Hi everyone,

I don't think I have anything really important to say, so go right ahead and start reading :)

Thank you!

Sakura knocked on the door of Ino and Sai's home.

Hopefully they aren't still in honeymoon mode, she thought as she waited. The two had just returned the previous day from their almost month-long honeymoon, and Sakura wasn't sure if it were too soon for visitors.

But, she HAD to talk to Ino.

Lucky for her, the door opened, and there stood Sai. He looked very happy to see her.

"Sakura," he said with a bright smile.

"Sai! It's good to see you again," Sakura said,stepping inside the house, shutting the door, and giving him a side hug. She was glad that Sai was more in touch with his emotions now- he was a whole lot more friendly, less awkward, and only called her a hag when he was playfully teasing her. And Sakura had learned how to take a joke a little better.

Just then, Ino appeared at the door beside her new husband. "Sakura!" she said happily. She hugged her best friend tightly.

Ever since the two girls had given up their mutual feelings for Sasuke Uchiha, they had bonded closer than they ever had before. Especially over several afternoons of tea, shopping, and making fun of Sasuke's hair.

"I'm so happy you guys are back," Sakura said, beaming at the newlyweds. "Is it too soon for visitors?"

"Hell no," Ino said. "I just spent an entire month with no one but this weirdo." She nodded in Sai's direction. "I'm ready for some actual human contact."

"Hey!" Sai whined. "I'm your husband! I thought you liked being with me!"

"I'm just kidding!" Ino laughed with a wink.

Sakura giggled. It must be such a great feeling to be married to the one you love, she thought to herself. They sure are lucky to have such a relationship. "Ino, I came here because I have something I have to talk to you about," Sakura said, growing serious.

"Hm?" Ino looked very interested. "What is it?"

Sakura's eyes flashed to Sai. "Well... it's kind of 'girl talk,'" she hinted.

Sai just stood there and listened, as oblivious as ever.

Ino cleared her throat loudly. "Oh, GIRL TALK. So you mean, NO GUYS ALLOWED?" She enunciated each word clearly, her eyes flickering to her husband.

Sai just stood there and smiled. He didn't seem to be taking the hint.

"Oh for heaven's sake!" Ino finally snapped. "Sai, upstairs! Sakura and I have some things to discuss!"

Sai's face fell. "But... But..." he weakly protested.

"You can hang out with us when we're done! Go upstairs!" Ino demanded.

Sai's shoulders slumped. "Fine," he grumbled,

"Sorry, Sai!" Sakura called as he dragged his feet up the stairs. When they heard the bedroom door shut, Ino and Sakura sat on the couch downstairs.

"So," Ino said. "What's up? Is everything alright?"

Sakura sighed. "You'll never believe what Sasuke said to me today," she said, rubbing her temples with her fingers.

Ino's eyes widened. "What? What did he say?" she asked eagerly.

"Well, first of all," Sakura said, "he confessed to me yesterday."

Ino stared at her in shock. "No way..." she breathed. "That is crazy! What did you say?!"

"Well, I turned him down, obviously," Sakura said.

"Good," Ino said. "That Sasuke doesn't deserve you."

Sakura smiled weakly. "His confession is nothing compared to what he said to me today," she said.

"What did he say?" Ino asked.

And Sakura told Ino the whole, strange story of her escapade at the marketplace.

Ino stared at Sakura, her mouth and eyes wide open in amazement. Then, she exploded. "ARE YOU KIDDING?!" the blonde cried. "DOES HE HAVE NO RESPECT FOR WOMEN?!"

"Apparently not," Sakura sighed.

"Good thing you gave him what he deserved," Ino said, flipping her hair. "Hopefully he's learned his lesson."

Sakura nodded her head. "I'm just really upset about this whole thing," she said glumly. "I mean, I really was happy when he came back, because I looked forward to getting to know him as a friend. But... apparently he still doesn't care enough for me to even want that. It seems like all he wants is... well, to put it bluntly, sex." She pursed her lips.

The two women were silent for a while as they both thought about this.

Suddenly, Ino bristled. "Sai!" she yelled. "Stop being nosy! I know you're there!"

Sure enough, when the two friends looked at the top of the stairs, Sai was peeking out at them from behind the wall. "Dammit," he growled, sneaking back into the bedroom.

When Sai was gone, Ino spoke up again. "What about Naruto?" she asked in a hushed tone. "Do you still...?"

Sakura's lips twisted into a weak smile. "Yeah," she said, not looking at her friend.

"How does he feel?" Ino gently prompted.

Sakura's eyes were downcast as she spoke. "You should hear the way he talks about Hinata," she said. "Plus, she's always been there for him, has always been patient with him. She deserves him more than I ever will."

"Does he know how you feel?" Ino asked.

Sakura just shook her head. "He never will," she said. "I don't want to ruin what I already have with him. Besides, I'm just happy that he's happy. And I'm happy for Hinata. She's loved him forever."

Ino sighed. "You know, I'll bet if you never told him that he was like your brother, he would consider you," she said matter-of-factly.

"I know that!" Sakura said defensively, glaring at her friend. Then, her expression saddened again. "Like I said, I just want him to be happy. And I'm sure that I can never make him happy the way Hinata does."

"This whole thing is a mess, isn't it?" Ino said. "Add Sasuke into the equation, and it's an absolute catastrophe."

Sakura groaned. "Please, don't remind me of that imbecile," she droned, rubbing her hands over her face.

Ino giggled. "This will all be over someday," she said kindly. "Just hold on."

Sakura smiled up at Ino. "Thank you," she said softly.

xXx

It was well into the evening, and the sky was beginning to darken.

But who would be out after an entire day of training, still giving it his all?

None other than Rock Lee.

The young taijutsu fighter was walking on his hands down the street, yelling something about youthfulness, when he suddenly heard a weak, pained groan.

At the sound, Rock Lee jumped back onto his feet. "What was that?" he asked himself, alert and ready to attack whatever may jump out at him.

Suddenly, there was another groan. Lee whipped his head in the direction of the groan.

It was coming from Sasuke Uchiha's home.

Without hesitation, Lee rushed to Sasuke's porch and began rapping on the door. "Sasuke Uchiha!" he called dutifully. "It is I! Rock Lee! Please let me in so that I may offer my assistance!"

There was no reply.

So, naturally, Lee opened the door and invited himself inside, only to see the young man, lying on the ground.

Sasuke looked terrible. His face was pale and clammy, and his breathing was heavy. Lee's round eyes examined the situation, and they landed upon a large, wooden crate with five tomatoes inside.

Sasuke was also holding a tomato in his hand. He hadn't noticed Rock Lee, as his tummy ached fiercely. But that didn't stop him from lifting the tomato weakly to his mouth.

In one swift motion, Lee was crouched at the Uchiha's side. "Sasuke, do not eat that!" Lee snatched the tomato out of Sasuke's hand. "You have clearly eaten too much already!"

Sasuke winced and clutched his tummy. "Give it back," he muttered, almost inaudibly.

"I will not," Lee said. Sasuke weakly tried to take the tomato back, but Lee held it out of his reach. "Too much of a good thing can be a very terrible thing. A very terrible thing, indeed."

Sasuke sighed, He tried to sit himself up, but ended up making his tummy cramp even more. He grabbed his stomach and curled up onto the floor, trying to hold back his groans of pain.

"Allow me to help you, Sasuke," Lee said. He placed his hands underneath the Uchiha's shoulders, lifted him into a sitting position, and propped him up against the wall.

"Thanks," Sasuke slurred, his eyes half-open.

"Sasuke," Rock Lee said, ignoring Sasuke's thanks. "Why would you do such a thing to yourself?"

Sasuke feebly wiped the sweat from his forehead. "I don't want to talk about it," he said, his voice shaky.

Just then, Lee noticed a large, purple bruise at the base of Sasuke's jaw on the left side of his face. "Sasuke, what has happened to your jaw?" he inquired, reaching out and lightly poking the bruise.

Even though Lee barely touched the bruise, Sasuke felt a searing pain shoot through his jaw. "Ow!" he exclaimed. When he yelled out, he felt a pang in his stomach, and hugged it tightly with his arms.

"Please do not be angry, but I saw everything that happened at the market with you and Sakura," Lee finally admitted.

For a moment, Sasuke froze. Dammit! This is humiliating! He glowered dangerously up at the thick-eyebrowed man. "Why are you bringing his up?" he said with strain.

"Because I want to know if that has anything to do with the situation you are in," Lee stated.

Sasuke sighed and ran a hand down his sweat-covered face. "I don't want to talk about it," he said for the second time.

"Sasuke, if I may," Lee said. "I have some advice I would like to share with you."

Cringing, Sasuke sat up a bit straighter against the wall. "What do you know about it?" he said accusingly. "You've never had a girlfriend."

Lee ignored Sasuke's rudeness. "I promise, Sasuke. You will not be sorry if you listen to my advice."

"Well... I suppose I have nothing to lose," he said reluctantly.

And so, Lee began. "The art of courting requires seduction," he said. "There are many ways to seduce a woman, but here is the way that works the absolute best."

Although his tummy was still in fierce pain, Sasuke listened intently as Rock Lee shared his advice.

"You must sneak into her house without her knowing," Lee continued. "Go into her bedroom, and find where her underwear is stored."

Thinking of Sakura's underwear made Sasuke perk up even more. "Go on," Sasuke prompted, very interested already.

"You must take all of it," he said. "Every last pair."

"Every last pair?" Sasuke asked.

"Every last pair," Lee confirmed. "After that, you must hide them in your bedroom and leave her a suggestive note of where she can find her panties. She will make her way up to your bedroom to take them back. And when she enters, she will see you on your bed, surrounded by all her underwear. It also helps to have a rose in your teeth to give her."

When Lee was done speaking, Sasuke looked at him questioningly. "That seems weird," he said bluntly. "You... you really think that'll work?" he challenged.

"I do not doubt it," Lee said with a firm nod.

Sasuke sighed. "One other thing..." he said. "I said something, and Sakura got really mad at me. Should I tell her I'm sorry?"

"No!" Lee said, almost too quickly. "Do not do that! That will just make things worse!"

"But I think she may want an apology," Sasuke said, feeling confused. "And I am sorry, even though I really don't know what I said that was so terrible..."

"She will get angrier if you bring it up again. It is best to simply leave it alone!" Lee insisted.

Sasuke paused. staring up at Rock Lee's face. He seemed very convincing, but Sasuke still wasn't sure he trusted this advice. "Are you sure you aren't lying?" Sasuke asked suspiciously. "Last I checked, you also had feelings for Sakura."

Lee abruptly stood, positioning himself in a fighting stance. "I shall focus on my training," he said, throwing a punch in the air, "with absolutely no distractions!"

Sasuke nodded his head. "Somehow, I believe you." All of a sudden, Sasuke remembered something; Sakura had set her groceries on a bench, then had walked away without them. "She forgot her groceries," Sasuke exclaimed, forgetting his tummy pain for a moment.

Lee's eyes flashed down to the pathetic Sasuke. "What did you say?" he inquired.

Sasuke ignored him. "Lee, help me up," he demanded.

Without question, Lee leaned down and practically lifted Sasuke off the ground. Sasuke almost cried out from the pain that shot through his stomach, but bit his lip to stay silent. "Thank you for your advice," Sasuke said. "I have to go now."

Lee bowed deeply to Sasuke. "Anything for my comrade," he said. "Please take it easy, my friend." And with that, Lee bounded back outside to continue training.

Luckily, when Sasuke painstakingly made his way back to the marketplace, by some miracle, Sakura's groceries were still placed in the exact same spot on the bench, untouched. So he took them and made his way to his teammate's home.

xXx

After talking with Ino, and then having a meal with her and Sai, Sakura made her way back to her home.

Only to see the last person she wanted to talk to.

Sasuke was standing, leaning against the wall of her house, holding a familiar brown paper bag full of groceries. Much to her satisfaction, she could see a huge, dark bruise where she had punched him.

"What do you want?" she demanded.

Sasuke held out the bag. "You forgot this," he said. She noticed that he was shaking, and he talked as though he had just run a marathon.

"Thanks," she said shortly, snatching the bag out of his hands. He wiped the sweat from his face. He looked paler than usual, and his eyes were glazed over with pain.

Sakura was now starting to feel a bit concerned. "Is everything okay?" she asked worriedly.

"Everything is fine," Sasuke said unconvincingly. "Why?"

Sakura furrowed her brows. "You really don't look so well," she replied.

"I'm... I'm just great." Sasuke winced. "I just wanted to make sure you didn't forget your groceries. I would hate for you to starve."

Sakura stared suspiciously at him. "Well, thank you," she said slowly, "but that doesn't make up for the way you acted today."

Sasuke looked sadly down at his love. Okay. Remember, don't apologize. "I'm going home now," he said mournfully, turning to leave.

But Sakura placed a gentle hand on his shoulder.

Sasuke stopped, feeling his cheeks growing hot at her touch. His heart began to pound hard inside his chest.

"Come inside, Sasuke," Sakura said, her voice comforting. "Maybe I can help you." Was she still pissed at him? Sure. Had she wanted an apology? Hell yes- in fact, she expected Sakura was a kind person, and she couldn't just let Sasuke suffer without at least trying to help him, even if he had acted like a total dick.

Sasuke gulped nervously. "Okay," he said, his voice wobbly.

Sakura gave him a tight-lipped smile as she slid open her door and lead Sasuke inside by the hand, causing Sasuke to blush an even redder shade. She set her groceries on the floor next to the door, then put her arm around Sasuke and helped him to the couch. He flopped over onto it, clearly in a lot of pain.

"My goodness," Sakura said, clucking her tongue. "What happened? You seemed just fine earlier."

Sasuke hesitated, embarrassed about the whole situation. But, he figured that as she was a medic, she may be able to help him feel better. So he uttered a one-word explanation: "Tomatoes."

Sakura stared at him, a puzzled expression on her face. "Were they spoiled?" she asked.

Sasuke shook his head. "Too many," he said.

"How many would you say you had?" Sakura asked.

Sasuke thought for a moment. "I lost count," he said. "But... maybe seventy. Or more."

Sakura's jaw would have hit the floor, had it been physically capable of doing so. "What?! Sasuke, you have to be exaggerating!"

"Well, give or take," he said, trying not to get even more embarrassed by Sakura's reaction. "I bought all the tomatoes in the market."

"WHAT?!" Sakura screeched. "Sasuke, of COURSE that's going to make you sick! You can't eat too many!"

Sasuke frowned, but didn't say anything.

"Ugh," Sakura rolled her eyes. "You should have been resting in the first place. You shouldn't be leaving your house and roaming around while you're sick." She made her way into the kitchen, shaking her head with disapproval. When she returned, she was holding a bottle of pills and a glass of water.

"Here," she said, shoving the water into Sasuke's hand. The young man forced himself to sit up as she opened the pill bottle and shook two of the small white pills into her hand. "Take these painkillers. This is about all I can do for you," she said, placing them into Sasuke's other hand.

"Thank you," Sasuke said. He threw the pills into his mouth and swallowed them with a gulp of water.

Without another word to Sasuke, Sakura left the room again. When she returned, she was carrying a large quilt.

"Lay down," she commanded, pointing at the couch. Sasuke obeyed. "You can stay the night if you want," she said curtly. "I don't want you up and about while you're feeling ill." She unfolded the quilt and draped it over Sasuke's body.

"You're very kind, Sakura," Sasuke said. "Thank you."

Sakura furrowed her brow. Honestly, I feel like I'm taking care of a two-year-old, she thought disapprovingly to herself. "Get better quickly," she said to Sasuke. Then, she turned off the lights, drew the curtains, and left the room.

Sasuke snuggled into his blanket and listened to Sakura's footsteps, moving down the hall. He heard a door open and shut.

She must be in her room, Sasuke thought to himself as he stared into the darkness. Longingly, he imagined being there with her, snuggling up to her and falling asleep in her arms. How amazing that would feel.

But simply being in the same place as her would have to do. Smiling to himself, Sasuke drifted off into a deep, peaceful slumber. Maybe today hadn't been a complete failure after all.

And he was sure that things would advance further once he actually did what Rock Lee told him to do.

I know that I'm the one doing this and all, but oh, how I cringe for Sasuke.

Also, Hanmac: I completely agree! I actually don't mind SasuSaku, but I felt like Sasuke had to get a taste of his own medicine. Karma is a bitch! He can't get everything he wants too easily after all he's done, am I right? ;D

I hope this chapter wasn't too terribly boring :) Thanks for reading!