Remy looked down at the girl wrapped tightly in his arms. She was so strong, but he could still see the pain in her eyes when he'd broken her heart and now when he'd walked back into her life, to use her. Like everyone in her life…he was just regret, another broken heart…
I thought you'd be out of my mind
And Id finally found a way to learn to live without you
I thought it was just a matter of time
Till I had a hundred reasons not to think about you
He wanted so badly to tell her the truth. That he couldn't breathe unless she was near him, but he wasn't that selfish. He knew that she deserved a life in the sun; a life filled with joy and laughter…a life that a wanted criminal like him could never give her. He ran his hands down her cheek, letting the warmth seep into his cold hand.
But its just not so
And after all this time, I still cant let go
He'd tried. God knows he'd tried. He'd flirted, stolen, slept around, but at the night he felt sicker and sicker of himself. He couldn't look in the mirror anymore because all he would see was Rouge bent over in pain as her heart broke. He'd gone back to the mansion to find her, but to his surprise she didn't live there anymore and she'd hadn't told anyone what had happened. He had tried even then to justify everything that he had said that day…but he knew that true love didn't cause pain. That real love was sweet and kind and everything that their relationship hadn't been.
I've still got your face
Painted on my heart
Scrawled upon my soul
Etched upon my memory, baby
He could tare his eyes away from her. Her skin was a warm honey color, but her hair was lifeless and unwashed. Her eyes were rimmed in dark circles. She looked like she was happy in that little town…but he could see the emptiness in her eyes…and hated himself for causing it.
I've got your kiss
Still burning on my lips
The touch of my fingertips
This love so deep inside of me, baby
"Remy is so sorry…I am so sorry." His voice was barely more then a broken whisper…
I've tried everything that I can
To get my heart to forget you
But it just cant seem to
He ripped his eyes away and locked them on the rapidly changing scenery around them. The train didn't hesitate at the small towns around them…it simply went…with it's destination far into the horizon. He felt relief that he was coming home to his city…New Orleans, the only woman who had ever truly loved him.
I guess its just no use
In every part of me
Is still a part of you
'No…' he corrected himself. 'The city was the only woman he'd ever allowed himself to love. Many woman had convinced themselves that they loved him, and one,' he clutched her tighter in his arms 'had actually given him her heart.' He closed his eyes against the rising tide of emotion. He had a job to do, and Rouge was the only one he trusted enough to help him.
And I've still got your face
Painted on my heart
Scrawled upon my soul
Etched upon my memory, baby
He just hoped that she had it in her heart to forgive him.
I've got your kiss
Still burning on my lips
The touch of her fingertips
This love so deep inside of me, baby
He shifted Rouge gently so her head was resting the crook of his shoulder and her body was cradled in his arms…then drifted off into a sound sleep.
I've still got your face
Painted on my heart
Painted on my heart
Painted on my heart, oh baby
His dreams were vivid prophecy. They told him of a world his waking self knew would never come to be. A world where Rouge and him lived happily together, where they were happy…
Something in your eyes keeps haunting me
I'm trying to escape you
and I know there ain't no way to
to chase you from my mind
When he awoke they were two hours outside of New Orleans and Rouge had yet to move. He knew she wouldn't wake until tomorrow at least, but he wanted to see her eyes light up in fury. He missed her so much these last months that even her anger would be a welcome change from the silence of he absence. His legs where asleep when he tried to move them, but he couldn't bring himself to change positions, he was so happy to have her back in his arms. He loved the warmth that radiated from her slim body, it took the edge of his loneliness and made him hope against everything inside of him.
I've still got your face
Painted on my heart
Scrawled upon my soul
Etched upon my memory baby
He smiled a sad smiled at the limp form in his arms. This little girl was the strongest person he'd ever met, but was she strong enough for what he needed her to do, for the heartbreak of being near him again, because he sure as hell knew he wasn't strong enough for any of it.
I've got your kiss
Still burning on my lips
The touch of my fingertips
This love so deep inside of me, baby
He looked up and for the first time in many year he hoped that there was a compassionate God in heaven, and he prayed.
"I know that we haven't spoke before. I know that I've made some mistakes in my life…okay a lot of mistakes…but I love her. I just want her to be happy. I'm not the man she needs…Give me the strength to let her go…"He drew a ragged breath " Please…"
I've still got your face
I've still got your face
Painted on my heart
Painted on my heart
The song in this chapter is by The Cult and it's called "Painted on my heart"
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