The Chance of Love

Chapter 4

Bilbo was fuming inside. This couldn't be happening. On the other hand he shouldn't be surprised. Thorin always knew how to be difficult. But this time it wasn't about him, it was about Bilbo.

"Can you just think about this for a minute?!"

"I did-"

"For a whole ten seconds," Bilbo yelled at him. "This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. Are you really going to take it away from me? Could you be any more selfish than this?"

"I'm not stopping you!" Thorin said defensively. "I never said you can't go. If you want to go, then be my guest, enjoy it."

"So I can take Theo with me?" Bilbo asked, a little confused since this fight was all about Thorin not allowing him to take Theo away.

"Out of the question," Thorin cut back sharply.

"Then why did you say I can go?"

"It's your life, you can do whatever you want, but you are not taking Theodore away from here."

Bilbo didn't miss how Thorin used 'here' as from this place, instead of 'me', but decided to ignore it. He knew that Thorin cared about Theo as much as he did, he just didn't show it. "It's not like you'll miss him, you hardly see him." Bilbo knew he shouldn't have said that, but what was done was done. "It's a five hour drive."

"Seven by bus," Thorin corrected and offered him one of those fake smiles. "And if it's only seven hour drive then I'm sure you won't have any problems coming to visit - that is, if you decide to go. I'm sure Theodore will miss you, after all, you mean the world to him."

Bilbo swallowed hard. When Thorin didn't want him to do something he always played that card. It was low and dirty, but it always made Bilbo feel guilty enough to not do the thing he planned to do. "I would bring him back once a month, even every two weeks if that's what you would want. You would still get to see him and talk to him. We could both be happy with the arrangement. And you spend most of the week on the campus, you wouldn't get to see him anyway."

"Actually, I'm moving back home. It's not that far and I can drive to my classes every morning."

"So you're moving back home because you need someone to clean and cook for you," Bilbo summarized and Thorin shot him a look. There was a moment of silence before Bilbo spoke again. "Can I at least ask you to think about it. I really want to go. I'm sick of working at the grocery store."

"I will think about it," promised Thorin, "but don't expect a different answer. Theodore stays here. The way I see it you have three options. Number one: you can go, but Theodore stays and number two: you can both stay here."

"And number three?" asked Bilbo.

"You can always find another job if you don't like working at the grocery store."

That wasn't something Bilbo expected to hear, but he wasn't shocked. This wasn't the Thorin he once knew. The Thorin he once knew would be excited for him, and would accept the offer to come with him. After all, the apartments were designed for small families and the business classes Thorin was taking were almost the same in the Iron Hills as they were here.

Bilbo didn't want to sound so broken but he just couldn't help himself. "You know, I thought we were in this together. Not like together, together, but more like partners. I thought we were going to help each other out. That we were going to share the responsibility and the consequences. I guess I was wrong." He picked up Theo's bag and headed toward the door. "Thank you for watching him while I was at work."

Bilbo left Thorin's room without looking back or saying anything else. He went to pick up Theo, who was playing with Fíli in the playroom, before they headed home.

"Hey," Fíli smiled. "I think congratulations are in order. Everyone heard," Fíli told him happily. "You must be so excited about getting accepted to college!"

Bilbo sighed and sat down next to his son on the floor who continued to play with his toys. He brushed a strand of hair from his son's face before answering. "I guess I might have spoken about it too quickly."

"What? You didn't get in? I heard you were practically in and that all you had to do was send your application."

"I did get in," Bilbo tried to smile, "but things changed. I will not be going."

"What?! Why not? This is the perfect opportunity."

"True," agreed Bilbo. "But I don't want to leave Theo behind. He's used to living with me, and he's only two, I can't just leave him."

Fíli immediately understood what this was all about. "If you want I can talk to Thorin-"

"No, it's fine," Bilbo interrupted quickly. "We already spoke and decided it would be for the best if I don't go."

"That's bullshit!" Fíli exclaimed and Bilbo shot him a look. He didn't like it when people cursed around Theo, especially now that he enjoyed repeating things. "What I wanted to say is that we both know that it didn't happen like that. Did Thorin threaten you-"

"No, no," Bilbo interrupted again. "Nothing like that. We discussed everything and then made the decision together."

"You know I don't believe you, don't you?"

"I know," Bilbo confirmed with a sigh. "But can we just leave it at that? I don't want anyone to blame Thorin."

"One day Theo will be old enough to understand what happened and he's going to be angry at Thorin anyway. I don't know why you're trying to protect my brother so much. He's a jerk."

Bilbo sent him another look and Fíli just shrugged. "He does what he thinks is the best for Theo. I admit that I was being selfish. What was I thinking? Taking a two-year-old with me to college? Who does that?"

"You weren't being selfish," Fíli told him. "You just want to do the things everyone else does, and going to college is one of them."

Bilbo nodded. "Thank you for playing with him."

"It was a pleasure," Fíli smiled. "After all, he's my favorite nephew."

"He's your only nephew," Bilbo reminded him and Fíli offered him a smile.

After putting the toys away and saying goodbye they finally left. Theo was tired and insisted on Bilbo carrying him. They weren't that far from the house when they met Dwalin and Ori, holding hands and looking completely in love with each other.

"Bilbo!" Ori greeted, all excited, but Bilbo shushed him. Theo was already half asleep in his arms. "Where are you going? We are just headed over to Thorin's, but decided to take a walk since it's warm enough. We haven't talked in ages! How have you been? And look at how cute Theo is! Isn't he beautiful?" Ori asked and tugged at Dwalin's hand like a child, but Dwalin didn't even move.

"I'm fine," answered Bilbo, not quite knowing where to start. "We were just there, now we're heading home because someone is tired," he explained and looked fondly at the sleeping boy in his arms.

"Well, next time call me when you visit Thorin. I want to spend some time with Theo. I never get to see him. And we have to talk, we haven't done that in a while."

"I wasn't visiting, I was picking Theo up after work. But I will call you the next time I leave him there, I promise."

"Oh, I completely forgot!" Ori exclaimed. "Congratulations! We all heard you got accepted to college." Bilbo wanted to slap himself. How was it possible that everyone found out about it? Yes, it had been a few weeks since the interview, but he'd only got the acceptance letter two days ago. "You must be so excited," continued Ori. "Which makes me wonder what were you doing at work? Shouldn't you be packing? I heard from my friends that orientation week starts in a few days. You'll have to tell me everything about it!"

Bilbo thought for a moment about how to explain to Ori that he wouldn't be going without making this thing awkward. "There has been some change of plans," he started eventually.

"You won't be going to orientation week? I heard that was the most fun part."

"Yeah, I heard that too… But I thought about everything and decided not to go."

"To the orientation week?" asked Ori, but the look on Bilbo's face told him that they were talking about something else. "Oh… Are you sure about that, because I always thought you wanted to go?"

"Yeah, I'm sure. I had a few days to think about it and decided it would be best not to go," he offered Ori a comforting smile. "I'm sure Theo wouldn't like it there, anyway. All the parties, the noise and the drinking. It's best if I stay here." During his speech Bilbo could feel Dwalin's eyes on him, and he knew that Ori's boyfriend didn't believe a word of it. He was sure Thorin had already informed him of everything that had happened.

"If you believe that would be the best-"

"I do," Bilbo said quickly. "I know it's the right thing to do. Now if you'll excuse me, we need to keep going; someone is already asleep and I'm sure he would appreciate a comfortable bed. Enjoy your evening."

:::

Bilbo got home as fast as he could and put Theo to bed before he took a quick shower and headed downstairs. His family was watching TV but he didn't feel like joining them, he needed some time alone. He went to the kitchen and opened the fridge. The cakes his mother baked for him a few days back was still there. What was left was only a small piece, but it was enough.

"I guess it runs in the family," his father said as he entered the kitchen and found him eating the cake. "Whenever we're upset we eat." Bungo took a fork from the drawer and joined him. "Did you and Thorin talk?"

"We did," Bilbo answered.

"And?"

Bilbo swallowed another bite. "I should have done it sooner. Before I sent my application."

"He doesn't want you to go?"

Bilbo shook his head. "He doesn't care about me, he just doesn't want me to take Theo. And there is nothing I can do about it. I won't leave Theo here."

Bungo clenched his fists. "That boy needs someone to give him a piece of mind!"

"Calm down, dad. It's not his fault. He has the same rights to Theo as I do, and if he doesn't want him to leave that's perfectly understandable. He never said I can't go, he just doesn't want me to take Theo."

"Still, he's only thinking about himself. He never once thinks of you! He comes to visit every few days and then leaves. Hardly a father figure, don't you think?"

"It's not my place to judge Thorin's decisions, and I'm not going to force him to come. He has a family, a girlfriend, he goes to college, he has friends… He's busy."

"And you too have a family, and on top of that you have a son," reminded him Bungo. "He's not just your responsibility."

"I can't force Thorin to come here. It has to be his decision."

"I thought things would be different," admitted Bungo. "I thought you two would work together, not against each other."

"Things are the way they are," Bilbo sighed. "I'm going to call them tomorrow morning and tell them I won't be coming to the Iron Hills. I just feel so stupid right now. If I'd asked Thorin first then I wouldn't be in this situation in the first place."

They were sitting in silence for a minute before Bungo spoke again. "You could at least go to the orientation week. If I understood correctly it's only three days. Theodore would survive without you for a few days and so will you."

"There's no point in going if I'm not planning on studying there, now, is there?" Bilbo almost snapped at his father.

"Then take it as a trip. You'll see some new places, meet some new people. It should be fun. You can take a few days for yourself, no one will blame you. And Theodore can stay with us, or with Thorin. Either way I think you should go and have some fun," Bungo encouraged.

"I don't know, dad. I can't just leave-"

"Sure you can," Bungo interrupted. "And it will only be for three days, that's not long. It'll be over in the blink of eye."

Bilbo thought about it. He really wanted to go so what was stopping him? Theo could stay with Thorin for a few days and he would get to experience a normal campus life. Suddenly he became so excited about meeting new people and seeing new places and learning new things. And so the decision was made.

:::

Bilbo knew that Theo was on the verge of crying, but he couldn't allow him to start crying right now, because then he would start crying and he would never leave.

"Story?"

"You already had a story," Bilbo reminded him and ran his fingers through Theo's hair. "It's time for you to go to sleep."

"Not sleepy," Theo protested. "Want home."

"You're staying with your daddy for a few days, remember? And you can sleep in this bed made for big boys."

"Want my bed," Theo demanded and Bilbo almost rolled his eyes. Theo was always complaining about sleeping in his own bed because it was for babies. Now that he had his own bed he wanted the old one.

"You are going to have so much fun with daddy and Fíli and Kíli," promised him Bilbo. "Now try to go to sleep."

"Stay here."

"I'm going to stay here until you fall asleep," promised Bilbo and placed a kiss on Theo's head. "Now go to sleep."

Theo didn't go to sleep. He kept his eyes open and held Bilbo's hand not wanting to let him go. Bilbo kept glancing to his watch. If he didn't leave soon he'd miss his bus. He had only one option left. He climbed into bed with Theo, knowing that the boy would fall asleep in no time. And that was exactly what happened. Ten minutes later Bilbo kissed Theo for the last time before silently leaving the room.

"Don't worry Bilbo, we'll take care of him," Dana said and Bilbo wanted to snap at her to leave his child alone but Thorin interrupted him.

"Come, I'll drive you. I know you're already late."

"Thanks," muttered Bilbo before he followed Thorin to the car.

They drove in complete silence for the first few minutes until Bilbo decided to speak and give Thorin some last minute instructions.

"I don't want her anywhere near my son. Do I make myself clear?"

Thorin rolled his eyes. "She's staying at my place, I think what you're asking will be a little hard to do."

"I don't care. I don't want here anywhere near my son without supervision. I don't trust her. Also, you are not allowed to sleep naked or to have sex. I don't want Theo to come into your room and see you two doing it."

"Why would he come to my room?"

"Because he's two, and this is the first time I left him at your place for more than twelve hours and he might get scared and he'll need you. That reminds me – you need to keep your doors open so he can come to you. And if you wake up go check on him because if he has a nightmare he will be too scared to leave his bed so make sure he has his plushy and you'll have to stay with him until he falls asleep."

"Okay, okay, I can handle him for a few days. Don't worry, he's two. How hard can it be?"

Bilbo sent Thorin a look. "Don't allow him to play with your phone unless you are there with him. And if he wants he can call me anytime he wants."

"Yeah, yeah, I get it. I'm not dumb."

"I mean it Thorin. If he wants to call me in the middle of the night you have to call me."

Thorin parked the car. "It's not rocket science," he reminded Bilbo. "But don't worry, I've got it. Don't allow Dana near my son and make sure he has everything he needs." Bilbo wanted to protest but Thorin interrupted him. "You'd better go. I'll see you in a few days."

"And call me in the morning."

"I will," promised Thorin. "Now go!"

:::

The bus ride was uneventful. The bus was almost empty so Bilbo was sitting comfortably, listening to the light music. He wanted to sleep but he just couldn't. His mind was constantly drifting back to Theo and the fact that his son might need him right now. He checked his phone at least a hundred times to make sure he didn't accidentally miss a call, but nothing happened. He sat alone by the window for almost seven hours. The only thing he could see were the lights in the distance since he was travelling in the middle of the night. This would be so much more interesting if he could see the landscape around him.

The bus came to a stop not far from the campus and Bilbo was eager to get out of the bus and stretch his legs a little. Even though it was summer it was much more colder outside and Bilbo had to pull out a hoodie before making his way to the dormitories.

He couldn't see much since it was really dark outside but the things he could see were even better than he imagined them. He slowly made his way to the main building with an entry sign. To his surprise everything was quiet and with the exception of a few lights everywhere was dark. He focused back on the task which was getting his room key and getting some sleep. So he pushed the doors opened and entered dimly lit reception room.

One of the students was half awake, sleeping lightly in the chair behind the desk.

"Hello," Bilbo greeted softly and the man jolted awake.

"I'm awake! Sorry, who are you?" the man asked as he rubbed his sleepy eyes.

"I'm Bilbo Baggins. I'm here for the orientation week," Bilbo explained quickly. "I got a note that my room is in this building."

"Give me your papers and I'll sign you in." The man behind the desk yawned again as Bilbo handed over the papers and waited for his key.

"Here you go," said the man. "Third floor," he added as he gave Bilbo the key. Before Bilbo could thank him a tall, dark-haired student entered the building. Bilbo felt his knees weaken at the sight of that gorgeous student. "Hey man, he's new," called the man behind the desk and caught the newcomers attention. "Show him to the third floor, will you."

The man smiled and approached Bilbo. "Welcome to the Iron Hills," he said and picked up Bilbo's bag.

"Y-You don't need to do that," stammered Bilbo. He could feel his cheeks turning red from the embarrassment.

"Just let me do it," smiled the man and stole the key from Bilbo's hand. "Come, it's this way."

Bilbo didn't know what else to do except follow him.

"312," said the man and offered another smile that made Bilbo blush even more. "Third floor, room twelve. Are you here for the orientation week?"

Bilbo didn't even hear his question. "W-What?" Stop staring at him, he mentally scolded himself as he followed him up the stairs. It's rude!

"I asked if you are here for the orientation week?" Bilbo stumbled on the stairs and the man caught him in the last moment before he fell. "Are you okay?"

"Yes, thank you. I don't know what came over me."

"That's okay."

"Yes," Bilbo said out of a sudden.

"Excuse me?"

"You asked if I'm here for the orientation week and my answer is yes."

The man nodded before he pushed the doors open and led Bilbo to the room with the number twelve written on it. He unlocked the doors and put Bilbo's bag inside before stepping aside and allowing Bilbo to enter. Bilbo turned on the light and stared at the stranger leaning on the doorframe not knowing what to say. Luckily he didn't have to.

"Listen, I just wanted to ask you-"

"Ihaveababy," Bilbo quickly blurted out. Nice move, a voice in his head whispered. He really blew it this time. What was he thinking? Telling a complete stranger he had a baby. That was just stupid. "I mean," Bilbo tried to correct first impression, "he's not a baby anymore, he's two." That should turn the guy completely off. Who in their right mind would want to have anything with him when he came with a child attached?

"Alright, Ihaveababy," the guy laughed and Bilbo wanted to die from embarrassment. "What I wanted to ask is your name."

"Bilbo. It's Bilbo. My name is Bilbo Baggins," Bilbo quickly explained.

"It's a pleasure to meet you Bilbo Baggins," the guy said and reached for the doorknob. "Sleep well, and don't forget that you are supposed to be in front of the main hall tomorrow at nine. Don't be late," he added with a smile and close the doors before Bilbo had a chance to protest or ask for his name.

Bilbo immediately opened the door, but he was too late. The mysterious guy was already gone and he had made such a fool of himself. And how did that guy know where were they meeting? This was all very confusing. But one thing was clear. Bilbo hadn't had a crush like that on someone ever since he met Thorin.

:::

When Bilbo woke up the next morning he wasn't in his own bed with Theo sleeping in the next one. He was far away from his son and though it pained him a little to admit it, he really enjoyed waking up without any real responsibilities for the day.

He enjoyed a few more minutes of just lying on the bed before he got up and got ready for the day.

He made his way to the dining hall and got his breakfast when his phone finally rang.

"Hello?" he answered, all excited knowing who to expect on the other side. He heard Thorin grumble about something before he was put on speaker.

"You can talk to him," he heard Thorin say from the distance.

The was a few seconds of silence before Bilbo heard the most perfect thing in the world.

"Papa?"

"Hi, sweetheart." Bilbo couldn't help but smile at hearing Theo's voice. "Did you sleep well?"

"Yes!"

"That's very good."

The next thing he heard was Thorin taking the phone away and turning off the speaker. He could hear Theo whine in protest. "You'll have it back," Thorin said to Theo before speaking in the phone to Bilbo. "No it's not good and he didn't sleep well. He woke up in the middle of the night and came crying into my room."

"Poor thing."

"And he didn't stop crying until he was allowed to sleep in my bed. Please don't tell me you allow him to sleep with you."

"Of course I don't, don't be ridiculous. Wait, I thought Dana was there. Don't tell me-"

"No," quickly interrupted Thorin. "She left because Theodore didn't stop crying. Let me tell you that she wasn't happy."

"Want papa!"

"Wait a moment, please," Bilbo heard Thorin tell Theo. "So, no. We didn't sleep well."

"I think Theo did," answered Bilbo and Thorin knew he was smiling. "Give the phone back to him please."

Thorin did as he was asked and Bilbo talked with Theo for the next ten minutes before saying goodbye and hanging up. He was happy that his son was okay and that he was giving Thorin hell. Serves him right for not knowing what to do.

Bilbo finished his breakfast before he made his way to the main hall. It was almost nine and there was a group of thirty students his age waiting for the tour of the campus. It didn't take long before he was able to join the conversation of the group and meet a few new people.

That was until their tour guide showed up and Bilbo lost his ability to speak.

"Hello everyone! My name is Adrian and I'll be showing you around today. Welcome to the Iron Hills."

Bilbo's ears turned red when Adrian – that was the hottie's name apparently – locked eyes with him and offered him one of those smiles.

"So if you'll just follow me, I have a lot to show you!"

Bilbo couldn't believe his luck. What were the chances that the same guy who showed him to his room was now showing him the campus ground? And why in the world did he keep staring at him and offering him those smiles? It was annoying! And it was also cute! And it would have taken Bilbo all day to figure it out if one of the girls hadn't pointed out to him that their 'tour guide' was flirting with him. And suddenly everything made sense.

Author's notes:

A big 'thank you' to Chamelaucium, who helped with this chapter.

I'm so sorry you had to wait this long.

Thank you for all your lovely comments!

Next chapter: Bilbo hits rock bottom. What will Thorin do?