I DO NOT OWN THE JOKER HE BELONGS TO DC COMICS AND CHRIS NOLAN. I JUST OWN REBEL RAY. NOW READ ON AND FOR THE LOVE OF BACON, HAVE A CARE, COMMENT!

She heard the door shuffle against the linoleum floor as the Joker pulled it closed. Honestly, she had no idea what he was playing at. Could this really be the man that she had been looking for? How did the Joker manage to find him so quickly? Still, in her black booty shorts and ACDC shirt she tiptoed around the table and walked in front of the restrained man. His eyes were wide open roving from side to side like ping-pong balls in an Olympic Tournament. She squatted in front of him taking a closer look at his appearance. His hair was a dusty pepper brown, speckled with white. He had jowls forming near his jaw, well fed apparently. His eyes were green though it was hard to keep track because of his furious blinking movements.

Simple enough problem, right?

She backhanded him hard across the face earning a pained moan from underneath the duck tape. "Please, shutup and stay still."

She paced around him a few more times still unsure. Was she being fucked with?

She arrived in front of the man once more. She found that he hadn't gone entirely to fat; he still held a somewhat broad frame. Must have come in handy when he was out committing pussy murders. She couldn't help but glance down at his shoes…fucking mess.

She ripped off the tape earning another squeal from the man. His ears were reddening, and she waited for him to compose himself. Looking at his shoes she began to speak. She didn't want her eyes to distract from him talking; she knew that sometimes her glare afforded her more fear than answers.

"What's your name?"

"P-Paul."

"Paul," she said nodding to herself as if it were fascinating. On the inside it disheartened her to know that her parents were murdered by a stuttering idiot named Paul of all names. "Paul." She said it again noting how it bounced off her lips.

"How old are you Paul?"

"I'm-I'm 48."

"Nuh-uh, no. You're voice it changed, Paul. Try again."

"I'm 56."

"Hmm, you should be getting ready for retirement, right Paul?"

"Well, no, I should be but I don't have enough put away."

"Sorry to hear that Paul, my man. Another question for you Paul how many people have you killed?"

"Wh-wh-what?"

"Answer the fucking question, please."

She could hear his breath intake sharply. She knew that if she placed her hand on his chest she would feel his heart, throwing itself against his ribcage in a frenzy. Well, at least she knew how informed he was about his kidnapping. He thought that this was random. Maybe he had been out of the game so long that he thought no one knew about it.

"I'm really…fuck, sorry- I…"

Her hand clamped around his throat and she watched disinterestedly as he squirmed about in his restraints. She noticed that his belly wobbled a little underneath his polo shirt. This was all such a fucking shame. She brought her knee into his stomach earning a guttural cough. She stepped back and let him vomit on top of his khaki pants. It was a creamy orange that reminded her faintly of peach yogurt. She sniffed in disgust and headed to the tray of assorted "tools" that Joker had left her. She saw the usual; pins, scalpel, pliers, knives, vinegar, but then turned to the more interesting chemicals. 'Jesus', she thought picking up a bottle of trifluoracetic acid and swirling it around. There were other jars that held even more unstable chemicals. She even spotted a series of her own chemicals and the two beakers of the urodium and dichloryzine she had been hunting for. On a bench beside the table she saw a pair of pants, an apron, rubber gloves, a pad and pen and boots. She put them on, and was only mildly surprised when they fit perfectly. 'Golly gee he sure knew how to woo a girl.' She returned to Paul a scalpel held in her hand. She also had a blowtorch should she have any need to cauterize wounds.

She licked her lips and smiled.

"Okay, Paul…if that is your real name," she grinned wider, she had always wanted to say that, "let's play."

She drove the scalpel down with deft fingers, she knew the name of this game, and she always came out a winner.

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She stepped out five hours later, bathed in more bodily fluid than she had thought possible. Her hair was slightly mussed and the tips had taken on a silly blonde sheen because of one of the chemicals. She worked on undoing the apron, which she let slide to the floor, and then wriggled out of her gloves, which fell to the floor with a thick wet sound. She giggled a little at the noise, but muffled it with her hand. She approached Joker who had fallen asleep on the bed. His mouth was slightly open and she had to admit that unconscious the devilish clown was rather cute. However, she was not exactly known for sappy advances and so she jumped onto his stomach. His eyes popped open comically as he felt her weight plummet down on his chest. He recovered quickly rewarding her with a wide Cheshire grin.

"I, uh, thought you'd never come out. Got…borrred."

"Fuck you, I was doing some of my best work in there. Now get your ass out of bed and come see!"

He raised a hand to her cheek and squeezed.

"OW! Motherfucker!" She slapped his hand away and it was in that moment that he startled her by arching upwards and rolling her off him. She landed gracelessly on the floor her rump taking the full extent of the blow.

"Ow! You bastard," she whined as she rubbed her butt. He slid off the bed like a jaguar and crouched over her. He gave her chest a hard shove until she was propped up only by her elbows. He straddled her hips and grabbed her by her hair bringing her face closer. Leaning in he traced her jaw with his tongue. Ray was fairly certain that she tasted more like formaldehyde than a human being. She shifted beneath him and he tugged harder, but eventually she grew bored from his ministrations.

"Okay, I know I look yummy, but I taste disgusting. You're not getting any until A, you look at Paul, and B, I gets me a nice hot shower."

He looked at her and for a moment she felt as if he were taking her apart with his eyes. She shuddered involuntarily, but fought hard to hold his stare. In the end he pouted and let go of her hair. "But Baabe! I like the tassste of science and torture."

He got off of her and let her get to her feet. She stood and adjusted her shirt which had ridden up. Rubbing her hands gleefully she led him to the back room. He raised an eyebrow at her cheeriness but she shrugged it off. "Look I got a hit of the stuff too okay? I've got a little case of the giggles nothing major. Once I get started on an antidote I'll be fine." She smirked up at him and opened the door, doing a comic bow and allowing him to enter in before her.

She walked in behind him eager to gauge his reaction. She hadn't been lying when she had said that this had been some of her finest work. Upon the chair Paul was very much alive, but barely hanging on. He was laughing breathlessly and tears streamed from his eyes. She looked into his eyes and saw the fear that was screaming from behind them. She loved it. Glancing more over his body she saw the missing fingers, the broken arm, the burnt and flaying skin on his legs. She saw the lengthy cuts that rode up his side leaving gaping holes in his shirt. His hair was ruffled and the side of his head was bleeding profusely. As he laughed she could see the sheen of slick red fluid seeping from between his locked teeth. It had only taken her ten minutes to discern the three words that she had wanted, 'I did it' but she had spent the rest of her time reigning in her smarts. She didn't want this time to go to waste.

The Joker turned to her grinning just as maniacally as the man in the chair. He grabbed her by the waist and then grabbed one of her arms. Tittering madly he began to half drag half dance with her around the room. Affected by the drugs she smiled as she began to follow more gracefully in his ill timed dance. The man began to scream intermittently between his laughter but the two of them were too busy laughing and giggling loudly. With one last twirl it seemed that she had bumped against the wall. He laid his body against hers and brought a knee between her legs. Ray felt herself get wet almost instantly. It seemed that a small hit of her concoction was making her euphoric and Joker did nothing to alleviate this as he began to grind his knee in between her legs. She moaned loudly and then began to giggle breathlessly.

"I love it! I love this little laughing Rebel Ray." The Joker grinned as his hand replaced his knee. Ray closed her eyes mewling softly as he rubbed his gloved hand against her clothed pussy. She bucked against his hand enthusiastically. She did nothing to stop him as began to remove her shorts. He smirked when he his fingers met naked flesh. "No, uh, panties again then?"

"No," Ray moaned as he dipped a finger inside of her. She felt it wriggle inside of her and she moved her hips against his hand at a much faster pace.

"Why, uh not loverrr?"

He added another digit and scissored his hands occasionally pushing in deep enough to hit her sweet spot. She arched up against him her breasts nearly flat against his chest. He only giggled more as he added a third digit and began finger fucking her at a faster speed. Clear liquid began running down her legs and dripping steadily onto the floor and if she had been any less high she would have demanded that they go somewhere even a mite bit more sanitary but as it were...

"More dammit! Stop, uh,-oh my God- stop playing with me!"

His lips crashed onto hers as he removed his fingers. She opened her mouth and let his tongue plunge into her mouth. As he began to tongue fuck her mouth she thought it only fair that she got what she wanted. Her fingers made their way to his pants and began unbuckling them. She tugged them down a little and then roughly pulled down his boxers freeing his cock. He groaned loudly into her mouth as he hefted her legs up. She wrapped them around his middle and let her hands wrap around his neck. She couldn't help but emit one last giggle as she thought of the unfortunate asshole who wasn't getting any.

"What'sss so funny Ray?"

She nodded her head to the man who was now going through the early stages of rigor mortis. The Joker turned his head to get a better look and chuckled as the dead man twitched in his chair. He then turned back to her once again and forced her mouth open once more. She cried out loudly, her shout quivering down into his chest as impaled her on his cock. He began to pump into her with bruising force his hands fisted themselves into her hair. He withdrew his tongue and moved his mouth to her neck where he bit down sharply. She felt blood dribble don her neck and then the cool feeling of his tongue as he lapped it up. He suckled hard accompanying his thrusts which continued to hit her pleasure spot over and over again. She screamed until her throat was raw her hand now digging into his back. He guffawed at this and bit down even harder until she was certain she'd need a rabies shot afterwards. 'Fucking rabid clowns' she thought bitterly before he chased the thought away with another bite, this time on the other side of her throat. She'd never admit it but she loved it when he bit her. That was her last coherent thought before he roughly pinched down her right nipple. The sudden shock made her push into him roughly almost sending them tumbling to the ground. She could only let a hoarse whimper as she rode out the last of her orgasm and she shuddered in the aftershock as he came inside of her shortly after. For a few moments neither could speak, and it took even longer before Ray could even register feeling in her legs.

"This place is fuckin' filthy clown, if I catch anything-"

"Stop, uh, pretending like you didn't enjoy it." He pulled out of her and grinned broadly as he watched thick viscous fluids slide down her leg. She followed his eyes and growled. "You are fuckin' sick clown," she barked and pushed him away. He caught her hand and pushed her back. Kneeling before he let his tongue lick away the cum that was now running past her knee. He climbed steadily higher until his tongue was lapping fervently at her pussy. She cooed softly as he continued his ministrations. She felt a three fingers push into her and it was all she could do to keep from falling ass first onto the floor. He looked up at her as if sensing this and pulled his fingers away. He sucked away the liquid from his fingers thoughtfully before snatching her up and taking her back to the bed.

"You are insatiable!"

"I am what I am."

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It was with an extremely sore bottom (that Joker had slapped mercilessly) and wobbly legs that Ray managed to retrieve her notepad. She took one last meaningful look at the man who had set her life on a path fraught with danger, anger, and death.

"Thanks a lot old man, now I'm fucking clowns. Happy?" She gave his hair a playful ruffle before heading back to Joker. She found that he was just as lively as ever tapping the floor steadily, his head in his hands. He was muttering to himself occasionally scratching his head.

"Hey Joker!" She lept onto the bed and snorted with laughter as she bounced. Still high? Check.

He snapped his head up his dirty blond and green locks shadowing his face.

"Look, I've managed to make the formula, but there is still more I have to do. You want this to be a gas right?"

"Ah, yeah, but-"

"What? I mean I have managed a liquid version and I practically had to break the man's jaw to get him to drink it. You want somethin' easier to handle I need about two more days."

"Gotta hand it to ya doll, I love it when you talk chemistry t' me." Ray rolled her eyes and began hunting down her clothes on the bed. She pulled on her shirt and began to search under the covers for her pants. She found them but realized that they were...stuck? She looked beneath the covers and found a crazed clown holding the other end of her pants...with his teeth. He raised an eyebrow at her suggestively and tugged on them. "It'll take me three days to get this done and in a larger supply, you ass," she said the irritation in her voice giving way to lust. She let the man snatch her pants away from her and toss it aside.

"I can,uh, live with that."

"I'm sure you can you crazed sonofabitch, but I'm hungry!"

To emphasize her need her stomach began to growl vehemently as if knowing it were being talked about. She placed a hand over it and frowned.

"I guess, I ,uh, have been keepin' you from lunch haven't I?"

"Yeah, now get off your ass and feed me!"

He leapt at her pushing her down onto the bed once more. His tongue traveled from her neck, along her jaw, to the shell of her ear. She shivered beneath his cold gaze and was a little startled when he smiled. "Told ya babe, I'm a suckerrrr for science and torture." With that he pulled himself off her, stood up and headed to the other room, which she hoped for his sake had food.

A/N

FOR THOSE OF YOU WONDERING WHERE THE HELL I PUT JAMIE DON'T WORRY I'M GETTING TO THAT.