Chapter Four
A/N: I have no idea how a Time Lord would actually regenerate (I'm relatively new to the series). So, I decided to have him do the actual changing while Molly wasn't there to tell her side of the story. So no flames, please!
Please continue to enjoy my birthday story for my sister!
Half an hour later, I emerged from Charlotte's room. After fifteen minutes, I'd stopped crying, then caught sight of myself in the mirror and decided to look stronger than I actually was.
I pulled on a pair of black pants and a navy-blue shirt, hurriedly combing my hair into a somewhat tame position. Pinching my cheeks slightly to give the pale skin a little healthy color, I sighed and made my way out of the room.
I saw the new Doctor and had to fight down another sob. Every difference in his appearance and manner was like a hard slap in the face for me. I hated change, and the most important person in my life had just changed as drastically as though he'd been replaced by a new person. It made me feel sickeningly nostalgic.
Within a moment, all three pairs of eyes in the kitchen were on me. I gave a shaky smile. While I had been getting myself ready, I had made a resolution in my mind: even though this man- alien- was not who he had been before, I was determined to go with him. Even though the one I had loved was as good as dead to me, being so changed and unlike his old self, I still wanted to see the wonders of the universe and the fascinating places in time. I would not give up life on the TARDIS for anything. Not even the loss of my Doctor.
'Feeling better?' I asked the new Doctor.
His brown eyes narrowed slightly in vexation. 'Y-yes,' he answered slowly. His voice was low and silky, easy to listen to. But it wasn't like his old voice. His old energetic, manic tones...
I pushed away these thoughts and continued to smile at the new Doctor (I simply could not call his just the Doctor... not yet). 'Ready to be going, then?' I asked, taking a step forward.
Martha stared at me, shocked. Charlotte's expression was similarly confounded.
The new Doctor looked at me with surprise, but the kind that one gets when they find a fiver in their coat pocket. 'You... you want to come?' he questioned, as though he was trying to clarify.
Steeling myself, I nodded, trying to give a reassuring smile. 'Of course. I've grown so used to the nomadic lifestyle. What on earth would I do in one place for more than a week?' I laughed, though I suspected it sounded a little too forced.
A broad grin broke over the new Doctor's face. I sighed inwardly at the sight of it- another difference, I thought dully. His new smile, thought it showed the same kind of sheer happiness his old one showed, seemed less manic and more... more... well, it seemed like he had a large amount of feeling but did not care to show more that a little bit at a time. I could, however, see the same underlying manic happiness glinting in his dark brown eyes.
No matter how happy and easy his smile was, I could not bring myself to take comfort in it. It was not the old one.
'Well, we could leave this afternoon,' the new Doctor suggested. I nodded, feeling apprehensive, yet excited to be gone from the cramped apartment.
He grinned again. Impulsively, it seemed, he moved forward and pulled me into a bear hug.
I confess I was horribly surprised. I had only known this new Doctor for half an hour. And he was already hugging me? Not wanting to seem cold and standoffish, I hugged him back, and suddenly, it felt right. Right that I should go with him. Right that he should feel close enough to me to give out random hugs. Right that I should drop the word "new" and just use "the Doctor".
'Thank you, Molly,' he muttered in my ear. 'It nice to know I have someone like you to stick with me.'
I bit back the retort I was longing to throw at him, something about how he'd rather it be Rose that had stuck with him, but decided that it was not the time, as he released me, to mention such things. I vowed to keep the words he said as he regenerated to myself, and never tell a living soul. Not until the time was right.
'Leave in... what do you think... an hour?' he supposed.
I nodded, a small smile on my face.
An hour later, all four of us were standing at the door of Charlotte's apartment. I hugged my sister goodbye, remembering the time I had first left with the Doctor. This time was better- at least she wasn't crying. I don't think I could have borne any more soppiness.
'Good luck, Molly,' she whispered in my ear.
I grinned, patting her on the shoulder.
'Bye, Molls,' grinned Martha, pulling me into a back-breaking hug. 'Tell me all about it when I see you next!' she ordered me, feigning a stern demeanor.
I laughed, nodding. And suddenly I had an idea.
That evening, I excused myself from the sitting room in the TARDIS, where the atmosphere was as thick as London fog. I beat the familiar path to my room, feeling the Doctor's brown eyes on me as I disappeared into the hallway.
Breathing deeply and feeling as though I hadn't breathed properly since early that morning, I closed the door of my room and sank onto the twin mattress. Though the day had been anything but draining, as we were drifting all day, I felt completely drained. I hardly had the energy to get up again and move to my bookshelf, the entire bottom shelf of which was covered in spiral-bound notebooks. Half of them were unused- I took on of these with a forest-green cover. The other half were full of doodles, sketches, and half-formed ideas for novels I had tried (and failed) to finish.
I threw the notebook on the bed, changing into my pajamas. Leaning against the headboard of my bed, I opened the notebook, brushed the dust and bits of shaved cardboard off the pristine page, and began to write:
I was thinking this afternoon as I said goodbye to Charlotte (my sister) and Martha (you'll probably meet her, or will have met her already) about the Doctor's former companions. How did they cope with the Doctor regenerating? They left no record, much to my dismay.
Now, I don't pretend to think that I will be the Doctor's last companion. I know, and am resigned to the fact, that he will find others to take my place, probably before the sheets in my abandoned bed are cold. So, I have decided to be the first of the Doctor's many companions to document the phenomenon of a Time Lord's regeneration.
I plan to begin my documentation tomorrow.
Here's hoping that my makeshift guide will help someone! , Molly Goodwin
Satisfied, I closed the notebook and stuck my pen into the spiral.
I felt a wave of tiredness crash over me, and turned off my bedside lamp.