Chapter 4

May 1993

Well, I called to wish Mamí a happy Mother's Day; I could hear them all in the background. They were having a party; I forgot Papí likes to surprise Mamí every year. I wonder what he did this time, she sounded really happy before she knew it was me, then she started crying. Delia got on the phone while Lu and Papí tried to cheer Mamí up. I shouldn't have called but Del said Mamí would have been upset if I hadn't. Ha! I made her cry, how much more upset would she be if I hadn't?

Del's getting married. Papí said it was about time that chijin grew some ho-den and moved it along. I swear he thinks if we get too old no one will marry us. Me? I probably wont have to worry about that since- well, I'm not getting Called so maybe I will end up married .Ketsu imei soshak, having a man telling me what to do. I could probably kick his ass if I had too…

June 1993

I met the Slayer today. Her name is Amaly and she has pretty reddish hair. She looks so pale though… I don't see what the difference is, she looks just like the rest of us, like any other girl only there is something different about her. I felt it when I saw her, like something- some- I don't want to say evil because its not like that but it felt…scary? As if something about her was dangerous even though she looks all innocent.

I didn't really get to talk to her because she was only stopping by, her Watcher is a gray haired lady, kinda stiff and proper like Miss Rayne but she seems nicer somehow. She even said hello to me, asked if I liked the Academy.

I just nodded like a kugutsu but I remembered to smile and be polite. Amaly smiled, like she thought it was funny. She told me not to be nervous and as they were leaving she whispered I should always live as if today were my last day. I wonder why she said that.

Chikushou! Maty's here again so I know its time for training. He has me doing gymnastics, can you believe that?

Amaly was only sixteen when I met her. She was a beautiful girl with medium length red hair, alabaster skin and bright green eyes. She was gorgeous, young… and she never saw seventeen. I remember her being tall though she was one of the shorter one's like me. It must have been the way she carried herself, why she looked so tall. Slayer's have this… words can't describe the way we are, how we feel or live; we are just wired differently.

There were two others during my first three years at the Academy, girls I never met or even heard of. It didn't matter though because I couldn't help thinking of Amaly. I spent nights wondering what she must've been thinking at the end. Had she been afraid? Did she wish she'd never been Called? Had there ever been a moment when she wished she'd just been a regular normal girl like all the rest out there?

All we ever heard was what an honor it would be, how lucky the Potential that was chosen was. There was never any 'bad press', talk of the Slayer that died and there was nothing more embarrassing than a Potential past the age of calling. I'd seen plenty of seventeen and eighteen year olds suddenly pressed into more training- as Watchers. Most weren't happy about it but what else was there for girls who knew what they did? I wondered if I would mind it so much, being a Watcher but it would definitely get rid of that pesky question as to what I wanted to be when I grew up. At least I'd get to live into my twenties, possibly even thirties. I already knew three languages, well two and half of another because Japanese wasn't easy. So being a Watcher seemed like the best road to take and I was ready for it. Even at that young age I knew I wanted to grow old, to see my family grow old and have their own families… Powers That Be certainly have a way of sukurixyu- things up.

Matzuye and I grew complacent in our routine. A morning run then breakfast followed by weapons training; after lunch we had endurance and tactics with maybe a little sparring and by the time it was time to wind down for the day we hit the books. From the very first the Slayer prophecies captured my attention and if Maty didn't insist I read demon classification or vampire lore I would never have known how to kill half of them just by memory.

See, reading does help especially when you don't have to go back and look up what it is that's trying to kill you cuz that usually leads to dying and I really like breathing.

Summer couldn't come soon enough for me especially since it was my first year away and a lot seemed to have happened while I was away. My big sister was getting married and she insisted the family wait for me. Del always thought of everyone, she was the motherly type, trying to keep us all happy and fixing things… She didn't deserve what she got, no one ever does.

July 11, 1993

Delia's getting married! I saw her dress today, we all went to Dońa Lita's shop to get the rest of us fitted. Mar had to have her dress let out, HA! The buta, Mamí heard me say that and she thought I'd said the other word, the Spanish one so I got smacked. She didn't believe me when I told her it was Japanese. Like there was no way I could learn another language, I told her they speak funny English at school and that one of the teacher's is Japanese, didn't matter though and bakabakashii Mar kept gloating. I'll show her…

July 16, 1993

Today is the big day and Del looks so happy. I wonder why Mamí and her are crying but I don't think it's the time to ask. I can't wait for the party.

July 20, 1993

Del's been gone almost a week and the house feels so weird. Lu's been grouchy this week he keeps telling Mar she should be taking over Del's chores since she's the next oldest girl. He saw me cleaning up while she snuck out to meet her boyfriend. Its not puke-face anymore, she got some other boy who looks like he daiben his pants. I don't see why some boys show their underwear and they can't even walk because their pants are always falling off.

Mar got really mad when I said so. She said I was kissing ass and just because I got to go away for school didn't mean I was better than her. I could tell she was jealous but hen she tried to hit me.

Luis would have defended me since she's two years older and she got a lot bigger than I remembered, not to mention wider.

There's no excuse for what I did. I don't even know why I did it but when she hit me I didn't even think. It's all Maty's fault. If he hadn't taught me how to fight-. They looked at me funny. Luis and Lucas because they were the only one's there. I had Mar on the floor, her braid wrapped in one hand and her arm up behind her with my foot on her side. She was screaming bloody murder and then Lu picked me up and I had to let go. My hand wouldn't at first but I made it-.

They looked at me funny. My little brother and big brother, they looked at me funny, like they didn't know who I was.

Am I still me?

I went back to the Academy a year older knowing that I was slowly but surely growing away from my family. Maty was not happy to hear I used my training against a human. I wasn't proud of doing that either but I never expected him to be so harsh. I didn't know then that there had been other Slayers, girls who made no distinction between the supernatural evil and the human evil. They took it upon themselves to right any wrong they saw and protect who ever they perceived as an innocent. He didn't want me to become one of those, the one's that had to be put down for humanity's safety. I hadn't known the Council could do something like that. I just assumed the demons took care of the killing part, killing Slayers.

That last question- Am I still me? – I still haven't found an answer. I knew who I was, who I had been.

I was some one's daughter, that's the first thing I can remember being. My parents worked hard to provide for us. Mamí cleaned houses, Papí worked construction but he hadn't always. He used to tell me stories about before, when he used to work as bus-boy in a fancy restaurant then when he used to wash dishes at the other one. It still bother's him that neither would give him the opportunity to be a waiter, I think the customers would have liked him. Papí can be funny. Mamí did the Tupperware thing for a while but she mostly ended up buying for herself from herself and Papí wasn't too happy with that.

By the time I was old enough to follow Papá to work he was supervisor of a construction company. I remember following Papá all over the sites, walking across beams on half built frames, actually I monkey crawled cuz my legs were too short. Sometimes I helped dig and oh! I loved demolition. Once he had to tear down an entire wall. I couldn't believe he was going to let me bust holes in it. I doubt the Powers That Be had anything to do with that but hitting things- inanimate things- was real fun. Still is but I like when they fight back, makes it more interesting.

I was a little sister and a big sister too. My big brother Luis was…he took after Papí. Hard worker, family oriented… he could've made any girl happy and it was him and Del who had to keep all us young ones in line while our parents were at work. I have to admit I was the bratty little sister but you can't blame me. Lu and Del kept us locked in or tied down but they did have their hands full trying to keep us in hand especially when we were mad at them. Of course they were older so anything we said wasn't believed and that only left us one option; get hurt on their watch. For some reason I was the one always hurt. Roque is two years younger than me and Lucas was too small to hurt purposely so it made sense.

I guess that was the Powers That Be's way of preparing one of theirs for what was to come, yeah total nonsense, I know.

AN: Reviews... I like reviews they tell me where I'm going.