A/N; Well this is chapter four. My computer is finally in its natural place, and thus my keyboard. I still hate typing. More on Kyuubi's perspective and the 'summer' shinigami that hangs around Naruto.
Chapter 4- Career Exploration. Ninjas, lawyers and other careers.
Kyuubi was rolling on the floor of his cage, not caring about his fur or tails getting wet, just laughing. With no intention of stopping. It showed that even though he couldn't majorly influence the life of the boy he could influence subtly.
Really, how many four and a half year olds can, 1.) Prank the old crippled geezer who looked to be a major thorn in his side. 2.) Prank the ANBU. Successfully. As in not caught. 3.) Win in card games against the Hokage. When he was CHEATING! Cheating his ass off no less. 4.) Prank the Uchiha military police. That, the Kyuubi remembered, was especially hilarious. 5.) Break into a place with only a screwdriver and a couple of paperclips?
The answer? No one but his cute wittle jailer, Naruto! He had recently -like just now recently- promoted his jailor from weak, useless excuse of a life form like an amoeba, to something of a retarded goldfish. That was the equivalent of several million years worth of evolution. If only the mental memory capacity of about three seconds.
Feeling his 'sense chains' wiggle, he quickly became a being of grace and dignity. He then closed his eyes. Taking a fox's version of a meditative stance.
Meanwhile Naruto was putting some finishing touches on his bedroom wall. Feeling the 'twitch.' He quickly looked around. Seeing his friend do his embarrassing monologue of being ignored, -again- he quickly smiled.
"So, " he said, dipping the tips of his brush in paint again, "Why me?" Naruto muttered, it was easier to talk aloud, than to talk the other way that 'Kai' had shown him. 'Kai' had said something about, 'freaking furballs,' and 'thinking they're too good for any bi-pedal species.'
His friend whose actual name was too damn hard to pronounce for a human, and thus settled for a basic kappa name that Naruto could pronounce, which was 'Kai.' In kappa it meant flash flood. In human, it meant release.
"Why you, for what, dude?" 'Kai' cocked his head, showing off his blue tresses. At Naruto's grunt, which the cause was he'd just messed up on a couple of trees he was painting, 'Kai' got it. "Oh, that. You mean how you can see me and other supernatural beings?"
"Yes!" He murmured. He'd fixed the tree.
"Oh, you know the Kyuubi -I mean its not like its a big secret or anything, in the supernatural society- being sealed in ya and all. Well, dude, put it this way, while ninja's can use spiritual energy, human beings have to mix it with physical energy. That creates chakra. Kyuubi being a bijuu is part of natural energy, and part spiritual energy. That's the Kyuubi's chakra, dude. Thus your chakra system is like 1/3 spiritual chakra, 1/2 physical chakra, and 1/6 nature chakra."
Naruto groaned. He needed to wash his brush but how to get down?
"Going on, average-wise most ninja chakra is a mix of about 2/3 physical energy and about 1/3 mental or spiritual energy. Even if they say it's half and half dude, they're wrong. Since you have an abnormal amount of spiritual energy for a human, this would make you immune to most mental based attacks. Like the genjutsu. I think that's what the ninjas dudes call it. I call it, at most a pathetic attempt." Well duh, how else would he get anything done for his job, reaping souls, if he was being stopped by ninja? Of course 'Kai' was better. It was necessary.
Naruto was wondering what to do about his brush, his paint and the fact that when he got down from here he was going to fix that problem. How? He could modify a standing lamp into a tall table for temporary use. But where would he put it since one of the people who ran the orphanage would surely break it if he left in here. Or...
"How?" He said, not wanting to get off the stool on the chair.
"A lot of determination, dude, with a bit of skill, luck and talent. Combine that with basic knowledge of how human chakra works, well what I gleaned from a couple of different sources, dude." He said bashful.
"Where?" Naruto asked looking for a particular tube of paint. It was burnt sienna. Possible his favorite color after orange, black, red, silver and blue. He needed it to do detail on a building. After he cleaned his brush. Which meant he had to get down. Down off the stool on the chair.
"Oh, I stalked a couple of those freaky-eyed people, and crashed some classes at the ninja school, dude. " 'Kai' responded.
Naruto glared at him. 'Don't you have a job?'
"When I'm not on call for my job, dude. Duh! I work the oddest hours."
'Freaky-eyed people?' Naruto thought. How many people have ultra-marine, teal blue beckons of light that call themselves eyes? And how many have third eyelids? None that he knew of. Then again he didn't know any other supernatural beings. Then again, they were called super-natural for a reason. Though that was a bigger oxymoron than most. Really, it was.
Suddenly he became aware of someone approaching him. He'd use him to clean his brush, and get the paint. A foxy grin shown on the gaki's face.
A few minutes earlier...
A rather annoyed and thought-occupied chunin and a really short jonin were walking side by side, down the street.
The short jonin said, "So, the guy we're escorting to the tower, for Hokage-sama is important?"
The chunin replied, "Yea, and nay. Depends on who you ask. So Hokage-sama didn't tell you anything about who we're 'escorting'?"
"No." The short jonin admitted. "I was going to give him my mission report, but he sent me to tag along with you."
"Ahh." The chunin said as if the short jonin's answer just revealed the purpose of life.
After a few minutes of walking, the chunin said something else. "The guy we're escorting is one Uzumaki Naruto. Apparently the Hokage is concerned about the guy. I heard a rumor a group of our ninja tried to kill him, so Hokage is taking protective action of his ward."
"I haven't heard that rumor. One would think that I would." The jonin said.
"True, true. You would if the rumor had floated on normal village gossip channels."
"So, what's with the Hokage's ward thing?"
"Oh, that. Easy enough to answer. Each and every orphan, is placed in an orphanage until they've received a basic education. Reading, writing, arithmetic and other stuff to make good citizens. When they reach a certain age to where they could take care of their basic needs is where the ward thing comes in. The orphanage kicks you out once you reach sixteen or so, but most people are adopted out, or have moved out on their own beforehand. The ward thing is if for some reason, you're kicked out or leave earlier, you'll be provided for. Like if you, I dunno, become a genin. You'll leave the orphanage, and have a small apartment provided for you. You'll also get a small stipend until you reach the age of sixteen or become a chunin or higher."
"Hmm. So what's with all the older people hating him?"
"This is where my other profession when I'm not being a ninja is handy. Now give me ten ryou." The chunin said.
"Uhh, why?" said the stotic jonin.
"I want to buy some pocky." The chunin said. The jonin looked at him like he was crazy with an almost patented stare. "Ugh, I mean client confidentiality." The jonin gave the lawyer chunin ten ryou.
"How is it he has a secret so dangerous that you'd have to do that? And doesn't that work the other way around?" The short, stoic jonin asked.
"Blame old Yondy. Now remember bijuu. Then think the word jinchuriki."
"You're imply that-"
"Now don't say that. I'd have to kill you. Hokage's law and all. Now then you want to hear something else I heard interesting about him?"
"Hnn. It doesn't bother me. But didn't you just break that law?"
"No. Those laws were passed to help our temporary 'charge' make friends in his own age group. Also it prevents parents from telling their kids. By the way, word is, from my ANBU pal is that the little guy can tell where they are posted at."
"Really? That's interesting." The stotic little guy said, with as much enthusiasm that could be present at a funeral.
"Well, if you could get past him, you could show your stealth is better than the ANBUs." The chunin said. The jonin didn't respond. "IF you manage to touch him before he notices I'll buy you all the pocky you want for the next month." The chunin said with a sigh, closing his eyes for a few fractions of a second.
When he opened his eyes, a half-second later, the jonin was gone. "Damn, I knew he liked pocky, but not that much." He then continued to stroll lazily to the orphanage.
The pocky-loving jonin snuck into Naruto's closet sized bedroom (actually once was a closet at one time) in the orphanage, intent on his mission. He quickly scanned the room once, twice. He saw a small bed, a small makeshift, milk-crate desk, and his target on top of a stool on top of a chair. He scanned the room was was he saw the wall. He just stared. And stared. And stared.
"Shorty, if you're gonna drool, I'm gonna kick you out." Naruto said.
The jonin quickly turned to face Naruto. "I'm not short." He muttered.
"Are too!" Naruto said cheerfully. "Now could you hand me that cup on the table?"
The jonin handed it to him, seeing no reason not to. "Not short."
"Yeah, you are dude." Naruto said, washing his brush, before getting most of the water off onto towel/rag he had draped over his shoulder.
"I just haven't hit my growth spurt yet. Besides you're shorter than me." He muttered. His eye slightly twitching.
"Uh-huh, I have a reason to be short. I'm not even five yet. Your like what twelve or thirteen or elventyleven? Put this back." He handed the short jonin his cup.
"I'm eleven." The short jonin said matter-o-factly, putting the cup back on the makeshift desk.
"See, you're like three times older than I am. Now can you hand me the burnt sienna dude?" Naruto asked.
The jonin complied, but added. "My name's not dude."
"Well, I don't know it, so you're dude, Mr. Dude. Anyways, since you've got the vest, and all, are you here to take over the freaky-eyed people's spots? 'Cause they kind of suck when it comes to hide-and-go-seek. One's in the tree in the front and the other is on the roof of this place. Besides I think the guy who's supposed to go find them quit a loooooonnngg time ago."
"Hnn." So that rumor was true. "You do know it's considered rude to demand a person's name?" He inquired softly.
"Huh, go figure. But since you're all ninja-awesome and all, and you came to find me, and you don't have weapons out, the old man sent you. SO you should know my name."
'Can't argue with that logic.' The jonin thought, so he said, "My name is Uchiha Itachi." He stuck his hand out to shake it with Naruto's little one. Then realized, 'Wait, weapons drawn?'
"Can't dude-san, I'll fall off." Naruto said, perched on his stool on top of the chair.
"Couldn't you just move your pallet and brush to one hand?"
"Not if I want to save my brush from going through paint." He responded.
"Did you just call me dude again?"
"Can't really remember Mr. Dude."
"Can't you at least say my name? It's Itachi Uchiha."
"Got it, Uchiha-san. Now where have I heard that name before." He put on a serious face for a four-year old. If you could only minus the whisker marks. Then it wouldn't have been so cute.
"From the gossips. I created a big stir when I graduated early." Itachi stated coldly.
"No, not you. I mean the Uchiha name."
"Oh, that. The Uchiha clan runs the military police. Our clan symbol is on the police station, even the MP's uniforms."
"Oh," The blond said. For a few moments he was deadly quiet. You could almost hear the wheels of his mind turn. "Are you here to arrest me? 'Cause I don't think that I they'd catch me that quickly."
"Catch you what?"
"For painting the scene with the fish, and setting up the fisher guy."
"That was you?" Itachi asked incredulously. His dad had raved about that all morning over breakfast. Insulting the Uchiha.
"Yeah, whatever was up there, it looked a lot like those fishing bobs-things I saw a couple of times, so I thought, why not finish the scene."
"But where did you get the fisherman?"
"I got him from one of the rooms at the place that the fishing bob was on."
"The clan symbol is a fan. Not a fishing bobber."
"Oh, sorry. I'll make it up later. How's Tuesday?"
"What?" Itachi asked confused by the words, 'make it up'.
By this time the lazy chunin, had managed to get up to Naruto's room. "Oi, Itachi, is the little runt ready, I've got to take him to Hokage-sama." He opened the door, and started to step in. Missing the littlest kid's face.
"No dude!" Naruto said, reaching out.
The mess above the door, fell on the chunin, while Naruto, fell on Itachi. Since there is a law that states for every action there is an opposite and equal reaction, the stool fell on the makeshift desk, sending a couple of paint tubes and containers on top of the already thoroughly paint covered trio.
As they sorted themselves out of each other, Naruto picked up his paints, quickly putting them in their hiding spots, which were so good, if it wasn't for the two seeing where he put them, they never would have guessed they were there. After all, who'd expect a portion of the wall could be removed? Much less how quickly the he did that, or how well hidden it was. Itachi was mentally kicking himself for missing that.
Fitting that part of the wall back, Naruto picked up the newspaper on the floor. Making a nice, folded pile. The two watched on in semi-shock, after all what sane person could fold a newspaper? The paint splotches were effectively hidden in the pile. Seeing that everything was back in its place and cleaned up, he went into a nearby bathroom and scrubbed his hands, face and hair.
Upon seeing them still standing still he scrunched up his little face, whisker marks and all, "You guys better not be dripping paint on my floor. After all, what would your family say Itachi-san?"
They quickly cleaned up. Or as much as they could. After all, the chunin had a nice yellow smilely face of paint on his back. When it didn't come off with water, Itachi looked at Naruto and Naruto only said, "Oil paint."
About thirty or so minutes later...
Naruto was bored. Itachi, a.k.a. Dude-san had left shortly after bringing him here. He'd talked with the old man for about a minute or so, then left him, the chunin guy, -he was not getting the classification of dude, he wasn't awesome enough- and the old man here.
The chunin and Old-man Hokage were arguing about some grown-up adult person thingy. It obviously involved a bit of papers.
Bored he strolled over to the bookcases, looking at different books and magazines. Seeing an orange one, his favorite color, his first impulse was to get the old man to reach it for him, but he was busy so he went with option number two. He quickly built a small stack, in the shape of a staircase to reach the orange book, and decided since there were two other books beside it he decided they might be worth his time. The spine of the book to the left said, Idiot's Guide to Sealing. Not that he knew what that was. It had a small design on the side along with a picture of a brush. That's what sealed Naruto's interest in the book. The book to the right had a design of the elemental cycle on it, -Not that he knew what that was either- so it went with the stack of what he was going to look through, and possibly keep.
He stuck, the books with pictures on the spine in the universal fern plant -present in every office/waiting room in the universe-, covered the orange book with a magazine, while he stuck the other books back in the shelves.
The Hokage called on him halfway through telling him to put them back, and he put the books back looking sad, while he slumped back to the chair. He then looked the dictionary's picture of sulk-fest. He then started to go through the magazines nearby. Snapping the magazine's pages loudly. The Hokage then looked at him sternly. He then went back to the papers him and the chunin were arguing about.
Now Naruto grinned. He pulled out the orange book and thumbed through it, picking out the few words he knew. He didn't know a whole lot, and eventually lost interest, and was about ready to declare to the world it was boring, but decided against it. He'd show the old man. It was then he decided to throw it at the old man.
He did toss it at the old man, as the old Hokage was turning around about to ask Naruto something that was very important to his future and protection. With reflexes born out of having survived two ninja wars, he dodged the flying orange book.
The poor chunin didn't have that advantage and thus got a face-full of the limited gold edition of the first of the 'Icha Icha' series. Signed by the author.
"Naruto..." The Hokage said, "Why'd you throw that book?" A tick, mark had appeared on his face.
"I was bored, and you both were ignoring me..." Naruto had managed to pull off the puppy eyes no jutsu to perfection only available to those ten and under.
"We were just getting everything ready for a surprise for you. Now how would you like to be a ninja?"
"That would be awesome. I'd be such a cool, super-strong ninja. I could-" He continued on in the way only kids under ten can do.
"Naruto," The Hokage said, trying to get his attention, he repeated Naruto's name, which got the same result. He then proceeded to, "Naruto!" after that the blond, now apparently hyper, shut up. "Now then, would you like to attend the academy to learn to be a ninja?"
"You mean I can?" Naruto said using his puppy eyes again. "But didn't that start like three months ago? Wouldn't I have to go next year?"
"That's where the nice chunin that you hit with that book, would come in. He'd help you catch up to the rest of the class."
"Yeah! The Hokage sees that I'm awesome and now wants me to be a super-strong, super-cool ninja who'd one day take over his job! 'Cause I'm just that awesome!"
The old Sarutobi ruffled his hair. Whatever the old man said after the blond's outburst was tuned out.
A couple of feet away, the chunin was muttering with a huge blush on his face, "Is that possible?" Now positively enamored with the book.
However, in the future, Naruto would think that Jiraiya's books were boring. The two would have many arguments about that.
Omake 1: Come, Come...
Meanwhile in his cage the Kyuubi had -not that you could tell- a blush on his face. He'd yet to see such a racy book, in all his millenia. If he ever got out he'd,... he'd,...he'd...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
The Kyuubi blushed even more, not that you could tell. Advantage of being red, and covered in a fur coat. He'd congratulate the author, and then chain him and force him to write sequels.
However his liege lady might be a little mad at him for allowing that series to continue. She was against that type of stuff. Being female and all. She might leave him in here for goddess know how long, or bump him down to a few tails. He couldn't decide which was worse.
He opened his eye, glaring at his prison bars, and the small sheet of paper that he knew on the other side said 'seal.' The seal's backside formed a small, picture of the face of the person who'd sealed him in here. It then winked at him. Before fading back into the paper.
That was new, Kyuubi thought. The damn seal was setient and proving it. And become more intelligent. Maybe, he should cut his 'watch' time, the seal was able to see and know what was going on when that happened. That could explain how it was evolving. Or the fact that his chakra was mutating it anyway, had been and would continue to, as long as the 'sense chains' were present and in working condition.
Kyuubi decided that all that musing wasn't worth it and thus decided to take a nap. Ignoring the problem, that would in a decade or so manifest itself fully. When that little problem would do more than kick him in the tail region.
A/N; Shows the difference of Kyuubi and Naruto. And if anyone asks, 'Kai' is a surfer type, summer shinigami dude. He says dude a lot. Naruto picked up on that habit of his.
Hopefully this chapter will explain the whole understanding the cat thing. Can you believe that cat communicate using telepathy along with body language, and of course the 'meows'? Naruto can only fully understand, and talk to animals. Any other thoughts tend to run into the species barrier unless the thoughts are really 'loud.'
Also the whole seal thing, it's really only added onto the omake to make an introduction of a character easier. Kyuubi did mention in chapter one that it was partially sentient.