Thank you for all the reviews, as promised, a bit more character play in this one and I hope to keep building on this.
I also wanted to introduce some of the characters we know will be joining the cast for season 4, so I'd love some feedback on that!
Keep the reviews coming, they fuel the creative brain!
She could feel the sweat pooling at the base of her back, she couldn't remember sweating this much, well, practically ever. She wiped a damp piece of hair back from her eyes as she sat in Dr. Lipsteins waiting room patiently.
She'd finally reached the pinnacle of her appointments; it was 'make or break' time. She was either going to discuss Melanie's death (which she was positive that the good doctor already knew about somehow) or she may not be cleared to return to work for another week-possibly longer.
The thought made her want to throw up—or pass out—or a combination of both.
She noticed that she'd be involuntarily tapping her foot for the past 3 minutes, and slowed her pace until she could force herself to stop. But every time she saw Melanie's face… heard that scream before the gun shot, she felt dizzy.
A big part of Andy's worry was that she wasn't fit to do her job anymore. Maybe this feeling meant she wasn't a good cop, couldn't handle the loss. She was concerned; not just about confessing her feelings about the incident with a complete stranger, but also about what that stranger may decide to do with her. The Doc held the future of her career in her hands, what if she decided Andy had made a terrible mistake? Or worse, couldn't recover?
"Andy McNally?" Dr. Lipstein's secretary stepped out of the office and glanced down the hall towards her, "Dr. Lipstein will see you now." She smiled, almost reassuring.
Andy stood up too fast and knocked her knee against the waiting room table before embarrassingly making her way to the office door.
"So Andy, nice to see you again," Dr. Lipstein glanced up slightly from her paperwork, "How are you feeling after the events we discussed?"
Andy gulped, "I'm feeling okay. I mean, I'm slightly frustrated that my return to work order has been delayed, pending your review, but I understand its protocol." She rubbed her sore knee before quickly meeting Lipsteins eyes.
"Yes, well, I can't help feeling that regardless of everything you have shared, that there is still an underlying issue as to why you can't sleep at night Andy."
Lipstein makes a small note on her pad and rests her pen on her chin, "You mentioned last time you hear screaming sometimes, before you wake up. That it feels real to you in the moment."
Andy can feel the sweat pooling again, she feels dizzy when she thinks of Melanie's face. The grime on her skin, mixed with the blood seeping from the obvious cuts on her forehead.
This was it, this is her moment. There would be no going back.
"Okay, I'll talk." Andy sighed and prepared to recap her last night under cover…
She'd been getting ready all afternoon, Nick was on his way to pick her up in 10 minutes to attend Carlos Vetto's warehouse party.
They'd been tailing Carlos, getting close to the prostitute ring leader for quite a while, and Carlos was taking an interest in Andy. This was both a win for the case and terrifying for Andy personally. There was a lot riding on her relationship with Carlos and his ability to to provide her with information regarding the abuse of his girls to her without him guessing her betrayal.
Luckily, she'd grown friendly with one of Carlos' girls, Melanie Wilks. Melanie had been working for Carlos for just under a year, and was the favorite of Carlos's partner, Leto Mendez. She'd taken to Andy right away, assuring her that working for the two men wasn't that bad and that the perks of the relationship far out weighted the alternative: running.
Andy had made the mistake of letting down her guard with Melanie. She had started to trust her.
That's when things went bad.
Andy began to have personal feelings about Melanie. Specifically regarding her safety.
She got protective and started to advise Melanie that she should get out of the life. Melanie seemed to agree and began forming a plan to leave Letos, a plan that only Andy knew about. Andy was going to help her escape.
But what Andy didn't see coming was Melanie's guilt-and her unrelenting devotion to Leto. She finally caved under pressure and spilled her plan to Leto, even going as far as to mention that Andy had offered to help her leave. His response was to beat her; brutally and mercilessly.
So there Andy was, the night of Carlos's warehouse party, walking into a trap set by someone she thought she was helping escape, only, she hadn't helped Melanie at all; or herself for that matter.
Andy entered the warehouse to find that it was deserted except for a small group of men crowded around something in the center of the room. Nick followed close behind her, and she could register the shock on his face when they both realized there wasn't any party happening here tonight.
At least, not the kind of party they were hopeing to walk into.
"Rachel," Carlos smiled, turning away from the group of men and sauntering towards Andy, "So nice of you and your partner—" she listened to him linger on the word, "to join us."
"He knows," she thought to herself, "Shit."
She smiled, trying to keep her front going for as long as possible, "I was expecting more of a party Carlos, I didn't realize you wanted to keep it so intimate," she chuckled.
"Well, there are matters to discuss that are not suitable with a crowd of people present." He smiled, "But then again, you must know, since you and Melanie have been discussing such issues privately together for some time."
Andy could feel his aggression building, and she could feel Nick tense behind her, clearly he didn't understand what was happening and she suddenly felt incredibly foolish for not briefing him, filling him in on her plan with Melanie.
She'd only wanted to help.
"C'mon Carlos, are you kidding me?" she played with fire, "I have no idea what you're talking about. But Melanie must be pulling the wool over your eyes big time." She winked playfully. She felt Nick move closer behind her and she struggled to keep her breathing in check.
"Leto, why don't we ask Melanie what her and 'Rachel' discussed?" Carlos called out to the group of men behind him and parted slowly to reveal Leto standing with his hand tangled in someone's hair.
He reached down and brushed a few strands out of her eyes. Melanie.
She'd let out a low whimper and her eyes showed genuine surprise when she'd spotted Andy and Nick standing a mere 15 feet from her. She gave Andy a look of pleading, she was afraid and Andy could feel her fear rolling through the room in waves.
Maybe Melanie was right-running was a bad idea.
Leto advanced, dragging her forward on the concrete and shouted, "You tell my girl to run from me?!" His eyes were black with fury and he glared at her venom dripping from his words.
"There must be a misunderstanding here Carlos," Nick addressed him, stepping out in front of Andy, "Rachel didn't mean any harm and clearly, Melanie wanted to leave or she wouldn't have mentioned anything to her in the first place."
Andy groaned internally, Nick had pointed out a flaw in Melanie that may have just cost them both their lives.
"Guys, hey—let's hold up a second here," Andy interjected, "Melanie clearly knows this talk between us wasn't a good idea, she's shown she wants to stay with Leto. Clearly-clearly he is the most important thing to her, she's showing that now." Andy fumbled, trying to guide Leto into letting Melanie go. She looked like she'd seen better days, and unless she was crying blood Andy was certain she needed immediate medical attention.
"No." Leto glared at her menacingly, "No bitch runs from me and gets to live to tell her stupid whore friends about it."
Carlos crossed his arms and the men surrounded Melanie and dragged her to her knees. She cried, her tears and blood, it was all Andy could see.
"Wait-"Andy interjected, "Stop!" She started to step forward but Nick held her back.
Carlos pulled a gun from his jacket and pointed it directly at Andy and Nick, "You stay where you are." His eyes had been clear in his intentions.
"She's just a girl!" Andy shouted, "Please—just, just wait. Carlos, let's talk this over—"she started but was interrupted by the piercing scream coming from Melanie… and then a single shot.
"And that's when S.W.A.T and the UC team stormed the building." Andy finished, looking up at Dr. Lipstein slowly, "I was escorted from the building… I didn't even see her body. Nick came to tell me that he'd shot her... they'd shot her once in the head. There was no way to save her. She was killed instantly." Andy gulped back tears.
"Andy, you realize that Melanie did what many victims in her circumstances do, correct? She returned to her abuser out of fear and ended up the by-product of his cruelty for a second time." Dr. Lipstein rested her pad on her lap and leaned forward in her chair, "You helping her, however irrational in your mind now, was probably the only kindness that girl had seen in a year."
Andy wiped her eyes as stray tears escaped, "But she's dead. She died! Because of me," she took her head in her hands and the tears fell more freely, "I let down my partner; I kept Nick in the dark. The first rule of policing—watch your partner's back and what do I do? I keep him out of the loop."
Dr. Lipstien handed her a tissue and she accepted it gratefully, "I cost someone their life because I thought I was doing the right thing." She looked up and met Dr. Lipsteins eyes; finally, "Just like when Sam listened to me instead of Jerry…" she paused, remembering their horrible confrontation and break up behind The Black Penny a year ago.
"Andy, you can't take the blame for things that happen to other people. You didn't pull the trigger. You tried to rescue a girl from a life she thought she could never escape. She chose to return to her abuser." Dr. Lipstein looked Andy up and down a final time, "You have a brave heart. A full heart; that's part of what makes you a wonderful police officer," she finished.
Andy smiled across the room at Lipstein and wiped her eyes for the last time.
"I've just been feeling so anxious about it; especially with the trial coming up and all. A large part of their case is based upon what I can remember about my meetings with Melanie and the audio I recorded during our sessions alone together. It's a lot of weight for me to carry, I feel responsible."
"Andy," Lipstein pursued, "You are not able to control someone's death. You followed protocol and even if S.W.A.T had come in minutes before, there is no guarantee he wouldn't have shot her immediately upon their arrival. You were 15 feet from where her body was found. You couldn't have branched the distance without having yourself or Officer Collins wounded or killed."
Andy looked across the room to the plaques on her wall, "You sure know a lot of the logistics," she finished quietly.
"I've reviewed the case, yes. That's part of what I do here Andy." Lipstein stated, using her first name for the first time in their several sessions, "You need to accept Melanie's death and understand that it had nothing to do with what you did or did not do."
She stated matter of factly, "If you do not, her killers may walk free based on the fact that you are not fit to testify or participate in the giving of evidence in Melanie's case."
The words stung Andy in a way she hadn't thought of over the past month.
"I—I understand." Andy replied, glancing Dr. Lipstein in the eyes, "I don't want them to get away—away with what they did to her." Andy closed her eyes and took a deep breath, "I can do this."
"Good," Lipstein replied, picking up her pad again and making a few quick notes, "Because you are cleared to return to work."
Andy pushed harder on the pavement and rounded the corner with the sort of momentum you see in Adidas commercials. Her ipod pounded in her ears and she could feel her body ache with the familiar feeling of stiff muscles combined with exertion. She needed to make sure she stretched after this run, she'd been cheating and skipping her cool down sessions.
She jogged past the park near the precinct and debated taking another route past the lighthouse where she used to find her Dad on occasion, but decided against it. She pumped harder and sped up—maybe she could catch Sam before he finished shift. If she picked up the pace she could make the precinct in 25 minutes. Her heart raced at the thought.
Her thoughts filled with the past 4 weeks, how good it felt to have Sam back in her life.
They'd been doing so well, and his ambition on his latest cases had really helped inspire her to open up to Dr. Lipstein this morning, his hard work really put all of this Melanie stuff in perspective for her.
She'd been prepping out of neccessity, but now she couldn't wait to testify against Melanie's murders in court. Her notes were impeccable and she was more than ready. She hoped they would get life without parole. Sam had been prepping her at home the last week, asking her the tough questions based on her notes and going over her testimony with her on a daily basis, looking for holes. She felt strong because of him. They were a great team.
She finished her run a block from Division 15 and slowed to a walk for her cool down. It took her another 10 minutes before she hit the front doors of the precinct. As she entered the lobby, she noticed Chris working the front desk.
"Diaz, what did you do to deserve desk duty?" She joked, rounding the corner and slipping behind the desk with him.
"I've been working the desk since I put in for transfer," he smiled at her, but she could sense he wasn't as thrilled at the idea as he seemed originally 8 months ago.
"Yeah? How's that going anyhow?" she inquired casually, "Seems to be taking an awfully long time to go through. You'd think a nice boy like you they'd speed up the process."
Chris laughed, "Yeah, you'd think," he glanced around, making sure they were alone, "I don't know Andy… I've been debating lately whether all of this is worth it," he sighed, "I mean, I see Christian every weekend, and Denise has barely been around to see me. She seems more relieved that she's not having to handle him alone than excited for us to be together, to be a family."
Andy could see the sadness in his eyes. This wasn't how Chris had imagined his family beginning.
"Well, maybe you need to re-evaluate what you want out of life. You're a good cop Chris, a better cop than working desk duty all day, every day. Maybe it's more important to show Christian how to be a good man who lives life to the fullest—than to be the guy who stayed for the wrong reasons." She finished thoughtfully.
Chris paused, "Maybe you're right." He glanced down at his paperwork before finishing, "Thanks Andy."
"No problem Diaz." She laughed, "You see Swarek around these parts?"
"Uh, yeah," he replied, barely looking up from his computer screen, "He's working some robbery case with Marlo right now."
"Marlo?" Andy inquired, curiously, "New rookie or new officer?"
"New officer, she's 8 years in. Apparently, she worked rookie with Swarek but swapped divisions to work an international case load for a couple years." He looked up at her and paused, "You'll see when you meet her. She's different."
"Huh, thanks, I'll catch you later." Andy gave a gentle wave and weaved through the door to the hallway that led to the parade room and the locker room.
As she rounded the corner she caught movement out of the corner of her eye and stopped to observe Sam coming out of interrogation room two with a short brunette.
She was pretty, with a dark tan and a generous smile—well; she was giving Sam a generous smile. Andy wasn't sure whether to feel uneasy about it or not. She waited, watching from behind her pillar as Sam put an arm around the brunette's shoulders and guided her over to the detectives' offices. She watched through the glass as they shared a laugh over something she couldn't hear and saw the brunette sit opposite him and observe a report or some other case file on the screen. Andy couldn't help but notice how the brunette leaned close over Sam's shoulder and smiled at every comment he made.
"You going to stand there staring all day or approach him McNally?"
Andy jumped at Nick's voice and nearly collapsed in his arms after catching her breath.
"Jesus Nick!" she yelped, "You scared me! You shouldn't sneak up on someone like that."
"You mean, like you're sneaking around watching Sam right now?" He grinned from ear to ear, "In case you're wondering, that nice lady goes by Marlo—Marlo Cruz."
"So I hear." Andy glanced over at Sam again, "Have you patrolled with her yet? I see she's in uniform so she's clearly not his partner."
Nick sighed and looked Andy directly in the eye, "She's definitely not his partner, in any sense of the word," he smiled, "And yes, I've patrolled with her. Only once, but she seems okay. She can definitely be a bit on the bossy side."
"Huh," Andy continued, "Well at least now I'm cleared to return to work."
"You got cleared?!" Nick nearly shouted in Andy's ear, "Finally! Thank god Andy!"
She laughed and playfully slapped him, "I'm not as speedy as you, but hey, slow and steady wins the race-or so I've heard."
"McNally?" She turned at Sam's voice and his eyes were searching hers, "You got cleared for work?"
"Geez, Sam! Everyone is sneaking up on me today! And yes—yes, I got the word today. Just a few hours ago actually," She smiled up at him, "I was coming by to see if you were off shift soon, perhaps a small celebration is in order?"
"That's great!" Sam glanced down at his feet, "But I've got to work this case late with Officer Cruz, and I don't think I can do tonight," he glanced up into her eyes, "Another night?"
Andy tried not to appear too crushed, "Yeah, of course," she smiled weakly, "Another night is perfect."
"Okay," Sam smiled back, "Well, I've got to go crush this case, I'll call you later tonight?"
"Yes—I'll talk to you later." Andy finished, leaning forward and planting a kiss directly on his lips.
He kissed back and it felt divine. She felt a wave of relief wash over her.
Sam could never fall for some Officer he knew back in his rookie days, after all, he had been through so much with Andy that they'd earned this shot at happiness; she was certain of it.
As she pulled away from him softly she caught the eye of the brunette, Marlo, watching them from the detectives' office. The look on her face was not one of curiosity or indifference. It was a look of pure irritation and dislike.
Sam brushed a stray hair from her eyes, "I'll catch you later, promise," he winked at her, "Collins" he tipped his head—"See you guys later." He waved and walked off towards his office.
Nick gave a gentle wave and smiled goodbye.
As Sam jogged up the steps to his office, Nick leaned forward and whispered in Andy's ear, "I take that back—I think you just made an enemy McNally."
"Holy moly," she sighed quietly.
Things at 15th Division had just gotten interesting.