Chapter 4
Now for your in-flight entertainment, craziness
After 30 minutes for finding seats, putting carry-on baggage in compartments, and the extra 15 minutes you have to wait whenever you board a plane, the plane finally took off, and all was pleasant. For a while.
Kairi rested her head on Lee's shoulder.
"You tired?"
"M-hm." Lee was watching a movie on the little screen.
"Aw, you picked a romantic one." They watched for a
little while, but suddenly a kunai flew over their
heads.
"AAAAAHHH! Oh wait, it's just tomato
juice. Sorry." The flight attendant was twitching
like mad.
"W-we h-have Sprite, C-coke, and s-some p-peach
juice."
"What about the tomato juice?"
"Some extremely rude man with white hair and makeup thought it was blood and spilled it everywhere. He could've killed someone!" They looked at each other.
"Is she talking about who I think she is?"
"I don't know, who do you think?"
"I'm thinking Jiraiya." A finger suddenly went into the attendant's tush.
"AAAAAAAAHHHHH! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!"
Sure enough, Jiraiya was up to his perverted ways.
She kicked him in the face. He fell backward.
"You mean you know this mental passenger?"
"Kind of, well, not really, I mean, yes,
unfortunately. What he just did to you he did to
me."
"WHAT! BUT YOU'RE ONLY-"
She's about to say her age, and Kairi was gonna stop
her.
"OH NO!"
"What?" Jiraiya touched her breasts.
"AAAUUUGGGHHH! YOU JUST DON'T KNOW WHEN
TO QUIT!" She choked him.
"Listen you, I wanted this flight to go off without a hitch, but YOU made too late for that, and I'm gonna make you pay for that." She threw him in the bathroom and locked it from the outside. She grabbed the speaker.
"Passengers, this bathroom closest to me is out ofservice, please use another. Thank you." She put it back and walked back to the cart by Kairi and Lee.
"Now, Sprite, Coke, or peach juice?"
Later...
Jiraiya was still locked in the bathroom. But morechaotic things were destined to happen. Jiraiya wasn'tfinished screwing everything up. He tried to summon Gamabuta (the giant frog) to bust him out, but it um, let's just say he did a few wrong hand symbols. Guess who appeared insted? Kirby!
"WHAT THE!"
"Oouh..." Kirby said in awe.
"WHO THE HECK ARE YOU!" He pointed to himself.
"Kirby."
"Where are you from?"
"Uh..." He pointed into his mouth and shook his head.
"Oh, you can't talk can you?" He shook his head.
"Well, you can go back to your dimension any-" He opened the door.
"HOW DID YOU DO THAT!"
"Oouh buh uh boo..." He explained.
"Oh yeah you can't lock plane bathroom doors from the outside, how could I have fallen for that...?" The flight attendant stared.
"Your staying there this time, hentai- ooh, who's your cute little, uh, puffball?"
"Uh, Kirby."
"Aw, he's so cute... fine, hentai, you can sit in your
seat as long as you have that adowable wittle guy with
you." He sighed with relief. He sat down.
"Now as long as you-" He poofed back to his dimension.
"WUH!" He tried again. Guess who he summoned this
time? Donkey Kong!
"OH NOOUH!" When Donkey Kong poofed away he
tried again. Inu Yasha.
"Why have you summoned me here? Where's Kagome? Rrr,
you must be some kind of demon!"
"WAAUH!" He tried again and again only to find
Myoga, King Dededee, Marth, Mario, Paul McCartney,
'Wierd Al' Yankovic, and some Italian guy.
"Parle Italiano?"
"Rrr, it's no use..." Kirby walked back in from the
bathroom.
"YOU WERE THERE ALL ALONG!"
"Oouh bugah boo..."
Later...
Gaara and Rin were making out. But something was going
to stop them.
"Hey, little bro, you making out with Rin?"
"AAAH! KANKURO, YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE HERE, I
LEFT YOU AT SUNGAKURE, YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE A
TICKET!"
"Oh, I hid in your bag."
"WHAT! Kankuro, you're 12x bigger than my
bag!"
"Oh yeah, Baki-sensei did a shrinking jutsu and hid me
in your carry-on, but it wore off." A flight attendant
walked up to him.
"Excuse me sir, do you have a ticket?"
"Nope. Just the clothes on my back."
"Do you know what we do with stow-aways?"
"What?" She held out a parachute.
"Uh-oh."
5 minutes later...
Kankuro was falling through the air.
"I WILL NEVER RIDE ON A PLANE AGAIN!"
A little later...
The pilots were getting drunk, the idiots. Don't they
know they're flying a plane? The flight attendant
walked in.
"Excuse me pilots, a passenger asked what altitude-"
The pilots were passed out.
"OH MY GOD! We don't have any other
pilots! We'll have to use our last resort."
She walked into the hallway and grabbed the speaker.
"Attention everyone, our pilots have passed out,
remain calm. We are phoning someone who may help us if
he's home." Everyone screamed and didn't remain calm.
The attendant dialed the number.
"Ooh, he better be home..." The phone rang at ZIM's
house.
"Hello, this is the house of ZIM! who is a perfectly
normal Earth baby larva thingy."
"ZIM? It's Worlwide Airlines, we need you to use the
last resort."
"Again? Geez, you earthlings, I mean fellow human
beings get in a lot of accidents. But I shall help you
nonetheless." He went into his lab. (This is based off
of an episode of Invader:ZIM where ZIM controls the
Irken Armada main ship and tries to bring the tallest
to Earth.) He got on his control thing that looks like
a kiddy ride.
"Tell me the name of your flight."
"Worldwide Airlines, flight 321 to San Fransisco
Airport from Tokyo Airport. Got all that?"
"Yes, yes, I'll be in control of you ship I mean
airplane shortly." Even though the ride was so bumpy
that everyone threw up they got there safely.
Jiraiya screws up San Fransisco
When everyone had checked into The Ritz-Carlton...
Kairi flopped back on her bed.
"This is the life..."
"You're tellin' me," Lee agreed. Lee and Kairi were sharing a room. (Different beds people, geez...) Just about everyone went through the same scene. (The room
pairings were:
Lee & Kairi
Rin & Gaara
Neji & Chihiro
Hinata & Naruto
Shikamaru & Ino
Anko alone
Jiraiya alone)
After a while, they all decided to go out. But of course, you can't leave Jiraiya alone in the city without him destroying at least 10 things. And that's exactly what he did. Jiraiya got on a trolly. (Uh-oh.) He jumped on the roof. 'This is gonna be fun...' He disconnected it from the wire above which CONTROLS WHERE THE TROLLY GOES. (Wait for it...)
"YEEEEEEE-HAH!" He yelled so loudly that some of our main characters heard him.
"Gaara, did you hear that?" Rin asked.
"Hn? Hear what?"
"That yelling, it sounded like Jiraiya!"
"Who? Oh yeah, the guy Kairi said screwed up the flight attendant on the plane, right?"
"That's him."
"There could be tons of people that sound like Jiraiya."
"I know, but I still think we should check it out."
"Hn, why bother? We'd be wasting our precious time together."
"Please, Gaara?" she said sassily while kind of wrapping herself around him.
"Yeah, of course, Rin, let's go." They didn't have to move. The trolly rounded a corner and almost ran them over. They some how were on the the trolly now.
"JIRAIYA, WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? CAN'T YOU GO ONE DAY WITHOUT DESTROYING SOMETHING!"
"NOOOOO!" They smashed by the coast and a fishsticks stand. Jiraiya gobbled down some fishsticks.
"STOP THE TROLLY!"
"NEVER!" They rammed through Chinatown. Jiraiya gobbled down some wontons and some pork buns. Kairi and Lee were peacefully eating some ice cream.
"RUNAWAY TROLLY! RUNAWAY TROLLY!"
"Kairi, did you hear that?"
"You bet I did, what happened now?" The trolly rounded another corner and crashed into the table where Kairi and Lee were eating. They were on the trolly now, too.
"ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?"
"YES!" He speeded past where Anko was sipping a cup of cofee. She cursed under her breath and poofed (transportation jutsu) back to her hotel
room. Jiraiya's runaway trolly destroyed half of San Fransisco. He now had all the kids on the trolly along with about 10 other city folk and Kirby, Link, and Sonic who he accidently summoned. He was about to destroy the other half of the city when Tsunade appeared (transportation jutsu) and stopped the trolly.
After the police took Jiraiya away...
"Tsunade, how did you know?" Chihiro asked.
"Anko gave me a call and told me to everything. Sorry about this whole mess, you guys. Won't happen again, I assure you."
"Mess? Are you kidding? That was the best ride ever, believe it!" Naruto disagreed. Everyone looked at him like the madman he is. Luckily, the hotel was on the half Jiraiya hadn't destroyed, so everyone still had a bed to sleep in.
So? How was the utter chaos? Chaotic, of course.