A/N: Here's the next chapter guys! I had a lot of fun writing it and I think it's one of the funniest chapters so far.
I do not own the lyrics to the song "The milf next door". I'd recommend you to listen to the song that's mentioned. It fits and is pretty funny.
I hope you enjoy it just as well :) Let me know what you think.
Drunks speak the truth - Chapter 4 - "The Milf Next Door"
Time leap
I woke up on Sunday with a strong sense of déjà vu in my stomach. However this feeling was accompanied by various other sentiments, especially outstanding was the incredibly weird melody in my head…
She lives in the house right next to me
I like to watch her from behind the tree
She wears a mini skirt when she's cooking meals
And vacuums the floor in stiletto heels
She may be a mommy, but she still looks hot
She acts like a lady, but I hope she's not
I want to tell her I should be her man
I wanna take a ride in her minivan
It felt like I wouldn't be able to shake that song for the whole rest of the day… and the day unfortunately had just started. A soaking wet clit which still throbbed a little and a freaking taste of apples in my mouth proved me of that assumption. I was apparently going mental and had had a whole lot of sex.
I rubbed over my eyelids and slowly opened my eyes to take in the scenery in front of me. The bed was incredibly cozy and it was definitely not mine just like the room it stood in. The various clothes on the floor belonged to me though… at least some of them. The pencil skirt wasn't mine and oh my god. Regina Milf. I am in Regina Milf's bedroom. And more importantly I was IN Regina Milf! YES SUCCESS! VIVA LA SWAN QUEEN! OR whatever Henry would call it.
I'm in love
With the MILF next door
(She's a MILF, the MILF next door)
Give me half
Half a chance and I bet I'll score
(With the MILF, the MILF next door)
She's a fantasy I've been searching for
I'm in love
With the MILF next door
I rolled over slightly and took in the beauty that was very nakedly displayed in front of me. One of her still hardened boobies wasn't covered by the blanket and therefore looking right at me. Her sleeping position felt very inviting and intriguing to me and I would not for god's sake jump out of bed this time just in order to find my electric toothbrush that hadn't even been utilizable anyways... at least not for what it was actually meant to be used for. Thanks fucking much Ruby.
My hand slightly brushed a strand of hair out of her face before stroking over her cheek. I bent forward and gently pressed my lips on crimson swollen ones. In that very moment I could feel magic running through my veins and last night seemed more fateful than I ever assumed it to be. Last night wasn't the first time but it was the only time I could recall having slept with the mayor and I was feeling somewhat guilty about that now. It wasn't right. Making love to such a breath-taking and beautiful woman while being drunk hadn't been right.
I could feel the plump lips underneath mine curl into a smile and press against mine with an epic tenderness. A husky hum left her lips and affected me deep inside. What I wouldn't give for that voice being my every night's lullaby and my every morning's wake up call. I thought to myself and grinned sheepishly.
"Good morning, dear" The brunette spoke up with a hoarse voice and smiled at me happily. It was quite an unusual sight but it warmed my heart all the more. I was somehow proud of being able to make her feel good.
She continued talking after a comfortable while of silence and gladness and relief were nearly drooling from her words. "I'm happy that last night was our first to be honest." The words pushed me in a shock state for a minute but simultaneously made me remember the best night I had ever had. Last night.
Last night – Flashback
"Let's make love."
The reply came almost instantly and was followed by a seductive licking of red plump lips.
"I suppose there's nothing left to discuss here."
With a delicate flick of her hand she "poofed" us and the paperwork within seconds. The purple smoke of her magic engulfed me and made me briefly close my eyes. When I opened them again I stood in the midst of her bedroom.
"Miss Swan..." Regina spoke up standing mere inches away from me, her breath tickling my skin and her artery on her forehead was being visible.
"It's Emma… please" The anxiety of sleeping with the most beautiful woman in the fucking world in the very near future constricted my voice so that only a soft mumble left me.
The mayor nodded shyly while grinning like a teenager that is about to have sex for the first time and my eyes nearly popped out of my head. I knew that I probably looked exactly the same but she was so unbelievably stunning. After a while of what felt like a staring and gazing competition I finally took one of her hands in my own immediately feeling the tension and magic within my body rising. I couldn't believe that one simply touch could feel as incredible and surreal as this.
I tenderly squeezed her hand when I moved even closer. Our breaths mingled and I took in the strong scent of apples that I came to adore more than anything. I gazed into her chocolate-brown eyes for one more second before closing my eyes and the tiniest gap between us and kissing her with all of my desire, want but most of all love. I could feel her plump lips move softly against mine and my lips burnt deliciously from the touch. It was magic.
Flashback over
And I was unsure as to why but remembering that suddenly made me smile like a love-struck fool while hearing the words of Blanche from "The Golden Girls". It was really crazy but there was nothing I could do about it.
Oh it has all the signs of a classic love/hate relationship. And from the sparks of that conflict rise the flames of desire. Flames that ignite in an uncontrollable frenzy of lust, passion and ecstasy!
Sweet Brown immediately stopped my rambling though …Ain't nobody got time for that.
A slight smack to my upper arm and the words of Sweet Brown tore me out of my thoughts and back into reality. Regina stared into my eyes with concern written all over her face but once my eyes seemed to take in hers a smirk settled down on her lips.
"I'm glad that I have reclaimed your attention, Miss Swan." She purred before snuggling closer to me putting her head on my shoulder.
My fingers softly ran through her unruly dark hair and I felt more complete and content than ever before. I inhaled deeply taking in her pleasant smell and wanted to stop the march of time, if only for a few minutes. However I had a lot of questions that needed to be answered so I decided to finally say something.
"Hi." I shyly brought out internally punching myself for my stupidity.
The "Hi" though seemed to equal the "Hi" from our first encounter and recalling that moment made me feel very nostalgic and sentimental. My sheepish smile and all made Regina apparently feel sentimental as well.
The brunette chuckled lightly and moved up so that her boobies were visible again… not that I cared or anything. Yeah okay I'm staring at them… I just enjoy the view. Nothing is wrong with that?!
Her dark-brown eyes were gazing into mine after I finished watching her perfect boobs when she decided to speak up again.
"Do you want to know what's in the box, dear?"
She pointed to the "paperwork" – package that was standing at the bed stand. I nodded and grabbed it before I put it down on the blanket. The package lay between the two of us and now that we had slept with each other I was even more confused as to what was even in there.
Her manicured fingers made quick work of the paperwork – reminding me of last night and her professional massage within my clit – and retrieved two identical objects.
I had to burst into a breathy laughter when I eyed the two toothbrushes in front of me forgetting about all of the questions that I actually wanted to ask. The brunette smiled back at me and held one of them under my nose when speaking.
"This one is obviously intended for cleaning your dirty mouth, Miss Swan."
I chuckled lightly and snatched it away from her. Regina held out the other one and carried on with her little presentation of the "paperwork".
"The other one will come in handy between – how did you put it? – a different set of lips. To prevent misunderstandings I marked this one red. Even your idiotic ass will comprehend that, yes?"
She smirked at me devilishly but this time I knew that she wasn't just making fun of me; she definitely was hardcore-flirting with me, also indirectly proposing to put the toothbrush to use and I gladly accepted the challenge. Oh yeah evil isn't born. It's made. Here I come.
"Show me your genitals!" I half-screamed with a huge grin grazing my face when snatching the toothbrush away from her and putting myself on top of her.
She let out a loud laugh when she wrestled to get me off of her again but failed miserably. I wasn't going to lose that fight.
I bent down fiercely and let our lips crash together while pressing her down into the mattress. A moan escaped her lips once my tongue made its way into her mouth and fought a steamy duel with hers. Yet again it felt as if flames were pleasantly burning up my whole skin as my naked body touched hers and my lips were pressing against hers.
I muttered into her mouth while remaining to assault her mouth with my own. "Let's put this paperwork… to work, Madame Mayor."
Before I could go down on her though, there was a knock at the door immediately yanking us out of our heated make out session.
"Mum?"
Oh god it was Henry. We were jumping apart in an instant and looked at each other with shocked expressions on our faces. I was about to say something but Regina's fingers moved over my lips right away successfully stopping my idiotic idea. The brunette spoke up in that moment and I noticed that was probably best since I had absolutely no business here… normally at any rate.
"Henry darling please go downstairs. I'll be down in a minute."
I could hear the sound of his retreating footsteps as he was probably doing as he was told. Regina instantly stood up and conjured herself into something very mayor like. She wore a white blouse with a black blazer and the matching mini skirt. I followed her movements as well but was still being butt naked once I stood. She bit her bottom lip examining my body and teasingly smirked at me.
"I'm sorry Sheriff but I suppose we have to adjourn our meeting."
"Would you at least magic me into my jeans and shirt as well?" I spoke up annoyed with her being all dressed and me being naked. I found that quite unfair.
"I suppose you're capable of dressing yourself, Miss Swan. If there are any problems I see you downstairs."
When she mentioned "being capable of dressing" I had to somehow think of the Italian football player Balotelli who couldn't put on a bib by himself and needed an assistant helping him. I chuckled lightly at that but was still pissed at Regina for just leaving me in her bedroom all by myself. Oh this screams revenge, love.
I quickly dressed myself and made my way downstairs internally planning on how to return the favor. My feet dragged me to the kitchen and then to the living-room when I asked myself. For the love of safe sex where the fucking fuck are they?
I suddenly heard a few giggles and chuckles from outside the house and therefore trotted to the backyard. I stopped in an instant once I saw both of them outside happily running around and the water from the hose pipe that Henry was holding splashed an indecent Regina. My eyes were almost visibly raping her breathtaking and beautiful body while my drool was trickling down on the floor. My jaw nearly hit the wet spot on the ground when the brunette rearranged her bikini panty.
I was just standing there and staring when the lyrics of the fucking song made their way back into my head. Regina Milf will be the end of me. I know it.
Every Saturday when the kids are gone
She works in the yard with her bikini on
I open the curtains and take a peek
She smiles at me and my knees get weak
She walks down the street and she's looking good
She's a hit with the daddies in the neighborhood
And down at the school, all the teachers say
She's got the hottest ass in the PTA
I'm in love
With the MILF next door
(She's a MILF, the MILF next door)
Give me half
Half a chance and I bet I'll score
(With the MILF, the MILF next door)
She's the fantasy I've been searching for
I'm in love
With the MILF next door
A/N: Thanks for reading!
Did you like it? Review please. :)