2/9/2012

This chapter takes place long before Ludwig became King and everything else should be understandable through reading. Starring, Gilbert and Ludwig.

This chapter is for the reviewer Vespasta who wanted to see something with the Jokers, specifically Gilbert. I already had this in mind so sorry if it's a little sadder than you expected it to be. I hope you like it anyways!

I do not own Hetalia.

-o0o-

Somewhere in Hearts

If Gilbert was being honest, he would say that he liked being Prussia, one of the two Jokers in the entire land. He liked his awesome powers because, seriously, who wouldn't want to be able to disappear and transport at will? He liked being unique and standing apart from the Kingdoms that had betrayed him. And he truly and honestly loved Peter, not only because he had practically raised the adorable brat, but also because he was the only person in the whole world who understood what he was going through.

But then there were other times when he would say that he despised being a Joker with every fiber in his being. He hated that he was alone; that these powers and responsibilities had been forced onto him when he had least needed them. Especially since he really had no choice about any of it at all.

And the thing he hated most of all about being a Joker was the fact that it had forced him to be separated from his little brother, Ludwig. His brother's screams still echoed in his nightmares, so clear and precise that Gilbert could relive the night he had been removed from Hearts in perfect detail.

It had been a nice day, contrary to what many might think. There had been no clouds to close off the sun's rays and Gilbert and Ludwig had spent the entire day in the fields practicing swordplay. Gilbert had let Ludwig sit on his shoulders as they walked home in the light of the setting sun.

He even remembered thinking that he wouldn't change this –being with Ludwig and watching him grow up- for anything in the world. Who cared that he had been rejected by all three of the Hearts Eternal Implements? Who wanted to be a King in a stuffy old castle anyways? He would much rather be here, in the fresh air with the comfortable weight of his younger brother on his shoulders as he hummed a random tune on his way home. This- here, in this moment- surely, this was where he was meant to be.

He hadn't even known that his Tattoo had changed yet.

They had been eating dinner when the soldiers had come. The knock on the door had been a shock- they didn't get many visitors- but the armed men had been even more so.

"Sir, are you Gilbert Beilschmidt?" said the one in the front in German when Gilbert opened the door.

He gaped openly at them for a moment before shutting his mouth with a snap. He shifted just slightly in the doorway, hiding the room beyond and specifically Ludwig from view. "Yes? Is there something you need?"

"We must speak to you urgently about something, sir. In private would be most desired." His dark eyes flickered over Gilbert's shoulder to where Ludwig was probably standing. Gilbert stiffened, feeling a thrill of dread in the pit of his stomach. Whatever was going on wasn't good.

"Of course," he replied as calmly as he could. He took a step forward onto the porch and began to shut the door when he paused.

"Ludie," he called over his shoulder. "Keep eating and don't come outside. I'll be back in a second."

He didn't wait for an answer, knowing that Ludwig would only respond with a silent nod. He quietly shut the door and took a deep breath before going over to talk to the soldiers.

Needless to say, he hadn't been expecting the information he had received. He had less than a day to collect any personal belongings and get the hell out of Hearts. No, he wouldn't need food or water. He wouldn't be needing anything like that where he was going. And if he didn't- if he thought he could just pack up and move somewhere else in Hearts, well, he was wrong. They would find him, no matter where he went. They would find him and forcibly remove him, whether he liked it or not.

Gilbert remembered thinking in disbelief, all of this, all because of something as simple as a marking on his skin had changed, and his world had been turned on its head.

He was shocked, of course. Who wouldn't be? Learning that you were one of the two Jokers in the whole land wasn't something you heard every day. But he did what he had to do to prepare himself; he packed what little precious possessions he thought he might need, cleaned up their home to the best of his abilities and tried his best to properly say goodbye to the only home he had ever known.

It was only mid-afternoon the next day when he realized that Ludwig couldn't come with him.

Ludwig, his precious, wonderful, quiet and serious younger brother would be on his own from this day on. Gilbert wouldn't be there to watch over him anymore. Ludwig would have to learn how to take care of himself, how to hunt and trade in the market, to travel long distances and survive military training, all without Gilbert there to watch over and protect him. And that knowledge alone was enough to crush Gilbert's heart, more effective than any bullet or arrow.

In the end the soldiers had to come to the house to drag him away. Surprisingly, Gilbert had been the more composed and silent of the pair for the first time since Ludwig had been born. Ludwig, on the other hand, had screamed as if his hand was being chopped off. He kicked and punched and fought tooth and nail against the soldiers restraining him, refusing to give up or give in. He fought with a fury that would have impressed Gilbert had he not known the reason behind Ludwig's actions.

"NO!" Ludwig shrieked, blue eyes glossy and cheeks red as he strained against the two men holding him in place. "No! Gilbert, no! You can't leave me!"

Gilbert watched, pale faced and silent, unable to comfort his brother due to the soldiers standing around him.

For a moment Ludwig stared at Gilbert, tears streaming down his face, before slumping in his captor's arms, all of his energy spent. He let out a broken sob. "You can't leave me…"

Gilbert's eyes stung and his throat felt like it was on fire. He blinked rapidly and he held back a sob of his own. Oh, Ace, he didn't want to go. He just wanted to stay here in this remote town in Hearts with his brother, the only family he had left. And to see Ludwig, the most important person in the world to him, on his knees, defeated and broken like this- it shattered something inside of Gilbert permanently.

Gilbert turned to the three men standing behind him, waiting to grab him by the arms if he tried to make a run for it.

"Please," he said to the leader, his voice cracking slightly. "Please, give me five minutes with him. Just to say goodbye. Please. I promise I won't run away or anything, just let me speak with him."

"Three minutes," the leader said grudgingly and hope leaped in Gilbert's chest. "No more, no less. Men!" He made a hand gesture and the soldiers released Ludwig, who instantly collapsed to the ground.

The soldiers began to exit their house as Gilbert ran over to his brother. He fell to his knees, saying in a hushed whisper, "Ludwig!" He tried to pull the boy into a sitting position. Ludwig was breathing heavily and he clung to Gilbert's arms almost desperately.

"Gilbert," Ludwig whimpered and met Gilbert's red eyes. "Please, please don't go. I don't want you to leave me." His small hands tightened their hold.

Gilbert hugged Ludwig to his chest and pressed his cheek into Ludwig's soft blond hair. "I don't want to go either," he said as gently as he could. "Do you honestly think I would leave you if I had a choice?"

"No," Ludwig sniffed.

"Exactly. But-" He gently pulled away and looked sternly at Ludwig. "-I don't have a choice. It wasn't me who changed my Tattoo." He paused and cast a look at the shut door.

"I don't have a choice," he said again lowly and looked back at his brother. "But if I did, I would have stayed with you. I want you to always remember that."

He leaned forward and pressed his lips to Ludwig's forehead: a goodbye kiss.

"Hey, don't cry," he said softly as Ludwig began to shake uncontrollably. "It's okay; you're going to be fine. Here, let me give you something to remember me by."

He reached around his neck and lifted a long cord over his head. On the cord hung a black and silver metal pendant, shaped like a cross: the Iron Cross. It shone white in the low light and Ludwig sucked in a breath at the sight of it, sky blue eyes going wide. Gilbert smiled slightly then placed the necklace around Ludwig's neck, letting the pendant drop against the smaller boy's chest.

"Gilbert," Ludwig breathed, touching the pendant in awe. "Is this-?"

"The Beilschmidt family heirloom created when our great, great Uncle Frederick became King of Hearts all those years ago?" Gilbert grinned at the expression on Ludwig's face. "It totally is. Isn't it awesome?"

Ludwig opened his mouth to speak but a loud knocking interrupted him.

"Hurry up in there!" said a gruff voice. Ludwig shot the door a terrified look. As he turned the pendant caught the light and was suddenly illuminated. Gilbert stared at it and suddenly a brilliant idea hit him, causing hope to flutter in his chest.

"Ludwig," Gilbert said, somewhat forcibly, and Ludwig faced him again. "I want you to listen to me, alright? I have to go away soon but if you do something very important we may be able to meet again in the future."

Ludwig's eyes were huge. "Really?"

"Yes, really. But it would be very difficult and very hard," Gilbert said cautiously. "It wouldn't be easy, Ludwig."

"I don't care what I have to do!" Ludwig grabbed Gilbert's hands. "As long as we're together again, that's all that matters. What do I have to do?"

Gilbert hesitated only for a brief second before saying, "The only people Jokers are allowed to have contact with are the Triumvirates of the Kingdoms. So that means, in order for us to meet again-"

"I would have to become a member of the Hearts Triumvirate?" Ludwig guessed quickly.

Gilbert blinked, a little startled at how fast Ludwig had come up with the answer. "Uh, yeah. That's right. But-" he said forcibly when Ludwig opened his mouth. "-it would be a ton of work, Ludwig. You would be in charge of an entire Kingdom. You would have to learn the ways of the government and you would have to read a lot of pointless books and how to use magic-"

"Magic?" Ludwig interrupted curiously.

"Yeah. To use the Eternal Implement or whatever, you know?"

"Oh. But none of that matters, Gilbert!"

"Oh yeah?" Gilbert raised his eyebrows. "And why would you think that? Running a Kingdom kind of matters, Ludie."

"Well, no, I didn't mean it like that."

"Then how did you mean it?"

Ludwig took a deep breath. "It doesn't matter how much work it would take to rule Hearts or to wield an Eternal Implement. It doesn't matter if I become the King, Queen or Jack as long as I get chosen at all. The only thing that would matter in the end-" His lips began to tremble and his eyes turned glossy. "- the only thing that would matter would be that we would be able to meet again."

And here he gave Gilbert a brave but painful smile. "You're my brother, Gilbert. And I'll always love you and want to be with you again because of that. We're family and I'll do anything to make sure that we're a family that stays whole. I won't let us stay separated from each other for the rest of our lives. I'll become part of the Triumvirate and we'll meet again, I'll make sure of it."

Ludwig abruptly lurched himself forward and Gilbert opened his arms just in time to catch him.

"I love you so much, Gilbert!" Ludwig half cried, pressing his face into Gilbert's chest and wrapping his arms around his older brother.

Gilbert rubbed Ludwig's back in slow circles, doing his best to murmur words of comfort. His throat was burning and he had a hard time holding back tears of his own. He was moved by Ludwig's speech; normally Ludwig was closed off from his emotions, or at least extremely shy. But it was times like these, when Ludwig truly showed the depth of his love for his brother, that Gilbert knew he had to be doing something right.

The door banged open suddenly and the six soldiers from before came bustling back into their house.

"Time is up," said the leader, who was standing in front.

Gilbert gave Ludwig one last fleeting hug and kiss before he was pulled away. Ludwig gave out a loud cry and moved toward Gilbert before two of the soldiers forcibly restrained him.

"I love you, Ludwig!" Gilbert yelled as the soldiers began to push him out the door. "Never forget that, even if we never see each other again!"

A look of pure panic and terror crossed Ludwig's already horrified expression and he began to struggle harder against the soldiers' hold on him. He cried out, "Gilbert-!"

A second later Gilbert had been shoved out the door as it slammed shut behind him. He never got to hear the rest of Ludwig's sentence.

He stumbled down the stairs of the porch, still in shock at what had just happened. He just couldn't accept the fact that he would never see Ludwig again. But, he told himself firmly, if Ludwig could do what he said he would- if he really did succeed in becoming a member of the Triumvirate-

"Sir Beilschmidt?"

The voice pulled him abruptly out of his thoughts. "Er, yeah?"

"Please, if you will." The leader gestured toward a group of horses standing nearby. There were six for the soldiers and one extra, probably for Gilbert.

He felt a thrill of anxiety rake through him. Where were they going to take him? He had guessed somewhere out of Hearts, but where exactly was that? He wanted to ask, but seeing the stern looks from the soldiers, Gilbert kept his mouth shut and climbed on top of a horse.

"What about the other three?" Gilbert asked and the two soldiers and the leader mounted their own steeds.

The leader said, "They will remain with your brother until we return to collect them. We cannot risk the chance of him following after you."

"They won't hurt him, right?!" Gilbert shot a desperate glance back towards the house.

"No. They are Heart soldiers. We do not harm our own kind."

The leader made some kind of strange noise and all of the horses- except the three belonging to the men inside- started to move forward. Gilbert wondered distantly, if they do not harm Hearts, what will they do to me? Technically he was no longer a Heart, so what were they planning to do with him?

It was a long ride. Longer than he would have expected, at least. By the time they had stopped the sun was starting to rise.

"Where are we?" Gilbert asked warily, taking a long look around. It wasn't anyplace interesting; there was a small creek in front of them, small and shallow enough to pass through, and beyond that was a forest. It looked harmless enough, but there was something about the lack of noise coming from the trees that made the hair on Gilbert's neck rise unpleasantly.

"No-Man's-Land," the leader said solemnly.

"What? Why are we here?" Gilbert had never seen No-Man's-Land before. From the stories he had heard, he had expected some kind of freaky mystical enchanted forest. Sure, this forest was creepy but there was nothing specific about it that made it seem particularly threatening. It looked like any kind of forest in Hearts; what made this one so special?

"This is where we were told to deposit you," the leader said. "You will go into the forest and alone and we will stay here long enough to make sure you get in safely. Then we shall travel back to your brother's town to collect our men before returning to the Castle."

Gilbert gaped at him. "You're going to leave me here? Alone? With nothing? What kind of Hearts soldier would leave someone to walk into No-Man's-Land without so much as a weapon to defend himself-"

"It is our job," the leader said with equal amounts of firmness and gentleness. "It is not my- nor the others- decision to cast out people such as yourself. Namely we are loyal servants to our Triumvirate. This is something you, a once Heart, should understand."

Gilbert was taken aback. The soldier sympathized with him, that much was certain, but he was loyal to Hearts and could no more let Gilbert go than stop breathing. The soldier had said that Gilbert would understand this, and he did. But regardless, it caused his heart to ache to think that he was no longer a citizen of a place he had called home.

He was an outcast.

Stiffly, he dismounted the horse he had been riding with stinging eyes and led the animal over to the leader.

"So, what? I just walk straight into the forest?" He nodded towards the trees as he handed over the reins.

"Yes. We will make sure that you make it into the forest safely before we depart." The leader took the reins from him.

"And I go there with nothing? No food, no water, no weapons- with nothing?"

"Nothing." The leader paused. "But we will give you the possessions you brought."

He snapped his fingers at one of the others and the soldier tossed Gilbert his pack. Gilbert caught it with a loud "oof!" and stumbled back a step. It took a moment, but he was able to put his arm through the string and secure it onto his back.

"Well." Gilbert fidgeted uncomfortably while the three men watched him. "Thanks, I guess. Wish me luck."

He turned his back, but the leader called out to him one last time, saying, "I would wish you luck if I thought you needed it. But I have a feeling that you will be just fine on your own. You are a Joker, after all. No-Man's-Land is your true domain."

Gilbert hesitated for a moment but nodded his thanks. Then he turned away from the soldiers and began to walk towards the creek. He didn't know if he believed the leader or not but it didn't really matter at this point. He was traveling into No-Man's-Land alone, unarmed and unprepared for what may happen to him.

But he was Gilbert Beilschmidt, so he held his head high, turned his back on everything he had ever known with his dignity still intact and walked into the forest.

He didn't look back.