Chapter 4
I wake up, my eyelids sticky. Off to my right I hear a quiet, rhythmic beeping. Am I in a hospital? A slight pain in my arm reminds me. Right. I groan and try to sit up. Soft tan fingers press on my chest, pushing me back to the bed.
"Relax." Her voice sounds far away. I want to tell her I can't relax; not when she's this close to me. I look up at her eyes, impossibly close to mine.
"Mirage..."
"Shhh." She doesn't take her hand away, in fact she's pressing harder on my chest. The fingers of her other hand press gently upon my lips. "I don't want you to call me that."
Her lips brush my neck, whispering hot against my skin. Her mouth trails lower across my clavicle and throat. I start to pant. Her fingers move lower, teasing my breasts before curling securely around my waist. She brings her lips to hover over mine.
"I want to kiss you Violet." My stomach lurches, desire rolling through my whole body like wildfire. "Will you let me?"
"W..What am I supposed to call you?" I am confused...does she have another name? So many things are streaking through my mind. I want her so badly it hurts. I try to close the gap between us. My lips meet the air. She leans away and I nearly cry when she looks at me, hurt.
"You don't remember?" Suddenly the weight is gone. She is across the room now, standing at the open door. Her back is to me. I wrack my brain, trying to remember what her name is. Where have I seen it before? How could I possibly know? She takes a step outside the room.
"Wait!" I cry out, lifting my hand. She looks back sadly.
"Wake up, Violet." She sounds so sad. I want nothing more than to remember, to shout her name and make her come back...to stop that look in her eyes. "Just wake up."
"Mirage!" I sit up forcefully, jerking out of my dream. The machine to my right starts beeping frantically, wailing claxon in my ear. I cover my ears against the noise, surprised my left ear doesnt hurt anymore.
Within moments, the beeping is silenced. My eyes are screwed shut against the bright lights in the room. I feel delicate fingertips lowering my hand. I open my eyes slowly.
"You've ripped the IV right out. What am I going to do with you?" Mirage pushes me back onto the bed. If she thinks anything of the fact I woke up with her name on my lips, she keeps it to herself. I gasp, the dream still clinging to memory. I half expect her to put her mouth on me. I am unfairly disappointed when she doesn't. She resets the IV and I don't give her any trouble, making sure not to squirm.
"H..hey." I manage finally. She smiles fondly at me, her thin frame looming over me to check the monitor on my other side. My heart flutters at the gentle contact between her body and mine, slight as it is.
"Hey yourself." Satisfied, she sits beside me. I look over and notice the small blanket, now spread across the back of the chair. She slept here?
"How long have I been out?" I try to sit up again, but a glance from her has me right on my back again. I am thinking how wonderful it would be if she really did climb onto me and held me down while she kissed me. She touches a button on a remote and the bed inclines forward. I am grateful she wants to talk.
"About two days. The damage wasn't too serious but I kept you sedated just to be sure you wouldn't reopen the stitching." She tucks her legs underneath her. "Thank God for nanites or you'd probably be deaf."
I look down at my arm, covered in gauze. It doesn't hurt now but I'm sure it will later.
"Yeah...I was outside when Banshee hit the place." I touch the shell of my ear briefly. "I didn't know you could sew." I laugh. She smiles but it is quickly lost in a memory, turning to a deep frown that makes my chest hurt in sympathy.
"There's a lot you don't know about me. No one does." She looks out the window to the simulated landscape beyond. We are underground, all the windows are like televisions really. "I prefer it that way."
"You don't look like you like it." She fixes me with an odd look, as if no one has ever questioned her decision to be unknown, to be alone. I don't back down this time, meeting her with a challenging gaze. I never thought twice about her personally before.
She must have had a family too...dreams, wants and dislikes. I find myself needing to know. I am embarassed that I have only ever thought of her physically...a bit romantically. The dream seems so appropriate. How could I want her if I don't even know her?
"It doesn't matter." It obviously does, but I let the matter drop.
"Mirage..." For the first time I see the subtle wince at the moniker. She hates it. "About the museum..." She holds her hand up for my silence.
"Dash filled me in." I don't care what Dash said to her, she needs my input too. I grasp at her hands, my voice serious. I'm surprised at myself.
"Listen. I don't think they were there for law enforcement. I don't think they were even there to steal anything." She raises an eyebrow. Clearly Dash did a poor job 'filling her in.' That or this is just another example of my perception or whatever she said made me a leader. Time to lead now.
"I think...I think they were there for us."
. . .
Mirage frowns darkly, pushing her hands into her hair. I look her over while she interprets my assessment. She is wearing a deep blue button down and grey slacks that make her legs go forever. Those glasses rest on on the top of her head. She pulls them gently out of her hair and sets them on the bedside table. Her fingers steeple in front of her lips.
"What makes you say that?"
"I don't know...maybe it was the way Sacha focused on me. It just seemed too convenient. She was there to do damage." I look down at my hands. "I didn't even see the other two, which means they were providing a distraction outside so Sacha could get inside to us."
Unless she was already there...
"I don't know what happened after we got out of there but I think..." I feel silly, all of this is just speculation. She leans forward, very serious.
"What do you think?"
"I think they were drawing us out," I continue quickly. "Trying to see how many and how strong we are." It makes perfect sense: Mandross publicly engaging the docent...the random list of artifacts. "I..."
"What?"
"I'm sorry things got so out of hand." I remember all the glass and busted displays. It will cost a fortune to rebuild. She puts a reassuring hand on my arm.
"You did the right thing. You kept everyone safe and that's what matters Violet. Things are things. You..." She turns red, quickly correcting herself. "People...can't be replaced."
"Yeah..." I don't take my eyes off her. She meets my gaze. Something passes between us but I don't really know what it is. She grows quiet.
"Sacha. She's a super."
"Yes, Dash and Petra mentioned that. Shapeshifter right?" I nod, fingers brushing where I had been clawed.
"Was...was Edna mad?" I ask, sheepish. A smile finally breaks her concern.
"I don't think I've ever seen her so upset before." I blanch, the heart monitor beeping wildly. She laughs quietly. "Don't worry, she's just very proud of her work. To think someone could simply cut right through it like that is baffling to her. She's more upset at herself than you. She feels responsible for your injury because her suit didn't protect you like it should."
"Well 'tiger-proof' probably isn't on her quality checklist." We share a laugh and I can't help but notice the way her hair shimmers in the bright lights. I am determined to make her laugh as often as possible. Laying in this hospital bed, hooked to all these machines makes me feel mortal. I grit my teeth, angry with myself for getting cocky before the mission. I could have been hurt much worse.
Unbidden the image of her crying over my body hits me like a truck. I ache with the weight of her responsibility. She would have to be the one to tell my parents. Then she would have to deal with my mother's blame alone. I don't think she could bear knowing my mother hated her for effectively stealing us away and then letting one of us die. I think about how Petra's mother doesn't know where she is.
"Do...do you think I could call my mom?" I ask shakily. Suddenly I miss her. But I need her to know, for Mirage's sake, that I am here by my own decision. I want to be here; all my doubts vanishing with the increased feeling that I belong here.
She seems surprised given my last reaction to contact with my mother. She nods, pointing to the small handset nearby. She stands and makes to leave to give me privacy. I mouth a silent 'thank you' and pick up the receiver.
. . .
"Hello?" She answers on the third ring.
"Hi Mom." I curl both hands around the telephone as if it will relay the hug for me.
"Oh...Violet. How's your trip going?" I can appreciate her trying to keep up my lie. I sigh deeply.
"I got hurt Mom." There's several long minutes of silence. "Mom?"
"Hey honey." It's my dad. She must have dropped the phone.
"Hi Dad."
"So, tell me why your mother ran past me just now?" He sounds tired.
"I got hurt." My voice breaks a little. I hear a door slam in the background. "Not bad, but I just...I thought I'd be honest about where I am."
"We know where you are Violet."
"I know. I just thought maybe she's appreciate hearing the truth, from me at least." I sniff a little. "Where did she go?"
"For a drive. You know how she gets when she's worried."
"Yeah..."
"Is there anything else honey?"
"Yeah." I swallow hard. "I don't want you guys blaming Mirage if...you know if something happens." I hear a quiet sigh. "Promise me Dad. It's not her fault. I chose to come here."
"I know. I did too." That reminds me.
"Hey Dad?"
"Hm?"
"Did Mirage ever tell you her name? Her real one I mean?"
"No. She never did."
"Okay. Thanks Dad."
"You're welcome Violet. I love you. We love you."
"We love you too Dad."
. . .
Mirage comes to check on me a few hours later. I don't notice her come in. I am absorbed in the book someone, she, left here. White Fang.
"You read fast." I am about half way through it. I laugh.
"I've read it so many times." She sits in the chair and rolls over to me, glasses perched on the edge of her nose. "Whatcha doin'?"
"Checking your stitches." I set the book down and sit up straight. She removes the IV from my arm. I wince a little when the needle comes out. She starts to unwind the bandage. "So, you like to read."
"More than just reading. I love books." My eyes get all dewey just thinking about it. I look down at my arm. She frowns. Some of the stitching on the top has come loose. I must have jarred it when I woke up. She wheels away to a small cupboard, pulling out the things she needs to repair me.
"This might hurt a little bit. Talk to me. It'll distract you." She sets the needle with thread. Her fingers hover over the broken stitching.
"What do you want to know?"
"Tell me why you love books." I feel a sharp pinch when she starts to remove the ruined threading.
"Well, Mom used to read to me all the time. All of us. I could read very early. I loved it." I feel silly telling her this kind of stuff. "I wasn't exactly Miss Popular in high school. I felt like a freak when I found my powers. Even more because I had to keep it a secret." I frown, remembering when I had been ashamed of myself, of my family.
"I spent a lot of time in the library. I could pretend to be these other people...anyone besides me." I turn my head to look at her. She is concentrating on the sewing, bottom lip captured by her top teeth. Perfect.
"When I got older I learned more about the printing process, how old writing really was. I was fascinated by the fact that mere words on a page could take me somewhere else, make me feel things, teach me something, even change my mind."
"What did you do then?" She's almost finished. I haven't taken my eyes off her.
"I went to school, for library sciences. I thought being a librarian would be a good way to preserve all that for the future."
"But?" Her eyes meet mine.
"I took a class on restoration and preservation. That was it for me." Another sharp pinch. The deed is done. She wraps my arm in fresh gauze and disconnects me from the monitors. I scratch my arm where the node was.
"It seems we have something in common." She pulls away from me. I'm still staring. "I love books for the very same reasons. That was a beautiful story Violet."
"Yeah..." She stares back. I smile dreamily. "Beautiful."
"Right." She turns bright red and I can't help the beaming smile on my face. I think I can almost see her hair frizz. "You can leave the infirmary now if you want to. No strenuous activity for a while. You're decommissioned until further notice." She stands up to leave.
"Wait." Her fingers pause on the handle. "I told you something about me. It's only fair if you tell me something about you."
She stands there for a minute, drumming her fingers against the door handle before turning to face me, arms crossed.
"Alright. What do you want to know?" I grow bold, getting to my feet and walking over to her. She frowns, raising an eyebrow at my closeness; an inch more and we would be touching. I'm just a little taller than she is so I look down at her, dropping my voice to ask my question.
"What's your name?" I look her right in the eyes, begging her silently to tell me; to trust me. I hope I haven't misread the shy glances, the lingering touches...the way she'd almost said that I couldn't be replaced. She flinches visibly. My blood runs cold.
"No." She turns away and just like that she is gone.
. . .
I am sitting in the cafeteria when Dash and Petra find me huddled over a plate of scrambled eggs. I don't care that its almost 9 at night. They sit across from me, an awkward silence creeping between us. I can't take it anymore.
"I'm fine you guys. Really." I rub at the gauze. "Just a little itchy."
"Mirage looked really upset when she came out of the infirmary." Dash stabs a fork into my eggs. Petra nods in agreement. They had been headed up to see me when I had made an ass of myself. Again.
"I thought you had gangrene or something. Might lose your arm and then I'd have to feel bad for teasing you." Dash smiles around a mouthful of fork. "Anyway we decided we should give you more time to heal before we bothered you."
"We need to talk." My voice is deadly serious. I've been thinking a lot about the last mission...how woefully unprepared we were for a surprise attack. I remember what Mirage had said about variables. I push the plate of eggs over to Dash. I'm not hungry anymore. "We messed up."
"It wasn't that bad...no one got hurt and the museum isn't holding us liabl..."
"You blew my cover Dash!" I yell at him. He flinches, guilt washing over his face. I stop myself from going further, collecting my thoughts. It wont help anyone if I yell at him.
"Look we messed up. We did, okay. We have to get past that and thinking everything worked out because we aren't liable for damage is not going to do us any good." I drum my fingers on the table. "I'm not going to pretend I'm not upset about this Dash. It won't take long for Mandross to figure out which super with forcefields in Metroville is named 'Violet,' even less considering we're famous."
"You think they'll go after our parents?" Petra's voice cracked, her face white in terror. I reach over and clasp her hand.
"It's a variable we can't ignore. For now only Dash and my parents are at risk. Thankfully they are supers. They won't go down easy."
"But my mom...she's not..."
"Petra, focus." I lock eyes with her. "Your mom is safe. You weren't compromised." My brows come together to convey my concern. "Okay?"
"Okay." She sniffs loudly but I am proud of her for not crying.
"We need to plan better." I lean on my elbows, pressing my chin into my hands. "We knew what they could do but we went in half cocked anyway."
"Edna is retrofitting our suits with ceramic insulation." Petra offers helpfully. I give her a smile.
"That's a good start. We need to develop some hand signs for radio silence and we need to start training together, coordinating our moves and our powers." Dash's face lights up. I am glad he isn't sulking because I yelled at him.
"Both of you will stay in sight of me. I'll be the central piece. I can see both of you and you can each see me. If one goes down, the other two will know immediately." Ideas are rapidly coming together in my head. It feels nice, being a team.
"What about when you're invisible?" Petra pipes up.
"If I need to be invisible, you two will hold your positions. I will signal you if I need to do that. You won't move until you both have visual on me or your position is compromised."
"That's really smart Violet. When did you get so good at tactics?"
"I've been thinking a lot about that ambush Dash. We can't let that happen again." Another idea rachets through my brain, half formed. "I need to talk to Edna. You two meet me tomorrow afternoon. I can't train right now, but I can figure out how you two can work together without me."
They nod vigorously. I am happy to see them accept my leadership with no arguments. I feel better than I have in a long time. I didn't even realize something was missing.
"Hey Violet?"
"Yeah?"
"I'm not gonna lie Violet, I'm gonna love the scar." My lips twitch up into a smile.
"Me too Dash." I'm not lying.