"Well, I don't know how to make this seem any easier than it is…" I laced my fingers together behind my back as I stood up from my bed. It was only eventually that everybody in this household would learn about Dad's secret affairs with that Rainbow Bright Boy. "Dad's cheating on Mom."

"What? How do you know that?" Sebastian looked at me with a surprised expression. His mouth was hung open a bit and his blue eyes widened. Well, where does he think his promiscuous ways come from? Not the bumpkin matrilineal side, that's all I can say.

"I saw Dad…. I saw him…." I bit my lip.

"You saw him doing what?!" He insisted.

"Making out with Kafei…." There! It was finally out! Dad's dirty little secret would now spread surely. It's just going to hurt to see the consequences for Dad's actions. Manic Mom was going to shed her faux happiness for sure and become some murderess. The city police will find us all slaughtered tiny bits of flesh. It would all be Dad's, Hyrule's hero, fault that Mom killed us all. Only the police would never know the truth. Actually, that wouldn't be too bad. I mean, it would certainly be less embarrassing, you know. Instead of some officer going, "Wow. They all died because their father neglected them and had a sensual relationship with some teenage emo." To another officer or to the city folk. I don't want to be known as the hero's daughter who died because of her mother's rage of her father's adultery.

No freaking way.

"Oh God….." Sebastian covered his face with one of his large peachy hands with a sigh. "That kid was our dad's lover? That's so disgusting! Did he ever think of Mom? Life is definitely going to change in this house, Lilith…."

"No, really?" I spat sarcastically. "But what are we supposed to do? Do we tell Mom or do we have Dad confess guilty?"

"I've got an idea. We'll have him confess at dinner tonight." Sebastian smirked maliciously.

Everyone sat down at the table together for chicken that had a delicious aroma that engulfed the room. Mom poured fresh milk into each of our glasses with a bright cheery smile. I cringed as she poured milk into my glass, knowing all too well that the smile of hers was going to curl downwards soon.

We all silently dug into the chicken, ripping away at the good meat. Silverware clinked against each other as we stole our share and slapped it onto our own plates to satisfy our hunger.

"You know what's popular in the city now?" Sebastian broke the silence as he heavily chewed on a piece of chicken.

"What?" Both my parents asked as they nibbled at their share.

"Homosexuality."

"What?!" Mom's fork clattered down onto the decorative plate that she was eating off of. "Why are you bringing this up at the dinner table?" Mom was and had always been an old-fashioned woman who was against everything new these days. It would be no surprise to find her having homophobia. Too bad she's been living and sleeping with one.

"Because a lot of people are doing it. I thought you'd like to know…" Sebastian defended himself. His eyes narrowed slightly at Dad when he said, "Dad, do you know what the most popular food is these days?"

Dad looked up at him with a smile, oblivious to Sebastian's glare, "What? Our milk?"

"Nope. Spicy meatballs…."

Oh my God! I started choking on my sliver of chicken meat in my mouth. That was too funny! Alternatively, it was for me, anyways. Meatballs. Ha. How dirty that word could get with people.

Dad looked at Sebastian as if he had said the wrong thing at the wrong time. Maybe he just thought his only son was crazy. "Really…"

"Yeah, it's true. People just like preferring meatballs to spaghetti. Therefore, in the end, the city folk buy the meatballs for subs and not for eating anything Italian. Weird, huh?" Sebastian grinned evilly.

"How interesting…" Dad fidgeted in his chair with a cough.

"Something wrong, Dad?" I inquired. Something you'd like to share with us, you bastard.

"I'm fine as can be. I'm peachy keen!" Dad laughed nervously.

"Dad, guess what the guys in the city were talking about today?" Sebastian questioned him again.

"Meatballs?"

"Nah. That was what I observed. Today a lot of men were talking about sodomy…"

Mom and Dad simultaneously spit up their milk. My mother's eyes widened, staring straight at Sebastian. Dad frowned and began fidgeting in his chair again. He looked so guilty! How could Mom not notice this? Yeah, she was a bit dense in the head, but come on now! His face read GUILTY!

"I can't stand it anymore!" I stood up at the table and slammed my palms on the wooden surface. "Dad's cheating on you, Mom, with a boy!" I yelled angrily.