"Computer" Zim demanded
"Yes?"
"Do you know what's wrong with me?"
"No, sir... would you care to elaborate?" The computer answered uneasily.
"Well, I feel this odd pulling in my squeedily-spooch whenever I am near the Dib-human. I don't like it but I need to keep my proximity close to him. EXPLAIN this to the ZIM!"
"I require more information in order to calculate a response." The computer told him flatly.
"He asked me what my favorite color was today. I lied to him, because I wasn't sure what he'd do with such information. I told him that I like silver, but you know as well as I do that my favorite color is GOLD! But I did find his favorite color. It's green. Now what am I to do with this information, computer?"
"I think the whole 'favorite color' charade is a rather apt metaphor..." The computer decided.
"Say what you mean." Zim chirped, impatiently.
"Zim, I believe you're beginning to feel a sense of comradery towards the human. It makes sense logically, as he is the only life-form who shows any sort of interest in your affairs."
Zim scoffed at his computer.
"Just tell me what evil things I can accomplish with the knowledge of his favorite color."
"MASTAH!" Gir cried.
"What is it, GIR?" Zim demanded.
"YOU'RE GREEN, MASTAH!"
Zim looked at his skin, and smiled proudly. "You're right, Gir! I am green!"
"Dib's eyes are gold." The computer added sheepishly.
"You speak nonsense, computer!" Zim bellowed.
"MASTAH LII-IIKES DIB-THING! MASTAH LII-IIKES DIB-THING!" Gir sung in a high-pitched robotic squeal.
"Gir, you may self destruct again." Zim replied angrily.
"YEEE!" Gir squealed as he exploded.
"Computer? Reassemble the Gir, please."
Dib was in his bedroom, watching the scene play out, mouth agape. He didn't know what to make of it. Why would Zim really hide his favorite color? Why was he so fucking guarded? Dib didn't understand him at all. And... where was the squeedily-spooch anyway? It seemed to be the only organ that Zim ever spoke of having. Why did Zim care about color question so much? The only reason he'd asked was to distract them both from all of Zim's annoying rants.
He watched as Zim sat at a computer and type something. Zim pressed the enter button and then sat, eyes glued to the screen. Dib's instant messenger bleeped.
He checked it, and sure enough, Zim had messaged him. Who else would it be? Maybe Gaz randomly insulting him from downstairs or someone from the Swollen Eyeballs... But no, It was Zim's screen name that appeared.
'HumanZIM: Hello, Dib-thing.'
'DIBdefender: Zim? You know I have cameras in your lab, right?'
'HumanZIM: What? Nonsense. I was writing to inform you that my favorite color is gold.'
'DIBdefender:...Zim, I have CAMERAS. In. Your. Labratory.'
'HumanZIM: yes,yes. I have saremac in your yrotarbal.'
'DIBdefender:Why are you talking to me?'
'HumanZIM: It's obviously part of my MASTER PLAN.'
'DIBdefender: Wow you're annoying.'
'HumanZIM:So why don't you log out?
'DIBdefender:...'
DIBdefender is no longer online.