Hi everyone ! Thanks for all your support. :) I'm sorry to make cry some of you, but I'm happy you're liking my story.
So now, enjoy ! :)
Forget me
Laura's POV
I'm reading my tweets, I'm so happy for all the support from my fans, I love them so much. Even if some of them are breaking my heart, they are saying they are crying for me because they don't want me to die … I can't help but tears come in my eyes, they are so touching.
« Laura ... »
I heard Ross but I don't want stop reading all my beautiful tweets.
« Laura ? I need to talk to you. »
He seems to be serious, I think he wants to tell me something important because his voice breaks when he says that. So I look up at him. And his face is really serious, it scares me a little ...
« What ? You have a weird face. »
« I ... I just want to say you … that I'll miss you so much if you die. Because … I really care about you, well, I mean, I really really care about you. These last days, I realize I feel more than friendship for you and I want ... »
« Shh... Stop. »
I couldn't believe what he had just said, I'm really in shock. I should stop him before he continues, I don't want him to feel that for me, he can't ! Why is he making that to me ?!
« You can't make this to me ! »
When I shout to him, tears fall on my cheeks. I can see him look at me in shock and I even can see he tries to not cry. That's breaking my heart to see him like that but I can't.
I go out of his car and run to my house. I can hear him going out of his car and shout behind me.
« Laura ! What's going on ?! Laura ! »
When I'm in front of my door, I put my hand on the door handle. That hurts me to hear him shout on me with lack of understanding and with his heart broken. I want to jump in his arms and explain him my reaction. But I can't, for him …
So I open my door and enter in my house. I'm now face to him.
He runs to me, he has tears in his eyes. I should be strong for him, I can't let my feelings get the upper hand. So I close my eyes to not see him so broken anymore. I begin to close my door.
I whisper him something really low, I'm not sure he hears me …
« Forget me ... »
« LAURA ! WAIT ! PLEa... »
I close my door just before him. I heard him shout my name behind the door. I put my hands and my head against the door and I cry so much.
It's really hard to see him like that, I really don't like this, but he can't have feelings for me, not anymore …
He beats at the door and continue to shout. It's really hard to not open the door and take him in my arms …
More he shouts, more I cry. Strength leaves me, I can feel that my legs can't support me anymore, I collapse on the ground always against the door.
After a moment, I don't heard him shout or beat anymore. He maybe left. But I don't heard him driving away. I think he's just behind my door. But I don't know why he stays here.
I really want to know but I can't see him. It's maybe for that he stays here, he wants me to worry for him and go see him. But I can't do this.
So before I crack, I leave the door and go in my bedroom.
On my bedroom, there are many pics. Most of them are Ross and I. I take one of them in my hands. Fans don't know about this one, we keep it secret because of all Raura shippers, we knew it kill them of feels. That's Ross who was behind me, with his arms around my shoulders and smiled like an idiot. That's a good memory...
That makes me cry a lot, because I miss the time where we were just happy and so close because we didn't know about my disease …
I want Ross out of my mind. So I go to my piano and begin to play. When I play piano and sing, that helps me to forget. But this time, that doesn't work, because everytime I play or I sing, it reminds me Ross … So I cry much …
After one hour to cry, I look through my window to see if Ross's car is always here and the answer is yes. He just stayed here.
The truth is I'm in love with him for a long time now. But I never had the courage to tell him, I was scared he doesn't feel the same way and we were so close, I didn't want to lose it.
But now, it's too late to be with him, I mean, like a couple. I thought he considers me just like his best friend but nothing more …
I was happy he didn't share my feelings, I was sure I could count on him without him suffering too much. But he has feelings for me now and I don't want him to suffer if I die because I love him and I want the best for him …
I should keep my distance from him, I should tell him to forget me even if that'll be really hard for me … I just hope he'll understand me …
I decide to stay in my house for a few times, just the time for Ross to forget about me.
But he continues to call me, text me or come to my door to talk to me. But I just ignore him.
That's scaring me because that made already one week I stay here without talking to him and he continues, he doesn't give up…
Raini is coming to see me and tries to talk to me.
« Are you okay Laura ? »
« Yes »
I have a little smile on my face and I see Raini frown, I think I didn't convince her …
« Laura, I know you, what's going on ? »
« Well, you know, my cancer »
« No, I mean, what's really going on ? You were always with Ross since you have learnt for your disease and one day you just stay in your home and Ross seems really sad. So tell me what's going on ? »
I sigh, she knows me too well. After all, I think that it can help me to say to someone what I'm feeling right now.
« Okay, you're right. Ross tells me he feels more than friendship for me ... »
She has an understanding look on her face.
« You should be happy, you're in love with him, right ? So why are you so sad about it ? »
« Well, I don't want him to suffer ... »
Tears fall on cheeks. I close my eyes and begin to tremble. Raini sighs and takes me in her arms. I put my head on her shoulder and my arms around her.
« Oh, I understand ... »
« It-It's really hard to-to not see him, I-I love him so-so much, I-I miss him … »
I suffocate a lot because I cry so much. Raini strokes my hair.
« I know … But, maybe that can help you to overcome this hard moment ... »
« Su-sure that can help me, bu-but I really don't want hi-him t-to suffer... »
Raini tightens me stronger in her arms. I'm happy to talk to her. I'm happy to have someone even if she is probably suffering too but I can't help her but to be my friend. We are so close since so much time now, if I keep her away from me, she'll certainly smash my door and force me to stay with her.
« I understand you want to avoid him, but you can't spend, I'm sorry to tell that, the little time you have left in your bedroom. »
I sniff and step back to her for looking at her in the eyes.
« You're right, maybe we can go somewhere, in your favorite store ? »
She wipes my cheeks with her thumb which are full of tears. She looks at me with a small smile.
« Sure, honey. But you can't go with this awful face. »
I nudge her in the arm. She laughs at my action.
« I'm serious, look at you in the mirror. »
I stand up to go in my bathroom and what I see in the mirror scares me. My hair are messed, my eyes are inflated and red, my nose is red too because I cried so much this last week.
« You're right, I'm really awful ! Let me arrange this and we can go ! »
I shout it in order for her to hear me.
« Okay, I'll wait. Oh ! And take a shower because … uhh … your smell is a little … you know what I mean ... »
I smell myself and she's right … again, I stink a lot. So I undress myself and enter in the shower.
I let the water fall on my skin. I should admit, feeling hot water on me makes me feel good. I close my eyes and lift my head to feel the shock of the water on my face like all my sadness will be gone with this.
But, that doesn't work, Ross is always on my mind, he doesn't leave … And like everytime I'm thinking of him, I feel my heart beating faster and my stomach tightening.
I look down to my body and I look at my naked body. I'm asking myself what he's looking like naked. I close my eyes and imagine him. His pecs, his abs, his strong arms ... his big cock.
Think about this make me shiver, I could feel my pussy becoming warm and wet. I stroke it to stop this but that doesn't help. I begin to enter my fingers into me when I heard a knock on my door.
« Have you finished ?! »
Even if she can't see me, I can't help but blush.
« Almost ! »
Well, not really. I wash my hair and my body really fast and got out of the shower. I dry myself, put on clothes, do my hair and make up myself quickly. And I go out of the bathroom to join Raini.
« I'm ready, we can go. »
She nods, takes me by the hand and pulls me.
She opens the door and what I see lets me in shock. I can't move anymore, my eyes and my mouth are wide open. Ross is here.
« Laura ... »
I look away from him, I can't continue to look at him, otherwise, I'll crack and I don't want this. So I left the room by running.
« Laura ! Please ! »
I look while one second behind my shoulder. It's stronger than me, I should look at him, it's like an essential need. I see Ross tries to enter to follow me, but Raini block him with her arm.
« No Ross, please, it's not a good idea ... »
I go in the kitchen, I feel really bad because I see … pain in his eyes, he seems so broken ... like I am …
I hear Ross and Raini talk.
« Please Raini, I need to see her. »
« No Ross, you should move on, it's better like this. »
« But why ? I want to understand. »
I shiver, I'm scared Raini told why I'm avoiding him and if he knows, that'll be harder for him to forget about me …
« Because... the truth is … she doesn't like you, she never did. She pretends to be your friend for the show. So now, move on Ross. »
It's maybe weird, but even if I can't see him, I can feel his heart broken by what Raini just said. It's like, we are connected …
Ross doesn't respond to Raini, the silent takes just some seconds before Raini closes the door but that seem like so more times. It's hard for me too because I love him, really, and I'll die knowing he thinks I hate him …
Raini joins me in the kitchen. She seems to see all the pain I feel.
« I'm sorry to tell him this, but if you wanted to keep him away from you, I think it's done. But, I understand if you hate me now ... »
« No, of course not. It's true I'm suffering but you make the good choice. Thanks Raini. »
She approachs me and strokes my arm.
« Are you always okay to go to the mall? »
I nod.
« Yes, that can help me to make me feel better. »
« Good. »
We stay a little, just to be sure Ross is left and then, we left.
On the road, none of us talk. I look through the window and think about Ross. He won't go out of my mind.
We are now on our favorite store and we try so much clothes like usual. But that's not the same. I try to laugh or even just smile, I really try, but I can't, I'm so sad to not see Ross anymore.
He was the person who wakes me up all mornings, who makes me laugh and smile every moments, every day. But now he doesn't want to be with me anymore, my world is like … dark. And with my cancer, that doesn't help me to be happy.
After trying all clothes in the mall, we decide to go in the snack-bar next to the mall to eat something.
We seat and take our order. We talk a little. But in the middle of the sentence, Raini stops to talk and look at the entrance in shock.
I suppose it's a big celebrity or something so I try to look but Raini takes me by the arm so that I continue to look at her.
« I thought to see a spider but no, I was wrong. So I talk to you about George Clooney ... »
That was a little weird. But I continue to listen to her because I really love George !
But suddenly I hear a voice I know too well.
« Please Calum, I'm not in the mood to eat in town and pretend all is okay. »
I turn to this voice in shock.
« Exactly, that can help you to think about something else. »
« But I can't help but think about her, you know what I... »
Ross sees me and is in shock too. I turn to Raini.
« You knew this ?! »
« No I swear ! »
I get up and ignore Ross so that I can go out of the place. But Ross catches my arm and pulls me in a little street not too far away. I shout at him so many times to leave me alone but he's really strong and he lets go of me only when we are in the street.
« Now, I want explanations ! »
« Raini already told you, so now I want to go ! »
I try to pass but he blocks me. I want to cry but I can't in front of him …
« NO ! I can't believe this ! I know you weren't pretending with me, not pretending to be my friend ! We live so many things before and even after all of this ! I don't believe this ! I can't belive this ! »
Tears fall down on his cheeks now. That's breaking my heart to see him like that. I look away, I don't want to look at him in the eyes.
« Laura, I-I love you ! »
My heart beats really hard in my chest, I want to jump in his arms and tell him I love him too, but I can't … for him …
He takes my shoulders between his hands and searches my eyes in order for me to look at him but I avoid him.
« I really love you Laura ! More than anything ! And I'm really sorry for not realizing my feelings before, before I knew for your cancer, but all I want know, it's to be with you and enjoy every day, every hours, every minutes, every seconds with you, I want to enjoy you before you … before you die. Because I love you Laura. »
Tears fall down on my cheeks too now, I can't help but cry and be touched by what he says.
« I want to kiss you all the time, take you in my arms when I want, well, I already did this, but I really want to be with you Laura. So please, tell me the truth, tell me why you're avoiding me. »
I look down, close my eyes and sigh. I don't know what to do, I'm hesitating now ...
« If it's because you don't want me to suffer, don't do this. Because, if it's your last moments, I want to live them with you. »
I looked up at him, he just answers to my hesitation.
« Like you look at me, I think I'm right. Laura, you can't keep it away from me, because I'll always be with you. »
I'm really touched by what he said. I can't help but jump in his arms this time. I put my arms around his neck and he puts his arms around my waist.
« I'm sorry Ross, but I don't want to you suffer, because I love you too. »
He hugs me stronger.
« You know, I was really devastated, my heart was totally broken, all I see was dark. But I really realized you are really important to me and I didn't want that to be the last time we see eachothers. So I fight to see you again, I want you in my life as long you are alive. When Raini talked to me earlier, I thought some seconds that life was no longer importance for me. But I thought at all we lived and I couldn't believe this. But I understand you, if I was you, I would have done the same thing. »
« So, are you forgiving me ? »
« Of course I'm forgiving you but promise me to let me in your life. »
« I promise. »
He steps back to me and takes my head between his hands. He puts his forehead against mine. He looks at me in the eyes.
« I love you Laura. »
« I love you too. »
Then, he puts his lips against mines to give me a passionate kiss.
I'm happy now because I know he will always be here for me and never lets me down...
So, Laura and Ross are finally together ! But how will they live with her cancer and her probably death ? How will they live her surgery ? Will she survive to this ? If she survive, how will they live all these chemiotherapies ? … There are so many questions. But if you want answers to them, continue to read my story and you'll know ;) Well, only if you want I continue, tell me in review if you really want this please, I need to know …
Love you guys 3