We'd sat there for probably two hours. It had been quiet in the beginning, some softly spoken words with awkward stretches of silence between. I'd claimed my desk and he had sat on the bed, facing me.

"I…I'm sorry, Commander," he'd said, looking at the floor. "I…"

I'd felt a twinge of guilt at his words…He hadn't needed to apologize for anything. "Kaidan…It's still John," I'd offered. "You don't need to be sorry for anything. I crossed the line. It was my fault."

He'd flashed a brief smile. "No. It wasn't that at all. You didn't do anything wrong, it's just that…Well, you forced me to acknowledge something."

What the hell was he talking about? I hadn't said anything, wondering if he was going to continue. When it'd been clear he wasn't, I'd spoken up. "What do you mean?" Man, I felt dense, like I should've known what he'd been alluding to.

"John." He'd laughed a little then, nervously, quietly. "Don't you get it? I walked out because when you said that, I realized that I couldn't get away from the feelings I have for you by just pretending that they don't exist. Before, you were my commander, and you became someone I'd be honored to call 'friend.' But the light I've seen you in recently, the way I feel about you…It's been more…" He coughed. "More than 'friendly.' You just don't get like that for your commanding officers. Especially if they're men, too."

I'd been unable to do anything but stare at the floor. Must've looked like a total dumbass, but he'd just coldcocked me with that- what else could I do?

"John. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have just walked out on you like that. I should've been honest with you. You've always been on the level with me, and I…I should've shown you the same respect."

I'd done the only thing I could've done- shake my head and laugh a little. "Kaidan, I…Kaidan."

"If you can forgive me, then maybe we can try this again."

Hell if he hadn't been so much better at this than me. Commander John Shepard, first human Spectre, galactic badass, reduced to nothing more than a flustered schoolgirl by this cool, calm biotic Marine. My father must've been rolling over in his grave. His son, the soldier, acting like this, over another man no less. Ah, fuck it.

"Yeah, I'd like that." I'd finally managed to find my voice again, before adding with a stupid grin a mile wide. "I'd like that a lot."

I'd gone over to the bed and sat next to him, kicking off my boots and pulling my legs up. We'd hung out, discussed our pasts and where we hoped our futures would take us, and just took the time to be in the company of friends until it was time to go back on duty.

This time, when he'd left for his bunk, the feeling wasn't one of emptiness and failure, but of contentment.