"What the hell, Shikaku?" Minato hissed at his roommate, glancing from the kitchen into the living room where Shikaku's girlfriend, a dark-haired woman named Yoshino, and Minato's three, precious, innocent students stood awkwardly. "I know I didn't give you any warning, but you have a room, Shikaku!"

Shikaku rubbed his neck sheepishly. "It seemed a little fast, to take her to my room. Too troublesome."

Whirlwind Kushina arrived, and she made her presence known by smacking Shikaku upside the head and leaning against Minato's arm. "Shikaku, you can't just feel a girl up on the couch." Her violet eyes narrowed as she pouted at Shikaku. "And Mina-chan, you should really go talk to your students. I think Obito-kun and the quiet one are going to kill each other."

Minato cursed under his breath and – after shaking Kushina off his arm, god, how was she that strong? – darted into the living room. He could hear Shikaku and Kushina arguing quietly, but ignored them in favor of pulling Obito and Kakashi apart. "Obito-kun, Kakashi-kun," he reprimanded. "If you get into another physical fight, I'll have to tell Sarutobi-sensei and you two will get detention again."

Kakashi snorted quietly and looked away. "Isn't this already punishment enough?" He shoved his hands into his pockets and surveyed the room, dark eyes narrowing as he took in the messy living room: a silk, pink robe tossed carelessly over the couch (Inoichi's), Vogue magazines covering the coffee table and spilling onto the floor (Inoichi's), a hair straightener on top of the coffee table (Shikaku's surprisingly, and also probably a fire code violation) and – oh dear, sweet kamisama, was that one of Kushina's porn books?

Minato sighed. "Okay, let's just work on the posters. Sound good?"

"Hai, sensei~" Rin said happily. Obito and Kakashi both nodded – heaven forbid they express interest in anything – and Minato let out a relieved sigh.

"Alright. I've got pens, and poster board, and glitter. Rin, you're in charge. I'll make some food for everyone." Minato turned to walk back to the kitchen, but paused and slowly turned to look at Kakashi. Slate-grey eyes stared back at him balefully. Logically, Minato knew that Kakashi didn't hate him – the grey-haired boy had admitted, begrudgingly, that Minato was actually his favorite teacher – but in that moment, Minato found it hard to believe that Kakashi liked him. If looks could kill indeed…

Minato looked over his shoulder, back into the living room, and was torn between relief and disgust as Shikaku lead his girlfriend back to his room. Ugh. He really, really didn't want Obito to ask what they were doing… Knowing the Uchiha, it's the first thing he would ask. "You alright there, Mina-chan?"

Minato jumped – stupid, so stupid, to forget about Kushina. It seemed like she was always around when he least expected it, and Minato was more than a little embarrassed at how often she caught him off guard. "Yeah, just getting some snacks for the kids." Minato prayed she couldn't hear the tremble in his voice. Even Minato – shy Minato, who blushed whenever Jiraiya even mentioned his "romance" books – noticed how… well, how pretty Kushina was. Her red hair and violet eyes and frankly terrifying temper were all rather endearing. Oh god, Minato thought. I need help. Psychiatric help. This is the girl who almost broke Choza's nose when he tried to eat her instant ramen last week. "Right," Minato mumbled, and, after gathering an armful of snacks – and some apples, his kids have to eat right! – staggered back into the living room.

Unfortunately, Kushina followed. She perched on the couch beside Obito, propping her feet up on the coffee table (and on Inoichi's magazine's – that would cause an argument, and it was already giving Minato a headache). This was going to be a very, very long day.

Saturday was, in a word, odd. Minato was eating dinner with Inoichi; this had, unfortunately, become a common occurrence. "So," Kushina said, walking into the kitchen with Kurama in her arms, "I was in the shower with Kurama, and I realized: I should start dating again!"

"Oh god." Inoichi rolled his eyes. "Here we go again…"

Minato raised an eyebrow at Inoichi. "She showers with her cat?" he murmured.

"That's not even the weird part," Inoichi sighed softly. Raising his voice, he said, "Shina, the last time you dated someone, it was a complete disaster! Don't you remember what happened last Christmas?"

Kushina huffed. "Inoichi, the last guy I dated was you!"

That was still surprising. Minato hadn't known at first – although in hindsight, he should have guessed really, Kushina was an attractive, if insane, single woman living with three men, of course she had dated at least one of them. But Inoichi, really? It still didn't make much sense. Why would she date Inoichi when there was another, better blond in the same apartment? – Minato knew, logically, that he hadn't lived with them while Kushina and Inoichi were dating, and that hair color probably wasn't a factor in their relationship, but still. Inoichi? Why?

Sighing, Minato interrupted Inoichi's angry yelling – something about him being the best damn thing to happen to Kushina, would she rather have dated Shikaku? – and addressed Kushina. "It's great that you want to date again, Kushina, but why are you telling us this?"

"Oh. Right. Well, Mikoto-chan got me invited to this party thing tonight, and I need someone to watch Kurama while I'm gone!"

"Hell no!" Inoichi slammed his palms against the table, glaring up at Kushina. "I am not spending one more second with that thing than I need to! I am out! Mina, record Icha Icha for me!" Inochi stood and stormed out of the apartment – leaving his dishes for Minato to do. Again.

"Mina-chan, you'll watch Kurama, won't you?"

Not for the first time, Minato cursed his inability to say no to Kushina. "Of course I will," he promised, staring balefully at the cat. Kurama glared back. There was something weird about that cat. Would it be sacrilegious to ask a priest to perform an exorcism on a cat? Unfortunately, Minato thought it would be.

Note: I am so sorry it has been like three months since I updated this, and this chapter is not as long or as great as I wanted it to be. I probably won't be updating this story regularly anymore; I'm starting classes soon, and I've been dealing with some health & family issues, but I will post updates as often as I can, even if they are sporadic! Anyways, drop a review if you feel like it, and thank you for reading! Let me know what you want to see in the next chapter and I will try my best to write it!