Breathing In The Snowflakes Four

The restaurant Pitch chose was big, and crowded, and noisy, and bright, but oh so very warm… Jack couldn't be happier sitting directly underneath a heating vent- the waiter asked if he minded it, was he crazy?! It was fantastic! Warm soothing air ruffling his hair; Jack adored this feeling…

And being able to snuggle into Pitch made it even better. Sure, they got a booth and they could have sat opposite each other, but Jack had asked if he'd stay by him. The older man understood that he was afraid of doing something terrible if he became needy again. He agreed, and Jack was currently nuzzled into his shoulder.

"Can I get you two anything?" their waiter came back, smiling a little too widely.

"What do you want Jack?" Pitch asked, nudging the sleepy blonde.

Blinking, Jack sat up and ordered the largest portion of mac and cheese they had. He asked to have five different cheeses on it. "I can get that, right?" he asked Pitch, suddenly remembering who was paying for this. Pitch nodded and Jack smiled brightly. Sure, Jack was old enough where he really should be paying for his own meals, but nobody ever asked if he had the money to do so…

Pitch ordered his food, and not long after they each received their drinks. Jack had gotten hot chocolate. Taking a sip, Jack shivered and grinned at how it burned his tongue. Swallowing, he blew on it a few times to help stop the sear it gave.

The older male rubbed Jack's back and asked, "Everything alright so far…?"

Jack nodded. "It's so warm," he said, "I don't feel like I need anything else right now…" Jack finally felt like a normal person.

The two sat and talked until their food arrived. When Jack got his, those blue eyes blinked rapidly with excitement. He never realized how hungry he was- considering he hadn't eaten all day. He tried to be polite and eat calmly at first, but his hunger beat him and soon he was shoveling food into his mouth. Pitch chuckled at him, asking, "Good?"

Jack grinned at him with full cheeks: Pitch laughed again. Jack was able to finish about half the food before his stomach was protesting with pain. So he leaned back into the cushions and let his head rest on his new friend's shoulder.

"Thank you," he said gently.

Pitch ruffled his hair playfully. "I told you to stop thanking me all the time," he teased, "you're just a druggie and I'm just trying to be nice." Jack smiled a little at the druggie comment, but it upset him to hear that. He didn't want to think of himself as a druggie, but it was probably true…

Their waiter came back, asked if they wanted boxes, as Pitch didn't finish either, and then he asked something that made both men blush.

"And can I offer any dessert to the happy couple?"

Jack's face was beat red- he jumped off of Pitch, arguing quickly that they weren't a couple. Pitch hushed him and said Jack wanted apple pie to take home. Jack said he had never said that, but Pitch hushed him again.

The waiter nodded and walked away, seemingly very pleased at how much he had embarrassed the younger of the two. Jack pouted at Pitch.

"You didn't have to get me dessert," he whined, "I didn't want any…"

Pitch only smiled. "You'll appreciate it later," he said, taking their bill up to be paid. Jack waited in the booth- packing up his leftovers. Pitch came back, asking with a smile, "Ready to go?" The pale haired boy nodded and they walked out together. Jack made sure to pout angrily at their waiter on the way.

As they walked, Jack realized how much colder it was outside than in the restaurant. He rubbed his arms desperately to stay warm. Even though he had a jacket and a sweater, he was still incredibly cold. Pitch noticed and quickly wrapped his jacket around Jack. Now he had three extra warm layers. The smaller male sighed happily at the extra warmth.

"Thanks," he whispered, pulling the fabric tight around his shoulders. Pitch told him it was no problem. They walked back to Pitch's car, and the owner proceeded to turn the heat up for Jack. The blue eyes blushed deeply at how nice Pitch was being.

As he drove Jack home, Pitch noticed that his head kept lulling forward and jolting back. Jack was falling asleep.

Once they got home, Pitch found himself unable to wake such a peaceful looking face. He got out and carefully lifted Jack from his seat. He took him into his apartment and set him down on his bed. He made to pull away, but was tugged right back. Looking down, he smiled a little seeing Jack's sleeping form clinging to him like a teddy bear. Jack was even sucking on Pitch's thumb.

Sighing, the older man sat down and allowed Jack to keep him there. He eventually fell asleep as well. He woke up to Jack whimpering and practically ripping his arm out of its socket.

Jack was still asleep, but the way he shivered and the fact his clothes stuck to him with sweat told Pitch he wouldn't be for long. The blue eyes blinked open a few times and Jack groaned loudly with pain. Pitch stroked the top of his head and went to get Jack's drugs.

Pulling him up into a sitting position, Pitch was afraid when Jack began to shudder violently. He had gone too long without a fix. He was getting to where he had been the other night. Pitch put some powder into his hand and told Jack he needed to take it.

"N-nooo…" Jack groaned, coughing and choking as he tried to breathe in properly, "Noo…" He tried to push Pitch's hand away from him, but he only managed to hit his arm and have both his hands fall trembling to his lap.

Pitch tried to get Jack to breathe in, but Jack wouldn't. His shaking was becoming much worse now, and Pitch could physically feel how cold his skin was, in spite of the sheen of sweat covering it. "Jack, I know you don't want to, but you need it," he told him, making the boy look him in the eye, "You have to take it if you want to get through this."

The blue eyes blinked tiredly at him before they turned away and closed as he inhaled the drug that sustained him. Pitch sighed with relief when Jack did. Sure, they were weaning him off the drug, but waiting until he was this bad probably was doing more harm than good.

The boy moved his white lips as if trying to say something. But he was still not sated, and therefore, only managed to gurgle out nonsense.

Looking down at him, Pitch whispered, "Jack, we can't keep doing this… You have to take it before your body starts shutting down…"

"I don't ever wanna take it again," Jack mumbled, trying to pull away from Pitch and failing.

Pitch forced him to stay in his arms. "Jack, you'll get there, I know it," he whispered, "but right now you've got to keep taking less and less of it every day until you finally can stop…"

Jack sighed sadly. He wanted to go back to that restaurant. Where it was so warm and everything distracted him from the truth. Cuddling in closer to Pitch, Jack reveled in his body heat. He needed somewhere safe and warm and right now, Pitch was the best place he had.

"Was it this bad for you?" he asked gently.

Pitch nodded and said, "Yes… Sometimes it was worse… I'd hurt myself when I needed another dose… I'd wake up after a high and find bruises and cuts all over my body… Friends would tell me I had done it to myself…" Jack felt terrible hearing that, and so he hugged Pitch a little tighter to show him that he cared.

"How…" Jack blushed sheepishly, "How did you first become addicted…?"

Pitch sighed and rubbed his forehead. "It's not something I'm terribly proud of…" he said, "It was after my wife and daughter had both been killed… I needed an escape… And I found the drugs to bring me that… I didn't realize until much later that I was killing myself with them…" Jack felt even worse for him now- pity radiated from the big blue eyes staring up at him.

"I'm sorry for you," he whimpered, trying to nuzzle closer, though he was already squishing the older male he was hugging him so close. Pitch thanked him and let his head fall back.

After a minute of holding onto the warmth, Jack asked, "How come you stayed?"

"You wouldn't let me leave," he grumbled, not looking at him, "You were gripping my arm like a lifeline and sucking on my fingers in your sleep…" Jack blushed at the finger part.

"You could've pushed me off," he grumbled.

Pitch smiled. "I wasn't going to wake you up like that, now was I? That would've been rude," he said. Shifting his weight, Pitch pushed against Jack's shoulders, saying, "Now get off me, I've got to head home…"

Jack frowned. "Couldn't you stay…?"

The yellow eyed man blinked down at Jack's sad and scared face. Sighing, he gave in and allowed him to hug him even tighter.

"I feel safer with you here," Jack mumbled, the left side of his face pressed deep into Pitch's chest, "I don't want that feeling to go away…" Pitch smiled sweetly at that and stroked the top of Jack's head.

They stayed there for a while longer- Jack glanced every now and then at his digital clock. Eventually, though, they had to get up and get ready to leave. Pitch told Jack he couldn't drive him in today- he needed to change.

Jack didn't want him to leave, but Pitch told him he should go with his friends today. It would help him cope. The blue eyed boy wasn't so sure. But, he waited and called Tia to see if she would walk with him. She agreed.

The two were walking together down a sidewalk, Jack fiddling with the bag in his pocket nervously. He was afraid Tia would see it- even though he had made sure to hide it really well. He just didn't want her to be angry…

For some reason, touching the bag made Jack feel like he needed the drug more. He tried pulling his hand away, but it just ended up caressing the flimsy plastic more insistently. Jack was beginning to shiver with fear. He hadn't had his last dose that long ago- he shouldn't be this bad…! He could feel himself sweating now; he wiped his sleeve across his forehead in an attempt to hide it.

By the time he got to the funeral house he was a shivering, shaking mess. He was so afraid. Pitch would notice- there was absolutely no way he wouldn't, but what if Tia or Sandy took the hint? What if they realized he wasn't really sick…? What if… What if… The two words rang through his head in throngs, and Jack found himself clutching his skull to try and quiet his mind.

"Jack? You okay?" Sandy asked, just arriving with them.

Jack swallowed and gritted his teeth. He was developing a migraine. Groaning, Jack whimpered, "My head hurts…" He slipped a little and ended up falling into the wall. His friends were quickly by his side, helping him to his feet and asking him what he needed.

Pitch came to help them, leaving an elderly couple with a polite, "I'm sorry, one moment." They looked insulted until they saw him next to a young man who looked green around the gills. Jack looked terrible.

"Jack, are you feeling alright?" Pitch asked, putting his hand against Jack's forehead. Jack whimpered numbly as his body shook more and the chill stole him again. But he was still sweating- and that made it all so very much worse.

Pitch helped the other two take Jack into his waiting room. They laid him across the couch and Sandy rushed to get a wet washcloth. He set the icy wet fabric across his unwell friend's brow, and Jack moaned uncomfortably at how much colder it made him.

Trying to pull it off, Jack whined, "Coooolld…" Tia pushed the cloth right back into place, and Pitch went to give Jack some tea. The warm liquid helped some, but it obviously wasn't enough.

"Maybe he should go home," Tia whispered to Sandy.

Jack's eyes flew open; he jumped into a sitting position, shouting, "NO! No, I can't go home!" His shoulders were shaking violently now as he yelled, tears running down his face, "I have to work! I can't go back!"

The trembling blonde fell forward, Pitch catching him. The other two were absolutely terrified for Jack's well-being. Jack whimpered into Pitch's ear over and over, "I'm scared. Pitch, I'm scared…" This worried his friends further.

Pitch gave Jack more to drink and he rubbed his back gently. Turning to the other two, he said, "Would one of you kindly tell the Robinsons I'll be with them in just a moment…?" Sandy nodded and hurried out to the old couple.

Jack was still shaking, but not so terribly now. Pitch knew he wasn't but he asked calmly, "Better?" Jack nodded weakly. Tia sighed a little.

"Will he be okay?" she asked, looking at Pitch hopefully. Sandy came back in and waited to hear the conversation.

Nodding, Pitch replied, "I think so… He just needs some rest… Why don't we give him some time alone to sleep this off…?" The two nodded and walked out of the room, glancing back at Jack every two steps to the door, and then watching him with worried eyes from the doorway before leaving.

Pitch squatted down before Jack, blocking his face from view in the doorway, and he carefully took the bag from Jack's pocket. He held out a handful of the powder, and Jack didn't argue this time; he inhaled obediently and let his head fall into the pillows of the couch.

Wiping the white from his mouth and nostrils, Pitch whispered, "I'll be right outside if you need me…" Jack watched him leave, and his eyes fell shut as peace returned to him. Soon that calm transformed into sleep, and Jack was snoring quietly on the couch- bag tucked back into his pocket.