"Dad, can you buy me a new toy?"

"Kid, you have enough toys already. You're becoming a hoarder."

Link pulled on Ganondorf's hand, tugging him towards a home electronics store.

"I want one of those!" he yelled, pointing.

"A leaf blower isn't a toy. What would you even do with it?"

"Where are we going?"

"I'm going to the grocery store. You're not going anywhere."

"Why can't I come too?"

"After last time, I think they've put up a wanted poster with your picture on it."

Ganondorf walked with Link down the pedestrian shopping arcade that ran through the middle of town. People who recognized him waved, and he nodded back to them. Link was completely oblivious.

They came to a stop in front of a flower shop with a colorful sidewalk display. A pair of piranha plants were twined on a trellis next to the door, lazily snapping at each other. Link started to poke one of them, but Ganondorf frowned at him, and he smiled sheepishly.

"GANON! GOOD TO SEE YOU!" Bowser shouted, throwing the door open. He made a wide gesture, inviting them in. A bed of white Nipper Plants chirped as they entered.

"Hold on, give me just one second." Bowser bent over the store counter and made a few adjustments to the bouquet of fire flowers in front of him. Ganondorf noted that his apron was singed black in a few places.

"What are you reading?" Link asked. Junior was sitting by the door next to a pen of seedling Pokey cacti with a glossy book spread out in front of him.

"It's a guide for Minecraft. I'm studying how to build castles with Dad."

"Cool. Let me see!" Link dropped Ganondorf's hand and squatted next to Junior, who scooted over to make room.

Ganondorf watched them for a few moments and then turned his attention to Bowser. "I hate to do this, but can you watch Link for half an hour? I need to drop by the grocery store."

"Sure thing! Did Ghirahim raid your fridge after work last night?"

"No. He insisted on eating his own disgusting cup noodles, but he broke the lock on the bathroom door."

"How'd he manage that?"

"Don't ask me; I don't know how that idiot manages anything."

Ganondorf looked down at Link. "I'm only going to leave you here for a short time. Please don't kill anything in the store until I come back."

"Okay," Link said, obviously not paying attention. He was already engrossed in Junior's book.

Five minutes later Ganondorf was in the grocery store, eyeing clusters of tomatoes. He had tried to grow tomato plants in his small yard, but Link had picked them all while they were still green. When Ganondorf caught him, the boy had been crushing them between his hands and mashing the paste into his hair, saying that he wanted to dye his hair red like his Dad's. Ganondorf had hugged him and tickled him until he shrieked with laughter. That night he fried the remaining tomatoes, and Link gobbled them like candy.

Someone tapped him on the shoulder.

"Ganondorf?"

He turned to see his college friend Marth, who was standing beside his boyfriend, Roy.

"Hey buddy!" Roy said, grinning. "We heard you were back in town. Did you really bring a kid home with you?"

"Honestly Roy, that is absolutely tactless," Marth chastised him.

"No, it's fine," Ganondorf sighed. "I moved back about a month ago, and I do have a kid. He's a walking disaster. I left him at Bowser's while I'm in the store."

"Speaking of which," Roy jumped in, "have you confessed your love yet?"

"Roy!" Marth interjected.

"Come on, Marth, you said it yourself that this guy had to leave the country to get his feelings straight."

Marth blushed as red as Roy's hair. "I said no such thing."

"Right," Ganondorf interrupted them. "I appreciate your searing insight into my personal life. You two are the worst type of couple."

"Of course we are," Roy said. "You should give it a try sometime."

"We'll call you, okay?" Marth said, steering Roy away.

Ganondorf pretended to examine the tomatoes until they were out of sight. What Roy had said to him wasn't wrong, but he hated admitting it to anyone, especially himself.