Stolen Heart
"The Kings is filmed in front of a live studio audience."
Black and white. Fuzzy. Crackly. "Honey, I'm home!" Josh exclaims as he walks through the door, suit and tie, into his fifties home. The studio audience cheers. "Martini, darling?" says Alison, emerging from the kitchen, all puffy sleeves, apron and rolled up hair, handing her husband a drink. The studio audience cheers again. "Now tell me, darling, is dinner ready?" asks Josh. "No, dear. It's pot roast!" she exclaims, and the studio audience laughs. They make their way into the kitchen where Alison opens up the oven, puts on her mitts and removes the meal – she smiles towards the camera and one of her front teeth sparkles. Josh is already sitting at the table, which Alison places the pot roast down on, and she asks, "Would you like me to cut your meal up for you, darling?" "Well, I'd rather you served me a plate first!" he laughs, as do the studio audience. "Silly me! I'm oh so forgetful," Alison laments. "That's because you're a woman!" Josh chuckles, again, as do the studio audience. "Come on now," says Alison, taking a large knife, "Let me cut you a nice big piece." Suddenly, she stabs him in the chest. The studio audience continues laughing at him as he just stares down, shocked. The black and white crackling has ceased, and now they find themselves in dark color as Alison repeatedly stabs her husband. When she withdraws the knife for the final time, his heart in its entirety is seen balancing on the tip of the blade. "Prima…" Josh gasps, "Please…" A tiara – golden with amethysts – appears on her head, and she smiles, taking the heart in her hand and squeezing it, to his pain, allowing the meat to squelch and for all the warm blood to come dripping down her wrists. "I'm sorry, honey, but it's not like you'll be needing it anymore." And with that, she tosses the heart right into their trashcan, allowing it to slide down the wall and leave a trail of red in its wake beforehand. Josh sits there, pained, as the audience keeps on laughing at him. "Anything else?" Alison asks, raising the bloody knife. The tiara glistens on her head.
Josh, sleeping on the forest floor beside Joe and Dlrgirl's lamp, is seen to be having a very troubled sleep as he turns and stirs uncomfortably. As he dreams, Primadonna Girl stands above him, smiling.
In flashback, Reginafan2626 is seen twirling his scythe as he sits in his throne, looking bored. Two of his Chat Moderators enter the room, dragging with them a hooded woman in rags, who seems to be putting up little resistance. "Your majesty," one of the Mods greets their Bureaucrat, "This dirty slag," he tugs on her arm violently, forcing her to her knees, "Was discovered attempting to break into the sysop treasury." "Was she now?" Reginafan asks, getting up from his throne with his scythe still in his hand, "Well," he descends the steps immediately before the throne, until he's standing right before the thief, "I don't take kindly to thieves, madam. I hope you understand that. Harsh punishments are awaiting you." "Please," she literally begs, pressing her hands together, "Please take mercy!" She weeps. "You are to look at me when you beg like a dog," he laughs, as do his Chat Mods. "Let's see what's under that hood," says Reginafan, using his scythe to gently bring it down, revealing the beautiful face of Primadonna Girl, staring up at him. Even crying and dressed in these rags, she's still immaculate. Reginafan is taken aback, immediately entranced by her gorgeousness. "What's your name, my dear?" "Primadonna Girl, your majesty, of Glee Wiki… please, please don't send me to the gallows!" she cries. "Well," he says, taking her by the hand and lifting her to her feet, "I could hardly do that to a woman so… stunning." "Your majesty?" she inquires, wiping her tears. Reginafan tells his Mods that they can leave. They protest, but he orders it, and so they do. Reginafan and Prima stare into each other's eyes. "You're more than a thief, aren't you?" he asks. She is confused, and he goes on, "A simple thief, if they want money, they tend not to go to the trouble of breaking into the sysop treasury. The mere fact that you manage to evade my security for so long… No, you're something special. Adventurous. Extreme… I like that in a woman." He drops his scythe on the floor and he kisses her full on the lips; she looks a tad uneasy, but reciprocates nonetheless.
With Josh stuck dreaming his nightmare, and Dlrgirl75 sound asleep within the confines of her lamp, Prima kneels down with her spell book in tow and allows the pages' ink to waft over Joe from a specific page. She then snaps it shut, and begins walking away, while Joe is suddenly woken up as his head is filled with Siren's song. He looks confused, hearing it, and tries waking Josh. Josh doesn't wake, still stirring, and the music then grows louder, thus suspending Joe's capacity to care. It's so… pleasant, and he finds himself getting to his feet, seeing Primadonna Girl as a figure in the near-distant mist. He follows the song as though hypnotized, and eventually, he is standing across from Prima in a clearing in the woods. "Mistress," he utters. "That's what I like to hear," she says with a smile, "Now kiss me." He finds himself moving forward and kissing her passionately, which she revels in. He then moves onto her neck, gently caressing it with his tongue, and she whispers into his ear as she digs into his back with her nails, "Make love to me, grandchild." The two of them then fall back onto the forest floor.
Meanwhile, during the Storywik night time, a man can be seen running from a store, having just robbed it. But down the street, we see Joanna and Silvia having dinner together at a romantic restaurant, enjoying their first date. "I'm glad you decided to call me," Silvia says, leading Joanna to smile and say, "Me too." Interested, the Blood Wiccan then requests, "So, tell me about yourself." "There's not that much to tell," Silvia smiles, "I'm… a librarian. I love books… that's probably about it." "Well, what did you do in the old land?" Joanna wonders. "Oh, I was just a navbartender," she says, "And hated it, might I add. What about you? What was it like growing up as a witch?" "Well," Joanna tells her, "It's not as though I really had a choice in the matter. I was born into my mother's coven – the Wiki Witches of the West – it's all I've ever really known." "Is there a future in witchcraft?" Silvia wonders. "Oh, there's only ever been one future in mind for me…" Joanna utters. "What's that?" asks Silvia. Joanna then mutters something, embarrassed, that sounds an awful lot like… "Did you just say 'world domination'?" Silvia wonders, and Joanna nods, sinking in her chair slightly. Silvia doesn't look phased, simply telling her date, "Well, that's a terrible plan." "What?" Joanna asks. "Just think about it," says Silvia, "Exactly what does one do with the world once one has it? I mean, ideas to try for the world, whether utopian or dystopian, can be limited. Plus, once you're ruling the world, you literally have to be in charge of everyone, and that's like herding giraffes. Seven billion giraffes, as a matter of fact. You actually have to run things, and make sure it works, and dang, it just sounds like a lot of hard work. You'd probably end up snapping or getting crushed under the workload of trying to dictate everything." Joanna looks a bit blank, her life's work having just been slightly debunked, and Silvia adds something, "Plus… think about all the joy you'd be crushing." "Other people's misery brings me joy," Joanna argues. "Well, that's hardly a way to live," Silvia tells her, "Don't you want real joy?" "What do you mean?" Joanna wonders. "Why don't we head back to my place after we finish up here," Silvia suggests, smiling coyly, "And I can show you."
The next morning, Joe finds himself waking up, naked and alone, in the middle of the woods. He stands up, confused, and finds his clothes in a pile nearby, and so he puts them on. "What the hell happened…?" he wonders, looking around. However, flashes soon begin to swarm his head – flashes of him having sex with his own grandmother – and it all comes flooding back to him. "Oh, my God…" he utters, disgusted. He looks like he might vomit. Suddenly, noises can be heard from close by – someone is approaching. He appears worried, not knowing who's there, but then Josh emerges from behind the trees, followed by Dlrgirl. "What the hell are you doing all the way out here?!" Josh exclaims, angered. "I'm… sorry," Joe says, "I must have… sleepwalked, or something." "Oh, I used to do that," Dlrgirl says, "Can't tell you how many times I'd go to sleep on one side of my bottle and wake up falling out of the cap." "Yeah," says Joe, "Yeah, so we should, um, keep moving, and, stuff… and stuff… let's, um, go, this way…" Joe walks on, and Dlrgirl follows him blissfully. Josh just looks confused.
"You may now kiss the bride!" says a minister in flashback as Reginafan2626 kisses Primadonna Girl on their wedding day. She is more cleaned up now, and wearing a beautiful white dress, while he can be seen wearing a considerably less amount of black. He kisses her passionately, his eyes closed, whereas hers remain open, as though she's somewhat reserved.
Later, at the sysop feast to celebrate the wedding, Reginafan is eating beside Prima as the rest of the palace hall is filled with chatter. Soon, he takes out a small box which has been wrapped, and explains to his new bride that he got her a present to celebrate the fact that she'll now be ruling at his side. "Oh…" she says, "Thank you." She opens the box to find a golden tiara encrusted with amethysts. "It's… beautiful," she tells him. "Not as beautiful as you, my sweet, but indeed fitting for a Bureaucrat. Go on, put it on." She places it atop her head, and Reginafan assures her that she looks regal. Indeed, Prima catches her reflection in the silver wear and she smiles, liking the way she looks with a tiara upon her head.
Prima is seen regrouping with James in the morning, and he asks her if she "did it". "Oh, I did it alright. All… night… long," she says laughing. "Excellent," says James, "And you feel positive that it… took?" "Indeed," she tells him, "But you can run your magic confirmatory little tests if you want." "Great," he says, "I was just working on my phase of the plan." He draws his knife and says that it's time for "lover boy" to make his first wish. Prima smiles.
Prima smiles, but still looks slightly awkward, in flashback, as she watches her new husband lock his scythe away in the bedroom closet on their wedding night, having decided that he doesn't need it anymore. He then turns to his beloved and approaches, saying, "Where were we?" before pulling her down onto the bed.
Joanna wakes up in Silvia's bed in the morning, naked beneath the sheets, with Silvia herself nowhere to be seen. Soon, however, she enters the room, already dressed and with a mug in tow. "Sorry to leave you," she says, "I just got up to make some coffee. Did you want some?" "Um… no," says Joanna, sitting up, and Silvia sits down on the bed next to her. "So…" says the librarian, "I had a really great time last night." "Me too," Joanna finds herself admitting, "I, um… I've never actually done that before." "Could've fooled me," Silvia tells her, and Joanna smiles. "So," Silvia continues, "You know, if you'd like to do that sort of thing… some more, we could… go out again? Soon?" "I'd love to," Joanna tells her, leaning forward in order to share a kiss with her new girlfriend.
Josh, Joe and Dlr continue walking through the woods when the latter pipes up and asks what it is they're even walking towards. "Hopefully, shelter," Josh tells her. "Don't you have like a whole big castle you could poof us to in an instant?" the genie wonders. "No," Josh says, "That's the first place Prima and James would go looking for us." "Oh, I wouldn't be so sure," Primadonna Girl says, emerging from nearby along with James 1234, standing in front of the trio and smiling. "I do hope you've gotten a good rest since last we met," she says, "Although, I know that isn't true for our grandson over there." "What's she talking about?" Josh asks, turning to Joe. Joe shrugs, and Prima exclaims, "You mean you didn't tell grandpa about how you spent all of last night making sweet, sweet love to me? I'm positively hurt." Josh turns to Joe again, shocked, and Joe just appears guilty. "Oh, and it was good too, Reginafan. Reminded me of exactly what I was missing when I was married to you." "I was… under a spell, or something…" Joe utters, "There was this music…" Josh just appears hurt, and James soon declares, "Enough of this." He holds up his knife, adding, "It's time for blood to be drawn."
Primadonna Girl screams in flashback as she lays down on her bed in childbirth. Reginafan2626 is holding her hand, allowing her to squeeze his, as she goes through this painful process. Soon, however, the sound of a baby crying can be heard, and a little girl with a golden tuft of hair is handed to the Bureaucrat. He smiles with her in his arms, and hands their daughter to his wife, who cradles the baby in her arms. She is instantly in love. "Do you have a name in mind?" Reginafan wonders, "Because I was thinking… Lady Junky. It's just, elegant, you know?" "I like it," Prima assures him, looking down at her baby and saying, "Hello, Lady Junky." She rocks her, and little Lady ceases her crying. Prima smiles, and proceeds to grab her tiara from the bedside table – she places it upon the baby's little head. Reginafan laughs, as does Prima, and the two of them find themselves sharing a kiss.
In the present, Prima waves a hand over her book and the ink flies from the page and forms tree branches, which seize Josh and make it so that he's unable to move. Prima then approaches her husband and suggests that they give James some privacy with Joe and his genie. James, meanwhile, can be seen trying to grab Joe, who manages to evade it, and Dlrgirl runs at the Blood Warlock, extremely angered. However, he turns things around and soon makes it so that he's holding her close to himself and aiming his knife at her throat. "I'd advise you now to make a wish, boy. Perhaps one that doesn't involve her throat being spilled all over my nice shoes?" "You wouldn't do it…" Joe assures himself, "You… you need her." "Yes, but you have to ask yourself… how much do I need her? I'm sure there are many other ways to progress with my plans, it'd just take longer. However, if you let me kill her, right here, right now… well… your little friend will be gone forever, won't she?" Joe looks worried, as does Dlr, although she's making sure to keep her face remarkably brave. Prima and Josh can only watch, and the former comments to the latter, "Ooh, do you see how a real man handles things? You can see why I left you…"
Reginafan2626 can be seen wandering through his palace, calling out for his wife, not knowing where she is. He enters the bedroom and finds a note on the bed, addressed to him. He begins to read it and appears shocked, quickly rushing out of the room, down the castle's stairs, and to the sysop treasury. He isn't too late. Primadonna Girl is still there, shovelling all the gold she can get her hands on into a sack while Lady Junky, still a baby, lays down, swaddled, sleeping peacefully on a nearby table. "Prima…" Reginafan utters. "Reg," she says, shocked and turning to him, "You weren't…" "What? I wasn't supposed to catch you stealing from me? Taking our child? What the hell is this, Prima?" "I just… I can't anymore, okay?" she argues. "Can't what?" he asks. "I can't keep pretending to love you!" she finds herself exclaiming, and Reginafan is deeply hurt. "Wh-what…?" "This can't come as a shock to you," she says, "The only reason I agreed to marry you so soon is so that I wouldn't be executed for my crimes… I'd planned to rob you after I had access to this room, but… then I got pregnant so fast… and we had Lady, and I love her, I really do, more than anything in this world, I just… can't love you." Reginafan is crying now, not understanding how she could have done this, and he raises his hand, prepared to use magic. "Are you gonna kill me?" she asks. "I should…" Reginafan says, but then he lowers his hand, "But I can't." "I've made you soft," she realizes. A deep flash of anger rages through Reginafan and he says, "No. Death is too good for the likes of you!" He then approaches a large, covered object and pulls back the covering, revealing a large mirror. "Do you know what this is, Prima?" he asks, and she shakes her head, allowing him to explain, "It was here when I first took control of the throne. The inventory says it's called the Hyperlink, capable of transporting those who step through it to a new website entirely." "Why are you telling me this?" Prima asks, slowly approaching Lady Junky on the table; she picks her up. "Isn't it obvious?" Reginafan asks in turn. Suddenly, Lady Junky disappears in a flurry of black smoke, appearing in her father's arms, and Prima yells, "No!" Then her husband's magic makes her begin to levitate, floating towards the Hyperlink; her tiara falls from her head. "Reginafan, no! Please! Not Lady! Not my baby! Please! No! You can't take her, no! Not my baby! Reginafan please! My baby! NOOOOOOOOOO!" But he doesn't stop, and it isn't long until she's forced through the Hyperlink and into a new site – Reginafan's magic smashes it once she's gone through. With Lady in his arms, Reginafan goes to pick up the tiara and again uses his magic in order to make it melt. He then exits the treasury and makes his way back to the bedroom. He places Lady Junky down on the bed and waves his hand towards the closet, forcing it to unlock and spring open. His scythe falls out, directly into his hand, and he blows the dust off of it. He then lays it down on the bed next to his baby daughter, picking her up and looking right into her eyes. She begins crying, and he tells her not to worry; "It's just the two of us from now on, my sweet. You and me. And I will do everything in my power to make sure that you never have to feel like I feel now. Never shall you sink so low as to marry lowborn scum as I did. You will be feared, like I am. You will rule this Wiki one day with an iron fist. You will be just like me. A perfect copy. And I'll make sure that we'll never part… because you're mine… forever." Lady Junky stares up at her father with tears in her eyes.
Adult Lady Junky exits her apartment along with Rena Charming only to find a nearby store with police tape surrounding it. "What happened?" Justine asks, seeing Liz taking notes at the scene of the crime. "There was a robbery last night," she tells them, "Actually… three robberies." "You think there's a criminal roaming Storywik?" Rena wonders. "No. The timeframes and locations make it impossible for this to have been all the same thief," Liz tells them. "So what's caused it?" wonders Justine. "Well…" Liz theorizes, "Despite a lot of people retaining their professions… everyone in this town has just remembered who they are, and… unfortunately, not a lot of that includes happy-go-lucky suburbians. This town is getting restless, and something needs to be done about this kind of behavior before it spins out of control." Rena and Justine look to one another, worried.
Joe continues not knowing what to do as James points his knife at Dlr's throat. "He wasn't so indecisive last night," Prima tells Josh, who's still bound by tree branches, "You should be proud, Reg. Your grandson knows just how to pleasure a woman. I'm sure he could give you a few pointers." Anger swirls within him. Meanwhile, James and Joe just continue their stare off, and eventually, James presses the knife against Dlr's throat so hard and blood begins to draw. Not able to think of anything else, Joe finds himself exclaiming, "I wish you, me and Josh to be far away from these people!" And then they disappear, finding themselves in the collapsed village of some random wiki. Josh, riled up from Prima's taunts, immediately approaches Joe and punches him hard in the face, causing him to fall to the ground with a bleeding nose. Josh then walks away, gruffly saying that they should carry on, as Dlr helps an injured Joe to his feet, briefly tending to his wound.
"It's a shame he made his wish so soon," says Prima to James, "I was starting to have fun." "Indeed. But still, one down, two to go. And it was positively easy, too. Oh, we should be strolling the new land in no time," he smiles. "Yes," Prima smiles as well, "I can finally be with my daughter… and you can do whatever you want to yours." "You didn't get hurt in that little scuffle, did you?" he makes sure. "Aw, James, I'm touched that you're so worried about me," she says, "Worry not, though. I'm fine." "Well," he says, "Make sure you stay that way. Your wellbeing is now a focal point of our plan." "I'm well aware," she says, rubbing her belly, "But there's no cause for alarm. The baby is just fine."