4. The View Through The Window
Based on "The Window" by Kathy Bernard
iloveyourintimate asked: I'm so sorry but I can't think of anything but the angst after 3x09! And here we go (AU): After a car accident Oliver won't be able to walk again. Spending a few weeks in the hospital he can speak but still can't move, his life's crashed and there's nothing to look forward to until he gets a roommate Felicity, who inspires him with her brightness, imagination and vision of the world. Only Felicity never told him about her true weakness- it has been 25 years since she saw anything but blackness.
He remembered the accident quite clearly: his motorcycle slipping on wet pavement, the semi coming from the other direction, the paralyzing fear that those would be the last breaths he took. It was what happened afterwards that broke him: waking up surrounded by friends and family, their faces tear-stained and somber, wanting to reach out and place a comforting hand on their shoulder but being unable to.
The doctor came in with the news only moments after that, to tell him he'd probably never be able to wake again, let alone move. The accident had caused severe damage to his spine, rendering him paralyzed from the neck down. His own tears began to flow after that, to the point where his mother wrapped her arms around him and he could only feel her head on his shoulder. After that, it was a downward spiral.
Why live if he could do nothing? He did everything in his power to hasten his death from refusing to eat to begging the nurse to administer a lethal dose of pain medication. None of his tactics worked, though, and he was left alone to suffer in silence.
That was until she became his roommate. He only saw a glimpse of her as she was wheeled into the empty space beside his. The curtain was closed for privacy, but he could hear her sing-song voice animatedly talk with the nurses that had brought her in. She had a lovely voice, one he could listen to all day, and once the nurses left their room, her attention turned to him.
"Hi there, new roomie!" she cheerily said, but the curtain remained between them.
"Uh, hi," he hesitantly replied, not knowing what to make of the events of that morning.
"What's your name?" she asked.
"Oliver. Yours?"
"Felicity," she said. "It's nice to meet you, Oliver. So, what are you in for?"
Surprisingly, he chuckled. It felt good to laugh for the first time in what felt like ages. Then again, in the past few weeks, there hadn't been much to laugh about. "You're not the most subtle person, are you?" Oliver asked, tilting his head in her direction.
"No, I guess not. Sorry about that. I'm prone to babbling and saying everything that comes to mind. I seem to have a broken brain-to-mouth filter, as my mom puts it," Felicity answered. "I'm sorry if I'm prying. I just feel like if I'm going to be stuck here with you for a while, I might as well get to know you."
The thought of this bright creature sharing the same space with him made Oliver a little more apt to answer her questions. She seemed genuine enough, judging from the way she talked. Besides, it was nice to have someone around. His family rarely visited anymore. They all had jobs to go to and things to do.
"Spinal injury," Oliver finally said.
"Oh, I just had lower back surgery myself," Felicity replied. "Ruptured disc, very painful. I'm stuck here for a few days until I've recovered enough for my mom to bring me home. She won't be here much, though. She's a cocktail waitress in Vegas and, well, she doesn't make much money, so whatever she can bring in these next few days will help cover our costs while I'm recovering."
"You just don't stop talking, do you?" he chuckled again.
"Nope, sorry!"
"Don't apologize," Oliver was quick to interject. "I… I kinda like it. I haven't had many visitors since I woke up, and my family lives in Starling."
"Aw, that's not cool!" Felicity voiced her discontent in that pretty voice of hers. It made him wonder what she looked like because she sounded young. "Well, if you wanna chat, don't be a stranger. I'm just gonna sit here and chill, maybe stare out the window for a while."
He smiled. It was nice to have someone to talk to, a perfect stranger who he would probably never see again. They ended up talking endlessly about their families and friends, their homes, their jobs, everywhere they'd been on vacation. And every morning when Felicity had to sit up in order to work her back muscles, she'd pass the time by describing the things she could see outside the window to Oliver.
He lived for those one-hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the outside world. And it helped that Felicity's voice was easy on the ears. He loved her voice and wished she could sit beside him as she described what she saw.
The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake, the she described. Ducks and swans played on the shimmering water while the children sailed their model boats. Lovers walked arm in arm amid the blooming flowers of every color of the rainbow. Grand old trees graced the landscape, and a fine view of the city skyline could be seen in the distance. As Felicity described all this in exquisite detail, Oliver, on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine the picturesque scene.
One warm afternoon, Felicity described a parade passing by. Although he could not hear the band, Oliver could see it in his mind's eye as she portrayed it with vivid and descriptive words. He fell asleep that night thinking about the parade and wishing he could have been able to experience it with her, but with his body in disarray, all he had were her words. His heart sank a little.
Oliver realized he wanted more out of his life. He wasn't going to sit in that bed and rot away. He would move and walk again, if it was the last thing he did. And it was all because of Felicity. In the few weeks they'd spent cooped up together, she'd broadened his world with her words, and maybe, possibly, he'd fallen in love with her. He was going to find a way to move again, just so he could cross the room and take her hand, squeeze it softly and tell her that she'd finally made him realize that there was a life worth living.
When he awoke the following morning, the room was eerily silent. Only the sound of his monitors permeated the air, and when the nurse walked in for her daily rounds, he asked about Felicity.
"Oh, her mother came to collect her early this morning," the older woman said.
Oliver's heart leapt into his throat. He was saddened by the news that his roommate had finally gotten to go home while he was stuck there, but he wasn't about to dwell on it. So, he asked the nurse if he could be moved next to the window. She was happy to make the switch, and after seeing he was comfortable, she left him alone.
For the next several days, Oliver tried his best to get his fingers to move, even if it was just a twitch. The physical therapist would visit him, work with him, get him going, until he finally made that breakthrough. In his mind, he could hear Felicity encouraging him, telling him he was doing a good job. It was her voice that got him through the first hurdles in his recovery.
When he was finally about to move his hand, the first thing he did was press the button on his bed that moved it up and down. The way she'd described the scenes outside the window made him curious. After several long, agonizing seconds, Oliver was finally able to turn his head and take a look himself. To his horror, the window overlooked nothing but a grey cement wall.
Beside himself with shock, Oliver press the button to call the nurse. Agitated, he asked,
The man, beside himself with shock, pressed the button to call the nurse and agitated, he asked "What could have compelled Felicity to describe such detailed and wonderful things outside this window? There's nothing to see. Where are all the wonderful things she saw? Was this wall just put in? Why did she give me such vivid details that don't exist?"
The nurse shook her head sadly and answered his questions, "Perhaps she just wanted to encourage you and make you happy. You see, your roommate was totally blind."