Kingdom Hearts: Mutants of Twilight: Squatter

Disclaimer: "Tell me about it." - Reginald VelJohnson as Sgt. Al Powell, Die Hard

Chapter 4: The ol' Switcheroo!

The skies over Metropolis

Kid Razor laughed out loud as he streaked along the skies of Cleveland. With him was Starfire, Beast Boy in his Pterodactyl form carrying a damaged Cyborg, and a Ronnie Rocker-possessed Superman, carrying the bespectacled crippled man claiming to be Superman.

"So, let me get this straight." Cyborg blinked. "You are Superman."

"Yes. I am." The bespectacled man answered.

"It definitely is him." Ronnie confirmed with a nod. "His aura matches up." Razor laughed out loud.

"Oh, this is rich!" Razor laughed. "This is too rich! This is hilarious! The Man of Steel, trapped in the body of a man with legs of lead! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"Razor, this is embarrassing enough." Superman groaned.

"How did this happen, friend Superman?" Starfire blinked.

"Well..." Superman thought back. "You see, I was informed of a call to Clark Kent to the Daily Planet..."

The Daily Planet, some hours earlier

Clark Kent picked up the phone on his desk at the Daily Planet, the great metropolitan newspaper that served the city of Metropolis.

"This is Clark Kent, how may I help you?"

"Yes, my name is Dr. David Gundersen." The voice on the other end introduced himself. "I was wondering if it would be possible for you to contact Superman."

"Oh, really?" Clark blinked. "Why do wish to speak to Superman?"

"I am working on a device that will allow the creation of pollution-free energy." Gunderson explained. "And I would appreciate the Man of Steel's aid in a crucial step in the device's creation. I can understand if he is busy, but I think he would find this device very helpful to the Earth." Clark smiled.

"Alright, I'll see that he gets your message. All I need is your address." He answered.

A short time later

Superman landed in front of a yellow two-story house and knocked on the door. The bespectacled Dr. Gunderson answered the door.

"Ah, Superman. Very good." He nodded. "Thank you for coming. I do apologize for the intrusion. I hope I didn't prevent you from saving some Peruvian village."

"The Peruvian villages are just fine. I made sure before I came here." Superman chuckled. "Clark Kent told me about your device, and I must say, I am honored to be a part of it."

"I figured now was a good time to work on such technology, since going green is the big thing these days." Dr. Gunderson chuckled. "Ah, look at me, keeping you outside like this! Come on in, Superman." Dr. Gunderson hobbled inside, Superman following him. "You wanna drink or something? I'm sure saving the world a lot entitles you to a free beer on occasion. I wouldn't know about being a hero, or being great. I don't fit the requirements."

"No, thank you." Superman answered. "And what makes you think that you couldn't be a hero?"

"As you can see, Superman...I cannot use my legs. I was born this way." Gunderson answered. Superman shook his head.

"You don't need to be able to use your legs to accomplish something great." Superman reassured.

"Don't you worry about it, Man of Steel." Gunderson chuckled. "I may have no legs, but I still got my brain. And I can use it. Right this way." He led the Man of Steel to a cleared-out room. Inside, standing on a desk, was a machine that looked like a silver cylinder with a sphere on top of it, and a round base. The sphere had two rods pointing out of it at its sides. The rods were connected to smaller spheres that were a translucent pink. On the device's base were two buttons: one red, and one green. Superman blinked at the machine.

"What is it?" Superman wondered.

"It's my latest invention, Superman." Gunderson smirked. "You have to see it work to understand it's true purpose." Using his crutch, he clicked the green button. The pink spheres started to glow. A brief flash of light erupted from the pink spheres. Once the flash hit, the two shook their heads.

"Yes..." Gunderson, in Superman's body, smirked as he looked at his new hands. "The device worked! My machine worked! I have the body of the most perfect being on Earth! It works! Amazing!" he looked down at his new body. "Such power

"What?" Superman gasped in horror. He was trapped in Gunderson's body. "What did you do, Gunderson?!"

"Only what needed to be done." Gunderson smirked. "All my life, Superman, I've had to deal with people bullying me and treating me like a weakling because of my disability. And I was. I didn't deserve to be put in that useless body. When you came along, I saw a way out. I saw a way to become the man I should've been. Look at me, Superman! Now people will respect me!" He grabbed Superman and shoved him into a closet. "This is your home now, Superman. But don't worry, I'm not a monster. I'll come by in a couple days with food and water. And I won't kill you, either. I'm not sure what'll happen with the transference. But know this, Man of Steel..." He closed and locked the closet door. "I'll now more of a man that you are for once!" He laughed as he left.

Present time

"Damn, you suck." Razor taunted the Man of Steel. "You let No-Legs sucker you!"

"Shut up, Razor!" Cyborg snapped.

"How did you manage to escape?" Starfire enquired.

"When you've fought criminals as long as I have, you pick up some tricks." Superman explained.

"Batman taught you, didn't he?" Ronnie Rocker smirked.

"He did. Said it may come in handy."

"So, Superman..." Razor smirked. "How does it feel to have your ass humbled?"

"What're you talking about, Razor?" Superman frowned.

"Well, you're always going around acting like you're Mr. Big-Time Hero-of-the-Day, simply because you're from some dead planet." Razor scowled. "If you ask the Kid of Rock, you should've done the world a favor and kept your ass on Krypton when it blew up!"

"Oh God, here we go again..." Ronnie grumbled.

"What the hell is this guy's deal?" Cyborg asked Ronnie.

"Razor, I don't understand what your issue is with me." Superman frowned.

"What's my issue?" Razor scowled. "What's my issue?! Here's the Kid of Rock's issue, pal! You've never respected the Kid of Rock 'n' Roll! You and the rest of that pathetic Justice League of yours spend all your damn time in that damn satellite, not even realizing that there are people on this planet! I don't think you give a damn about anyone! You don't give Local Heroes the respect we deserve. If some big crisis hits, you'll leave the Kid of Rock to rot!"

"Razor, technically, I am a Local, as well." Superman explained. "And as for you not getting respect, have you ever considered the possibility that maybe the reason you don't get respect is that you don't show any for other heroes? Respect is earned, Razor. You can't bully people into respecting you."

"I'm Kid Razor, Superman." Razor growled. "The Kid of Rock doesn't need to earn respect. He should be given it." The Man of Steel sighed.

"There's his house." Superman pointed downwards. The group flew down towards the house, and Superman led the gang to the room where the body-switch device was.

"Can you use the machine to get yourself right, Big Blue?" Beast Boy wondered. Superman nodded.

"Yes." He hobbled over to the machine. Just have Gunderson stand over there, Ronnie."

"Sure." Ronnie moved to the place Superman pointed at.

"He used a button to activate the machine." Superman explained. "And the green button caused it. I can assume the red one fixes it." He used his crutch to hit the red button. The pink spheres flashed, covering Gunderson and Superman in their light. Ronnie re-emerged from Superman's body.

"We're good." he smiled, giving the 'okay' signal.

"Thank you, Ronnie." Superman smiled.

"No..." Gunderson moaned, finding himself back in his own body. "No, I'm back in this lousy crippled waste of bones!"

"Mr. Gunderson..." Superman sighed. "I'll never forget the time I spent in your body. I can understand why you feel that your life is rotten. The fates dealt you a rotten hand, and I am sorry. But just because you can't use your legs doesn't mean you can't accomplish great things. Look at Helen Keller, for example. She was deaf and blind, but became an accomplished author. Or Douglas Bader, the flying ace of World War II. He had no legs."

"Or Rick Allen." Razor added. "He's got only one arm. He is drummer. He drums for Def Leppard. He lost his arm in a car accident, and he still plays drums for them to this day. Uses electronics to play with his leg."

"Yes." Supeman nodded. "Gunderson, you had my powers, and you became a bully. Your mind is what makes you handicapped, not your body." Gunderson grunted.

"I guess I'm going to jail, huh?" The scientist groaned. Razor looked at the device, and a smirk formed on his face. He suddenly got an incredible idea...

Gotham City Zoo, that night

Batman,the Dark Knight, landed in the middle of the Gotham City Zoo, next to the gorilla cage. The Caped Crusader looked over at the cage, seeing nothing but a snoozing gorilla in its habitat.

"Hmmm..." Batman frowned at the gorilla.

"Hey, Bats!" Batman turned around and saw a hovering Kid Razor. "How ya doin'?" He looked at the gorilla. "Trying to get yourself a date, Bat-Head?"

"What're you doing here, Kid Razor?"

"Just came on a social call." Razor grinned. "The Kid of Rock knows you don't like heroes who you don't sanction here, but..." He shrugged. "I don't care."

"I got a tip that something strange was happening here in Gotham Zoo." Batman explained.

"Yeah, the Kid of Rock's here for that, too." Razor nodded. "He heard somebody got their mind switched with a gorilla"

"Really?" Batman raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah." Razor smirked. Suddenly, Razor whipped out a smaller version of Gunderson's device, with a dial on it. "It was you." He hit the button, and both Batman and a gorilla were hit with the body-switching pink light. Batman appeared to hunch over and start hooting in confusion. The gorilla in the cage ran up to the end and glared at Razor, roaring at him. The Kid of Rock 'n' Roll burst out laughing. "Ah, don't you worry, Batso!" Razor laughed. "It'll be temporary! It'll only last about six hours. 'Night, Bat-Dope!" A laughing Razor used his Warper to return to Cleveland.

"What're you up to now, Razor?" Ronnie sighed.

"Just having a little fun." Razor grinned. "I just got this awesome gadget, and switched Batman's mind with a gorilla's." Ronnie's jaw dropped.

"Oh, God no!"

"Oh yeah, it was hilarious! He was furious!" Razor laughed. "And don't worry, it was temporary." He patted the machine. "The Kid of Rock set it to six hours. Bats is gonna spend the night as a gorilla. It'll be fine." Ronnie looked at the dial.

"Uh, Razor?" Ronnie blinked. "It's set to 24 hours."

"WHAT?!" Razor looked at the device. "Ooh, boy."

"Razor..." Ronnie gaped. "Batman is going to spend a whole day as a gorilla. Oh God oh God oh God...He. Is. Going. To. Kill. You." Razor blinked.

"Ah, he don't have the Bat-Guts to do it." Razor shook his head. "Besides, we'll look back on this and laugh one day. The Kid of Rock already is!" He burst out laughing.

Well, well, well! Looks like things are back to normal. What insanity will happen next? Will Kid Razor ever get over his issues with Superman? Will Gunderson return? Will Batman kill Kid Razor? Will the gorilla actually turn out to not be a half-bad crimefighter? Find out soon! Thanks for reading!