after making sure he wasn't lying on any glass. Koji grabbed the strip of cloth, wet it under the tap and started to wash away the dried blood from Koichi's face.

Eventually, all the blood was gone and Koichi looked more like himself again. His old self. Koji then tore another, longer, strip of cloth from his jacket - this one easily half of his sleeve - and bandaged the huge gash on Koichi's forehead.

Koichi was surrounded by his element; darkness. He felt safe. He was one with the darkness, but something was missing. There was no pain anymore, no heartache. He didn't want anything, or need anything. For the first time in a very long time he was truly happy.

But suddenly, he heard something. He held his breath and listened. It was a voice calling his name. He knew that voice, but he couldn't remember who it was. It was the voice of someone he knew, from a dream perhaps. The voice was full of love and concern. There was something about it, something Koichi couldn't recognise.

Suddenly a bright light engulfed him and Koichi felt a sharp pain somewhere in the vicinity of his head as his heart become heavy with sadness again. Koichi felt himself missing something, missing someone. Koichi heard the voice again saying, "It's ok Koichi, I'm here." Koichi blinked open his eyes slowly and looked up at his brother's worried face and whispered, "Koji…"

Koji - relieved beyond belief that his brother was awake - hugged him tightly, but soft enough so as not to hurt him as the ambulance arrived outside the house and the paramedics came rushing in, carefully lifting Koichi onto the stretcher. Koji picked up his bandana, re-tying his hair as he followed the stretcher into the ambulance. He sat beside Koichi stroking his hair in a comforting way and knowing that it was going to be ok and he wouldn't lose Koichi. Koji's face darkened for a second as he thought about the events which had led to this near tragedy, he thought to himself, I need to find that girl; I won't let this happen again.