Getting Back A Lost Love

Chapter Four: Daddy'll Protect You, Daddy Knows

EGL's DISCLAIMER: I do not own this particular song (I own many songs, jut not this one).

Last in Getting Back A Lost Love:

I looked into my mother's eyes and said with all the honesty in the world, "I think she was my first love."

XxX

JACK

Hours later, I was on my way to Tennessee.

I glanced at Jackie, who was sleeping soundly in her car seat. I could honestly say she looked like a little angel. An angel who looked like a mix of my best friend as well as myself.

My thoughts ranged from subject to subject.

I looked back at my memories with Kim, like always the one that made the most glow go off inside of me was the one of the night that Jackie was conceived.

Before Jackie has shown up at my driveway, I hadn't allow myself to think of Kim. It had been a subject that made my chest start to ache and I basically allowed myself to forget about her so that I wouldn't have to encounter the pain the first days without her had brought forth. But now I had to do so.

I was on my way to meeting her and I had to mentally prepare myself for the meeting with the girl whom I had not allowed myself to miss and the girl whom had welcomed my first-born into the world.

My life so far had been quite ordinary, how would it change? Would Mom or Kim expect me to move to Tennessee? As much as I would love to, I couldn't leave my friends and my Mom behind. I couldn't leave my life behind like Kim had previously done. It would be too much for me. As much as I love Jackie and Kim (yes, I love them alright?), I don't think I could make such a big sacrifice as leaving my home.

Now I do realize that it does sound selfish, but I wouldn't be able to. It would mean changing my style of life, and I really don't want to change my life style in that sense.

How could Kim do this to me? How could she? She was supposed to be my best friend! Yet she hadn't uttered a word about it to me, and so hadn't Mom.

What if because Mom hadn't told me. What if I would have never met my little girl? That would have been absolutely horrible, I'm glad I did though.

Kim had promised us that she would be back 'before we'd know it,' but two years had passed and if it hadn't been for Sylvia, I would still be waiting for her appearance.

I wonder if Kim ever regretted having me be her first time. I mean, we were both inexperienced and might not have put on the condom correctly; that would explain how Jackie was alive, or maybe the stupid condom had broken (not that I'm ungrateful).

I'd gotten it out of one of the cabinets (later on I realized Mom had put them there for my use as she didn't need them), but I was high with the thought of making love to Kim. I'm a teenage boy, can you blame me?

I remember how it was like to be with her in silence until we fell asleep. It hadn't been an awkward silence either. Her body was much smaller than mine and I'd used that as an advantage.

During the last two years I'd thought at one time or another that my night

with Kim had been a dream. I mean, how often is it you have a beautiful girl who is your very best friend sleeping in your bed, cuddled into your chest and been able to say that she had been yours first than anybody else's? How many can say that at fourteen they'd felt as if they were in love? Not very many that's who. I remember touching her hair and combing it with my fingers, amazed at how nice it smelled and how silky it was.

I was in the middle of replaying that whole memory bit by bit when I heard Jackie's cries.

I pulled over and got in the back seat. I was feeling horrible for forgetting my Jackie for even a minute.

"It's okay baby. I'm here, I'm here. Daddy's here and I won't let anybody hurt you, my baby girl. I promise, and when I make promises I always keep them no matter what. You know I'll try to be the best Daddy you could ever wish for.

Huh, Jackie? Does that sound good to you baby?"

She became quiet after I reclined the driver's seat and laid her on my chest.

I put her back on her car seat and drove to the nearest motel.

I took the backpack full of Jackie's things as well as some of my own and took a sleeping Jackie out of her seat. I pulled the pink blanket tighter around her and locked the door. Talk about multi-tasking.

Even though it was summer, the night air was quite chilly, so I was pretty grateful that it wasn't very cold inside the motel.

Mom made me promise her that I would take good care of Jackie and 'to return her to her mother just like I'd gotten her.' That meant being careful of the silliest things, such as a slight breeze. It was like she was talking about a dog, but she meant well.

Besides, she's my baby too, isn't she? She sure as heck looked like it.

I spotted the check-in counter and waited in line for a few minutes until it was my turn.

"Hello. May I help you with something, sir?" a woman in her late twenties or so asked me.

"How much a night is a room for my daughter and me?" I asked her and looked down at Jackie to make sure the noise hadn't woken her up.

"How old is she?"

She peered over the counter, trying to get a glimpe of Jacklynn.

"She's a little over a year. She'll just sleep in the same as bed as me."

"That would be a little more than a hundred bucks," the woman who's name tag said 'Ana' said.

"Okay, here," I gave her my credit card.

I gave her my information and she paused when I told her I was sixteen.

"You're sixteen and your daughter's one?"

She scribbled some things in a paper, listening to what I was saying. I'm

glad that she isn't actually staring me down and judging me.

"Uh, yeah," I said uncomfortably as she handed me the key to the room Jackie and I'll be staying in.

"Okay," she said.

"Thanks," I said and turned to walk away.

"Wait," Ana said.

I turned around again.

"Is your daughter's mother coming in later? It'd be nice to have a warning if she is going to join you, or anybody else for that matter."

"No, she isn't coming. Jackie and I are on our own for now."

"That was all. Have a good night and enjoy your stay."

"Thank you. You too, ma'am."

I took an elevator up to my room and Jackie and myself ready for bed.

It's funny how conscious of being naked in front of my girl I was, but hey, I need to keep a very watchful eye on my daughter and I am certainly not leaving her alone even for a moment unless she's being watched by somebody I completely trust. You don't know how many people get kidnapped while they're in their own homes.

I finished getting dressed in sweats and a loose gray sweatshirt when I realized Jacklynn's eyed were opened wide and her little brown eyes were full of unshed tears.

As soon as her eyes landed on me, she let go of the tears she'd been holding back and said,"DADA!"

I ran to her side and picked up my little girl.

"It's going to be okay, baby. It's going to be okay."

I rubbed her back and dragged our backpack across the floor. I sat down at the edge of the bed and took Jackie's bottle out of the bag.

I stuck the bottle in her mouth after I tilted her body in the position it needs to be, but she rejected it.

After twenty minutes of trying some things out, I called Mom for advice. She said that Jackie might just be fussy and tired out.

All the while Jackie had been calling out Kim's name over and over again. I think she missed having her mother around. I know I did.

I laid down on the bed and put Jackie on top of my chest.

Her cries hadn't ceased much after a while of having me move my body beneath hers (sort of like those chairs that vibrate), so I set out to search a song by Eminem somebody close to me had loved.

The Mockingbird song. It was perfect.

Now hush,little baby, don't you cry

Everything's gonna be alright

Stiffen that upper lip up little lady, I told ya Daddy's here to hold ya through the night I know mommy's not here right now and we don't know

Jackie calmed down as the song progressed and eventually stopped crying.

"Do you wanna tell Daddy why you're crying, Princess?" I asked her after the song ended. I knew she probably wasn't going to respond, but Mom had told me to talk to her all the same.

Jackie tried to prop herself up, but failed, falling back into my chest and letting out a slight sniffle.

"It's okay, Jackie. Dada's got you, don't cry please."

I took a hold of Jackie and held her up in the air for a minute, then Set her down gently in between my stomach and my chest in a sitting position.

"Momma," she started out and made a car noise. It took me a while to figure out what she meant, but I figured out that she'd probably had a bad dream about the accident Kim had been in.

"Baby, Momma's alright you know. I promise you we'll see her again soon. Just hold on tight and go back to sleep."

I cuddled her into me and rocked her to sleep the same way I'd rocked her mother to sleep once before.

I promise you, Kim, that wherever you are, Jackie and I will find you, I thought before I fell asleep.

XxX

1) Hey, I know I updated quicker than I promised, but don't look a horse gift in the mouth (hehe I just learned that expression).

My goal of reviews is 17-20.

The most I have received yet is 15, and don't worry about me giving in like this way too often cuz I'm going to start another story. Probably next week or the next, who knows when I'll publish it? The point is that I will be busy and not give in to the temptation of updating this particular fic.

I have another deal for you: get me to my goal in five to seven days or so and I'll make my next chapter longer and try to write as much Kick in it as possible (oops, spoiler).

2) Next chapter we'll see Kim. Don't you think Jack was really awesome this chapter

3) If I REALLY like your review, you might get a sneak peek of next chapter.

For me to like it, it must be-

1: meaningful (it has to really mean something),

2: not one or two words-have a good length,

3: it has to stop my heart and make me say, "wow, I'm that good/I that badly",

4: honesty (that means not sending out many reviews anonymously so that I'll update faster-yeah, I noticed. It also means you give your one hundred percent opinion-I don't care if it says I'm horrible as long as you say nicely and in an honest matter. I WANT criticism-I know I must have at least one or two glitches in my writing-I wanna know).

5) I, emeralgreenlove, hereby promise I will update in five days or seven after I post this or earlier if I receive 17-20 reviews; unless I have been harmed, have an extremely bad case of writer's block and/or encountering technical difficulties.

That's all, good luck and...

REVIEW!

XOXO,

emeralgreenlove.