And there it was. He said it out loud for the first time, even to himself. He told Blaine what had gone wrong the other night and what had been prodding relentlessly at the back of his mind ever since. This was not something small and it would be impossible to take back. All he could do now was wait for his words to really sink in to his boyfriend and then the boy would be gone. Even if Blaine did not fully comprehend what he had just confessed, the boy would think he was just being a baby about it all. Who would want to date a baby? Judging by the concerned and caring look in his eyes though, it was more likely that the Warbler did understand that this was more than a simple fear of the pain and body image. In this case however, it would soon dawn on him that not only was Kurt a freak but he would never be able to be with him fully and then he would head straight for the door.

By this point his tears were flowing freely. It had initially felt good to release the secret he had been supressing but now, the realization of what he was about to lose because of it, somehow made him feel worse than before. He curled around himself, pulling his body away from his boyfriend's. He did not want to have to feel Blaine pull away from him.

"Kurt?" He barely heard Blaine's soft voice over the vicious thoughts swirling in his mind and his own sobs. It was not remotely close to being fair that he had to be set apart from his peers in yet another way. He had only just found normalcy in Blaine and now this venomous defect inside of him would tear apart him and his best friend, his boyfriend, that one person he had searched his whole life for. Why was the world so cruel to him? What had he ever done to make this curse settle deep within? "KK, come here," the Warbler continued as Kurt felt him scoot closer and encircle him in those strong arms again. He did not have the will to leave this time. They laid there in the quite for some time. Blaine just held tight while Kurt calmed his tears before speaking again. "There's absolutely nothing wrong with you, Kurt."

"This whole world revolves around sex, Blaine," he responded dejectedly.

"Well it shouldn't," the other responded softly. "But, hey look at me. I don't think you're alone in this feeling."

"What do you mean?" Kurt asked as he curiously sat up and turned to face his boyfriend. Blaine mimicked his position, sitting sideways on the back seat of his car and criss-crossing his legs in front of himself. The Warbler then scooted closer so that their knees touched and took Kurt's hands in his.

"You remember that week last year, after Rachel's party, when I went out with her." Kurt nodded, slightly confused as to where this was headed but allowed Blaine to continue simply because he trusted him. "Well, I was really confused about everything because 'gay' had always fit but then I thought Rachel was cute and we had a lot of fun together and I just really liked her. So, I went online to see if I could find some answers. A few sites listed all the orientations and, you know, cis/trans stuff, with definitions. There was also this other one…..um, have you ever heard of being asexual?"

"N-no," Kurt answered with a small head shake and wide, frightened eyes.

"It's nothing bad or anything. It's just like everything else on the list. I only skimmed over the short definition they had there but it said that for asexual people, sex is not part of any romantic relationship. And it doesn't have anything to do with abstinence, like it's not a choice; it's the way you're wired. It also has nothing to do with physical incapability. Like, you could, just like, um….I suppose it's kinda like how you could date a girl but just like because you're gay, you simply don't want to and you never will. That's all I really remember. What do you think?"

"I, uh, I don't know, Blaine. It's, um….I guess, well it's just a lot to take in to be honest," Kurt stuttered out. His mind was too busy processing the new information that forming complete sentences was a little tricky at the moment. Not that he really knew what to think anyways. The only time he had come across that word before was in biology class. Asexual creatures were ones that just split themselves in half creating perfect clones. They were the less evolved, parasite types. Obviously, the word had more than one definition but Kurt could not rid his mind of the previous, off putting, association. "I'll, um, I don't know. I think I just need some time, okay?"

"Sure, of course. Take all the time you need. There's no need to rush to anything. And I'll be here every step of the way, I promise," Blaine assured with a light smile and a squeeze of their clasped hands.

"Okay," he nodded, still a little unaware of his surroundings due to his occupied mind.

"Kurt? Hey, look at me for a sec." It was not until Blaine said it that he realised he had been avoiding eye contact. He did not quite know why but the conversation had left him feeling a lot more vulnerable than he was comfortable with, even if it was only Blaine he was with. There was something about his boyfriend possible knowing more than he did about something that was an innate and troubling part of him that made him uneasy. He turned to meet the golden eyes looking back at him though. He trusted Blaine and the boy was one thing he could not stand to lose. "I can't be there if you don't let in, KK. So, just don't be afraid to tell me what's going on, good or bad, confused or sure. Just talk to me, okay?"

"Yeah, yeah I will," he nodded sincerely.

"I love you."

"I love you too," Kurt beamed back. He could never say those words without a smile forming on his lips.

"So, what now? Do you want me to take you home or do want to hang out some more?" Blaine grinned back, his tone light as if the previous conversation had never happened. Kurt did not know whether or not he appreciated this seemingly phoney ease. The thing with Blaine though, was that it probably was not falsified in the least. The Warbler had a way of looking on the bright side of things and breathing a light on him and on any situation that Kurt had never before known. Because why should they not be able to hang out like normal? Nothing had changed. He was still the same Kurt he had always been, who Blaine had fallen in love with and Blaine was still the same boy he had fallen for. A single word that he may or may not identify with did not have the power to destroy what they had built. He also did not really want to be alone at the moment. Everything was too fresh and raw. He would be tempted to look up this definition as soon as he got home to his computer but would not be calm or rational enough to deal with the consequences.

"I could use another coffee maybe?" He asked with a shy, hopeful smile.

"My treat!" Blaine stated excitedly and leaned forwards, connecting their lips softly before pulling Kurt from the car and back inside the coffee shop.