Slow, she had said.
Things didn't really slow down. If anything they had begun to move even faster then before. But it was different now. He was much more open with her. Revealed more secrets. She had grown closer to all of them, now that they knew she could be trusted. Because she hadn't told.
It was almost like she was number five.
But not quite. She understood. There were things he could only talk to the boys about.
Since that night…the night she had actually slept, for the first time…she could only sleep if he was there. So she had grown accustom to sneaking into his bed while he slept.
That's where she was going now, carefully walking up the stairs, not wanting to trip in the dark.
"I could get use to this," he whispered when he felt her body next to his. Actually he was already us to it. He couldn't sleep without her now.
"Get use to what?" she asked playfully, snuggling her head in his chest.
"Sleeping with somebody next to me."
"Somebody?" she asked, searching for truth.
"Just you. No one else will do. You know that." He knew what she was doing. And he knew what she wanted him to say.
"Just me…"
"Only you. Your head fits so good on my shoulder."
"Yeah, it does…"
"Besides," he yawned, "I only want the one I love next to me."
Her eyes opened. She must have heard wrong…he didn't just say…he couldn't have said…
Love.
She must have heard him wrong. She was tired; she had to have heard him wrong.
Part of her, the part not completely terrified by that word, wanted desperately for him to love her.
If she was going to love any boy, she knew it would be him…but five months was not enough to love.
Then a thought struck her. A random, crushing, petrifying concept. She could break his heart. All this time she thought it was the other way. She never realized that she could hurt him. But she could. More than he could hurt her now.
Everything had just sped up.
Hadn't she asked for slow?