Bitches keep messing up my suit. Firestar thought as he walked around the pimp daddy store for cats. Hmm... should my hat have a band made of Leopardstar's fur or feathers from pretty birdies? Firestar rummaged through all the hats in the store, and he finally decided on Leopardstar's fur. Now whenever they go in battle, they will think he beat the living hell out of Leopardstar. Bitches shouldn't make it so hard to decide. Now, which paw bracelets should I get? Hmm... River Clan's special fish scales bracelet or Shadow Clan's pine needle stuff? Firestar obviously chose the fish scales.

"That will be 27 pieces of fresh kill." the cash register cat meowed.

"Mhm, bitch. I know that." he took out a sack that held exactly 27 pieces of fresh kill. "Let's roll." he said to himself as he grabbed his stuff and walked out like a boss.

"Firestar!" the bottom bitch yelled cheekily at Firestar.

"What bitch?" he grunted.

"Well... It's..."

"What? I got business in River Clan. Better make it fast, bitch." Firestar turned around with a not very amused face.

Sandstorm realized that he was not in a good mood and thought of what to say. "Well, Squirrelflight and Brambleclaw aren't arguing anymore... she just wanted me to tell you thanks for helping her earlier..." Sandstorm shifted her paws.

Firestar's ears twitched as he tried to not reveal his happiness, "Ok. Let me speak to Assfur Ashfur." Firestar ordered and unsheathed his claws in case of the need to slap a bitch.

"Ok."

"Wait!" Firestar bit her tail.

Sandstorm silently winced in pain as she turned back to Firestar. "Y-yes, Firestar?"

Stinkin' ass bitches, they need to wash up, don't get mad when I don't wanna-

"Firestar?" Sandstorm timidly interrupted.

Firestar then realized that he had been standing there and singing in his head for quite a while now. "Oh. Wash up, ho, before you talk to Assfur Ashfur."

"Oh. Sorry, I will do that."

"Better do that, bitch." Firestar mumbled as he walked past Sandstorm to enter River Clan. "SUP, BITCHES~! IT'S FIRESTAR~!" Firestar yowled at the top of his cat lungs.

"Not him again..." Leopardstar mumbled quiet enough so Firestar couldn't hear. "Ok, why are you- What's with the get up?" Leopardstar meowed as she poked his suit and hat.

"Don't touch. That's fine leather right there, ho." Firestar smacked her paws off his suit.

"Hey-"

"Listen, it's none of your business, bitch. I just needed to talk to some of your warriors."

"Don't call me a-"

Firestar exited the den, completely ignoring her. "So, I heard River Clan has nice bitches with big booties (nicer words are being used)." Firestar inspected all the she-cats with cruel judgment. Meh, Willowshine probably has the best chance. "I'll take her, then." Firestar grabbed her by the scruff and dragged her, even though she was resisting.

"Firestar! What are you doing?!" she yowled.

"Bitches don't talk to Firestar like that." he warned.

Willowshine's face grew angrier at his remark, "OH! So you're so cool-"

Firestar interrupted her with a bitch slap to her face. "I said bitches don't talk to Firestar like that."

Willowshine cringed in pain as blood trickled from her nose. It's not gonna leave a scar... Firestar must have known that. He wouldn't purposely make us look ugly. We wouldn't get clients that way. Wait, what if I… "I'm sorry, Firestar." she apologized.

Firestar just replied with a grunt as he continued to drag her through Wind Clan's territory until they arrived at Thunder Clan. "Sup, Bitches. I'm back~!" Firestar yelled at the top of his lungs to draw the attention of the cats.

Murmurs rose from the camp until Firestar silenced them.

"Yes, you are probably wondering who she is. She is a River Clan specialty I picked out just for the clan. I assume Jayfeather wouldn't have a problem with it..."

"But she's a medicine cat like me. We don't care, but she probably will." Jayfeather chimed in.

Firestar gave an annoying sigh. Ugh, is everyone seriously this stupid? "Since when did we care what she-cats think?"

"Firestar..." Squirrelflight walked up to Firestar with Bramblebae Brambleclaw. "W-well, I have an announcement..."

"What?" Firestar stopped ranting to listen.

Squirrelflight looked at Brambleclaw and nodded to signal him to speak, "She wanted me to first tell you that we do still care about our she-cats. Yes, they may be bitches, but we need to keep them happy. They won't want to work for us if they're unhappy."

Firestar rolled his eyes at the speech. Not this again.

"But, I wanted to say that I want the next generation to have a legacy. One generation that will make this clan flourish... we will be above the other clans. But, with that some things must change first." she kept her gaze steady with determination.

That's Squirrelflight. She's been so quiet lately. Maybe she wanted to say this for a while... "What must we change?" he lifted his chin.

Squirrelflight took a deep breath to decide if she really wanted to say this. "I will tell you when so many cats aren't around-"

"AHHHHHHHHHHHH." the clan complained. It seemed as if they didn't like cliffhangers very much.

"Very well." he paused. "You said you did have something you wanted to tell the whole clan. I think you know that you have to no matter what, now." Firestar hinted that she had no choice whether to say so or not.

"Yes..." she let a dramatic silence fill the camp. She could hear the clan's loud breaths and saw their claws digging into the soft earth. "I will be expecting kits soon. They will fulfill the legacy I mentioned earlier..."

"TELL US THE LEGACY, THEN!"

"Haha, no."

Chapter 4 theme- Ass and Titties - DJ Assault