Title: Interoffice Stereotypes

Author: Jmaria

Rating: PG-13

Disclaimer: Not mine, but a girl can dream can't she?

Summary: What not to do on your first day.

A/N: Ok, have I said how much I adore this fic yet? Cuz I do. Anyway, Katie and Marcus made a surprise arrival in my fic and yes, they are married, but they are also the representatives of the Players of Quidditch (P.o.Q.) Anyhoo, I wasn't going to have them (or Katie) in there at all - but they are so they are. I might have to (after I finish this fic) write about how they hook up. I'm glad that people like this fic as much as I like writing it.

She Sucks The Lives Out Of Little Children And Poodles

Fred tried not to stare at her like a idiot, but it was kind of hard not to. Who dressed like that to work at a joke shop? Heels and pearls? But then it sunk into his sleep addled head.

"What's wrong with my clothes?"

"Besides the fact that it's soaked, has more holes than a fish net, and that they look as if they haven't been laundered in three weeks?" She snorted.

"Didn't anyone ever tell you that you're supposed to suck up to the boss, and not insult him on your first day?" Fred retorted.

"What happened to you?" She asked.

"Spilled coffee on myself when someone busted the door in."

"Was it hot?"

"No, thank Merlin." He muttered a quick cleaning spell and turned to face the smashed in door. "Couldn't use an opening spell, could you?" He was shocked that she blushed in embarrassment.

"I was too angry."

"Why?"

"I spent the last twenty minutes in the company of Mr. Flint and Mrs. Bell."

"Twenty minutes? You poor thing." Fred rolled his eyes. "What were they arguing about now? Let me guess - Quidditch?"

"Quidditch." She muttered a repair charm on the door and turned to face him. "I'm gonna ask you two questions, and you'll be straightforward and answer me."

"Go ahead."

"One, is that really what you wear when you're in the shop?"
"Comfortable clothes, you mean?"
"Yeah."

"Yeah."

Millicent gave a huge sigh and muttered something under her breath. Fred watched in amazement as her skirt turned into a pair of muggle jeans and her long blouse into a tee and jumper, her heels a pair of trainers.

"And question number two?"

"Which twin are you?"

"Fred."

"So you're the moron who owled my house." She said crossly.
"Apparently that wasn't a good thing."

"No, it wasn't. My mother saw it." She said simply.

"And that's bad because . . ."

"My mother doesn't know why I need this job."

"Your mother has no clue that there's a Quidditch strike?" Fred was confused.

"No my mother has no clue that we're - " She stopped herself. It was one thing for Blaise to know that they were broke, but it was another to tell Weasley. So she said the first thing that came into her head. "My mother thinks my father died in the battle. She thinks she's a widow, when her husband is still alive. He's alive, but he's a vegetable."

"And as a rule, the families of those who were kissed have to foot the bill for their care." Fred finished. "Malfoy told Gin."

"Malfoy probably whined it at her." Millicent snorted.

"I take it you're not a big fan of his?"

"Not in the slightest."

"I think we're gonna get on fabulously, Bulstrode." Fred grinned at her.

"If I don't end up killing you in the process." Millicent rolled her eyes.

"Come on, I'll give you the grand tour."

The grand tour took all of ten minutes. He showed her the stock room that doubled as a break room, his office and lab. Next he showed her where the loo was, and then back to the counter. He was showing her how the register worked when the door quacked.

"Boys, I need you to help me -" A plump red-haired woman called from the doorway. Fred dashed about the counter. "Oh, I'm sorry dear, I didn't see you." She said to Millicent. "I thought I'd bring you and your brother some lunch. Where is your brother, Fred?"

"Out with Ally, shopping for Wedding robes."

Millicent tuned out majority of their conversation. She stared down at the register, going over in her head what he'd showed her. She was so deep in thought that she didn't hear the woman say something to her.

"Pardon?" Millicent asked.

"I asked if you'd like some of this food. Fred here will - " The woman stopped to rephrase her sentence. "He'll be able to eat it all, but then he'll be of no use for the rest of the day."

"That would be something new?" The words were out of Millicent's mouth before she could stop them. What was up with this rash of verbal diarrhea that she seemed to be plagued with recently?

But the woman just laughed her head off, and Fred gave the woman a sour look. He handed the food over to Millicent.

"Oh, dear I haven't had a chuckle like that in ages." She wiped a tear from her eye. "I'm Molly Weasley, Fred's mum." She extended a hand to Millicent.

"Millicent Bulstrode." She said. She half expected the woman to yank her hand back, but all she got was a shocked 'oh'. "I'll go run these things back to - yeah."

Molly Weasley spun around to face her son. Then she smacked him roughly on the arm.

"You couldn't warn me?"

"Mum, what are you on about?" Fred demanded, shying away from her next smack.

"I - Oh, never mind."

"No, tell me."

"I - well, I may have frozen her father in the last battle." Molly said quietly. "And everyone knows what happened to Gerald Bulstrode."

"Mum, I don't think that's -"

"When did you meet Millicent?" Molly changed the subject quickly. "How long have you two been seeing each other?"

"When she came in about a job yesterday. And we're not seeing each other. I'm her boss, she's my employee." But Fred could see the matchmaker gleam in her eye. "Dear merciful Merlin, woman, you've already got two of you kids married and three more on the way."

"Well -" But she stopped as soon as Millicent came back into the room. "I best be off, Ally and George will be stopping by the Burrow for tea after their fittings. It was nice to meet you, Millicent."

"Yes." Millicent gave her a nod.

"Fred, be sure to come by for Sunday brunch. Percy's going to be there."

"Oh joy." Fred rolled his eyes.

"Oh, hush." She gave him a quick peck on the cheek before turning to leave.

Molly Weasley gave her that look again. Millicent's hand clenched. The woman had practically yanked her hand back when she heard Millicent's name. It had never occurred to her that people who fought so adamantly against everything Voldemort had stood for, would be just as prejudiced as his followers were against muggle born people.

"Mum said the food'll keep for a few hours, nothing that'll spoil."

"Yeah."

"I guess we better run you through the inventory."

"Yeah."

Millicent tried to keep everything straight. They made a lot of products, and some of them were easy to confuse. He quizzed her a few times on where things were located. He was still quizzing her when the door quacked again.

"Well, somebody worked real damn hard to get you out of your clothes, Mil." Katie grinned at her.

"What happened to her clothes?" A voice boomed.

"Bloody hell, nothing, Flint!" Millicent boomed right back. "You're not my bleedin' father. And I'm dressed perfectly acceptable to work in a joke shop."

"Yeah, Flint." Katie jabbed him in the side. "I mean, if there's anyone here who's dressed inappropriately, it's the Twin here." She poked a finger in the hole near his stomach. "When I can poke my finger through, it's a tell-tale sign to throw the damn thing out."

"Oi, get yer hand outta my shirt. Flint, keep a leash on this one will you?" Fred jumped back from Katie's tickling finger.

"Missus, I'll not so kindly ask you to keep your fingers out of Weasley's shirt."

"Can I put them in Mil's then?" Katie asked. She waggled her fingers at the other girl.

"No!" Millicent shouted. Her wish from that morning was turning into a prayer to any god who was listening.

"Anyway, we just came here to see our girl in the working environment." She gave a fake sob, "Oh Markie, our ickle Millikins is all growed up."

"Please quit." Marcus glared at her.

"Spoil all my fun why don't you. Anyway, we stopped in to tell you that there's a P.o.Q. meeting this week, down at the Ministry, and that reps from Q.U.A.B.B.L.E and Q.P.U will be there. If you want to come to it. The more female players we get there, the more we'll be able to squash these damn idiotic amendments they're trying to get into the standard contracts."

"That and some of us came to threaten Weasley."

"What?" Millicent cried. She was sure Fred would have said the same thing, but he only sighed.

"Zabini already threatened us, Flint. And Millicent did too."

"Zabini did what?" She shrieked.

"'Course, she's more threatening than you two combined. . ." Fred continued, ignoring the seething woman.

"For Seven bleeding years, you gits told me not to be intimidated by anyone, to be the intimidating one, and now that we don't have to worry about those kinds of things, you great big idiots think I've reverted to a poor defenseless - " She all but snarled. "I'm going on my break, that ok with you?" She snapped at Fred.

"Wha - yeah."

"I'll deal with you later." She narrowed her eyes at Flint.

With that, she popped out of the shop. Katie's face broke out into a huge grin.

"Blaise better run for cover. Too bad there's not enough time to warn him."

"She's become demented since she married you." Fred said to Flint.

"No, she just hid it better when she was in school."

"I'm just saying, you lot have to be a lot less protective of her." Katie sighed. "You can't change a lifetime of work in three years." She turned to face Fred. Katie squared her shoulders. "Seriously though, Gred. You put one toe out of line, we'll all sit back and cheer her on as she kicks you and that brother of yours into the ground."

"Nice to know everyone's on my side." Fred muttered.

A/N2: Ok, last time Katie and Marcus are in this for a while. Up next, the confrontation, and Mil actually gets some work done.