Chapter Four:

When the SUN is just another STAR of the universe

Francis watched Lovino's disinterested face. For the past days, the Italian always popped the question, "Hey Francis, did we really love each other then?"

The Frenchman was just thankful that his boyfriend was spending time with him.

As much as he likes to think like this, it was not possible. The question that is consistently in his mind was the last one he heard from Lovino. Francis feels that the ghost of his boyfriend was hanging around him. He feels that if he doesn't give a satisfactory reply, he would be chaining Lovino to this Earth forever.

As what he heard, Lovino Vargas died three months ago in a car accident while Feliciano Vargas is still in coma.

Since the accident, Francis has not shown himself to the Vargas family. The last time he took a glimpse of Lovino was before the casket was lowered to the ground. A weight was lifted off the blue-eyed French as he saw a peaceful visage of the Italian.

After the funeral, Francis drowned himself with booze. It was impossible to do anything for the following days. He alternated between screaming and drinking. His friends, Gilbert and Antonio, tried to be there for him. If they weren't there, he wasn't sure what he would have done.

It took a month for Francis before he could fully accept that Lovino was no longer there.

"Wanker, just let him go already. He is no longer here."

At some point, Francis and Arthur met up. The two of them grew up on the same neighborhood from elementary to middle school. Then the two went again to the same college. Despite the blank years during high school, the two of them were sort-of good friends. They never tried to say otherwise what they meant; it was probably one of Francis' most honest relationships.

Right now, it took everything for Francis to even walk through the streets of Rome. In the distance, he could hear the strong pounding of the lower keys of the piano which is accompanied by the light, agile presses if the higher notes. For Francis, the song depicted a maelstrom; an inner war that is trying to express itself through music.

'I'm not a musician beard bastard but I know that a melody will always transcend words.'

Francis walked closer to the source of the music and it was an open-air café. There were two people who were by the piano and for a short moment, he listened to the conversation.

"Hey, that was amazing! Will you play that in your recital?"

"Maybe… I'm not yet sure. I still need more practice. I missed some notes near the end and -"

"Stop with that sorry assed self-depreciation. Come on, whatever you chose will be on me!"

Francis just smiled at the friendly banter between the two strangers. On the surface, they looked like an ill-fitted pair of friends. Deep down, though, they knew one another well enough; supported each other. That was Francis saw it anyway. When the duo was no longer in sight, the Frenchman walked away from place. He knew how to get to the cemetery but he was purposely delaying his arrival there. It would have taken him less than 10 minutes if he takes a taxi.

The sun was setting across the horizon when the Frenchman finally reached the grave of Lovino Vargas. It was well-maintained and the smell of chrysanthemum filled his senses.

Forever loved and missed.

The short epitaph made the Francis' heart ache. The young man bit his lip in an attempt to stop himself from crying. Despite the months that have passed since Lovino's death, he could not yet bring himself to accept the fact that his l'amour was gone.

However, he needed to move on with his life. He could wallow forever in his grief.

It might sound cruel but even if he stops, the world will still move.

Later that evening, Francis Bonnefoy dropped by the Vargas house. He was relieved that the patriarch of the family was out for business and it was Feliciano who greeted him. He wasn't planning to stay long; he just needed to give something, or rather return something, to the family.

"Hi Francis..."

"Hello Feliciano, how are you doing?"

"I'm... fine."

"Are you and Arthur still dating?"

"N-No. We broke up after the funeral. He said that he was going to the US and work there."

"I see." Francis curtly nodded. He was surprised that his friend, Arthur, was dating the younger brother of his lover. 'Italians really had a certain appeal,' He quietly mused. "I'm here to return this." Francis gave an envelope to Feliciano.

"Return?"

"Yes, Lovino gave this to me some time ago," A nostalgic smile appeared on Francis' face. "I don't want to hold on it any longer that's why I'm returning it here."

Francis could see the confusion of Feliciano. It was a natural response. Nobody would return a letter after keeping it for so long.

"You, You should just keep this to yourself. We- We are moving to the Northern part of Italy by next month and Grandpa plans to sell this house along with Fratello's belongings... so, keep it Francis."

The news came as a surprise. He didn't expect that the family was moving away. He couldn't give a reply, so he just smiled and shortly said his goodbye.

"Take care of yourself Francis."

"Same to you too."

When the Frenchman was waiting at the airport to board for his flight, he reopened again the letter. He only read it once because he found the handwriting unsightly. It was messy and there were blotches of ink everywhere. It was understandable since this was an old assignment of Lovino; his younger partner needed to send a letter to someone with the contents written using a fountain pen.

Thank God that the teacher won't read this but I need you to write me a reply bastard. This is some assignment shit that I have to do. So we are required to write a letter and the receiver of the letter must reply.

Francis smiled. Lovino always had the habit to underline words that he wanted to emphasize.

What the fuck am I supposed to write?

I guess I'd like to say thank you for all. Before I continue, don't talk to about what I have written here or else I will kick you on the balls. Seriously. Also, I am not writing to Feliciano because the idiot will give maybe a 20-page reply and I don't have time to read something that long.

Right, so yeah, thank you.

I don't hate that you are with me.

That's all.

Lov-,

Lovino Vargas

Before the end of the letter, there was a lov which was heavily blotted at the end.

'Maybe he was about to write, love?' Francis quietly laughed. In a way, maybe Lovino did love him. For sure, he was in love with the other man. This is an unshakable truth.

Finally, there was an announcement that it was time for boarding. Back then, Francis replied with an I love you and he received a punch because the replies were read in front of the class. Francis was thinking that Lovino wouldn't have read it but the Italian did. Francis was unbelievably very happy and the pain didn't matter at all.

When his flight left the airport, that letter was left behind on one of the terminal's benches. Lovino was definitely his SUN. However, eventually, he too would just be another star in the universe.

END

A/N: Thank you so much for reading this. This was originally an old draft written during times of boredom; I tweaked it a bit and this is it.