Marinette Dupain-Cheng wasn't sure if she has a terrible luck.
Adrien is Chat Noir. Chat Noir is Adrien.
How she got home, she didn't know. She didn't care if someone saw her de-transformed, even if it was Chat himself.
Though he was a partner she had trusted her life with, and considered to be her other-half's best friend, Ladybug never dared to reveal herself to him. But after finding out that he was actually the love of her life, she didn't know what to say.
"Adrien is Chat Noir. Chat Noir is Adrien."
The red kwami hovered above her head "You've been saying that at least a hundred times already."
"I - I can't help it!" Marinette blurted, with another wave of tears spilling on her blue eyes. "It was mind-blowing, Tikki. Information overload. These revelations happened in less than a day! He - that stupid cat...he almost died. Then I found out that he's Adrien. Tikki, what shall I do?"
She covered her face with pillows and sobbed.
Tikki understood her charger's feelings. She was just a maiden-in-love mixed with teenage confusions. Empathizing, she touched and caressed her dark hair.
Marinette didn't peg Chat as Adrien initially. He was a flirty kitty while the other was a gentleman. But these opinions started to expand as she began to discover some traits beneath these two persona.
Now that she was able to think about it, both were heroic, courageous, reliable and dorkable. They even shared the same physical structure like blonde hair, impossibly green eyes and height.
There were times she thought she was talking with Chat whenever Adrien crack some jokes, or Adrien whenever Chat became serious. But she brushed off these ideas numerous times, believing that it was a wistful feeling from a good friend.
The breaking point was the lucky charm.
It was a gift from her grandmother during her visit in China when she was young. A five-petal flower was carved on the jade stone's surface, as well as her mother's maiden surname Cheng on its side. One could feel the subtle mark by running a finger on it.
She might be a noob for Chinese language, but she could identify few calligraphy, especially if it was something significant.
It was a sort of lucky charm that one couldn't buy in any stores, not only because of the character engraving but because of the customized design. The red string that was weaved on the beads were original patterns, and if by chance it was copied randomly, her surname would always stand out.
Which was why she immediately knew the lucky charm was hers.
Everything fell into places when he told her where he got it. He didn't lie technically - she was actually the one who gave it to him. To his civilian self.
"How can I tell him that I'm Ladybug?" she murmured between sheets.
Tikki sighed and nuzzled Marinette's cheek. "Do you have to?"
"It'll be unfair for him not to know about me, after I learned his secret." she sniffed. "I mean, I had several close calls in the past, and all of them gave him an opportunity to discover my identity. But he didn't, even though he wanted to."
"Is that what your heart says? Or your brain?"
Marinette popped her head and glanced at her kwami "I thought you'll agree."
"Not if it's out of obligation." Tikki smiled. "I know that the reason why you refused to reveal yourself was to protect your loved ones from the evil hands who were aiming for Miraculous, and Chat was not an exception - until he became a special case. You didn't want to be the reason for Chat's captivity in the event your Miraculous will be taken."
"Am I really that pessimist?"
"Spot on."
Marinette grimaced. "Is that a pun?"
"Not intended. I can't help it." the kwami shrugged.
Marinette slumped on her back and faced the ceiling. She might be overreacting, but what would be the ideal emotion a sane person must have on her current situation?
She'd be lying if she said that she was unhappy Chat Noir was Adrien. She has a crush with Adrien for ages, and knowing that Chat was head over heels with Ladybug, and being Ladybug herself, it was a requited love.
Problem was, the guy's in love with her alter ego.
"If by not telling him means that I don't want to see his disappointment that I'm Ladybug..." she murmured, "Does that makes me a bad person?"
"You're putting yourself down again, Marinette."
"I'm not. Fact is, Ladybug and Marinette are two sides of a coin. I'm just a clumsy and shy girl who trips in the air and stutters whenever she's in front of her crush. Ladybug, on the other hand, is nothing like that."
"As if Ladybug didn't mess up on her first akuma." Tikki grumbled, but her charger didn't reply.
She knew that there were several Miraculous holders in the past, and according to Tikki, not all of them revealed their identities to each other. Some of them harbored resentments, while others ended up together.
She wasn't sure what category Ladybug and Chat Noir were classified. But in case the Big Reveal would be inevitable, she hoped that in the future, the friendship between Marinette and Adrien remained the same.
"I don't know what to do when I see him tomorrow." she muttered before she lulled herself to sleep.
.
.
.
.
The alarm sounded so loud that Tikki was forced to jump towards the snooze button. It was morning already, so she nudged her charger to get up.
"You have a physics presentation today." the kwami reminded her which earned a grunt.
"Five minutes." Marinette sighed while crawling outside the blanket.
Squinting, her eyes wandered on the clock, then towards the thick binds on top of her desk. Whether she liked it or not, she must speak with Adrien today about their project.
"Crap, I feel barvy."
She felt like her body was wrecked by a bulldozer. Restless sleep gave her some dark, droopy eyes, and a terrible migraine.
After a very hot bath to fight the chills, light makeup to hide her fatigue, and a hearty breakfast, she still looked like a walking zombie.
"You're unwell." Tikki said with concerned expression.
"I'm fine. Just sleepy." Marinette yawned as she brushed her kwami, who silently slipped inside her bag.
Before she could reach the door, Sabine stopped her while Tom was trailing behind them.
"You have a fever, Mari." she commented as she pressed a hand on her daughter's forehead, then moved to touch her neck. "I'll call your school now, so go and get some rest upstairs."
"But Maman," the pigtailed girl whined. "I have a project presentation today, and a pop quiz with Mr. Decour, and Alya has -"
"Marinette." Tom interrupted. "Listen to your mother."
Her father might be a goofy bear but once he got serious, he could be a scary giant.
Resigned, she dragged her feet back to her room. Then closed the door.
She has a plan.
"Tikki." she called. "Spots on!"
"Please, Marinette. Don't -"
The kwami was forcibly sucked by the earrings and transformed Marinette into Ladybug.
She was sorry for Tikki, but she must to go to school. She needed to. She didn't want to be holed up in her room and wallowed about yesterday's revelation. She wanted distraction, and her school has it.
Even if Adrien was there.
Your secret is safe with me, she wanted to tell him, but couldn't.
She must act like nothing has changed. And that should start today.
Carrying her knapsack and a paper bind she hooked behind, she flung her yoyo for a joyride.
Unfortunately, her world began to spin around until she was swallowed by darkness.
Her last thoughts before she fell was the damaged lucky charm, which might be the sign of her misfortunes.